In the scope of this gossip website, very few of you probably care about Transformers: Dark of the Moon as an action movie. What really matters here is the rightful absence of Megan “Trash Talking” Fox, who got herself fired (although she says she quit) from a very lucrative franchise and, let’s face it, the best break of her career. Of course, the entire Tranformers franchise is merely amplified popcorn fare, but slo-mo boobs are really the extent of Fox’s talent. So after disinfecting Fox’s newly-vacated set trailer, Michael Bay recruited a new vacant bobblehead, Rosie Huntington-Whitely (a Victoria’s Secret model that appeared in one of the Bay-directed commercials), who was only too happy to wash Bay’s Ferrari and even put some extra plumping into that upper lip of hers just for the occasion of filming:

As far as the trailer is concerned, Whitely is ridiculously glamour-trashy as the love interest of Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf), who could never score a pimped-out, collagen-filled babe like that in the real world. Then again, Sam couldn’t have scored Fox’s Mikaela Banes either, but at least Fox looked less plastic in the first two Transformer movies than she does these days. What truly bothers me about this trailer, however, is that we get just a brief glimpse of Francis McDormand but no peek at John Malkovich. C’mon Bay, you’ve gotta give a little something to the ladies too.

Movie stills courtesy of AllMoviePhoto and Apple