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Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake walked their first red carpet as an engaged couple at the Met Gala. I’ve been trying to think about all of the insults I could hurl at them, but honestly, I think they’re both doing pretty good for who and what they are. Do I wish Jessica Biel would stop trying to make these “shaggy dog” bangs happen? Yep. Do I wish her hem wasn’t so confusing? Yep. Do I wish that Justin had given Jessica a prettier engagement ring? Yes. Do I think Justin is smug and full of it? Of course. But for what they are – an attractive couple who fancy themselves “fashion royalty” while consistently missing the mark – they’re okay.
Jessica’s dress is Prada. I actually kind of like it. Right? It’s simple – perhaps too simple for the event, but it flatters her figure, and I kind of love the bejeweled pattern. I like how she put together her look too – the lime green Prada clutch and the pink shoes are lovely with the dress. Basically, my only problem is with those God-awful bangs. Can you feel my eye twitching? Bangs like this always make me twitchy. Rose Byrne was doing a very similar hairstyle throughout this year’s awards season… so not only does Biel look awful, she’s not even ORIGINALLY awful.
As for Justin… eh. Meh. I don’t get why girls are on his jock, ever. But I’m glad that he and Jessica did the red carpet together. That’s a nice move.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Fashion, Jessica Biel, Justin Timberlake, Met Gala

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That color is not for her.
The cut is great, but it looks like she hemmed it the car with a stapler.
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Aw, bea, you just reminded me of High School drama class!
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I’ve stapled many outfits in the car – it works!
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agreed, that hemline looks terrible, and its an awkward length! she looks like a missionary or something. this whole look ages her like 10 years. super nice butt though!
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I was just going to say.
She also needs to take about more 4 inches off the length.
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This was a freakin’ GALA… If this isn’t the time to get crazy with big beautiful couture, WTF is going on with these women? That’s not even “tea length.” What a mess. And I hate Gwyneth’s short dress with her boobs hanging out the sides. Not classy.
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I was thinking the exact same thing; an amateurish hem. I don’t like the shoes with that dress at all. Whimsical, I guess, but would green shoes have been too much? I still don’t consider this girl any beauty. There is something about her teeth and cheeks that suggest either her teeth are too big for her face, or she has too many of them. Very horsey-looking, if you ask me. And her ego is a turn-off
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I don’t even think it is hemmed. It looks pinned.
She looks pretty but that’s the best she can do for the Met Ball? Seriously?
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Met ball? That’s the best she could do when wearing a outfit? I wouldn’t go to work with that hem.
Seriously-what was her stylist thinking? It totally looks like it is held up with badly placed hemming tape.
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The hemline looks like it’s being held up with packing tape. Hideous. So is the ring, and I never found him attractive either.
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Looks like stevie wonder sewed the hem and the more bangs the better she looks, less face that way
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I think she could be preggers like that blind item said. The picture from the side looks suspicious.
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I want to sit on Jessica’s ass
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I want to pat it and stroke it. Male or female Idgaf, I love me a well-formed ass.
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Love it
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The dress is pretty, but DEM BANGS. Holy mother of God, no.
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Hate the bangs. Is she wearing a butt pad? I’ve never understood why she is remotely famous.
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In the third from last pic, when she juts out her butt for the profile pic – that is definitely not a normal, natural female silhouette, especially for a girl that slim. So I believe, too, that she’s wearing butt pads.
As to the hair – explain to me why would you choose such gorgeous, elaborate earrings, and then cover them up with this hair style? They are almost completely invisible – but for that split second in that one pic.
Why ever bother? Also, that hair does nothing for her face and body type. It actually shortens her, makes her look more stubby which she definitely isn’t. All in all – a total miss for me.
And just HATE those pink satin shoes with the dress…
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Meh, she’s always had a prominent, nice butt. People don’t talk about it much because she’s boring, and sometimes people forget to check for white girl booty. I don’t keep close enough tabs on her to know whether all that’s hers though.
I don’t think it looks “unnatural” — even if JB’s wearing butt pads (which I would not put past her), I definitely know people with butts like that at her size/frame (she’s slim, but not even close to a skeleton). I’m around her size, and my butt is only a bit smaller (or maybe we’re the same with her butt pads lol).
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Her butt has always looked like that. I remember someone making comments about it during the illusionist. She claims it’s from the german side of her family
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I think she wears butt pads I’ve seen candids her ass isn’t that big in jeans. She was chubbier when she did the Illusionist but she is pretty thin now there is no way it’s that big.
I also saw their interview on the red carpet these pictures are flattering their have no chemistry and Justin barely looked at her while she kept staring at him.
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I like the dress, but not for this event.
why wear big earrings if you wear your hair like a curtain?
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She will forever be an idiot in my book for letting go of Chris Evans. He is a 1000x better than Timberdouche.
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IA, Chris Evans is hot. He doesn’t seem to be big into publicity though, Mr Evans. So I can see how that’d be a problem for Ms Biel.
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Lucky Chris he got away!!
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Chris Evans cheated in her though just like Justin, so she traded up to an Alist celebrity who cheats on her but keeps her relevant.
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I agree that Chris is the lucky one. As far as Justin being A-list, I wonder how long that will last. Has he done anything of note lately? The movies he has lined up, he is not headlining and I really only see him as A-list in name only now. I don’t know…once A-list, always A-list?
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Most of his movies have done well except one in the last two years they weren’t blockbuster smashs but decent enough that he’s still being afford movie roles and being considered for them. He has a better acting career than her at this point and he is a-list in name and status the only reason they get invited to these events is because of him. The two of them together isn’t that big of a deal they’re not one of hollywoods List couples. Jessica is only a list by association.
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Her hair is making me itch. Dress is very pretty though.
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Most of his movies have done well except one in the last two years they weren’t blockbuster smashs but decent enough that he’s still being afford movie roles and being considered for them. He has a better acting career than her at this point and he is a-list in name and status the only reason they get invited to these events is because of him. The two of them together isn’t that big of a deal they’re not one of hollywoods List couples. Jessica is only a list by association.
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I didn’t mean to reply to this comment meant to reply to
The one above.
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I like the dress but the hem was busted. Her bangs are horrible. Whoever told her that was a good look for her needs to be fired. It makes her mouth look more horse-like but I’m glad she wore lipstick so she didn’t look like a dead body lying at the morgue.
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it’s not nice at all. It looks like a beachdress. cheap and inappropriate for the event
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She needs a new haircut and a new stylist, she also needs to dump Timberdouche.
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The dress is ok, would’ve liked it more if she had either gone shorter or full length. Hate those bangs on her. Her ass, however, is amazing!
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Pretty, for once.
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I like the dress, but wtf did they do to the hem? Those bangs though…. AWFUL!!!!
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I like the dress on her but the hemline needed ironing. Her bangs are to long.
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Great body, but she looks like Michael Jackson in the face. JT on the other hand, is a douche.
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The only thing she needs to improve this look is a different haircut, different dress and a different boyfriend. Nods sagely.
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I really like the dress, i really hate the hair.
Poor Jessica… I watched the guy from Vogue interview them on the live stream and it was all about questions for and trying to be clever answers from Justin. Jessica had to insert herself into the interview and then was finally asked a question.
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She seems like a nice girl, but boooooring. I look at her and all I see is BEIGE.
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Timberdouce could not even shave.There are some men (he is not one,yeah I said it) who have the know how and swagger to pull off a proper, trimmed beard. He just looks sloppy and unkempt and should be ashamed to leave the house looking like that. Dude, you are a multi millionaire, take some pride.
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I love the dress-but the fit is awful. Not only does the hem look like it was stapled-kudos to bea!, but it’s too tight around the upper thighs and rear-it’s pooking up. And I’m not going to even get into those bangs, and both of their smug expressions.
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There is nothing feminine, even with the butt pads, about her…which is probably why Evans dumped her and JT is all over it!
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Awful from top to bottom. What the hell is she thinking.
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I don’t understand why she poses with her butt sticking out like that if she knew how stupid she looked she would probably stop. Their interview was so awkward and they were just awkward in motion as well they didn’t just look like a couple.
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The dress is awful; the bangs are awful, the shoes are awful.
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That dress is ill-fitted & she just looks unfinished. I couldn’t bother to look at her icky fiance’.
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With hair like that I can only think she is trying to hide away?
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What the? She is beautiful, but that hair makes her ugly.
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The hem was poorly done. I don’t much care for her earrings (from what I can see of them) but if she wanted to wear them then she should have at least wore her hair in a loose bun to show them off.
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Did she just step off the set of Hart of Dixie? Fail hair. Love the dress…on Don Draper’s wife that is. Not on her.
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It never fails to amaze me how incredibly uncomfortable and unhappy those two look together. I actually felt uncomfortable myself watching the livestream last night. I don’t like either of them, but I wish Jessica would just get out and run far away from this mess.
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She looks terrible from that Janet from Three’s Company hairdo to that dowdy cut and color of that dress.
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Miss, miss, miss, miss, miss
jessica is a lovely woman but the hair, oh THE HAIR is awful. Get rid of the fringe you do NOT have the face for it.
She looks like she is dressed for supper at the country club NOT the met gala.
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DEAD @ the pose-hardness of her ring-hand!!!!
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I’m in the minority but I really like her ring I think it’s nice I saw a picture of it close and it’s very detailed it’s nice considering how quickly they got engaged after they got back together. I also think her dress would be nicer if it were longer or a few inches shorter and she would have looked better with her hair pulled up in a bun or some type of up do and her bangs swept to the side. She looks older than her age I dont find her to particularily pretty or stunning but she looks better than she normally looks. Justin well a suit well but his hair cut and facial hair are awful he’s someone who looks better with minimal or no facial hair at all it ages him too much.
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I feel like her dress would have been prettier and more appropriate if it had gone all the way to the floor and pooled a bit around her feet.
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For some reason those horrid bangs makes her mouth and teeth look bigger. I have never seen Jessica act in anything but I do remember in the early 2000s she was beautiful. She had a really strong, lean body and gorgeous skin. She seemed so athletic. She looks really weak and boring now.
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That hairdo really brings out her choppers.
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I hate to say this- but I will anyway… She looks like she could be his Mother. She just looks way more mature than he
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I agree with this I think it has to do with the fact that she has a mature face she has always looked older than her age when she was on 7th heaventh she played the oldest sister although she was actually younger than the actress who played Lucy and just the way she carries herself in general she just comes across as older. That’s why I think they’re such a weird pairing she always seems serious and stoic and he’s like the complete opposite of that.
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What is with this celebrities and the butt pose it look really trashy posing like that she is a beautiful woman but the bangs not a good look for her.
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She needs to trim her bangs. I do not like that dress.
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Bangs trauma! Just say “NO” to the dress. I think the earrings would be beautiful, if I could see all of them.
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Those bangs add about ten years to her face. And those pink shoes look cheap.
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Completely awful- to both of them.
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This is the kind of dress one would wear if you were going out to dinner,but it is no way near fancy enough to wear to the Met Gala.
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the bangs…reminded me of the flinstones new neighbor what’s her name Creepella
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She’s very confused about who she is. Every photo I’ve ever seen of her screams this loud & clear.
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Those bangs… just no.
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Wig?
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