Is Sean Penn pushing Scarlett Johansson into marriage?

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The first thing that I read this morning was an email from Bedhead asking what was going on with Sean Penn in these photos. Bedhead’s theory (that she came up with independently) is the same theory that CB and I were working on more than a month ago. At that time, I was looking through photos of Sean and it suddenly struck me: the man wears a toupee, and it’s a really sketchy-looking toupee at that. Well, in these photos, Sean’s hair isn’t looking so rug-like, but now we’re wondering if there are some hair plugs at play.

Anyway, this was Sean flying solo last night at the Tribeca Film Festival. He looks all kind of rough, but he also looks like an old guy who is trying desperately to keep up with his young girlfriend. That’s a look, you know? The look is tired, slightly depressed, with a hint of shame. He also looks a bit thinner, which is no surprise because he’s been photographed working out and jogging quite a bit since he and ScarJo got together. He’s worried about his saggy ass! But ScarJo doesn’t care:

SCARLETT JOHANSSON’s mega-entrancin’ 24-years-older SEAN PENN, reassuring pals who worry he’s getting too serious too fast that she’s “not rushing into anything” after her painful breakup with hubby RYAN REYNOLDS – but ScarJo confesses she loves sitting at the feet of (so to speak) the…er, aged sage!

“Scarlett says every day with Sean is an education equivalent to a college course – he’s so worldly and knowledgeable,” reports a friend.

“She knows she married Ryan way too fast, but insists she’s a quick learner. Even though marriage seems to be on Sean’s mind and he’s pushing things a little fast, Scarlett’s doing her best to hold him off at the pass.”

[From The National Enquirer]

I’ve said it before, but I buy that dynamic a lot more than I buy the whole “Sean is telling ScarJo to lose weight, and she’ll do anything he says” dynamic. While I don’t think ScarJo is the brightest bulb, I think it’s more likely that Sean is in a ScarJo biscuit-haze equal to her own dong haze. They’re just sexed up and loved up and enjoying every (shameful) minute.

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Photos courtesy of WENN.

 

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32 Responses to “Is Sean Penn pushing Scarlett Johansson into marriage?”

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  1. Mizz Tickles says:

    Dude, no need to wear all that foundation!

  2. the original bellaluna says:

    Don’t laugh, but maybe she reminds him of a young Robin, back in the day? (Though God only knows why.)

    And maybe it’s a bit of a dig at Ryan: “Look who I can do!” Hell, maybe even at Robin, who knows.

  3. brin says:

    The last thing these two need is to get married. Wear your biscuits/dong out but please don’t make it legal, it won’t last.

  4. the original bellaluna says:

    *waves to brin* Morning!

  5. Micki says:

    On a complete sidenote: a friend told me they got together because of their..zodiac sighs. It’s supposed to be initial attraction, dark, passionate, challenging relationship. The seas will crash, the Earth will shake and then…there’ll be plenty of pots and pans flying.

  6. klimp says:

    is it wrong that I find him attractive? hes more than twice my age..these aren’t great pics though

  7. searching4grace says:

    EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. That’s really all i have to say about any Sean Penn post.

  8. Marjalane says:

    Those are the meanest eyes I’ve seen in awhile. I’d bet serious cash that at some point within the term of he and Scarjo’s relationship, she will have to offer some lame excuse for bruises or “a fall”.

  9. krissy says:

    I just realized that I am the same age as Scarjo, I cannot imagine already being married and divorced and then dating a super old guy, I guess she doesn’t have any non-ass kissing girlfriends to tell her how gross he is ..ew

  10. dorothy says:

    I think I just threw up a little in my mouth…..

  11. brin says:

    Mornin, bellaluna *waving back at ya*

  12. Cirque28 says:

    “Scarlett says every day with Sean is an education equivalent to a college course – he’s so worldly and knowledgeable,” reports a friend.

    After I wasted all that money on student loans! Apparently I just had to f*** an aging, nicotine-stained thug…

    Sean’s probably telling her, “Hey baby, soon I’ll teach you how to get a PhD.”

  13. Hautie says:

    I tend to believe that Sean’s hair tends to look off, cause he is not getting it dyed all the way. (I don’t believe it is a rug or plugs)

    Like he is having the top and partial sides dyed. But he is leaving the gray temples.

    So it gives off the vibe of a toupee when it is not. Two tone (natural color mixed with dye) hair just does not work on anyone.

  14. beth says:

    “He looks all kind of rough, but he also looks like an old guy who is trying desperately to keep up with his young girlfriend. That’s a look, you know? The look is tired, slightly depressed, with a hint of shame.”

    OMG, this gave me a great belly chuckle, thank you!

  15. Mick says:

    I think she is going to end up marrying the old guy. She is very insecure and Penn gives her the security that Ry could not give her. Scarjo and Ry, both suffered from their own insecurities, he was very jealous and she needed alot of attention.

    Perhaps, Penn could make the marriage work because of his experience, and the boast to his ego of having a beautiful, young, sexy woman as his wife. He is taking care of his health because he is in the relationship for the long haul. He is re-inventing himself.

  16. Ari says:

    I think he looks damn good and he has really lost a lot of weight in that gut of his…what really annoys me though is not him but how men age so much more gracefully than women (without plastic surgery) its aggravates me TO NO END haha

  17. Age difference kills the future happiness potential in relationships, plus whole world is in love with her…Sean is a great artist as well…But still, if love is there…no such rule applies…

  18. Stacia says:

    @ Marjalane:
    That was funny as hell.

    His face looks like hell, but his body still looks good.

  19. OtherChris says:

    He wouldn’t do anything for me if he was covered in money and holding a hot fireman carrying a soft warm kitten.

  20. The Other Katherine says:

    Dear Scarlett,

    Run far. Run fast.

    Sincerely,
    The World

  21. Nancy says:

    @The original bellaluna: Actually she doesn’t look anything like Robin IMO she looks more like a young Madonna.

  22. the original bellaluna says:

    @ Nancy – Yeah, she doesn’t strike me as very Robin-esque either. Unless it’s something other than her looks.

  23. Jenn says:

    @ Ari are you serious? Are we looking at the same picture? Almost every 50-something woman I know is aging more gracefully then Penn.

  24. Dagny says:

    Agree about the bad hair dye. It does look like he might have plugs though – hair transplants are pretty good these days. Most likely a good number of older male celebs have had one. Anyway, his hair looks pretty decent, minus the grease and dye.

  25. Cherry Rose says:

    I’ve been with my share of older guys, and I have to say, majority of the time sex is great.

    However, unlike Scar-Jo, I’m pretty independent, so there’s never been any times where I’ve been under the dong haze.

  26. Newbie says:

    His hair looks crazy to me, but I don’t see how it’s plugs or a rug. It looks real, however unkempt.

  27. Janna says:

    I was once involved with a much older man, and it was an amazing time. I just didn’t get out soon enough. And it may not be politically correct to say, but I get why an older man would get off on a beautiful young woman who has all the freedom in the world and looks at you like you’re brilliant. Life drags you down sometimes as life goes on He probably feels renewed with her. That feeling doesn’t last, because she will tire of him and his issues. But I get why it would be intoxicating to him. She’s sexy and so pretty.

  28. Mtn Girl says:

    @Marjalane – ITA, he’s had a rep as a mean drunk for decades and put Madonna thru the ringer though she is probably no picnic herself – what does that say about him? His *bad boys* character comes to the surface every few years, what’s up with that?

  29. Trashaddict says:

    It’s sad that a young woman’s ego can be so underdeveloped that she willingly attaches herself to a man who is a publicly acknowledged asshole (and maybe violent?) when it comes to relationships. Moms, raise your girls to have faith in themselves. May-December romances are probably good for tutorials and life experience and probably make for better sexual compatibility but I don’t think they often last in the long run.

  30. ordinarygirl86 says:

    ITA Kaiser! I think the tabloids are all WRONG- Scarjo is running the show and in control not the other way around!

  31. lala says:

    i don’t know- why does someone over 40 have to be gross? has anyone been in a relationship with the same age gap?