Oh. Dear. God. This is the print ad for Jessica Simpson’s new fragrance called… wait for it… “Fancy Nights”. Oh. Jesus. Fancy Nights?!? Are you for real, Jessica? Who named your perfume, a team of monkeys and 12-year-olds? And who approved this cartoon-looking ad? It looks like the kind of cheesy image made to appeal to a tween Twihard, doesn’t it? Like a sparkly vampire is about to walk down those stairs and whisper “I feel fancy!” CoverAwards summarizes: “It’s a pretty chintzy name for a pretty chintzy-looking advertising. This looks like the cover of a bargain bin romance book.” And for the obvious joke: Jessica needs a Fancy Nights perfume because in reality, she only has farty nights.
According to People Magazine, this is the third perfume from Jessica’s “Fancy” series – she also has a perfume called “Fancy Love” (which had a much better ad). Jessica told People that Fancy Nights is “a deeper, richer scent–more provocative! A fragrance can lead you deeper into a mood. Fancy Nights gives me the chance to express a more romantic side of my personality.” Apparently it is a “spicy scent” (will not make a fart joke) with notes of bergamot, patchouli, rose, jasmine and papyrus. Sounds like a very heavy scent.
Speaking of fanciness and farting, Radar has an “exclusive” about just what is really going on with Jessica and Jeremy Renner. It’s pretty much what we all suspected – she and Jeremy were just doing it all “for the publicity”. A source tells Radar: “Jeremy has actually been dating a New York-based blonde who isn’t Jessica on and off for the past few months. She asked Jeremy when the story about him and Jessica came out and he said they were just friends and that it was just for publicity.” Hm… sounds like the source is the “New York-based blonde” doesn’t it? I didn’t really think anything was going on between Jeremy and Jess, but now I’m wondering…
By the way, I keep using these photos of Jessica so that she will LEARN. Get yourself new hair and makeup people, Jess. There’s no reason for you to step out looking like this.
Jessica Simpson ad, courtesy of CoverAwards.
This is so pathetic. I don’t even like this silly girl and I feel awful for her! She obviously has a “team” that must be laughing their a$$es off behind her back- if anyone gave me a bottle of something called “Fancy Nights”, I’d ask them why they didn’t just get me the “Redneck Romance” instead! She never should have left Nick Lachey- I see nothing but “Lonely Nights” ahead for Jess.
It looks like a joke ad that would appear on Saturday Night Live…or Hee Haw.
She looks a lot like Elisha Cuthbert.
Easy on the Photoshop!
haha! She is such a hot mess of rubbish! This reminds me of promo shots from (way back) of Kelly Clarkson.
Nice job on making Jess look thin. Maybe they pulled some 10 years ago photos to produce this.
“with notes of bergamot, patchouli, rose, jasmine and papyrus”…
also Bud Light and BBQ ribs. You know it’s true. It complements the scent of Auqua Net beautifully, I bet.
I get so tired of the bashing of Jessica. None of you are any better. Big deal, she farts. But so do you all!! She is a very sassy gal and I like her, I think she is more “real” than most celebrities! She doesnt try to be someone she isnt, and I like her for that. I loved her show that she did traveling around. The finale was great inspiration! Im not crazy about the ad, but I am anxious for the perfume to come out. I wish her the best.
Jimmy Dean, at first I thought it was Elisha Cuthbert. maybe it is a photo of Cuthbert and they figured it was more appealing.
I agree dre. And I wonder who has actually sniffed her perfume.
I actually like it. And being the beauty junkie that I am, always give it a sniff test before you bash.
The Renner/Simpson “hookup” was just for publicity? I’m shocked, shocked I tell you. Among other things I think it was meant to deflect the inevitable “Jessica Simpson is miserable and pathetic” stories that were going to be out there when she showed up at the same event as Tony Romo and his girlfriend. It actually wouldn’t surprise me if Jessica showing up in the first place were Papa Joe’s attempt to put a damper on Tony Romo’s first red carpet appearance with his new girlfriend.
Gotta admit I think less of Jeremy Renner for going along with the publicity stunt though. The Radar article is making me suspect some douchiness one way or the other with him and that’s too bad. If Jessica really likes him it’ll be the same cycle starting all over again and I wish she’d find some normal guy who isn’t going to use her.
Completely agree with #6 dre!!!!
*Trying NOT to CTFU and not succeeding*
Everytime I hear the word “fancy” I think of trailer trash gettin’ all spruced up and hooking the pickup to the local Golden Corral for an all-you-can-eat buffet.
She’s got great legs, though.
“…a sparkly vampire is about to walk down those stairs and whisper “I feel fancy!”
BWAHAHAHA! That will easily be my favorite thing of the day.
I have no idea what this perfume smells like, but I do know that is one cheesy ad and one silly name.
“A fragrance can lead you deeper into a mood.” What? Depression?
There’s nothing “real” about Jessica Simpson. She has no filter because she’s dumb so she says things that are not appropriate. It doesn’t make her “real,” it makes her stupid. Her entire image is crafted to get attention from the paparazzi. Her father stages everything, she’s seen in public with men to get publicity, the paparazzi are called when she’s somewhere. That’s hardly real.
Even if it smells good, I wouldn’t wear it. I don’t want any of my money going anywhere near her because that just keeps her around. As well, perfume is a luxury item, Chanel #5 is the closest I can come to owning anything Chanel so I wear that. I don’t want to buy anything that I can get at the drugstore cash for $19.99.
I don’t get the hate and disdain for this girl. She seems like an okay person, with a bit of a weight problem and insecure, but not worth all the hateful comments she elicits constantly.
So the perfume name is stupid, but that is how I feel about ALL celeb perfumes: Cheap with stupid names. The Halle Berry commercials drove me insane prior to Mother’s Day.
@Fluffy Kitten Tail: I think Jessica’s still paying for the overexposure and the way she and her dad relentlessly work the tabloids, especially when it comes to her personal life. They give a lot of the people the vibe that they’re carefully marketing a storyline, probably to sell whatever new product she’s got out there. So people take a delight in tearing that storyline down.
But for some people there’s also an element of cruelty in there in that people see the insecurity and how badly she wants respect which makes Jessica an easy target.
That dress is hideous. She seriously needs to fire her stylist.
The next fragrance could be called Fanci Fart.
I gotta say…even though I consider Jessica Simpson kind of a joke…my daughter gave me a bottle of Fancy Love for Mother’s Day and whenever I wear it, I have total strangers come up to ask what I’m wearing because it smells so good.
Why not call it ‘sexual napalm’ or ‘stink breath’, lol.
ViktoryGin: Hahahahahaha! Now THAT is funny! Lol
But am I the only one who thinks that Jess herself looks really great in the ad? I’m so happy they didn’t airbrush her down to a size 2 for it (AHEM Mariah Carey) But they definetly could have chosen a better finish for the picture and different color bottle (I’m not sure how well a GREEN perfume will sell)…
But generally speaking I love the Fancy perfume. The original is actually one of my favorites : )
I don’t think there is a deep seeded hate for her, she doesn’t really do anything anymore except dress poorly and make comments about farting and stuff — it’s more like good natured teasing I think
Also, that perfume bottle is fug, even if it smelled amazing I wouldn’t want that on my vanity
Looks like this is marketed for the trailer park set. No doubt they will love it there.
I really like her, poor thing….her people just aren’t doing her any favors!
You know what’s funny? Just glancing at the photo I thought she was on a rickety roof, not at the bottom of marble stairs…it gave me the impression that she was going for a witchlike thing…
Anyway, it makes more sense to me that she’s a creepy stalker witch on a rooftop so I’ll leave it at that.
I haven’t smelled a single perfume by a singer, actress, celebutard, tabloid target that I would actually use.
I feel bad for Jessica, but it really is her own fault for putting so much out there and being so over-exposed. I think she’d be much happier in another state, married to a normal guy.
it reminds me of one of those ‘romance novel’ covers…all that’s missing is fabio.
honey, make fun of her if you like, but this broad is crazy like a fox!!!
her brand is off the charts successful.
& guess what? although she’s pushing 30+
and has tacky ‘harlequin romance’ ads…i betcha she’ll sell 1 million bucks of that stuff ’cause she’s still got a young look and will reach her target demographic:
teenage girls
i didn’t think that i’d want to buy anything with her name on it. but her ‘designer knock-off’ shoe game is insane and at great prices.
so, that texan (i.e. somewhat tacky, corny) style may not be for everyone *cough-beyonce-cough* but dagnamit, it sure does sell.
don’t hate the playa, y’all. 🙂
Guesty: I thought the exact same thing when I saw the pic–where the heck is the leading man holding her in an embrace as her hearts pounds and his virile manhood is pressing on her inner thigh?
I love and forgive Jess for a lot of her blunders. And I also adore that she is who she is and makes no apologies–now that’s genuine. (Which cannot be said about a lot of Hollywood.) I just wish someone would take her sweet little ol’ hand and guide her to better fashion and makeup choices. I guess Ken Paves can only do so much and his deal is hair.
The perfume name though–aaarrrgh!
I’m sure it smells just fine and she’s an alright person… but SERIOUSLY?? “Fancy Nights” was the best thing she could come up with??? I mean I get it if you don’t want to name it something French or pretentious sounding, but “FANCY NIGHTS??” That just sounds like an idea one would come up with if she found herself missing a few teeth, and more than a few brain cells.
@Cletus: Haha, so true! Though you forgot the fragrant smell of her Nicorette breath, it really brings out the Aqua Net and BBQ!
“fancy nights?” that’s what the ad people came up with? i wonder what they rejected…
“double wide”
“chicken or tuna?”
“double D”
“napalm”
“high waisted jeans”
What I find hilarious about the celebrity lines, especially the shoes and clothes, is that they (e.g. JSimp, JLo, the Olsens) sell patsies this plastic mass-produced crap so they can keep themselves in Louis Vuitton and Gucci.
If they’re not willing to wear it, neither should anyone else.
Give a rare credit to SJP, at least she has enough smarts/professionalism/integrity to always consistently model the lines she’s involved in (Bitten, her perfumes & now Halston).
Great comment 33 and also Persistent Cat.Kitten Tail perhaps the disdain for this bimbo is that she has no discernible talent – God, she couldn’t even act in that lame Dukes remake, she was summarily dropped from her label because her “music” is crap, and she’s an adult stage managed by her father/pr team like a five year old – and yet she’s made millions while true talent goes languishing; her stupidity is not endearing coming from a supposed adult, its infuriating.
Actually, Jessica does wear her own shoes. And even though she is kind of a ditzy girl, she is true to her self and makes no apologies. It seems like she doesn’t have a mean bone in her body. One thing I will say is that she needs to learn to dress for her body type, she is an apple and needs to stop dressing like a pear. Short girls with thick torsos shouldn’t wear maxi-dresses made out of a stiff material, come on stylists!!!!
I couldn’t agree with jover more. JSimps 15 mins should have been over years ago!
Okay, wait- her shoes are awesome.
“Fancy Feet”?
She looks like she’s going to explode in the second picture.
@ Patrice
🙂
@ flutters
Totally agree about people pounching at the slightest detection of insecurity. I don’t know if it’s inherent cruelty, so much as projection.
Anyway, I actually like the girl. That’s why I usually refrain from commenting on her. The name of that fragrance, however, is atrocious and someone should have re-thought that before sending the perfume into production.
I agree with RHONYC..( BTW I LOVE That Show ) Jessica is beautiful, smart and silly but, she ” Is ” a successful Woman, period ! NO ONE can deny the true fact, she does ” Indeed ” have all the right moves, she’s a success, she’s famous and she’s ” Whatever ” else you want to say but one thing she is NOT..is stupid ! I’m sure Jessica has more $$$ than most ANYBODY posting comments here, and if ” Stupidity ” gets you fame, fortune and success, then YOU can learn something from her, and rather than knocking her down, praise the fact that in a ” Mans World ” she is one of few, but very powerful Women who has the success that ” Most ” of us all dream about. So, to Jessica, well done my darling…
Fancy Nights sounds like a perfume for cats.
I recently watched an episode of Jessica’s show that was shot in South America. She came across as anything but stupid. You cannot be stupid and achieve the level of success that she has. As far as the name of her perfume I have to agree that it is a little lame but it will probably still sell because it is hers.
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