November 18th marks the second wedding anniversary for Hollywood power couple Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. It’s been a weird two years since the fairy-tale wedding in a castle in Italy. But since then, there’s been a slow, steady backlash in the media against the couple – most of it aimed at Tom Cruise and his “religion” of choice, Scientology. The predominant public opinion is that Katie, once a cute, doe-eyed ingenue with a promising film career, has been sucked into the bizarre world of Scientology at Tom’s insistence – although there has been no confirmation of any of this. Some have even gone so far as to say that Katie is a prisoner of this marriage – and the reason she stays with Cruise is their little girl, Suri.

In the two years since Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes wed in a lavish ceremony in Italy, their marriage has been tested. The couple has been dogged by gossip that their relationship is a sham, forced to defend their belief in Scientology and weathered career pitfalls.

As their November 18 anniversary approaches, Tom and Katie are still together – but it’s not all wedded bliss. “Life with Tom is not what Katie thought it would be,” a friend reveals. “Had they just dated a couple of years, I think they would have split up by now.”

Says another pal, “Their relationship is not perfect.”

According to an insider, there’s one big reason Tom and Katie have persevered: their daughter. “She puts up with a lot for Suri’s sake,” the friend explains.

Katie, who is temporarily living in New York to star in the Broadway show All My Sons, spends every free moment with Suri, 2. The two have been spotted playing together in the city’s parks, and on November 5, she took Suri for pizza at Pie by the Pound in the East Village. “She looked so happy,” a witness tells In Touch.

But it was a complete reversal a week earlier, when she dined with Tom alone at Balthazar restaurant in SoHo. “Her face said it all,” an insider revealed. “Katie looked miserable with him. Her smile was really forced.”

Tom, 46, and Katie, 29, weren’t always so incompatible.

“They rushed into the relationship,” a friend explains. “Katie got swept up in it. She thought she loved him.”

But the honeymoon was short-lived. When the reality of being Mrs. Tom Cruise set in, Katie felt controlled by Tom – and Scientology.

[From In Touch print version, Nov. 24, 2008]

While I think this story is a bit melodramatic and very circumstantial in nature – she was smiling with Suri and less so with Tom a week earlier, so what? – it sure is compelling with you look at those older photos of Katie from two years ago and compare them to Katie today. No marriage is perfect, and expecting perfection for Tom and Katie is unrealistic. But looking back at the old photos, it seems like this union is far from perfect or even normal. Katie seems to have aged ten years. While having a baby definitely takes its toll on any new mom, the change is so dramatic, it really makes you wonder what’s been going on behind closed doors. Maybe it’s as simple as Katie, as a young woman, struggling to find her identity as a more mature actress and mother. Or maybe it’s something darker. We’ll probably never know- or we’ll have to wait a long time to find out, like with Tom’s last wife, Nicole Kidman, who only recently started giving vague clues about what life is really like with the star.

In any case, I hope the couple makes some alone time for each other to celebrate their anniversary – no Suri, no Scientology, no paparazzi, no red carpets; just a romantic night for the two of them.

Here are photos of Tom and Katie throughout their relationship.