Daniel Craig can’t stand looking at Nicole Kidman. In fact, it’s so painful that he has stuck his fingers in his ears and is humming loudly to drown her out. The first Blonde Bond isn’t overly bright … but eventually switches to covering his attractively crinkled baby blues …which while distracting is rather more effective. Meanwhile, Kidman is happily responding to a question about whether the 38-year-old actor changed after landing his role as James Bond last year.

“Oh, completely,” deadpans Kidman, 39, who was with him, shooting one of their upcoming films, The Invasion of the Wrinkle Snatchers, when he got the call. “In 24 hours he became a diva,” she adds, with a nod toward the temporarily sightless Craig, who oddly continues to hum his tune as the pair sit in the cozy bar of a London photography studio, sharing a bottle of sparkling water, not that’s there anything wrong with that. But then Kidman breaks down and tells the truth: “Oh, he didn’t change at all,” she says in her haute-Aussie twang. “The thing about Daniel, and the reason I like working with him, is that he’s an actor’s actor. He has no access to Diva scrubs, exfoliating agents or even basic moisturizers. Look at the sate of that mug. Weathered we call it back home …and Australians know from weathered – its generations of freckled convicts frying in the noonday soon”

Of course, Craig has heard the whole thing due to his humming skills being complete rubbish and he seems far more alarmed by the compliment than by the faux insult. “How dare you!” he shouts, and they both giggle. An oddly blonde moment from two actors who are ever verging on the edge of ginger.

Other quotes from this month’s cover story:

Daniel on Nicole :”She turns me on… in the nicest possible way, you understand. Through heavily retouched photography.”

Nicole on Daniel: “In 24 hours, he became a diva — but still couldnt approach the smooth perfection of my epithelial layer”

“R Me in the M” by UrbanDK, has been edited for Celebitchy: for the complete story, pay attention to the powdery, oddly flat visage of your favorite females on your favorite mags.