Demi Lovato on Wilmer Valderrama: ‘I wouldn’t be alive without him today’

Demi Lovato

Demi Lovato and Wilmer Valderrama have been dating for about five years. That seems like forever for a guy who’s known for messing with fragile lady minds and zeroing in on vulnerable women. Given Demi’s history with self harm and an eating disorder, Wilmer could have been a very bad boyfriend choice. They did break up a few times but appeared surprisingly solid for the past few years. He gave her a Tiffany ring in 2013. All along, they’ve stayed very private as a couple.

Things have changed very fast. Demi and Wilmer are making public, smooshy love declarations on Twitter. I expect an engagement announcement soon.

Get a room, right? Demi also raved to HuffPo about Wilmer when she was supposedly discussing her new record label, Safehouse Records ( which she launched with Nick Jonas). You can see Demi’s interview clip here. Some excerpts:

Why she and Wilmer are so lovey now: “For us, we wanted to keep our private lives private, and we still do. But as we’ve been in a relationship on and off, gosh, almost 5 years now … people are seeing us more together. We thought you know what, if paparazzi gets us, whatever. But, we’re in control of what we’re able to post online, so we’re very open about our relationship.”

Wilmer helped her recovery: “I also wanted to give him a lot of credit that he never takes … He’ll never take credit for a lot of my sobriety and my recovery but I guarantee it, I wouldn’t be alive without him today.”

[From HuffPo Live]

Wilmer and Demi’s public declarations are cute but unexpected since they were private for so long. People can change, although I still wonder if a womanizing dude can ever truly reform. Wilmer’s shady reputation isn’t aided by his long stint as Fez on That ’70s Show. Perhaps doing voicework for Handy Manny rubbed off on him for the better.

Wilmer Valderrama

Demi Lovato

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News & WENN

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

37 Responses to “Demi Lovato on Wilmer Valderrama: ‘I wouldn’t be alive without him today’”

Comments are Closed

We close comments on older posts to fight comment spam.

  1. Ana says:

    I agree with some of the old commenters who thought her relying so much on Wilmer was worrying. I hope he truly helped her but that strength would be able to continue without him, because if not they day he leaves she will completely break down and it will be absolutely scary.

    I am afraid if these two get married, it will be Britney circa 2007 all over again.

    • Wonderbunny says:

      I agree with your assessment. There’s a lot of overlapping between addictions and relationship entanglements. I wish she’d find her own power within and not have to rely on someone else to keep her alive.

    • Bonehead says:

      I have a really hard time believing she suffered from anything as severely as she makes it seem. Those who dabbled in drugs and want attention will exaggerate stories to the point where it sounds identical to what Demi keeps going on about, and those who have actually struggled with these things are definitely more reserved about it.

      • Ana says:

        I thought it was proved she used to self-harm? If she is bipolar then a bad low mixed with drugs could be quite dangerous.
        I am reserved with my own issues, but if I had her outlet and fame I certainly would be outspoken about them like she has been, of course if I were in a place where I could be inspiring to others with similar problems.

      • Naddie says:

        This. It pains me do admit, but I never buy anything she says or sings. I’m not saying this to acuse, I know what is like to struggle with issues, but she always sounds painfully histrionic and fake.

      • Bridget says:

        “Those who actually struggled with those things are actually reserved about it”

        What on earth are you talking about? Are you trying to imply that ‘real’ addicts don’t talk about their recovery and aren’t passionate about it? Because that’s not even close to true.

        Demi’s bulimia, cutting, alcohol amd drug abuse are pretty well known.

      • Alex says:

        Eh I don’t know. I work with current and former drug abusers in research and each one of them talks about their experience differently. I’ve had a guy laugh while recounting times where he almost died from an overdose. One girl who was clearly feeling guilty about her years of addiction and several who actually talk to schools about addiction. It’s different for every person.

        And considering how out of control she was before forced into rehab (visible cutting marks, punching her backup singer, seeming under the influence in public) I believe she really was that bad.

      • Shambles says:

        I see where you’re coming from, Bonehead, but I’m not quite sure that’s fair. Everyone deals with hardship in a different way, and maybe Demi’s path to healing includes talking about her struggle. I think she has every right to do that without being greeted with the suspicion that she’s “only doing it for attention.” That line of thinking is slightly dangerous. If every survivor, whether it be a survivor of addiction, disease, or God forbid, rape, were greeted with a side-eye and a “you’re just talking about it for attention” (which rape victims usually are anyway), no one would want to share their stories for their own recovery and to help others who may be struggling. That’s not the kind of world I want to live in, personally.

  2. Megan says:

    He’s gotten better looking… He looks less sleazy than he used to

    • GingerCrunch says:

      Right? The pic of him in that suit is fantastic! He’s not too pretty. Could be a case of the clothes making the man, tho!

  3. minx says:

    Anything is possible, I guess, but he seems so sleazy and not trustworthy.
    I really wish the best for her. My daughter and I used to watch her and Selena Gomez on Disney and Demi had the far better voice. She was also endearing.

  4. Bluebell says:

    I really hate hearing that people only made it through rough patches because of some other person. As someone who’s been down and suffered severe depression in the past, but who is also on my own, it makes me feel that next time when I’m in that situation that I might as well give up now because without that someone to pull me through I’d be dead. And I haven’t got that person to keep me going, you know what I mean?

    Anyway I’m talking in general terms and not about Demi. I’m annoyed at her right now anyway because she was papped wearing an outfit I wanted for a while (not any of the ones pictured here, but another one) and I was gonna buy it next payday and now she’s been seen in it I’m sure it will sell out before I can buy it. Ho hum.

    • Wonderbunny says:

      I don’t think you’d want to live in a way that would require another person to keep you going. It sounds horrible.

      Sometimes I think of depression as slowly drowning. Other people might come and try to pull you out, but if you do nothing yourself, they can’t save you. Ultimately we all have to do the work ourselves, and whilst we can get a bit of help from others, it’s down to us to leverage that help to our advantage. And if there is nobody near to help, you have to go out of your way to ask for help.

    • CMC says:

      Bluebell, I totally agree you. You cannot ascribe responsibility for your existence and well-being to another person. While a boyfriend or a spouse can be a positive and uplifting influence. You can only rescue yourself.

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      I agree with you. My husband helped me in many ways when I was severely depressed, and he has endured a lot. But it’s ultimately up to me to recognize the signs of a downward spiral and take steps to stop it, and it’s up to me to stay heathy in every way I can. There’s another famous person, I can’t remember who, and she always says her spouse “takes care of me” and recognizes the signs for her. That’s not fair to him, in my opinion. I don’t want my husband to feel responsible for my mental health, because that puts him in such a terrible position. Very selfish of the depressed person, I think.

  5. Babalon says:

    His abuse of her is a staple of blind items, though…

  6. marie says:

    Sometimes it takes the right person to make a man WANT to nit really change, but just be better. I’m going to give the benifit of the doubt. She seems to have a strong identity outside of him, so I’m just happy she’s not a strung out mess. Good for them.

    • Tifygodess says:

      The problem with that way of thinking though “takes the right person (woman) to make a man change for the better- or be better” is that many women believe they will be that person and then stay in a horrible relationship especially an abusive one. “Oh he only needs me to love him more…maybe if I didn’t make him mad…..he will change because I’m different….” When I’m reality The only person that can make someone change is themselves – No one else.

  7. Jess says:

    That’s wonderful how he helped her but I hope she realizes she has that strength on her own as well, he’s a creep who in my opinion preys on young starlets, so I hope her sobriety isn’t completely wrapped up in him.

  8. MrsBPitt says:

    Can people change and grow….I hope so! Are we the same person, we were at age 18, when we turn 30? or 40? Of course, the shining example of change for the better is Angelina Jolie….wild child to activist, married, with six kids. But. then you have the other side of the spectrum…Charlie Sheen…wild child to wilder, crazier, middle aged man….I don’t know much about Wilmer Valderrama, but I hope for Demi’s sake, that he has changed for the better! Didn’t he used to date Lindsey Lohan? What’s the age differenct between Wilmer and Demi? He looks a lot older than her! (too lazy to google).

    • MrsBPitt says:

      Just googled (had some coffee) He is 35 and she is 22! So he was 30 and she was 17 when they got together….not cool, dude!

      • JenniferJustice says:

        Yeah. I have big issues with age gaps when one is still a teen. Gross!

      • Bridget says:

        He dated and lived with Lohan when she was 17 as well. He keeps getting older, but his girlfriends stay the same age

    • Chris says:

      Exactly! People make a big deal out of Kylie Jenner and Tyga (as they should) but don’t have an issue with this? Plus dating underage girls is his pattern. He grosses me out.

      * sorry this was meant to go below Allie’s comment about the age difference!

  9. Allie says:

    So they’ve been dating on and off for five years. She’s 22? Glad that he was in his late 20’s or early 30’s when they first got together and she was only 17. Vom.

    • Jenjennyjenjenjenn says:

      Which is why I think they are just NOW being more public because maybe they think that once she hit 22 the age difference won’t seem as creepy.

  10. Moxie Remon says:

    She tires my beauty. Don’t like her, but hey, if he’s the one who floats her boat, then okay.

  11. Norman Bates' Mother says:

    Couples who behave like this on social media or worse – while sitting next to a bunch of people during a party or other kind of meet-up annoy me so, so much. I was never good with expressing feelings and seeing this lovey dovey stuff makes me physically uncomfortable. Get a room, narcissists! Rant over.

  12. Prim says:

    Sounds like she needs to add a few CODA and/or SLAA meetings into her Recovery schedule. If you think your sobriety is down to someone else’s “help”, it’s easy to lose that sobriety. I’ve seen plenty addicts relapse over untreated Love Addiction.

  13. L says:

    She needs help with her grammar.

  14. NerdMomma says:

    This relationship has always seemed abusive to me. It appears that he has an unhealthy amount of control over her and how she feels. Also, her comments on Twitter are lovey and gushy, but if you think about it, his comment is not. I know his kind. I was on and off with a guy just like him for five years. It sucks the life out of you.

    • RobN says:

      This is where the age difference comes in. Gushy from a 35 year old man is a lot to ask. Just throwing in Aladdin may lose him his man card. She’s 22 and acts like she still dots her i’s with little hearts. He played along with her; seems like that would be good enough.

  15. JenniferJustice says:

    I am all for supportive and encouraging partners. Perhaps he has changed his way as far as cheating and hurting. I’d like to give the benefit of a doubt but the most accurate assessment of a person’s future behaviors is their history. Although I’m sure some people do actually change their ways, it’s rare. Most people are who they are and their core character does not change. I’m sure for most of us, if we were going through struggles, our partner’s attitude and support would be important, but in this particular instance, concern lies in his not using her vulnerabilities against her or to his advantage. Let’s hope he isn’t putting her on a pedestal just to knock it out from underneath her when it suits him.

  16. QQ says:

    Same Wilmer Valderrama always behind a barely Underaged Actress from any of the kiddie Networks??

    Same Valderrama of BI legends as far as his treatment of her??

    joe Jonas Doing Heron Wilmer Valderrama?? I side eye The F*CK out of this situation

  17. Greek chic says:

    I only know her because my little cousin is obsessed with Frozen and Let it go…
    Valdrerrama is an a actor?

  18. Otaku Fairy says:

    I had no idea that Wilmer Valderamma was 35. I thought he was like 30. I’m also surprised that they’ve been dating for 4 or almost 5 years, but now that I think about it, that does seem kind of accurate. When I first heard about them dating, it was some time in late 2010 after Demi had been to rehab. She was 18 at the time and has a summer birthday- she’s almost 23 now- but of course that doesn’t necessarily mean that they weren’t together a little before that, although I hadn’t seen them together before that.

    Has Wilmer matured over the years? Possibly. I hope the relationship turns out healthy, and that Demi doesn’t make her health dependant on her relationship with her boyfriend.

  19. Whatever Gurl says:

    He has the ick factor!

    I vaguely remember reading an interview in which he bragged he intends to become the next Hugh Hefner.

    He also mentioned how much bank he was making as a producer and lead voice for the cartoon Handy Mandy.

    Just ick, ick, ick.

    I also remember when he bragged to Howard Stern that he was Mandy Moore’s first lover.

    Why do I remember these things? Why?