The Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator: the best or the worst thing ever?

A big part of Benedict Cumberbatch’s charm is the name “Benedict Cumberbatch”. When so many actors take on ridiculous stage names, it’s wonderful that Benedict Cumberbatch didn’t become Ben Thunder or Benny Danger or Carl Cockburn or B.C. Wilde. Benedict thought, “No, I’ll own this, my talent is enough to make my absurd name into a positive.” And it’s true. While no one would CHOOSE the name “Benedict Cumberbatch,” it’s made him stand out from the wide array of frankly interchangeable Chrises, Toms and Taylors. It also makes him so identifiably ENGLISH, which is a positive when you’re finding work all over the place, from Hollywood to British TV to the theater.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, you too can have a name like Benedict Cumberbatch. Some wonderful, brilliant Cumberbitch has made the “Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator”. And it is my new favorite thing in the world. Some of the best names thus far? Bombadil Cankersore, Buttercup Cragglethatch, Beezlebub Gigglesnort, Rumblesack Clavichord, Boilerdang Concubine. This is genius. GO HERE to find your Cumbername.

Two more smaller Cumberbatch stories – one, you can see some new photos of Benedict and Martin Freeman filming Sherlock scenes here at the Mail. Two, you know how Benedict is going to be working on The Imitation Game shortly (probably as soon as he finishes Sherlock)? Well, Downton Abbey’s Allen Leech (the Irish driver turned widower) has joined the cast. Considering all of the sh-t Benedict has talked about Downton, it continues to be amusing how many times he’s cast opposite Downton actors. He worked with Dan Stevens in The Fifth Estate too!

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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113 Responses to “The Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator: the best or the worst thing ever?”

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  1. Samigirl says:

    I present to you all…..

    Bonaparte Cameltoe.

  2. TheOriginalWaffle says:

    To be fair, Cumby really talks against Julian Fellowes, not the actors.

    • Anna says:

      The entire Brit acting community is so incestuous, any single stage/tv/film actor is a max 2 degrees of separation from any other actor. It would be impossible to avoid anyone you ever said sh*t about.

      • Sixer says:

        Anna is entirely correct.

      • Green Girl says:

        I agree with Anna. It seems like there are quite a few British actors who show up in *everything* on both sides of the pond. If you insult a show like Downton, then aren’t you insulting the cast and everyone associated with it, even if Cumberbatch’s comments were directed at Fellowes?

        (As an aside – isn’t Fellowes a long-time friend of his folks? While I get his point, it seems like a pretty rude thing to say to a family friend, KWIM?)

      • MBP says:

        Yup. The more Tv I watch, the more it turns into “hey, it’s that guy, what was it he was in?”.

    • Ginger says:

      Fellowes is a family friend; Cumby has known him since he was a child.

      • Janey says:

        I think that’s anothere reason why people thought it was rude – you’re talking shit about a rival(ish) show and you’re friends with a lot of the cast and the creator – it was a fine example of bitchybatch.

      • Tish says:

        A lot of people talk shit about Fellowes. I remember Irons has said snottier remarks about Fellowes and his writng. And Cumberbatch actually sat with Fellowes when they were at the Globes. I’m sure it’s nothing in the end. I bet he hates Dan Stevens more. Haha!

        There were even subtle jabs from Stoppard himself when they were promoting PE. Haha. And both admitted that they’re friends.

      • Sixer says:

        The thing is, Fellowes is perfectly well aware of what he has created with Downton. He knows it’s camp. He knows it’s a soap opera. He knows it isn’t very good in terms of properly serious drama. But he doesn’t care. People consume it and enjoy it. It’s very successful. It’s made him a great deal of money. He’s big enough, bad enough, ugly enough and tongue-in-cheek enough not to mind criticism in the slightest. I doubt anything Benny the Bitch says would do more than amuse him. It wouldn’t spoil a friendship.

  3. GeeMoney says:

    Too funny. Love him!

  4. cr says:

    Honkytonk Splishnsplash

  5. Lindy79 says:

    I love that they’ve used his Dr. Seuss face from Star Trek on the site.

    I now have a name for my first born:
    Rinkydink Curdlesnoot

  6. Agnes says:

    I think the best one is Butawhiteboy Cantbekhan 😀

  7. T.Fanty says:

    To be fair, he’s right about Downton Abbey.

    And I cannot wait to say goodbye to Sherlock hair. CUT IT OFF, CUMBY!!!

    All the genearated names sound like Roald Dahl characters.

    • Anna says:

      NOOOOO That Sherlock mane is my favorite! Really brings out his cheekbones.

      • T.Fanty says:

        It’s fine when it’s gelled into submission, Sherlock-style. But for the most part, he just looks like a Bijou poodle.

      • Anna says:

        And I could pet him all day long. I love those locks. They can run wild with me.

      • T.Fanty says:

        *side eye*

        Steady on now. Don’t make me invoke my inner Eve and get all shanky. Don’t you have a can of lager to be going down on (or something)?

        By the way, for the record, I got Wanda’s Crotchfruit. Seriously. I think it’s a sign.

      • Anna says:

        I’ll take a keg, please 🙂

        And really my affection for Cumby is warm but mild, he doesnt even make my 5 list – Eve (or you) has nothing to worry about.

    • Sixer says:

      He’s completely right about Downton. It pains me that this is the hit British TV show stateside. If I were the emotional type, I’d cry bitter tears of transatlantic gloom. Here is a Comic Relief parody sketch to make Benny the Bitch snort:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5dMlXentLw

      I thought the names were Potteresque, or even LotR. Not very posh Brit at all. Where are the Tarquins? The Fortescue-Smythes? Even the Hyacinth Buckets?

      Cumby Name Generator? Meh.

      • T.Fanty says:

        I’m in the library now, so I can’t watch it. On a Comic Relief note, however, I will donate my life savings to Comic Relief if they can talk Cumby and Freeman into dressing up as Raw Sex and singing the French and Saunders theme song this year.

      • Sixer says:

        If you get a chance later, do watch. The scene change mockery is hilarious.

        If anyone could do it, Comic Relief could. My favourite ever sketch was the love affair between James Corden and David Beckham (even though I like neither). They cried at Scott and Charlene’s wedding and arranged roses. Wearing towel turbans.

        Oh, perhaps it was Johnny Depp and Dawn French?

      • Amelia says:

        Thank you so much for that link.
        Anything with Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley is by default, brilliant.
        As we’re on the topic of Comic Relief sketches and Hyacinth Bucket, I’d run down my street naked if Hiddles and Cumby did a send-up of Keeping Up Appearances.
        Or ‘Allo ‘Allo.

      • Maureen says:

        LOVE Saunders and Lumley. Thanks for the link. Tea’s made! Milk maid!

      • Sixer says:

        Who would star in the Comic Relief send up of I’m Too Sexy (Right Said Fred)?

        Here’s Beckham and Corden:

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=po1rRYksoX4

        Here’s Depp and French:

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z28WhPbG3CI

      • Lindy79 says:

        That’s brilliant!
        Bates getting knocked to the floor *snort*

        I loved this one (it loses some points for having Bieber in it)
        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdg7Tgv5lo0

      • T.Fanty says:

        Just coming back to spray my tea in delight at Amelia’s suggestion. If they do Allo Allo, I want to play Michelle, the slutty waitress. I could see Hiddles playing the German.

      • ds says:

        Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley!!
        @T.Fanty: they need to do Allo Allo what a classic!

      • Tish says:

        David Mitchell about Downton is still my favorite http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b87E3kamWOg

      • Sixer says:

        Oh that’s priceless! “Is it like drugs?”

    • Miss Jupitero says:

      Snozzleberry is straight put of My Uncle Oswald and means something quite nasty.

  8. Claireb says:

    BOUILLABAISSE RIVENDELL ! !

  9. tizzyfizzy says:

    Yeah, but, aren’t like all of the Brit actors somehow connected? I keep hearing people say that the UK acting scene is pretty tight knit and everyone knows everyone… so, it stands to reason BC has probably already crossed paths with most (some?) of the Downton cast at one point or another- and my goodness, I hope they gave him crap. Seems like he can handle a good joke either way.

    Also: Tiddlywomp Cabbagepatch

    • MissMary says:

      A running joke is there’s only 12 British actors and you have to wait for one of them to die before you can move up the ranks to become one.

    • Tish says:

      Have you guys seen the behind the scene photo of Lord Grantham, Bates and Cumbz at the nomination party at last year’s Emmys? Cumbz sure has a bitchy side but I think he’s close to being universally adored by the UK acting communtiy maybe except the working class actors who have serious vendettas to the posh blokes. Haha. Seriously though, like when you se photos from events he’s like close to everyone. Haha!

  10. MeowuiRose says:

    He talked sh*t about Downton? What did he say!?!

    • Maureen says:

      That the show is ridiculous (I happen to agree, haha). I swear, I think he says some things as conversational asides and naively trusts that the interviewer won’t publish them. But of course they always do. That’s what they do, Benediiiiict.

      • MeowuiRose says:

        Oh…sadness. I enjoy it for the overly dramatic soap opera it is. It did start to wear a little thin on me towards the end of the last season.

      • Andrew says:

        Eh my thought with TV shows is just to let people who like them watch them. My sis loves downtown abbey (not obsessed) while personally don’t. I do respect that it’s well done and well made though. So everyone to their own with TV shows, unless it’s horrendous like Kris Jenners talk show or some attention shoring reality show that’s on only for cash grabs

      • Maureen says:

        @ Andrew

        I totally agree! I gave it try, not my cup of tea, but it’s got some great talent in it and some of my best friends love it. I’m more of a Walking Dead girl myself. But I want to see Benedict in Parade’s End. I can do Brit period drama!

  11. Maria says:

    Syphilis Cankersore

    ewww.

    but Wimbledon Tennismatch is a fine name for an english gentleman.

  12. Cahend says:

    Billiardball Chowderpants!?! I feel like that’s the code name Lindsay Lohan’s dealer uses for her…

  13. Chicagogurl says:

    Liverswort Wafflesmack

  14. Isabel says:

    Benadryl Claritin

    I sound like a drug. Maybe I should dress up as Blohan.

  15. drea says:

    Honkytonk Cumbercooch! Since he doesn’t want his fans calling themselves Cumberbitches (whatever, get off your high horse, Ben), maybe I can just call myself a Cumbercooch.

  16. Mia 4S says:

    Stand aside peasants for Lady Fragglerock Humperdink!
    🙂

    Oh and insanely excited for Sherlock, he was right about Downton, he should be more tactful, etc.

  17. Maureen says:

    I was sitting here a couple hours ago reading the blog and sipping my morning tea and LITERALLY wondered “Will we get a Benedict post today? We didn’t get one yesterday.” And here he is.

    That is all. 🙂

    Oh, but not all: Rinkydink Cottagecheese. I THINK I GOT THE BEST ONE!!!

  18. Melissa says:

    Beezlebub Cumbersnatch!

  19. mia girl says:

    My name in the Queen’s Cumberbatchian is…

    Bumblebee Ballsacksnip

    Am I clearly meant to be a urologist who performs posh vasectomies.

  20. Allijo says:

    HA!! Honkytonk Upperclass.

    A walking class contradiction just like our beloved B.

  21. Nanea says:

    Brandenburg Clavichord.

    Which is funny, because I really like Bach’s Brandenburg Concertos. Other than the initials it’s not very cumberbitchy at all though.

  22. judyjudy says:

    Honkytonk Snugglesnatch.

    Awesome.

  23. Julia says:

    Say goodbye to that sherlock hair ladies. It won’t surprise me if it’s gone by the very beginning of September *whimpers* This is the last week this show is filming. He will soon be shooting that Turing movie. I will miss the hair because we won’t see it for a longgggg time.

  24. CocoaPuffs says:

    Bandicoot Ballsacksnip…I think I found my pr0n name.

  25. icepop says:

    Although I think this story isn’t even worth blogging about, it is funny. But I’m kinda over the names people give this dude. He has a totally British name. Who cares. I’ve heard worst names. It’s like beating a dead horse.

  26. ds says:

    Burberry Upperclass! That sounds so over the top posh and snobbish I actually like it.

  27. greenmonster says:

    I sound like new Muppet: Bedlington Toodlesnoot. And therefore I love it!

  28. Tammy says:

    I thought he already cleared up the Downton Fiasco last year and set the record straight. Even Elizabeth McGovern had concerns about series 2.

    Anyway I do like the show but I do feel like it’s over recognized. I cannot tell you how many Brits I talk to who hate this show. I thought it was beloved the most in it’s own country. Then someone told me to think about the fact that the BAFTAs have never given it much love but the Emmys keep spoiling the show.

    • Sixer says:

      My mother would say, “It’s ITV, dear, what do you expect?” (Downton’s shown on what many people, including my mother, see as a lowbrow channel). That it gets Emmys is a source of much mockery.

      Seriously, it gets huge viewing figures but I think it must be a guilty pleasure for most. The only people I know who admit to watching it are old ladies.

  29. Ginger says:

    Say hello to Boobytrap Snickersbar!

    Here are some new #setlock pics for y’all. Enjoy.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2403932/Benedict-Cumberbatch-gets-little-touch-filming-Sherlock-season-3.html

  30. Adrien says:

    AS per Eddie Izzard, this is how Gerry Dorsey got his stagename.
    “Zingelbert Bembledack, Tringelbert Wangledack,… Engelbert Humptyback, … Engelbert Humperdinck, Benedict Cumberbatch,Vingelbert Wingledanck”.

  31. Colleen says:

    Honkytonk Frumblesnatch

  32. Lio says:

    Blubberwhale Crumplehorn! I nearly snorted coffee onto my keyboard, lol

  33. lady mary. says:

    good lord ,iam ehm ehm, HAIRYBALLS CUCKATOO,(thud !!!,crashes on the floor)

  34. Kimmie says:

    Ladies, don’t forget Englebert Humperdinck; he was there first!

  35. Felice says:

    It bothers me that people compare Parade’s End to DA. They’re entirely different shows besides being in the Edwardian era…

  36. Sal says:

    Hairycooch Cuttlefish

    :O O.o

    I tried another one. Bendydick Cottagecheese

    Bendy dick cottagecheese? 😀

    This one is even ruder: Bendydick Creamsicle

    Oh, I love my bendydick creamsicles…… 😀 Just don’t like the salty ones.

  37. Naomi says:

    I waited all day to try this because I was absolutely certain the name chosen would suck. Henceforth I shall be hailed as:

    Biblical Concubine!

    That soooo doesn’t suck! Lol!!!!

  38. Susei says:

    Boilerdang Curdledmilk

    Bunsenburner Moldyspore

    WTF

  39. LaurieH says:

    Signs That You’re Getting Old #73: you have no earthly idea who Benedict Cumberbatch is.

  40. CA says:

    My name turned out to be Biblical Concubine.

  41. Str8Shooter says:

    WHAT is this unbelievable obsession that you have with talking about this guy??

    I swear not a day goes by where there are not multiple postings on this fop-haired, homely guy who’s only claim to fame so far as I can tell is being in Dr. Who and a small part in the latest Star Trek.

    Please! Are there ANY other celebs you could post about for a change?

    • Abby says:

      Get your facts right that he played Sherlock and NOT Doctor Who. Also he has quite a big scene time considering he was the villain and not the main actor.

      If you hate him so much why the effing hell do you even click on his posts.

      • Str8Shooter says:

        Wow, you seem very angry. Are you off your meds again?

        You DO realize that people can share opinion’s other than yours, no?

        Ah..you probably haven’t gotten that far in anger management therapy yet cupcake!

    • Lindy79 says:

      Em, I see at least another 10 stories posted yesterday that don’t include him…

    • Trashaddict says:

      Sure as hell beats Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber. He may not be pretty in the traditional sense but at least he’s applying his talent and not embarrassing himself with infantile behavior. Don’t worry, there are lots of other gossip sites if you get bored with Cumbyland.

  42. Maria says:

    Snorkeldink Cumbercooch
    Oh dear, this one’s got a double meaning, me thinks!

  43. AH says:

    Wanda’s Crotchfruit.

    I think it would be better without the apostrophe (that makes no sense, right?) but I am definitely going to find use for the term ‘Crotchfruit’.

  44. Side-Eye says:

    Broccoli Charizard…

  45. Naomi says:

    Hairyballs Cunningsnatch.

  46. Tish says:

    Britishguy Sillyname is still my favorite.

  47. Sandra says:

    Snozzlebert Cuttlefish

  48. Zgrom says:

    Wimbledon Clombyclomp here!
    ahaha how posh

  49. operagirl says:

    These are all too fun!

    I got Danglerack Scratchnsniff …

  50. raincoaster says:

    I’m Boobytrap Covergirl on that generator, so what’s not to love?

  51. Red says:

    so awesome. Benadryl Claritin