Lindsay Lohan decided to celebrate Easter by crack-fighting a random woman and then having her publicist issue a bunch of statements about how LL wasn’t even at that particular club for that particular crack-fight. I’m just assuming that’s what went down, because… well, you know. It’s not like LL is some “innocent” victim who is consistently and grossly maligned. She’s a violent predator. So what happened this time? A woman filed a police report with the West Hollywood Sheriff’s Department claiming that Lindsay assaulted her at The Standard Hotel on Thursday. The woman filed on Saturday, two days after the alleged incident went down.
Lindsay Lohan has been off formal probation for less than two weeks and she’s already being accused of getting into an altercation with a woman in a nightclub earlier this week … TMZ has learned.
According to our sources, a woman filed an incident report ALLEGING BATTERY with the West Hollywood Sheriff’s Department last night. We’re told the woman claims Lindsay got into it with her at a nightclub on Thursday night. She claims Lindsay did not like the fact she was talking to a male friend of LiLo’s … and began pushing and shoving her.
Law enforcement sources say they will investigate the woman’s claims — like they would any other incident like this — to determine their validity.
Lindsay’s rep, Steve Honig, tells TMZ, “Lindsay was absolutely not involved in any sort of altercation whatsoever. This is clearly another case of someone looking for money and 15 minutes of fame.”
[From TMZ]
“This is clearly another case of someone looking for money and 15 minutes of fame.” Just assume that whenever Steve Honig references “someone”, he’s talking about Lindsay and her motivations. I love how this crackheaded famewhore-grifter is always calling out other people for their cracked-out grift. A “source close to Lindsay” also told Radar, “There is just one little problem with this scenario, Lindsay absolutely wasn’t even at The Standard on Thursday night. This entire debacle was completely fabricated and the allegations are totally bogus. Lindsay’s attorneys are LIVID, and when it’s proven that this girl made up these allegations, her a** is grass.” And Honig cried to Radar, “Whomever is responsible for this lie will be held accountable for their misguided actions.”
Team Crack snapped into full-on damage control, running to TMZ as well – “sources close to LiLo” told TMZ that Lindsay didn’t go out Thursday night because she was watching TV – she’s “catching up on Homeland.” Which is depressing, because I love that show and now it’s tainted by crack. Still, I’d like Lindsay to PROVE that she’s watching Homeland. I’d like to give her a quiz on it. Because while I have no problems buying the idea that the Cracken was starting a fight at a nightclub, I simply can’t buy that Lindsay was having a nice, quiet, sober night at home, watching a critically acclaimed television show about counterterrorism.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.
I believe it! LMAO!
unlike Lindsay, I learn from past mistakes 😉
Can’t wait to see how this unfolds.
Her daffy lips say it all, “I am innocent.” Good enough for me, cause frankly I don’t give a damn anymore. (Not that I really ever cared, but it was fun for awhile.) Let’s face it folks Miz Crack-a-lacka has gone boring on us.
HAHAHAHA!!!! “daffy lips”…..I can’t look at her anymore without thinking “duck lips”. She is getting boring but I still can’t help myself when I see a post on her! 🙂
daffy duck lips LOL…I wonder if the woman checked to see if she still had her wallet and necklace, and oh yeah, her coat?
Another day with LiLo in cray cray world
I would believe the denial if it were anyone else.
These court pictures of Lindsey ALWAYS make me think of the women on “Snapped”. The crazy broad who killed her husband for his money, all while wearing a psychotic grin. (and ugly pantsuit)
Did anyone click the link to the Sam Ron video in the last linnocent post?
Sam sounds so nice, bright, educated, articulate…
I couldn’t believe someone like that would ever date Lilo. I was shoked. I watched the whole interview. When she mentioned gawker at end i almost died.
I can see it.
SamRon got more famous by being with her.
Her name was put out when before I never knew who she was.
I am a nobody, so I am sure people in her line of work knew her. But she does not come to my area, so I would NEVER had known of her.
I am sure that SamRon got more money because of the “fame” of being with LiLo.
I found Charlotte first, while looking up female designers. And Charlotte comes as part of a set 🙂 so i found Samantha back when she still wore skirts! (she didn’t wear them often back then either)
So I’ve been aware of the twins since about 2003. And it does seem odd that Samantha, who studied philosophy, history, and creative writing at NYU, was pulled into the cracken’s world.
But remember that somehow crackberry snortcake has also bamboozled the judges and lawyers of the CA legal system, and managed to get herself a number of jobs, however short-lived, even though she has no great acting or singing ability, has a history of items “vanishing” when she’s around, and her looks have been trashed by her lifestyle. Her talent is grifting and hustling.
Samantha is just another victim in the cracken’s path. Too bad the cracken is more focused on this one than on the others.
Here’s a much shorter video, it’s kind of a commercial that she did, but you get a peek at her insane toy collection, and I’m jealous of her jewelry drawer, for like the split second you can see it. And Caddy is so cuuute.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05E7z0KvntA
The music clips in the background are from Sam’s album ofc. In order the songs are Chasing the Reds, Half Awake, and Skyscrapers.
yea go ahead and laugh at me that i even know that *blush* I’m laughing at myself that I was humming along in my head. Yeesh.
Crackberry Snortcake??!! LMAO!!
Kaiser, Linnocent just got a new name!
crackhead.
Hey crackie…welcome to the rest of your life…crack fights and crack denials.
lol
Lindsay Lo-class
“I wasn’t there! Now move that cone”… or I’ll beat you with it?!
Holy frikkity frak. This girl (LINDSAY) is insane.
HA. I guessed she’d be back in the courts in May but she outdid my expectations already. Bitch is addicted to courtroom attention now. And I agree, LL IS a violent predator, not just a has-been joke. Thanks for finally saying it *out loud*.
Tune in tomorrow, Same crack channel, same crack time!!!
LOL Thank you for my first belly laugh of the day.
second that!
Lindsay probably was there. I can’t see her staying away from the bars. She just doesn’t get it.
I don’t know on this one – she says she wasn’t even there – like, all night, not just ‘left 10mins earlier.’ If she was there – let the ubiquitous TMZ video cometh (as they always do). If that happens – sure. If not, well, I am prepared to accept that she’s such a mess that nutty people may try to pin things on her for their nefarious rationales (cue Mr Burns-esque megalomaniacal laughter).
I’m willing to give Lindsay another chance!! LMFAO. How many has she had now ??? lost count
“She claims Lindsay did not like the fact she was talking to a male friend of LiLo’s … and began pushing and shoving her.”
I can just imagine her like “what the fk you doing on my patch bitch, go find your own corner” LOL
cracked out idiot..
Yeah, she wasn’t there. Just like she’s never done drugs, didn’t steal that necklace, didn’t run into people with her car, didn’t clip a baby stroller, didn’t drive drunk, and on and on and on.
Crackie is never going to change until she either really hurts someone and they have to keep her in jail, or she finally keels over.
I think Kaiser is right. Somebody who watches Homeland should give her a quiz about that particular episode. So my vote is for test the Cracken.
I don’t even read these stories anymore, I just scrowl through to look at the terrible pictures of her. Every story is the same:
– Something skeezy/sketchy happens..things that don’t happen to normal, sober, law-abiding citizens
– LiLo denies, denies, denies
– LiLo accuses everyone else, feels bad for herself
– Publicist accuses everyone else
– LiLo goes to court without a bra on
– gets more community service time, no real punishment, and repeats cycle.
Trout-mouth done screwed up! LMFAO!! I can’t help it, I believe every word of this
OMG, how about the best part?! “…and when it’s proven this girl made up these allegations, her ass is grass.” Her ASS IS GRASS?! Seriously?! Lindsay’s close source at Radar is apparently calling from 1985 to spill dish from the future. I bet this source has a mullet and wears lots of neon. They did forget the critical ending, though: ” And I will CUT IT like a lawnmower.” Gnarly!
Hahahaha!
“calling from 1985 to spill dish from the future…”
Thanks for the laugh of the day.
Agree! I ‘ve been giggling about that call from 1985 all morning! 😀
I’ll bet Lindsay’s sources penned the old bumpersticker my brother used to have on his Dodge Challenger: “Ass, Gas, or Grass, Nobody Rides Free!”
In that first picture, I feel like she is looking straight into my soul. I think I just aged 15 years.
hahaha
To bad they didn’t check out the twitters from Thursday night and the photos of her outside the club…timestamped and everything…with her flasher rain coat and red Minnie mouse hooker heels…she pushed the woman because the woman was hitting on one of her clients……
LiLO was working that night…..LOL
Pls pls let there be a vid to prove she was at the club
I totally believe Lindsay would have done this – the crackie hasn’t changed at all…even as a ‘red head’ (still can’t believe people believe that she is reformed coz she gone back to red!!)
She seems so desperate for attention that I wonder if she does all this stuff cause she knows it will make news?
Aren’t there security cameras that could prove she was there?
Oh LiLo for the love of g*d put on a bra, at the rate your gals are sagging the next time some dude asks to see your t*ts you are gonna have to lift up your skirt to show them.
I’ll miss her antics when she ODs 🙁
She wants a part in Homeland now, that’s why she’s watching it. Just like the Elizabeth Taylor movie, taking pics holding a book about her.
“the latest victim to feel the coke-infused wrath of the freckled terror”
This is why I love Michael K
Word Newtsgal. I totally cosign. LiLo is so into herself and staying relevant…even in a negative light…the whole story is probably bogus. It may come out that the victim “thought” it was Lohan and this story will fade away.
But the problem with her making it up is the fact that the Sherrif’s Dept. is involved and gave a statement. I don’t think even Crackie is that stupid, or maybe she is. I would love to see her nailed for making false statements to the cops. She is way overdue for that charge.
i’ve stopped believing in the judicial system thanks to this ho. she’s a menace to society if any of us have ever seen one. narcissistic, thinks she’s above the rules made for the rest of humanity. and anti-social in the psychotic sense of being against societal norms. she could get away with murder
“Lindsay’s attorneys are LIVID”
BULLONEY. Attorneys don’t get livid over stupid crap like this. If anything, their eyes are very tired from all the rolling.
You can’t go anywhere without CCTV. Can’t be hard to prove whether she was there or not in a matter of minutes surely.
She never did it, she wasn’t there, blah blah blah. Same old, same old.
Here’s a thought Linds – why not just keep your idiotic crackass out of the clubs???
If Lohan had any brains at all, she’d stay the hell away from the nightlife entirely.
Just shove her back in jail and throw away the key. Or sentence her to tend to Hef’s every need at the Playboy Mansion. Whichever, I don’t care.
It’s not fun when BOTH Radar and TMZ are on one side. There need to be war between two of them. One is pro-Lohan, one is pro-Lohan victims. So that we all world root for victims on Radar and laugh on TMZ for their ridiculous pro-Lohan lies.
If you wait two days to file an assault charge in LA, the police aren’t going to investigate it. Let’s face it they have real and serious crimes, so unless you were injured and or called the police at the time of the incident absolutely nothing is going to happen with this. Except a law suit that will cost her more money, but nothing legal will happen to Lilo no matter what if this is really how it went down.
In a recent clarification of Lindsay’s status, representative Steve Honig has given another interview, in which he further explains why Lindsay is innocent of this alleged crime:
“I personally know for a fact that at the time she is being accused of this crime, Lindsay was meeting with the pastor of St. Mary’s of Hollywood, reading a Bible while sitting with her legs crossed discussing her vow of abstinance, which she has maintained for at least nine years.”
“She was wearing white as usual while praying in the back pews as she held her rosary made of pure sea jaspar,” continued Mr. Honig. “When she finished, she got together with her beloved manager and mother, Miss Dina, and discussed her future jobs and engagements with the Girl Scouts, the ASPCA, the Promise Keepers, and volunteering to move orange cones for the blind.”
“Occasionally, her virgin sister Ali would slide under the door with a stack of papers from orphanages and foster homes across the world which Lindsay would happily autograph. Once signed, Ali would slide back under the door where she would be folded into an envelope and mailed to the first address on the list to personally hand out each autograph.”
“Of course, the day ended with Miss Lindsay discussing several projects with high-end producers, such as her upcoming portrayal of Mother Teresa as directed by Steven Spielberg.”
“So rest assured that Lindsay did NOT do what she was accused of. You have my word on that!”
Strong words from Mr. Steve Honig. I know I’ll be able to sleep a little better tonight now that I know the truth!
Its Dina calling from 1985!
Oops! That last comment was in response to @Grandizer further up!!
lot of awesome writers in the comments for this one. thanks for the laugh. you all should start your own funny hour.
@ Paulie- thank you!
In other news……. does anyone know when that Lifetime movie is supposedly shooting? Because I thought it was in April. But since crackberry snortcake is still in LA, she’s clearly not in Canada shooting.
Does Lifetime mention movies they are making? Ir is a movie finished before they announce it?
do we have any reason to believe this movie is going to happen?