Sep 26
'06
James Bond switches to beer, gets belly


Daniel Craig got so fat indulging in the local Czech cuisine while filming “Casino Royale” in Prague that producers hired him a trainer to get him back in Bond-shape for the role.

Craig lost two of his teeth while filming, got prickly heat, admitted he didn’t like guns or speedboats, and had to be schooled on how to play poker because he looked like an idiot in his card-playing scenes.

Movie marketers further messed with Bond’s image by cutting a deal with Ford to feature a Ford Mondeo in the film. They were also forced to make Bond’s trademark Aston Martin an automatic when it came out that Craig couldn’t drive a stick.

Now they’re making Bond’s transformation complete by reaching an endorsement deal with Heineken. Bond’s low-carb vodka martinis are going to be supplemented with the everyman’s drink, beer.

The suave hero – played by Daniel Craig, 38, in the next spy thriller Casino Royale – usually sips a vodka martini.

But Dan could well be knocking back the lagers after producers signed a deal with Heineken.

The Dutch brew will feature heavily in the actor’s Bond debut in return for global coverage of the movie in Heineken advertising.

But it may not be enough for new star Craig to win the title of best-ever Bond. A poll by sci-fi mag SFX found Sir Sean Connery, 75, is still the top 007 with fans.

Pierce Brosnan, 53, is second, followed by Roger Moore, 78.

Bond has gone to hell already, so it really doesn’t matter if he starts swilling beer while he’s driving an American car. He could still get naked, which might prove to be the saving grace for this franchise. Now that he’s lost his edge though, do we really care?

Written by Celebitchy

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Posted in Daniel Craig, Photos, Weak


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4 Responses to “James Bond switches to beer, gets belly”

  1. Whomever cast this dodgy bloke is out of their bloody minds. 007 movies are quite literally turning into a parody worse than Austin Powers.

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  2. Celebitchy says:

    Agent, I didn’t know you were British! ;) You’ve got the vernacular down.

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  3. Viv says:

    What the hell? Drinks beer, a little pudgy, doesn’t know how to play poker or drive stick, a Ford, skin problems… sounds like me at 16; doesn’t sound remotely like the hot sexy James Bonds I know.

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  4. Gayle says:

    The rumor about the automatic doesn’t hold water. Daniel Craig can drive stick.

    http://www.usatoday.com/life/columnist/finalword/2006-06-27-final-word_x.htm

    I swear I read this a few months back, and saw the auto/stick and Ford/AM debate killed.

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