Justin Theroux on his wedding plans: ‘You guys are in more of a rush than we are’

wenn21485686

Am I the only obsessed with figuring out if Justin Theroux wore mascara on the red carpet for The Leftovers a few nights ago? I keep looking through the close-ups and… I really think he was wearing eye makeup. Not only that, I’m pretty sure he curled his eyelashes too. Amazing! I actually like some guyliner on a man – Ewan McGregor is always extra-attractive to me when he rocks from guyliner. But I do think Justin looked hyper-groomed at the premiere and it was strangely unsexy. Like, he looks better in his hipster gear.

Anyway, there weren’t that many quotes that came out of the red carpet. I can’t even find ONE real interview that Justin has done in support of his HBO series. Is that weird? Like, the only promotion he’s done is just walking the red carpet with Jennifer and mentioning to one outlet that Jennifer is sort of who he would maybe want to be Rapture’d with? But now there’s one more little quote, and of course it’s about the long-awaited wedding:

The night began when the pair arrived to the red carpet hand in hand. They were all over each other as photographers snapped away, Jen showing off her 8-carat, half-million-dollar engagement ring.

Justin told “Extra” the two are still “happily engaged,” adding that when it comes to wedding plans, “You guys are in more of a rush than we are. We have hot feet, but we’re not going to let you guys know.”

[From Extra]

Maybe this is why Justin hasn’t done any major press. He doesn’t want to be asked tons of questions about Jennifer, the engagement, the wedding plans and all of that. Sure. I can understand that. But it’s still kind of weird because Jennifer and her publicist have been updating People Mag about every single little movement for literally years. Remember the People cover last year, where People’s “sources” (Huvane) confirmed that Justin and Jennifer were putting their wedding on hold indefinitely while they worked out their sh-t? Yeah. Don’t try to play it like “we have hot feet” and “You guys are in more of a rush than we are.” But I guess whatever it takes to promote the show?

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Photos courtesy of WENN.

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80 Responses to “Justin Theroux on his wedding plans: ‘You guys are in more of a rush than we are’”

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  1. Jac says:

    I find them both dull as f—.

    • Kaylar says:

      +1000. ..dull as shite too…but they desperately don’t want to be. Lol.

      Also, if it’s true what he says that: ‘You guys are in more of a rush (wedding) than we are,’ then why did your girlfriend’s power PR flack hijack People Mag’s Oscar cover 2 years ago with a cover story on your “imminent wedding plans,” and deets on “the dress?” I don’t recall you coming out then and saying it was all b.s. Mr. Baldy McHipster.

      Personally, I think they were intending to beat you know who to the altar, try to steal some thunder, and got some bad information about their wedding plans, lol…so they were thrown for a loop and cancelled the whole deal. I think it’s not going to happen for them..it seems so quid pro quo arranged…they get together..and he ia suddenly signed with her agency CAA (in his 40s!) he gets People Mag sexiest man alive rankings, GQ (Huvane bros.) features, and roles in HBO series. Come on.

      He seems contractually obligated if you ask me.

      Remember when she was dating John Mayer and he was supposedly getting his own variety show out of it..he dumped her, and the plans for the show (probably Huvane generated) went up in smoke too. Guess Mayer thought it wasn’t worth it. Lol

      • Jem says:

        agree with everything you said; all of this is strategy, little if any is organic and genuine

        And I think they are DEF waiting until you-know-who and whats-her-name get married, then hitch themsleves onto that publicity juggernaut by doing the same in short order… The longer they drag this out, the more obvious it is

      • Lee says:

        Justin was in a HBO series loooong before he met Jen – 6 Feet Under.

      • Kaylar says:

        Lee, do you know how many two bit, struggling heretofore unknown actors have had guest parts and recurring roles on HBO series over the last 25 years? Answer: shittons.

    • darkdove says:

      I dont get get GQ magazine why are they so much in to Jennifer does Huvane own it.

      • Kaylar says:

        Sort of. Chris Huvane was the sr. West Coast editor of GQ. His bro Stephen is Aniston’s publicist, while Kevin Huvane may be her agent at CAA. They all work in tandem to help each others bank accounts where clients are concerned and probably get in total, about 25-30 percent of Aniston’s gross.

      • darkdove says:

        yeah gross i didnt get the facination that particular magzaine had with her while other magazines were neutral.

      • Ag says:

        @kaylar – that is SO interesting. incredible how “incestuous” it all is.

    • Happyhat says:

      +1000 on the zzzzzzzzzzzzz of these people. They’re a slightly higher-rent Eddie and Rimes (can’t be bothered to check if their dullard names are spelt correctly)

      • Lee says:

        I used to like Justin before the Jen thing. He was great at playing asshole douche’s (like in American Psycho and Broken English). Now he’s as yawnworthy as his lurve. Jen would already be long forgotten without the Brangelina triangle – she’s basically gotten an A-list career out of it.

    • aemish says:

      Co-sign

    • gennie says:

      Seriously, I was getting surgery and the anesthesia Dr. sees me reading a magazine with Jen A on it said “She is a boring person…same vacation place and never changes her style”. Wow, everyone is a critic. Bye Jen.

  2. Kaye says:

    Much as I’d like to rag on this hyper-groomed hipster for wearing mascara, I have to admit noticing his long and curly eyelashes in many pictures before this, so maybe they’re natural. The man does have pretty eyes.

    • Kaylar says:

      Hmm. If you like that Ted Bundy kind of manic stare.

      I don’t think it’s mascara so much as he’s probably had his lashes dyed. We all know he goes through boxes of Clairol blue black hair dye like popcorn, but if you notice on this red carpet he’s brought it up to brownish black. I think while he was in the chair they did his brows and lashes.

    • Eleonor says:

      I have a thing for men with pretty eyes: one of my exboyfriend has eyelashes to die for. Seriously, so long and perfectly curved that seem fake.
      I was so jelous!

  3. Allie says:

    Who is “you guys”? I hope he doesn’t mean the public, because nobody gives a crap. Yes, I know I clicked on this link-just an excuse to write this comment because as I’m stuck at a job I hate, struggling with paying the bills, the worst part of his millionaire job is answering questions about his upcoming wedding. Justin, you are one brave man.

    • Esti says:

      Uh, he didn’t actually complain about being asked questions. And I think “you guys” referred to the press, because they do ask about the wedding a lot.

      • Kaylar says:

        Maybe the press asks a lot because without his newfound fame as savior to ‘Ms Woman Scorned 2005’ no one would know or care about him or his tv show. They also announced their engagement to ‘the press’ and had people rag do a breathless cover story on their imminent wedding. So him playing coy now and wondering why the press is so interested is disingenuous as f. It’s like aniston sobbing about Pitt to vanity Fair and crying in oprah’s bazooms and vowing to be married with kids and having her PR bestie attack Pitt and his family….then wondering why the press is interested in her moving on and her ‘love life.’ She handed that shite to them on a silver platter that’s why.

      • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

        I think this is the first time he’s been asked about the wedding (which would make sense, because this is his first job since Rock of Ages i.e. he wouldn’t really give interviews), and Jennifer has been asked 2-3 times…in Marie Claire (that interview that came out like a day after the second PEOPLE cover that she said was putting the wedding off–she talked about her wedding hair), in an rc interview for that lifetime movie short she did (where she was asked about her wedding dress), and I think one other time that I vaguely remember–I think maybe in GMA.

        So I’m wondering if she’s put a kibosh on wedding questions–because I’m surprised they haven’t asked her about it during her Living Proof interviews, for instance.

    • kri says:

      God, he is wearing alot of akeup. And it’s hilarious that he is showing is priorities-first thing he’d want to take with him are his keys, cell and oh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Jen,yes, Jen-of course! And now he says “You guys are in more of a rush than we are”.LOL! He seems the opposite of eager to be with her. He’s boring and she’s boring-er.

  4. Rhiley says:

    Yesterday it came to me who Justin reminds me of, Lord Farquaad. He just needs a Prince Valiant haircut.

  5. lisa2 says:

    It was very interesting for me to learn that some of her fans are now ANTI People magazine. That they accuse People of shading Jennifer and Justin because they have a “undercover” deal with another couple. I don’t get that. But People has always..ALWAYS been very supportive of Jennfer Aniston. We have seen the cover and the stories. Covers that came out when she had nothing to promote. Covers that have celebrate every mundane thing.. As noted those covers about the wedding. Those came from somewhere. I mean to put her on the cover and sidebar the Oscars.. And I stopped my subscription to People when they had her or someone on the cover when the Haiti disaster happened, Not because she or whoever was there; but they didn’t focus on Haiti. It made me sick.

    So I don’t get some of her fans hating on People mag now and being so angry and coming up with some conspiracy that the mag has turned on her.. maybe they are a bit pissed they got some exclusive and nothing happened.

    I’m long winded.. sorry.
    there are thing she gets shit for that I won’t rag on her about. 1. having kids.. I’m single; nearing her age. I don’t want kids. Nothing wrong with that and every woman is not meant to be a mommy. Some women I know should have said not to being a mommy.

    2. not married yet. There are many couples engaged and not married yet. It is about the commitment you make to someone; not the ring. DIVORCE happens too often. So there.

    But there are other things I will call her out on so…

    • Kaylar says:

      Don’t know why her stans are upset. Her camp absolutely has a deal with People Mag. I recall being in Walgreens a while back and at one point noticed she was on all three of their ‘special’ editions (style issue, decades issue, etc.) Again, a Huvane quid pro quo deal probably: i.e., feature Aniston on 25% of your rags this year and make my other client goopyth most beautiful, and you’ll get exclusive rights to any Aniston wedding deets and photos.

      • lisa2 says:

        I have seen comments of theirs saying that she doesn’t have a “deal” with People and how proud they are that this is the case. I wonder why they never had a problem until people started questing those last People covers. Outside of those People has pretty much been Pro Aniston on every occasion.

      • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

        @lisa2
        I don’t get that. PEOPLE hasn’t printed anything negative–they gave her the covers, and didn’t cast any allusions as to *why* the wedding was being delayed–at least not any allusions that were not Aniston-approved. So why would anyone be mad?

  6. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    This will sound judgey, and I don’t mean it to, but I don’t get being engaged for years and years. To me, you decide to get married, you set a date, and during the period in between, you’re engaged. It sort of loses it’s meaning if it just lingers on in limbo for years. I understand sometimes you’re waiting for someone to graduate or whatever, but if they are really engaged, why don’t they get married? Already.

    • Jayna says:

      I have said the same thing. I said it on Angelina’s thread once. Why get engaged at a certain age and years drag on and on. It’s silly. Don’t even bother getting engaged.

      • Kaylar says:

        I really don’t think you can compare a new bicoastal couple’s several year engagement with a couple that has been partnered for a decade who have a stated commitment to grow old together and raise children, sans the paper.

        Brad and Angie’s life doesn’t change one iota if they’re married or not. They said they would do it if the kids wanted it and when everyone was able to, but it has little to do with whether or not they’re a committed couple and family.

        Try again.

      • Chinoiserie says:

        I wish Jayna had not mentioned Angelina and Brad but I disagree with you Kaylar. I think it is more important to be married if you do have children. Marriage offers more protection for children and both spouses in terms who will get the custody if there is a break up. Children are bigger commitment than marriage. If you are already engaged there is not need to delay marriage for years.

      • Kaylar says:

        I disagree Chinoiserie. One, if you’re concerned about and talking custody issues and trust issues with a partner before a lifelong commitment – how will a piece of paper ‘protect your children?’ That makes no sense. If your eye is on that self defeatist ball already, maybe you shouldn’t be together in the first place.
        .
        The only other issues are legal and having to do with estate planning should something happen to one of the two parties, and that (with trusts and living wills) and other legal paperwork, can easily be taken care of sans a piece of marriage paper.

        I have no doubt Brad and Angelina have every ‘protection,’ in place when it comes to their children.

      • Jojoann says:

        I think the Branjelinas kids also sense that marriage provides a firmer foundation or they wouldnt have insisted that their folks to marry. I am no traditionalist but it says alot when kids that young and who are exposed to all kinds of families, still feel that marriage will add something to their family.

        I dont think it matters too much whether JenJustin marry anyway. They dont seem to have too much at stake, they have no kids together and both are financially secure. They dont even seem long term to me.

      • Kaylar says:

        Jojoann, I don’t think so. Angelina already said the kids just want a big party and cake. So there goes your theory and your shade thrown at the brange family. They all seem secure and happy. Sorry to disappoint. I agree about aniston and this dude though – seems like a fake PR relationship not destined to go the distance. They have zero chemistry.

    • Ag says:

      i agree. since it’s the traditional “means to an end,” the end (the marriage) needs to be in sight. if someone is planning a huge wedding or something, yeah, they might need some time. but years? esp with huge financial resources? i don’t get it. it appears very iffy and indecisive, like maybe the couple isn’t sure about wanting to get married. which is fine – but why get engaged then?

    • LadyMacbeth ex Hiddles F. says:

      Same for me… I was engaged for years and then the relationship fell apart. I didn’t think that to get engaged meant also something different at that time… Meaning there was no interest on both parts to get married soon. It seemed silly….
      With my husband, I got engaged two months before the wedding lol

    • mimif says:

      I’ve been engaged for…3 years now. Wedding dates have been set and changed, circumstances arose (and keep arising) that made it impossible for us to wed as we imagined. The wedding is still on the back burner for another 6 months (maybe more), until things smooth out. We could always go do a quickie wedding, but that doesn’t really interest either one of us, so we are choosing to wait until the time is right. In the meantime, we are still very much engaged (and very much in love).
      Just wanted to offer another perspective. 🙂

      • Ag says:

        @mimif – oh, no, i totally get it, things happen and stuff gets postponed. i was totally generalizing and talking about couples who are just sort of in limbo for years, with apparently no “reason” behind it. also, with people with large resources, it’s easier to work around “stuff that happens.”

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        I think it’s cute when you do it. 🙂
        No, I get that things can happen or you need to wait for something to be over or save the money or somebody gets sick or their job has a short term busy spell or somebody’s parent dies, or a million other things. I just don’t get the engagement, then nothing in the works for years for no apparent reason. Good luck with your plans, and congratulations and best wishes.

    • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

      I don’t really have shade toward anyone who has a long engagement. Like, I do think that if you are engaged, then that means that you should be okay with being married to that person in a month (or whatever time period). I think different circumstances arise, that might make you put off the wedding–but I also feel like an engagement is sort of seem as legitimizing the relationship. Something that the world can see. He’s not JUST your boyfriend, he’s your fiance, someone you’re going to (presumably) spend the rest of your life with. Everyone is different–I think that if I got engaged, then I’d want to do it within a few months. I’m not someone who would want a big wedding, and Lord knows I wouldn’t want to plan it.

      I only shade Jennifer and Justin because of that PEOPLE tomfoolery last year, when she hijacked the 2013 Oscar cover with her wedding plans (and didn’t even really give a scoop that would warrant a cover, such as who is designing her wedding rings or something), then had another cover in the summer about how they were too busy to get married (and Dailymail said that there was supposed to be a third cover about the wedding that PEOPLE scrapped), and then in an interview Jennifer got a little snippy (at least how I took it), when asked about her wedding & why it hasn’t happened yet–saying nothing had been planned, so there was nothing to put off (which probably pissed off PEOPLE). And then she and Justin started this weird thing that they’re doing now…..

      But if none of the above had happened, then I’d be curious about WHEN they’re getting married, but I wouldn’t be saying on here that I think there’s something fishy going on with their relationship, simply because they’ve been engaged for a little under two years.

      • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

        Yeah, I didn’t mean it to sound all shady. I just personally don’t get it, but they probably don’t care if I get it or not. Also, has it really been under two years? It seems like eternity. Lol

      • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

        @GoodNames
        NO–I didn’t mean that YOU were casting shade on ANYONE….I just meant that I cast shade on Jennifer and Justin’s engagement because of the PEOPLE crap, and then pretending afterwards like they don’t know the *cause* of all the speculation. If they hadn’t given those covers, did those interviews afterwards (Jennifer more than Justin), then I wouldn’t be casting shade on anyone.

        I kinda don’t get it either–but that’s just me. But I get that some people don’t take the actual marriage part as seriously, and that’s okay.

        And it has seemed like an eternity—probably because they keep talking about it. I mean, I’ve hardly heard/read any rumors/tabloid rumors about Brad and Angelina’s engagement/wedding plans. The tabloids seem to really be going after Jennifer and Justin. Which is a step up from the constant baby rumors–well, if they break up, there’ll probably be another round of that.

  7. mia girl says:

    Odd man out here – I like Theroux as an actor. I liked him in Mulholland Drive and thought he was great in Six Feet Under.

    I do recall he has some nice eyelashes so not sure how enhanced they are on this red carpet. For me I think the red carpet smile is what he can’t seem to get right.

  8. jj says:

    In the bottom pic, they both look quite attractive, which surprised me as I think she is pretty average looking.

  9. Ag says:

    he is looking fierce in that header pic. lol

  10. june says:

    Does Justin realize no one would care about him if he was not “engaged” to the forever scorned Aniston? He would not even be doing interviews that end up on People mag.

    No one is in a rush to see them get married, most people have no clue who he is.
    Remember this People cover in 2013…she had the Dress, the DATE, and the rings…..then nothing happened
    http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20677544,00.html
    From Huvane (over a year ago!!!):
    ” Just don’t expect the wedding, which is likely to take place soon after Aniston wraps her current film in Connecticut on March 8, to be a lavish production”

  11. Mel M says:

    I posted in the first post about this premiere about the mascara. I totally noticed his lashes and never have before.

  12. megsie says:

    Sweet lord, these two are tiresome

  13. GIRLFACE says:

    “Happily engaged” sounds like Justin’s done, lol. Why become happily married when you’re happily engaged? It seems like he’s trying to make it abundantly clear that Jennifer is dragging him to the altar. I think she probably has some issues, and I suspect drama shall ensue.

    • Jayna says:

      I doubt she is. She is beyond wealthy and marriage still means sharing that if divorced from a pre-nup that would still give him millions. They aren’t having kids. He’s the one that would benefit from marriage to her.

      • GIRLFACE says:

        I accept this as a possibility. But I mean, could he be anymore passively dismissive when it comes to the wedding shenanigans? He basically said “Yeeeeeauhhhh… wedding… uhh “

    • Chris says:

      When I hear the word “engaged”, I think “intending to marry within the next two years”. How long have these two been engaged? It seems like forever. So very tired of this narrative. Get married or just date. I guess ENGAGEMENT brings magazine covers, so they say they are engaged. I think these two are fine without marriage and kids, but just play the game for the People Magazine readers of the world. I really wish it would stop.

  14. Paige says:

    Justin and Jennifer can get married when they decide to but I don’t really think he’s in a rush. He was with his ex for fourteen years. He doesn’t seem like a man that wants to tie the knot. I really hope it because they both want to wait and not because he has issues with commitment. He says people are rushing them, well maybe it’s the unnecessary magazine covers talking about the wedding, which is fine when you’re promoting something but what were they promoting?

  15. Tippy says:

    Justin’s eyelashes are all clumped together.

    Jenn looks terrific.

    A wedding seems as though it would be anti-climactic. More drama and intrigue is what is needed between these two.

  16. Altariel says:

    I get zero good vibes from this guy.

  17. Diana says:

    I would wear the f* out of that dress (to work). Im

  18. joan says:

    I don’t take them seriously — but at least they’re kind of movie stars.

    The one I don’t get is Leann Rimes. Whoooo cares?

    Why does Rimes get so much attention?

  19. Liberty says:

    JT: You guys! you guys need to understand the silky ligaments of our relationship art, and comprehend them as like, twisty golden bridges lumbering into the super-mysterious future mists that are like bigger than the unproven Druid cattle ceremony that is “marriage” okay? You guys need to understand we have like, hot burning feet, feet that are aflame with the desire to run, to run far, feet with a burning rush to run like the wind, shooting raw heat like the intense burn-off of jet fuel , to go where no one can follow me, ever —

    JA: — but like “we’re getting married on his birthday” for sure this time. August! In Cabo or if not Cabo a beach place like Hawaii or like maybe my house and definitely with salads and sun and a tequila fountain like it said in the email that may have gotten out. Right, my still-shifting pile of sculptured abdominal sand?

    JT: But, my babe, as I explained to you when we skyped last month, the influence that propelled you and me to add to the earth’s meta-cultural being via our beauty and rom-coms is like a spiky bold-nippled village mistress that takes more pleasure in the slow spanking and dancing of our exultant freedom and personal style and press play than in the potentially co*k-blocking peasant rush for a kitchen renovation and another closet rehab —

    JA: Ha ha! Well, yes, my babe, but haha I think all this Luftwaft excitement has you confused! be clear, we’re “getting married” before I have my ring replated. And I think you want to remember our recent wonderful shoot for my Move Over Monaco, Here Comes America’s Royal Twins cover! Because, like, babies, marriage, stuff, reasons, right, my babe?

    JT: But, my babe, I feel that we both savvy hard that it is an intense-friendship ring as symbolized by the raw quartz lump, and our projects take precedence to bowing to formulaic Western social order or maleficent actions elsewhere! I am like, mega-aware, of how our lives were elevated by destiny’s street bikes which let us experience all there is and more, like kittens drunk on cream, my luscious spa-breathed babe of birch twig thunder, at any time, without the heavy hubcabs of Life’s Pontiac to weigh me down and strip my glowing shoreline before I score a role in Star Wars as like, the uber-hot starship pilot Francois Louis Solo —

    JA: Ha ha, yes, my exfoliated toast-point of two-wheeling traction-seeking treasure, but aw, you’re looking a little pale, you need a dry brushing and a tan then we’ll try this again, okay guys because we know you need to know more!

    • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

      *slow claps*
      OMG, Liberty. I feel like you get better and better….you should start a website (or something) and write these down. Or a book–I’d buy it.

    • videli says:

      I just came back from swimming, so my heart rate is up, and laughing at this helps bringing it down, though I laugh too hard to breath well.
      Also, since i come from the beach, ‘abdominal sand’ meshes into a different image for me right now.

    • Liberty says:

      hahaha 🙂

    • Shaye Kay says:

      @Jayna
      I agree with you on both couples! Engagement to me means marriage in 1 year or 2 max. Except for really extenuating circumstances (illness, death in family,etc.) but the 2 couples have had plenty of time in the course of 2 and 9 year relationships to get married if they really wanted to do so.
      In the words of Inigo Montoya “I do not think this means what you think this means.”
      Maybe engagements now mean ” I am seriously thinking that I might want to marry you at some point in the distant future.”
      I do think kids are a more serious commitment… But that it to the kids not the other parent. I also think 3 out of the 4 of these people are probably once bitten twice shy.
      What we need here is to clear up this ” failure to communicate” by having:
      Dating
      Engagement ring
      Imminent wedding ring
      Wedding band
      Easy peasy!

      • Janet says:

        “Engagement to me means marriage in 1 year or 2 max.”

        Not any more.

        I know couples who have been engaged for years with no wedding date in sight. One of them has been together for over 15 years and engaged for the last seven. I asked the woman if they ever plan to get married and she said “Hell no. Why mess up a good thing?”

  20. anom says:

    wth? she looks like a dude wearing a wig with makeup.

  21. BunnyBabe says:

    They gross me out – so desperate. I’ve never thought of her as pretty. And I’ve never watched Friends. I’m not a 90’s anything fan tho. Brad, good call on the upgrade.

    Can you believe I had the BALLS to say that JA fans?!

    😉

    • RobN says:

      Yes, an anonymous quote on the internet is very brave.

      • BunnyBabe says:

        Robn, there was this kind of joke of saying BALLS themed statements on Jolie/Aniston pages. I was referencing that. So thanks anyways but have a seat.

  22. Shaye Kay says:

    Late night in France and the phone rings:

    Brad: “hello”
    Justin”jens’s on an alcohol run so I only got a minute… What the hell do I do to keep from marrying her?”
    Brad sighs ” dude I’ m tring to enjoy some weed before the ball and chain gets back from… Whatever the hell country’s she’s in. (Big drag). Tell everybody it’s a promise for the future.”
    Justin” ok man, thanks for the advice.”

    Late at night in LA and the phone rings:
    Jen ‘hello”
    Angie”hey brad’s smoking some major shit in the wine cellar…. Do you think it will help him forget that whole let’s get married thing?”
    Jen laughs ” you keep forgetting what I said as long as you keep bringing it up brad will keep resisting the idea. Go put on a veil and scare the hell out of him! Look Ang that reminds me I gotta hop over to the drugstore and grab some ‘Modern Brides” mags! Justin will turn white … well really pale orange, almost apricot”
    Angie ” see you on the flip side b@tch”
    Jen”sure thing ho”

    • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

      *snickers*

    • Kaylar says:

      Oh girl. You need to attend the Liberty school of parody. There’s always more than a bit of truth in it – in fact you take your known quantities, and start from there. See men fly from Aniston like bats outta hades (Liberty). Where you go wrong? Inferring Brad has cold feet. Again we’re talking Angelina here, not the tv shittcom hack who is the equivalent of human melatonin. Have a seat. ; )

      • Shaye Kay says:

        Just skip my posts if it makes you feel better.
        I didn’t go wrong to imply that Brad has cold feet. You lost your sense of humor when I implied he might not want to marry Jolie.
        You might have noticed that I was implying that none of them truly wanted to be married….if the idea that Brad could possibly not want Jolie hadn’t left you with a humor deficit you might have realized that.
        The grain of truth is the ring he gave Jolie was described by his people as a”promise for the future” If that’s a grain of truth you don’t let like than that’s your problem not my failure.
        It’s ok though girlfriend what I wrote was for adults who can laugh at their celeb crushes.

      • Virgilia Coriolanus says:

        I thought it was very funny–it’s a parody of their actual relationships (not sure if I’m using the right word, but can’t think of anything else)….Jennifer and Angelina obviously do not talk; I think that Brad wanted to get married a whole lot more than Angelina, etc. But it was still funny. She writes a whole LOT BETTER than the freaking tabloids. They should hire her to write their stories–make it the gossip ‘funnies’….

      • Josephina says:

        @ Kaylar –

        Liberty has a GIFT. Her writing style makes us thirsty for more.

        I see your point. Justin and Brad sharing a conversation about Jennifer? Not likely.

        Angelina taking advice from Aniston…on ANYTHING? Please put down the pipe and slowly step away.

      • shaye kay says:

        God God! Of course none of the four of them talk! Thus the humor of imagining any of the four calling each other up in the middle of the night! Of course, we all know Jen belongs in AA, Brad loves weed, Angie doesn’t want to marry Brad, and Justin is orange-y colored. All ot these thinks are meant as an OTT parody of the way these people are portrayed on this site!
        I can’t help but notice that the only people who have a problem with the humor are acting as though Saint Jolie’s reputation has somehow been besmirched. No one is defending Brad, Jen, or Justin.
        Put your big girl panties on for the love of God! Some of us like to have fun and laugh!

  23. Jenny12 says:

    If you want to be married, great- if you don’t, no problem either- but what is the point of being endlessly engaged?

  24. Shaye Kay says:

    Night guys! Sorry for the quadruple post but my ipad evidentally is having a personality problem tonight!