Jan 30
'09
Ali Lohan adds another 10 years to her look

Ali Lohan at photoshoot in Times Square

Lindsay Lohan’s “younger” sister Ali is 15 years old. Or at least that’s what we’ve been told for the last couple years. The problem is that Ali has a certain kind of bone structure that makes her look much older than she is. And not in a sophisticated way, like Elizabeth Taylor or Brooke Shields did when they were younger. There’s something creepier about the way Ali looks old.

Somehow, photographer Jonathan Ressler decided Ali should be included in his “Extraordinary Women” exhibit. This is confusing on a number of levels. First off, Ali is very much not a woman. Secondly, she has done nothing extraordinary. And that’s not an insult – she’s 15, she hasn’t saved the world yet. I mean she’s a Lohan so I don’t expect she’ll ever do much more than spend too much time in rehab, but it’s not fair to hold Ali accountable for what she’s going to do in the future. And last… actually, just her being a Lohan is a good enough reason why she shouldn’t be included as an “extraordinary woman.”

What in the world were the prerequisites? “Must look 45. Must give vague but unavoidable impression of sadness, desperation, and whiskey. Must be able to give camera empty, vacant, chilly stare.” Obviously Dina Lohan’s prints are all over this crime. I have no idea how, but somehow Dina made a photographer go blind.

Thanks to Dlisted for the story idea.

Here’s Ali traipsing around Times Square on a freezing day yesterday. Images thanks to Splash.

Written by JayBird

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Posted in Ali Lohan, Photos


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50 Responses to “Ali Lohan adds another 10 years to her look”

  1. rules says:

    Her handlers MUST be lying about her age. What 15 year old looks like that? Besides I have been reading for years that she is 15, seriously.

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  2. Heather says:

    Wow. What an insult to extraordinary women everywhere.

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  3. Jaclyn says:

    That dress is gorgeous, it doesn’t belong on her.
    Her tan lines make it even worse.

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  4. HEB says:

    The reality show was terrible, she came off as a vapid dumbass chasing Lindsay’s shadow

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  5. mel says:

    She’ll probably end up like her sister doing rehab before she turns 25. Sad that the parents push her to grow up so quickly and not be a normal teenager.

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  6. Stella says:

    So, she didn’t get breast implants, eh? I work for a plastic surgeon and have them myself, those are most DEFINITELY implants. What kind of whack-job mother lets a 14 year old get implants??? Look at the before/after pics, they are all over the web.

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  7. geronimo says:

    It’s awful to look at a 15yr old and see nothing but the word ‘doomed’.

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  8. Sauronsarmy says:

    “Extraordinary” has really lost its meaning huh? And do we really need ANOTHER lohan to assault our eyes/ears? It took us long enough to get rid of lindsay.

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  9. california angel says:

    Yes, those are implants. Does she not realize that those things are still growing and changing? I was a C until I was 22, and then I literally woke up a size D and have been ever since. So much for childhood these days.

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  10. Baholicious says:

    Fifteen…there aren’t words. Dina Lohan should have bamboo splinters hammered underneath her fingernails.

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  11. Jen says:

    Fake boobs, fake lips, fake hair, fake eye color. The only thing real about her is her (and her mother’s) desperation.

    And that’s really, really sad.

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  12. Codzilla says:

    Jaclyn: I agree about the tan lines — they’re awful! What’s with that white line around her neck? Maybe that’s from the collar Dina uses to chain this girl to the radiator.

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  13. Mairead says:

    This is just disturbing – even though I know full well that if she were just a bog-standard 15-year-old model that none of us would pass comment or be any the wiser, but because we know her age, the way she’s being presented is creepy.

    Although that is a lovely dress and if a certain someone (who’s taken to wearing really drab clothes or a PMT white suit and earrings on the red carpet) wore it I would probably rave about it, but here, it looks kindof… sexy?

    And it’s not her bone-strcuture making her look old. It’s those stupid extensions and half-tonne of war-paint cemented onto her smut (grouchy/pouting face) that’s doing that.

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  14. xiaoecho says:

    Perhaps she’s a real life Benjamin Button and will look younger as she ages?

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  15. DLR in Canada says:

    Has she had breast implants? They look like they have that “line” all breast augmentations have no matter how good they are. I am hoping they are not implants as that would be a very bad impression on her parents, yeah? :o

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  16. Lisa says:

    i’m actually thinking that line is caused by makeup. there is too much of a distinction between the colour of her upper chest and the colour of her breasts.

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  17. Rose says:

    I just can’t be mean about here, she’s child for heaven’s sake.

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  18. anon says:

    as desperate as she is for the attention, you’d at least think she could work up a smile…

    but then, she was prolly freezing her ass off; it’s been damned cold in nyc recently.

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  19. boomchakaboom says:

    Maybe she’s seeing the ghost of Lindsay past.

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  20. xiaoecho says:

    …..more likely the ghost of Lindsay future

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  21. Nova says:

    At first I thought those looked like implants…but they really do look like she was squeezed up into that dress and then makeup was used to make them look fuller. Still…she’s 15…there should be NO makeup on the boobs, whatsoever!

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  22. pfft says:

    Her pimp/mother should be stopped. This kid has looked like a 40 year old office manager for several years and now with those implants, she looks like a bitter, divorced, 45 year old office manager who drinks alone and desperately tries to find love at Club Med.

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  23. Elle says:

    Gorgeous dress. Wrong person.
    Why are they doing a photoshoot in subzero NY?

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  24. Ash says:

    My problem is she still trying to be like her sister. It obviously isn’t working out for Lindsey. Desperate….

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  25. Orangejulius says:

    Damn! Pfft. ‘Bitter, divorced, drinks alone’. Way, way too close to the bone here! I’m cringing under my desk…

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  26. boomchakaboom says:

    @Pfft: Hey! Don’t go lumping us bitter, divorced, drinking alone mf’s in with this tragic little mess.

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  27. Shannon says:

    Truthfully, the proof is in the pudding and Sr. Lohan is not an ugly woman. Dina Lohan is well preserved … so perhaps the process starts younger than most.

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  28. Keekee says:

    She is my daughter’s age and looks about 20 years older! My gawd! “Extraordinary Woman”? More like unparented child!!

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  29. perpetua says:

    Poor dear must be freezing… Look @ all the others in the photos. The dress is “fug” however as she must have had the death grip on it along with her helpers to keep from shivering & it has left lines in the material. Hopefully no Mag is keeping these!

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  30. vdantev says:

    Lindsay has a mini-me. Is momma Lohan trying to catch lightning in a bottle twice ?

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  31. lola lola says:

    Dina Lohan isn’t a mother. She’s a lazy, cheap, brainless bimbo who has learned how to pimp her children so she can afford a lifestyle that continues to allow her to be cheap and brainless. Sad.

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  32. LC says:

    Gosh I feel dirty looking at these photos, and I’m a female!!! Ugh…

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  33. Rebecca says:

    I dunno. Sure she looks older for her age but it’s just an opinion. I think it’s kind of harsh to call her “creepy” just for looking a certain way. I might not have guessed her to be 15, but I’d have no problem believing she was if someone told me. Picking on a 15 year old girl – especially one who’s in the maniacal clutches of D. Lo – seems a little highschool.

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  34. Nicola says:

    Personally, I don’t see why people say she looks “old”. Sure, maybe a little older than 15, but it’s very harsh to say she looks 45 like some people do. Really you ought to be ashamed of yourselves, I’m sure that can’t do anything good to the poor kids self esteem.

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  35. Mairead says:

    Well, I don’t mean that she looks creepy in herself; just the way that she’s presented is designed to make a young girl look older and more suitable to much older men than most of her peers. That I find creepy, not that she looks creepy because she looks more mature than 14.

    She reminds me a bit of a model-singer type that was famous in Britain in the 80s and 90s known as Mandy Smith. She met Bill Wyman whilst partying with her mother and sisters at the age of 11. (yes eleven) and was married to Wyman when it was legal at 16. Years later she talked about how it did affect her being so precocious despite everything being technically “consensual”, she really didn’t really realise that she was just not ready for it all.

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  36. chamalla says:

    It seems like there’s a very pretty girl trapped under all the ridiculous Real Housewives of Atlantic City styling.

    I don’t imagine she can help looking that old, can you imagine what that girl has seen in her short life? I hope we see a story in a few years where she blows a gasket. “Mom, dad, Linds? You can suck it. I’m going to college in Iowa to be a computer analyst, wearing sunscreen and changing my last name to Smith.”

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  37. Bodhi says:

    I think the dress is fabulous. And that Ali should start a Lohan Protection Program & run away to Iowa like charmella said.

    I feel bad for her. I mean, she doesn’t know anything but this pimped-out life & she has a train-wreck from hell for an older sister.

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  38. xiaoecho says:

    Wow, Mandy Smith!! I’d forgotten all about her

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  39. Sue D. Nimm says:

    The horrible thing is, she could probably look very attractive if she loooked more natural.

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  40. sowa says:

    omg i look like a teenager in comparision to her and i’m 22…

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  41. Diva says:

    I can’t badmouth Ali, she’s not been given a chance to be anything but a product by her demented mother.

    I think she looks like a 15 year-old being pushed to look older. Underneath all the makeup and put-ons, she looks like any number of my sister’s friends, and she’s 16.

    The dress, in another color, would be gorgeous. Maybe not for Ali, not now, but it’s a beautiful dress. The SHOES, however… wth? Don’t go with the dress at all!

    I feel very sorry for Ali Lohan. Her childhood has been stolen from her worse than any Duggar child, in my opinion.

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  42. brista says:

    I saw this picture on the front page and I thought it was Demi Moore!

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  43. Rosebudd says:

    At 1st, I thought it was Lindsay w/ brown hair. So many funny comments above, i.e., bamboo splinter, collar chained to radiator, old office manager. Poor girl..unfortunately, Ali in some way probably thinks this is what she wants. Children of alcoholics and crazy mothers like Dina really confuse children. Look at beautiful, young & appropriately dressed Dakota Fanning. Hope Ali does go to Iowa to get college degree. It’s not just about the degree itself, but the learning and growing & transition years into adulthood yrs. w/o parents interference.

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  44. barneslr says:

    I don’t understand…where has CPS been all this time? Why hasn’t Dina Lohan been investigated and this child removed from her home? Isn’t sexualizing an underaged minor child grounds for having the child taken away and placed into a better, healthier environment?

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  45. elaterlex says:

    i’ve got a question, maybe somebody know who is a designer of this dress?

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  46. serena says:

    omfg..what’s with that look? Are those boobs fake? xDD and all of her IS FAKE. and she likes to look old..well for her x°D I do not understand that. And dina is makin’ such a fuss over it..she wants her daughters to be famous, how and why is another matter. The worst mom ever. And here we are willin’ why lindsday ends up like this …

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  47. Woah amazing. I really adore studying these posts

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