Long ago it became impossible to shock anyone over anything Michael Jackson did. You could tell me he ate a live hedgehog and I would not even raise an eyebrow. In fact that’d be one of the less bizarre things the guy could be accused of. Given that, few of the details about Jackson’s most recent lawsuit are all that bizarre. Like getting the son of Bahrain’s king to fork over $343,000 for sessions with a motivational brain mapping consultant. At $37,000 a pop. Jacko was trying to get his creative juices flowing, and apparently nothing makes him feel more creative than spending other people’s money.

He’s also trying to get out of going to London to testify in the $7 million lawsuit filed by the sheikh, claiming another one of his mysterious medical conditions makes it dangerous for him to travel.

A sheikh subsidizing Michael Jackson spent almost $350,000 on a brain-power guru to help the singer’s creative juices flow. “Mind-mapping and motivational guru” Tony Buzan came to Bahrain for a week at the singer’s request, said Bankim Thanki, lawyer for Sheikh Abdulla bin Hamad al-Khalifa, who is suing Jackson for $7 million in a breach-of-contract case here. Buzan “did not come cheap,” he noted in court today: Buzan charged $37,000 a session for a total of $343,000. “Who paid for that? Yes, Sheikh Abdulla,” said Thanki.

Thanki wants to put the 50-year-old Jackson on the stand but the singer wants to testify via video link from Los Angeles. Jackson’s lawyer Robert Englehart told Justice Nigel Sweeney the singer is unable to travel because of an unnamed medical condition. “It would be unwise for him to travel given what he’s got now,” Englehart said. Thanki said the sheikh was “skeptical” of Jackson’s claim that he’s ill. “It’s not the first time a sick note has been presented by Mr. Jackson,” the lawyer sniped, noting Jacko deferred testifying in a 2002 U.S. court case because of an alleged spider bite on his leg.

[From the Daily News]

Okay that spider bite thing was totally legit. Everyone knows you can’t testify when you have an itch on your leg. I can’t believe that lawyer had the nerve to call Jacko out on that. Jerk.

Michael’s been sued hundreds of times. That’s not an exaggeration to prove a point, he really has. I doubt he cares about this one much more than any of the others. From most accounts he’s in financial ruin, so I’m not sure what makes the sheikh think he can get $7 million out of him. There are a lot of people vying for Jacko’s remaining assets.

It’s hard to guess if Michael intentionally used the sheikh or if he’s just so mentally unstable that he thought what he was doing was fine. Either way, he clearly owes the man some serious money. And a musical.

Here’s Jackson in LA to see a dermatologist on October 23rd. Images thanks to Fame.