Oooh, I love this story! I hope at least parts of it are true, because it just gave me the biggest flashback to high school EVER. It’s all about hidden, secret crushes and playing two boys off of each other and being epically cool. I never did any of that stuff in high school (especially the cool part), but I did watch and learn from the cool girls. As we all should – because Kristen Stewart is playing this sh-t like a pro.

So In Touch Weekly’s story starts out as a simple love triangle – Robert Pattinson is jealous of Kristen’s On the Road costar Tom Sturridge. K-Stew and Tom have apparently been flirting and hanging out and having a great time. So, Sparkles got his panties in a wad about that. Here’s the rub though: Tom and Sparkles are BFFs! Sparkles and Tom are so tight that Kristen used to bitch to Sparkles about Tom taking up so much of his time! Oh, Kristen. You fabulous bitch. Flirting with your boyfriend’s best friend and getting them to fight over you, thus making their (time-consuming) friendship null and void because of the power of the vadge? Awesome.

Kristen Stewart’s blossoming friendship with co-star Tom Sturrridge – Robert Pattinson’s BFF – has become a sore spot for the low-profile Twilight couple.

According to a friend, Kristen and Tom were once rivals for Ron’s attention – with Kristen always jealous of all the time Tom and Rob spent together.

“But Rob intervened and helped make peace between the two – a move he may now regret,” the friend says.

While Rob was busy filming Water For Elephants, Kristen occupied herself by spending nights with Tom, including a July 9 outing to the Troubadour nightclub in LA that infuriated Rob, the friend says.

Most recently, Rob raced to the Montreal set of On the Road after stories had been trickling back to him about Kristen and Tom’s on- and off-set flirtations.

“Kristen’s telling friends that she’s falling for Tom, as he has all of Rob’s great qualities without the baggage: Rob’s fear of commitment and the intense scrutiny their relationship brings,” the friend says.

[From In Touch Weekly, print edition]

Can you imagine the breast-beating and heartbreak in the Twihard universe if Kristen ever dumped Sparkles for Tom? True, there would heartbreak if she dumped Sparkles for anybody, but if she left him for his best friend? This would a Shakespearean-level tragedy in the TwiWorld. And by “Shakespeare” I mean “the dude Twihards consider the second best author after Stephenie Meyer.” If Kristen pulled off that hat trick, she would be universally reviled. I don’t think she would – but damn, that’s a funny scenario, isn’t it?

Oh, Gossip Cop “refuted” the story here – but they don’t have a denial or quotes to back it up or anything. I think this story has the whiff of plausibility, just because I want to believe that Kristen is this clever.

Also… damn, Tom Sturridge and Sparkles are a pair, aren’t they? Open-mouthed, fey, pretty. Yeah, I can see this sh-t. And I mean the homoeroticism.