Jodie Marsh has got to be the most unattractive woman in all of England. And I’m not saying that implying that British people are unattractive. But to be the ugliest person in any country – even a really small country or some sparsely populated island – is really saying something. The only way you could look like Jodie Marsh naturally is if you stumbled on a wayward cobblestone street, fell facedown and smashed all of your important facial features on ever angrier cobblestones. That’s the only way a person could justify looking like Jodie Marsh.

I thought she was London’s most famous porn star, but it turns out she’s actually a glamour model. Though she is topless a lot. And since she’s got a face that looks about as attractive as a half-eaten quiche, she’s resorted to other means of getting attention, since she can’t really get much positive press for her face. Things like deciding she’s a lesbian, then walking around with “Give me your sperm” signs. Or what I call a nice Saturday night.

JODIE MARSH wants a baby – just weeks after quitting men. And if you didn’t think the veteran publicity seeker could sink any lower, she’s made an appeal for a sperm donor on national radio. Jodie appeared on TIM SHAW’S show on Absolute Radio, formally known as Virgin Radio, whose guests used to be of a fairly distinguished calibre.

Her on-air antics included snogging her new girlfriend and sucking a banana – standard Marsh stuff, really. Desperate Jodie made the appeal because she’s a lesbian these days, you see. She recently admitting she’s started a relationship with hairdresser NINA.

Jodie said: “I’ve had loads of s**t men. I can see why women turn lesbian, because you get to the point where you’re sick of hearing so much f***ing bull***t, so you start to look elsewhere.”

Indeed, she can now be seen falling out of clubs with poor old Nina on her arm, a pal of 12 years apparently.

If she does succeed at getting hold of some oddball’s sperm, she might need to start staying in.

Hang on, maybe this appeal isn’t such a bad idea…

[From The Sun]

The Sun has several pictures of Jodie holding various signs about needing sperm. Apparently that’s what she thinks lesbians do. Ironically Jodie got in a lot of trouble with gay and lesbian rights organizations last year after she made derogatory remarks about an interviewer who she thought was gay, noting:

On 16 May 2007, Marsh stood atop a giant wedding cake in Leicester Square in London, dressed in a white tutu, with two white belts covering her nipples and carrying a bridal bouquet to promote her upcoming reality series Totally Jodie Marsh.[26] During the appearance, she was interviewed by journalist Jody Thompson who asked her, in addition to other questions, why she accused her one-time Big Brother housemate Chantelle Houghton of marrying for publicity only to do the very same thing. Marsh finished the interview but was filmed walking off stating, “I actually wanted to punch her [Thompson] in the face. Lesbian, blatantly! That short hair! And butch, looks like a man . . . She was a bitch from hell, she was a complete cow.”

[From Wikipedia]

So apparently Jodie Marsh is a big fan of criticizing people for doing the same things she does five minutes later. Of course it wasn’t sexy and attention grabbing for her to be a lesbian in 2007, but now everythng’s changed… i.e. she’s given up on men completely. Or everything but their sperm.

Jodie Marsh is shown out in London on 8/28/08 (vest – Credit Bauergriffin) and on 10/5/08 (pink “dress” – credit WENN)