Gwyneth Paltrow deigns to solicit your thoughts on the wonder that is Goop

Did you realize that Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop has been around for five years? Time flies. She started Goop around the same time that I started here at Celebitchy. Coincidence?! In this week’s Goop-letter, Gwyneth thanks all of her Goop-fans for hanging out, but mostly she’s just bragging about how awesome she is and how Goop has changed people’s lives. For real.

I can’t believe this is the 5th anniversary of goop. I look back and I don’t even really know why I started it. What the f was I thinking? I just thought, hey, why not? And now, here we are. A community. A business. A team.

I love what I do. I love to cook and travel and scour the earth to bring you the best information and products I can find. I love the connection that is made when someone stops me on the street to thank me for pointing them in the direction of the best fried chicken they have ever had, or that this site somehow made a little difference in their lives. That a burgeoning business took off after we mentioned them. That someone changed the way they related to something after reading a contributor’s piece. That someone implemented a positive change in their diet. It has been hard. And fun. And very, very challenging at times. And we are just at the beginning.

So thank you for making us a part of your lives sometimes. We appreciate it and we appreciate you.

Love, gp

[From Goop]

The rest of the Goop-letter is a hodge-podge of what Goop considers her “greatest Goop hits”. Of course she includes a rather infamous (because it was so crazy) detox plan. My favorite part is where Gwyneth DEIGNS to ask her Goop-readers to do a Goop-specific survey about how they heard about Goop, what they think about Goop, etc. Many of the questions are multiple choice, but she has left room in some places to leave your own comment. Please do this. It’s not very often that Gwyneth openly solicits the opinions of her critics, trolls, and general peasantry, so please just GO HERE to fill out the survey. Tell her how much you enjoy her new $120 “Children’s Diary”.

Also – Mario Batali confirmed that Gwyneth works out two hours every single day. Who has that kind of time?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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22 Responses to “Gwyneth Paltrow deigns to solicit your thoughts on the wonder that is Goop”

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  1. atrain says:

    I am no fan of Goop, but I don’t get the constant hate-on for everything she does. Yes, she’s completely obnoxious, but she’s not trying to be an average mom that does it all. She recommends $120 children’s diaries, because in her elite world, they are completely normal, reasonable things to buy. Not every website or celebrity needs to cater to the average woman/mom.

    • Lisa says:

      I think Ag explains it beautifully below, so I’m copying and pasting here (and hoping that’s cool with Ag):

      Ag says:
      September 26, 2013 at 12:09 pm

      One of the many problems with her is that although the prices of the s*it she shills are outrageous, and reasonable to only those with crazy money to blow, Goop wants to come off like her audience IS the average woman. She doesn’t claim to target the rich, she’d have us believe that she’s selling an aspirational, but affordable, lifestyle to the masses. Which makes her full of s*it, of course. So, the hypocrisy of her mixed message is one of the things that annoys me about her.

      • RJ says:

        Also, I think with that level of wealth comes responsibility. She could be channeling her energies to make the world a better place for those less fortunate. Angelina’s kids may own $120 diaries, but you don’t see her blabbing about/marketing it all over a website. I’m not saying every celebrity has to get out there & advocate for the poor, but if you’re not, STFU about designer crap that 99% of the world’s population can’t afford. She doesn’t seem to appreciate/acknowledge how incredibly lucky she was, to be born into incredible wealth and privilege (as is everyone who in born into wealth). Good for you, but show a little humility.

      • Lisa says:

        RJ: agreed. She’s so clueless, and that’s what drives me nuts. She seems to have *zero* idea of how privileged she is.

      • Aunt Bea says:

        Such hubris. It must be quite a burden for people such as Gwynneth and Kanye to always give the ultimate authority for perfecting humanity to mere commoners.

  2. Dawn says:

    I absolutely love that eye roll pic! It’s the best and darn it she knows why she started Goop so that she can show the world how wonderful it is to be her! Isn’t Goop and Bey besties now? Gwennie is the queen of the mean girls and other then that I find her harmless and have even liked her in few of her movies. At least those are my thoughts about her. She is a born mean girl, thinks her shit doesn’t stink and is surprised to find out it does. Nothing will ever shame her or bring her down to the real world level that those of us without wealth live in. And to her credit she does have some talent when it comes to acting as well as singing. So she has that going for her.

  3. Reece says:

    That thumbnail pic never ceases to crack me up.

  4. CaribbeanLaura says:

    I wish I could work out for two hours everyday.

    I think I’ll try to start that. Maybe an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening?

    Who am i kidding.

    • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

      Maybe you’re not like me, but five minutes in–I’m praying to God for that hour to be over.

      I hate exercising–I’ll have to start doing wii Zumba. I can’t dance….so maybe that’ll help with it too.

  5. Ruyana says:

    The strange thing is that I really like her as Pepper Potts, but as Gwyneth she makes slightly ill.

  6. Organic says:

    Oh come on. Dont troll the woman. She may be irritating but surely we are better than that.

  7. Algernon says:

    Actresses who only work 3-4 months a year and have nannies, assistants and a housekeeping staff have that kind of time.

    I think most of them work out that much and just don’t admit it because it isn’t “relateable”. One thing about Goop, she doesn’t pretend to be relateable.

  8. Ag says:

    One of the many problems with her is that although the prices of the s*it she shills are outrageous, and reasonable to only those with crazy money to blow, Goop wants to come off like her audience IS the average woman. She doesn’t claim to target the rich, she’d have us believe that she’s selling an aspirational, but affordable, lifestyle to the masses. Which makes her full of s*it, of course. So, the hypocrisy of her mixed message is one of the things that annoys me about her.

    • MistyNinja says:

      I agree with you. Do you think she may just not understand that average woman does not have that kind of money. I am basically living on parental handouts until I find a new job. My sister who is well off does not understand when I say I have no money. She will say but Dad gives you money. Yeah dimwit it covers my rent. My sister is silly like Goop. And I think she cannot think outside her space bubble. Granted that bubble is expertly crafted to keep out reality.

  9. QQ says:

    Also – Mario Batali confirmed that Gwyneth works out two hours every single day. Who has that kind of time?

    Rich people with nothing to do?

    • Christin says:

      It’s one of the few things they cannot hire someone else to do for them (though they may have a trainer or paid BS’er to encourage them and tell them how fabulous and young they look).

  10. Dorothy says:

    Ignore her, total fraud. Thank God Chris got away from her for awhile, look at any pic and how happy he is compared to with her miserable!! She cares about only herself and money for herself- truly. Me, all I know/those who know her are, just boycotting her (and informing sponsors) and supporting those in need… and there are so many. And these athletes and actors etc. should ALL be doing A LOT of charity time and money! How they can live with their own greed, when kids are dying in their Mom’s arms at any given moment, as the Mom has to decide to give her child potentially deadly water or wait for their baby to thirst to death or pray for help to arrive by miracle. And GOOP does not give to charity, her husband does or she does for PR or tax break only. Some celebs do – but no where near enough of them, in time, awareness or money! Again, blow her off – she ain’t even fun to laugh at anymore…and yeah she works out and that is all she really does except harm others- family included, so odd because Chris is so charitable and she is know as a total tightwad with that and everything. So go Chris and be happy and GOOP stay miserable….(and I’m really nice but enough with her – even my sweet sweet friends want to deck her 🙂

    • frivolity says:

      Agree wholeheartedly, Dorothy.

      In a similar vein, I’d like to share the words of Canadian band Godspeed You! Black Emperor after they won the prestigious Polaris music prize recently:

      “3 quick bullet-points that almost anybody could agree on maybe=

      -holding a gala during a time of austerity and normalized decline is a weird thing to do.

      -organizing a gala just so musicians can compete against each other for a novelty-sized cheque doesn’t serve the cause of righteous music at all.

      -asking the toyota motor company to help cover the tab for that gala, during a summer where the melting northern ice caps are live-streaming on the internet, IS FUCKING INSANE, and comes across as tone-deaf to the current horrifying malaise.

      these are hard times for everybody. and musicians’ blues are pretty low on the list of things in need of urgent correction BUT AND BUT if the point of this prize and party is acknowledging music-labor performed in the name of something other than quick money, well then maybe the next celebration should happen in a cruddier hall, without the corporate banners and culture overlords. and maybe a party thusly is long overdue- it would be truly nice to enjoy that hang, somewhere sometime where the point wasn’t just lazy money patting itself on the back.

      give the money to the kids let ‘em put on their own goddamn parties, give the money to the olds and let them try to write opuses in spite of, but let the muchmusic videostars fight it out in the inconsequential middle, without gov’t. culture-money in their pockets.

      us we’re gonna use the money to try to set up a program so that prisoners in quebec have musical instruments if they need them…

      amen and amen.

      apologies for being such bores,
      we love you so much / our country is fucked,
      xoxoxox
      godspeed you! black emperor”

  11. Claudia says:

    Why is Goop covered so much? I just came here to write that I was too bored to finish reading the title of this post when I saw her name, let alone the article.

  12. Skyblue says:

    I don’t understand why people get so upset about Gwyneth’s exercising two hours a day but never stop to think about the four hours or more a day most of us spend watching television or playing on the Internet. Going cold turkey on daily celebitchy addiction would give me an extra thirty minutes a day but I wouldn’t enjoy my morning coffee quite as much.

  13. C says:

    Her face is hideous.

  14. Baskingshark says:

    “I love the connection that is made when someone stops me on the street to thank me” No you don’t, you lying bitch. If and when that happens, you scream “UNCLEAN PROLE!!!!”, then your bodyguards mace them while you run away.