The Kat-Face Kardashian wedding of the century will be televised!

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I don’t know why this story is making headlines, because it seems like one of the most obvious developments in entertainment news. Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries’s wedding is already being negotiated for a special E! show. SHOCKING. The only story I’m interested in is how much money Kat-Face is going to make off of it, WHEN NOT IF she sells the rights to her wedding to Ass-Plants INC. But here you go, “speculation” as to whether Kim will sell her wedding…. Will she? Won’t she? Will she be the most Kat-faced bride ever?!

The family does everything on camera already—you know, like giving birth and getting bikini waxes—so it’s no surprise that an E! crew will likely be at the top of Kim Kardashian’s wedding invite list.

“It comes with the territory,” sis Kourtney dished when we popped the question, before Khloé chimed in: “I mean, I would assume it would be…we sell our souls to E!, but that’s obviously up to Kim and Kris.”

Yeah, if she means momager Kris Jenner, right? Forget the fiancé!

“I have somebody waiting out in the hallway to discuss this very thing!” Mama K (joined by Kourtney and Khloé) confessed at E! headquarters, when we pressed on the day of the engagement announcement.

“This is the thing, one of the biggest joys in my life is the fact that we have Khloé and Lamar’s experience on E! They filmed it and every time I watch that, I cry.”

To which Kourtney dead-pan/sassed, “Boo-hoo.”

“I went through it so quickly,” the matriarch with a huge-ass rock continued, ignoring her spawn who was sitting next to the sis with the equally huge-ass rock. “And so fast and furious, you don’t stop and take the little mental snapshots.”

[From E! News]

What are your thoughts on Kris Jenner’s “management” of her daughters? I would love it so much if one of them went out and got REAL management, someone who didn’t think it was a good idea to shill every single thing to E! But that will never happen. Kim and Kourtney will be 60 years old and Kris will be in a wheelchair (an unfortunate stripper pole incident) and Kris will still be selling the rights to Kim’s first hip replacement surgery.

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Photos courtesy of WENN.

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74 Responses to “The Kat-Face Kardashian wedding of the century will be televised!”

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  1. louise says:

    Considering they aired Khloe’s wedding I don’t see why they wouldn’t air Kim’s. The most disturbing about this interview is that they seem to live their lives for the cameras. Everything they do is for the show not for themselves.

  2. tango says:

    Of course the wedding will be televised. It’s probably in the contract Kim is making Kris (boyfriend) sign at the urging of the mother.

    Then the wedding night will be taped too and will be sex tape #2 to be conveniently “leaked” if Kim needs some money or attention in the future.

  3. fabgrrl says:

    Gawd, that larger sister needs to start dressing better.

  4. Eve says:

    I’d be surprised it it wasn’t going to be televised.

    This woman would televise herself in the bathroom, doing # 2, if that meant she could profit from it.

  5. lucy2 says:

    Will they televise the wedding night too? Since she got her start in amateur porn and all.
    I kept doubting they’d actually make it down the aisle, but if there’s an E contract and more exposure involved, they’ll do it no matter what.
    GROSS.

  6. brin says:

    They are so disgusting and we already knew this would happen so this definitely is not news.

  7. Blue says:

    Of course they’re gonna sell it to E! Like they said they already sold their souls to them. That mother is gonna milk every last cent she can out of them. I’m sure she wishes Rob would get a job so he can be managed too.

    She is glad E! did Khlomar’s wedding so she can relive it. I wonder what she thinks normal people use a wedding photographer & videographer for

  8. Quest says:

    We all knew this was coming, their lives evolve around the exposure/cameras and money.

    We also have a great idea how it is all gonna end for most of the KK clan (not good)

  9. Anya says:

    This family must love capitalism!

  10. Lila says:

    What is it going to take to end all this nonsense?

  11. Jackson says:

    Bleh. I am constantly amazed that enough people care to watch this junk that it would be profitable for E! or any other network to televise it. I just don’t get the interest in this chick and her sisters.

  12. PrettyLights says:

    Kim’s face is going to give me nightmares tonight, thanks a lot! An older man I work with last night who is a basketball fan asked me yesterday why Kim/this family is famous…are they actresses or something? I just laughed and said they’re famous for being famous, and for Kim’s sex tape. He said “I don’t understand that” I don’t either.

  13. yt says:

    I have previous plans for the date and time of the wedding. So sad that I will miss it.

    More power to the girls for finding a way to make tons of money, and they certainly work for it. They have plenty of fans and companies willing to support them. It’s not my thing, but I wish them well and continued success.

  14. Kriss says:

    Did she wax her forehead cos I can see some hair.

  15. Dani says:

    Nah, Kaiser. Kris won’t be negotiating contracts for an “old Kim.” She will have moved on the the grandkids by then. I keep waiting for Mason to get his own show.

    We will probably be reading about Mason’s first love any day now. You know they met at the sandbox, he accidentally threw sand in her face, she cried, he comforted her and they fell in love. They were destined soul mates. Yes, that’s about how ridiculous things have gotten.

  16. neelyo says:

    @ jackson, i totally agree. i’ve never understood the interest level in this clan of dead eyed idiots.

    That pic of her and the cocktail looks like an artist’s rendering from an eyewitness account of an alien probing.

  17. Dhavy says:

    These people are nasty
    Who cares about their management! They obviously don’t mind selling their souls for money and attention.
    I wouldn’t waste an hour of my life watching these waxy people

  18. fannomore says:

    I can hear the circus music now

  19. umabrasileira says:

    They get “REAL management”, someone who doesn’t “think it’a a good idea to shill every single thing to E!” and then what, for God’s sake? That’s the only thing they do for a living!

  20. Brittany says:

    If that report on Media Take Out is true… Damn!!!

    ‘Kat-Face’… Man, that is a total insult to cats everywhere. They are so much better looking!

  21. 4Real says:

    “I mean, I would assume it would be…we sell our souls to E!…”

    LOL!! Gotta love KHLOE’s honesty!

  22. Kisha says:

    Are they going to tape the honeymoon too? Oh wait, she already has a sex tape out.

    I just can’t handle this family.

  23. original kate says:

    kim’s face looks like it has been stretched to the max and is held together with a bungee cord at the back of her head.

  24. Ron says:

    Her sex acts have been broadcast, why not her pretending to be a virgin

  25. Tia says:

    I wonder when Reggie is going to freak out.

  26. garvels says:

    I would never had guessed it would be televised. I wonder if they are going to have Cinderella carriages and toy soldiers and everything like Prince William’s wedding to Catherine. Ha Ha.

  27. dorothy says:

    Honestly it kind of sickens me the lengths these people will do for self promotion and money. It’s kind of a sell your soul to the devil for a nickle. It’s just so tacky and cheap.

  28. Monique says:

    It’s the same ring that she wore when she was trying to get reggie to marry her?

  29. Tiffany says:

    I want to cry when I see her. I just think of the picture that showcases the butt implants, the before and after. She was this gorgeous girl with a stunning figure.

    BTW, Khloe is Kirstie Alley’s height and IS probably a size 10/12. This is a bad pic, she usually looks thinner, so draw your own conclusions.

    This family obviously sold their souls to someone to get where they are with no talent. Amazing!

  30. KJ says:

    Of course it’s being televised on E. You think E paid for that ring only to let them have a private ceremony? Please.

    Speaking of which, there’s no way Humphries paid for that ring all by himself. Lamar Odom, Khloe’s husband, got her a ring that cost roughly 900 grand. Lamar, who plays for the Lakers, won 6th man of the year this year, and has multiple championship rings with the Lakers.

    Kris Humphries plays for the Nets, a franchise that is currently one of the worst in the NBA, and is probably going to be moved to Brooklyn at some point. He makes 3mil a year with the Nets, and is not nearly the player (or star for that matter) that Lamar Odom is.

    You’re telling me he bought a 2 million dollar ring? With his own money?

    Yea, ok. E bought the ring, and Kim signed over the rights for her wedding. Not that she wouldn’t have without the ring. She’d sell out even if all you did was take her picture.

  31. Kimbob says:

    Kim K. looked so much better before all the surgery and injections to her face. I hate to say this, but she WAS naturally beautiful…but now…not pretty. She definitely looks jacked. Also, is it just me, but look at Mom’s nose in the first pic. Looks like she got a butcher job by a plastic surgeon.

  32. Tammi says:

    Khloe looks like a waitress.

  33. anne says:

    Her eyes will be where her ears are by the time she’s 40

  34. really says:

    wow, how ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ….who cares!

  35. RHONYC says:

    poor Khloe looks like a cater waiter who’s shirt shrunk in the wash.

    note to Kim: that pursed, open mouth thing makes you look mental.

    jussayin.

    🙁

  36. NaomiCampbellsPhone says:

    I’m just gonna call it now, the next show will be “Kim and Khloe: Basketball wives”

  37. VoiceOfReason says:

    “This woman would televise herself in the bathroom, doing # 2, if that meant she could profit from it.”

    I’d watch that.

  38. Maritza says:

    They are a beautiful family and so what if they are making a living off their reality show and all the frills that come with it? As long as people keep watching they will keep filming. Lucky for them, they are millionaires just for being themselves, I say that is a win win situation.

  39. the original bellaluna says:

    I thought that thing behind their heads in the header said “TAKE BACK YOUR FACE” – HAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Lardassian Kartrashian was filmed receiving a golden shower. Once you’ve jumped that shark, anything else on film just pales in comparison!

  40. Charlotte says:

    I don’t like this family and I absolutely won’t watch their shows, but I just have to say that I find most of them to be really pretty. Kim has messed up her face of course, but if she stops doing whatever she’s doing, she might be fine. She was always really naturally beautiful. But yeah, boo to the rest of this craziness.

  41. fizXgirl314 says:

    “That pic of her and the cocktail looks like an artist’s rendering from an eyewitness account of an alien probing.”

    hahahahaha…

  42. maggie says:

    They all look like mutants.

  43. Monique says:

    kim is a fake using the same ring that she brought, passing it off like kris purchase it.mediatakeout was the frist to report it.

  44. M says:

    Kim looks like she is wearing a space suit in the first pic

  45. Laurie says:

    If it’s not televised, the Kardashians won’t do it! I’m sure Kat-Face thinks she is a princess worthy of the royal wedding treatment (a la the Duke & Duchess of Cambridge). Let me guess…she will keep her dress designer a huge secret until the photos are sold to the highest bidder!

  46. Dea says:

    Wow, she really has ugly hands. She should consider having a plastic surgery on her fingers as they seem deformed.

  47. velourazure says:

    she actually used to be quite beautiful before she started effing up her face.

  48. Ruby says:

    She is such a pretty lady but she screws up with fillers and Botox. This family is all about $$$$$$$ family values

  49. Lia says:

    Send in the clowns….. I would rather watch paint dry than have to sit through this wedding. I read where she thinks her wedding will be even bigger than the recent royal wedding. She is so delusional that it’s scary, and we should probably feel sorry for her. It must be really hard to live in the realm of psychosis.

  50. LunaT says:

    I’m guessing the Kardashian fans who are posting are also fans of Paris? Or the Kardashian’s agents? So, getting a crap ton of plastic surgery, being shallow as eff, and living off your relative’s “fame” b/c she had sex, taped it, and sold it is a “win win”? Truly, drop them off in the real world and they’d be so lost as how to handle themselves b/c they are basically entertainment hookers with an emphasis on hookers. I say that w/no disresptect to real prostitutes.

    I can’t imagine having the lives they have and feeling satisfied at all. Ewwww.

    @OGBellaluna—did Kim really get a golden shower? Plz, tell me she didn’t.

  51. kristen says:

    I think Kris is a little over bareing but the main thing is shes` good mother and Manages them good. I will deffs. watch the wedding hers` will be way better then Kholes` come on Kris humphrey is really hot – cute- lol ok u get the point. so I love the kardashtrians. Not as much as The hiltons` but there fun too watch ! but if they really want ratings they will head with Kourtney K . Scott disck wedding.

  52. kristen says:

    no dissarecpet to Hookers` come on KIM K. Is classier or than an avearge hooker! I mean inless someones` forced into it Im pretty sure thats` labled as unclassy!

  53. Scarlet Vixen says:

    I saw a commercial for the Khloe & Lamar show the other day and it got me to thinking. I’m so sad for these people–When your entire lives are whored out on tv for money and ratings, how do you know ANYTHING in life is genuine? How do you know if your spouse genuinely loves you and means the things they say/do, or if they’re only doing it for the camera? How can Kris Humphries possibly think that Kim is interested in anything other than his fame as an athlete, getting her own show, and making money? Or maybe he just doesn’t care. I don’t know. But it all seems so sad, empty and pathetic. Kourtney saying they’ve sold their souls their souls to E! is pretty telling. What kind of life is that?

  54. the original bellaluna says:

    @ LunaT – OH yes she DID! From RAYJ, no less! EWWW.

    (It was their “personal home video” that got “leaked” and of course she was “devastated.” Until she got her share of the profits and it “katapulted” her to the fore-front of fame-whore history, that is. Before that, she was just Parasite Hilton’s friend/stylist.)

  55. futureperfect says:

    She (or her mother) will be the first to figure out how to implant corporate logos on the face and body. And I’d pay her a billion dollars to disappear permanently. If I had it 🙁

  56. kasper says:

    I bet she will video their wedding night and sell that too. Of course, she will pretend it somehow go into the wrong hands. I hope Kris Humphries knows what he got himself into; he’s always had the reputation of being a bit dim. This b!tch is going to take him for a ride. How long before she gangbangs all his teammates?

  57. MorticiansDoItDeader says:

    @the original Bella, “Kartrashian was filmed receiving a golden shower.”

    That’s what I thought they were going to name her perfume “golden showers.”

    @the original Bella “their “personal home video” that got “leaked”

    LOL. Oh the irony!

  58. the original bellaluna says:

    @ Morticians – Oh yes! It should have been Golden Showers or Fame Whore. And who would want to smell like her anyway?

    What, did she capture “essence of fresh botox” with floral “face fillet” undertones, combined with “essence of lip and ass implants,” finished off with a hearty “eau d’extensions and vanity” hybrid? (Or does that sound more like a bad Kartrashian wine-in-a-box?) 😀

  59. MeMyself says:

    I don’t really know much about the Kardashian’s history.

    Is that bit about the golden shower true?
    Has anyone actually watched that to verify?
    I mean, really, just can’t imagine…

  60. the original bellaluna says:

    @ MeMyself – I don’t watch fame-whore porn, but I have it on good authority that it’s true. A golden shower from RayJ, the singer Brandi’s little brother, who had a show on VH1 (I believe – I also don’t do “reality tv”) called For the Love of RayJ. (I do however, watch The Soup; Joel McHale blasted him mercilessly!)

  61. Michelle says:

    She really needs to keep her mouth shut she looks like a pissed on reject!

  62. anonymoose says:

    “Kat-Face”? Noooooo! ALIENFREAKFACE. Cats are gorgeous elegant creatures. ALIENFREAKFACE is a tacky classless cretin.

  63. Mrs. Odie 2 says:

    I have heard people say the golden shower story is urban legend. None of us has ever seen the video since we’re mostly chicks.

  64. MorticiansDoItDeader says:

    @the original Bella, I think you nailed it! That’s exactly what I think she’d smell like.

  65. LunaT says:

    @OGBellaluna—-ewww, ewww, ewwwwww. I don’t wanna harsh on anyone’s kink, but pee and poop should not be included in sex. Never. Ewwww. And I liked the “leaked”, too. Nice, unintentional touch.

    I don’t think my daughter, now 21 mos, is going to remain my innocent baby forever, but I cannot imagine capitalizing on her fame. Period. Especially if the fame originated from a sex tape. Mama Jenner is such a classy lady. The only thing separating her from Dina Lohan is the ability to afford more plastic surgery.

  66. crtb says:

    This is not a REAL marriage. This is a PR stunt for the two of them to make money. The same as her sister who got married after only knowing her husband for only one month. This is soooo fake!

  67. Zelda says:

    I do not understand how they are famous–does anyone actually LIKE them?

  68. the original bellaluna says:

    @ Mrs. Odie 2 – My BIL has seen it – it’s true.

    @ Morticians – Thanks! 😀 (I forgot the “desperation” but I think it’s implied.)

    @ LunaT – My little one will be 2 on Tuesday! Yeah, Mama “Pimp” Jenner is one “klassy” woman. (And the “leaked” was completely unintentional, believe it or not.)

    @ Zelda – No one except Gaycrest and E! (And whoever is making money off of them at the time.)

  69. Adrien says:

    No way it’s going to be televised. Kim’s such a timid person who hates media attention and publicity. Her family is also low-profile and camera shy, they were once thought to be recluses.

  70. LunaT says:

    @OGBellaluna—I thought leaked was unintentional 🙂 It worked out perfectly!

    Happy bday to your little one. I hope you all have a wonderful day celebrating. I feel like such a cheese saying thing, but, oh, my eff, how did two show up so quickly? My girl hits that mark in September. Already!

  71. the original bellaluna says:

    @ LunaT – Thank you. And I know – time passes faster when you have kids. (MY oldest will be 21 in August!)

  72. kpss says:

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  73. Bill Roberts says:

    These pigs represent everything wrong with American women They are all about how much money they can get out of a guy by being the biggest slut possible. The only thing that can be said for the daughters is they got it, Being a cheap whore, honestly it came straight from their Mom queen whore herself Kriss Jenner