Jake Gyllenhaal might like to party, flirt, dance and generally be adorable with what seemed to be a series of Russian hookers, but his heart still belongs to Isabel Lucas, his rumored girlfriend of about two months or so. I hadn’t heard anything about them for a while, so I had begun wondering if perhaps the Jake-Isabel thing was just a quick rebound. Not so, according to Mike Walker’s gossip column in the Enquirer. According to his sources, they are very much hot and heavy:
Jake Gyllenhaal finally stopped boo-hooing over his breakup with Reese Witherspoon after mega-gorgeous Aussie actress Isabel Lucas turned him every which way but loose during a wild night at Montreal’s GoGo Lounge – then climaxes her performance with a hot ‘n’ sweaty Down Under The Table tour!
Said my witness: “Talk about a close encounter of the hottest kind – Jake and Isabel were all over each other! And she was definitely the aggressor. Jake actually looked a little uneasy when Isabel did a mock lap dance – then suddenly shoved him off his chair and under their table, obviously wanting a little privacy while she worked her magic.”
Egged on by cheering patrons, Isabel kept things moving under the table until Jake – suddenly embarrassed at being the club’s hottest attraction – wriggled out of her clutches and sat down with her again.
Said the source: “They cooled for a bit, but you could see the heat rising. After a while, Jake helped Isabel to her feet and they left, looking like they needed a little more privacy than their table could provide.”
[From Mike Walker’s column, The National Enquirer, print edition]
At one point I thought “Jeez, Jake is such a tight-ass.” But then I thought about it, and I would probably be uncomfortable too if something similar happened. Honestly, I’ve made out (and other stuff) in dank bars, but that was when I was a kid. Jake and I are about the same age – and when you get to a certain age, doing that sh-t in bars or clubs is just gross and cheesy. Still, it wouldn’t hurt Jake to loosen up a little – he probably wasn’t expecting Isabel and The Club Hand-Job. He’s used to Reese and The Lights Out Before You Touch Me.