Hayden Panettiere was a guest on Live! With Kelly and Michael yesterday, where she was promoting her show Nashville on ABC. (Season three premiered last week and is waiting for me on the DVR.) Hayden is married to boxing great Wladimir Klitschko, and the couple welcomed a baby daughter, Kaya, last December. During her pregnancy, Hayden was open about her weight gain, even going into the specific numbers of how much she’d gained. Hayden continues to be open about what she went through immediately following her daughter’s birth, and revealed that she suffered from postpartum depression (PPD). Here’s some of what she said on Live!, thanks to E!:
During an appearance on Live! With Kelly and Michael Monday, the Nashville actress revealed that like her character, Juliette Barnes, she suffered from postpartum depression after the December 2014 birth of her daughter, Kaya Klitschko.
“I can very much relate. It’s something a lot of women experience. When [you are told] about postpartum depression you think it’s ‘I feel negative feelings towards my child; I want to injure or hurt my child.’ I’ve never, ever had those feelings. Some women do,” Hayden said. “But you don’t realize how broad of a spectrum you can really experience that on. It’s something that needs to be talked about. Women need to know that they’re not alone, and that it does heal.”
Regarding the stigma surrounding postpartum depression, Hayden said, “There’s a lot of misunderstanding. There’s a lot of people out there that think that it’s not real, that it’s not true, that it’s something that’s made up in their minds, that ‘Oh, it’s hormones.’ They brush it off. It’s something that’s completely uncontrollable. It’s really painful and it’s really scary and women need a lot of support.”Hayden, who revealed she hopes to have four kids with fiancé Wladimir Klitschko, continued, “Women are amazing. We do something that no man can do on this planet. I mean, we grow a human being in our body!” Speaking of the heavyweight champion, she told the co-hosts, “I would love it if Wlad figured out a way to get pregnant and he could have the baby. We would be going right now, no problem.”
“If he could, would he?” Kelly Ripa asked. “That’s the question.”
“Absolutely. Absolutely,” Hayden assured her. “I asked him this question…He’s going to be like, ‘I can’t believe you told them!’ But when I was pregnant, he did this thing where he would suck in his stomach and then I would put my stomach to his so that he could feel when she was moving—almost like she was in his stomach. He wanted to feel what it was like to have a baby as close to him as it was to me.”
That’s a cute story about her husband trying to feel the baby on his own stomach but it feels really personal. I wonder if he’s ok with her sharing it.
It sounds like Hayden’s postpartum depression was relatively mild, but that she’s admitting this and talking about it anyway. That takes a lot of courage and I appreciate how she explains it. She has such a sunny personality that it’s hard to see her as depressed at all. That could just be her public persona, though. Sometimes the people who suffer from depression are the ones we least expect as it can be a hidden illness.
Hayden said something similar in her US Magazine “25 Things You Don’t Know About” piece. She wrote “I suffered a bit of postpartum depression. You’re not alone or crazy, ladies!” Hayden also revealed that, at 5’2″ tall (Google has her at 5’0″ while People says she’s 5’2″) “I was 110 pounds before pregnancy and 153 pounds by the time I gave birth!” I can relate to crazy pregnancy weight gain and postpartum depression. I don’t see how anyone can be happy after giving birth and then getting woken up randomly every few hours to care for a newborn, but that’s oversimplifying the situation.
Here are some images from Nashville [via Getty]. I didn’t realize that Hayden’s character goes on Regis & Michael too! I will have to watch that episode.
This kind of stuff is important. Self-serving PR or not, we (women) are already told we’re crazy all the time, especially during/after birth. The massive physical, mental, and chemical changes required to produce a baby are no joke, and brushing it off as “something that just happens” leaves a lot of women feeling like failures.
Checking in and testing for PPD should be standard medical practice, and we won’t get there unless we kill the stigma.
It reminds me of what Gloria Steinem said, that if men got periods there would be an automatic paid week-long work leave every month (or something to that effect). Because it happens to women however…
Think about man flu though. Can you imagine if they had periods? No thank you. I’ll carry that burden, because menstrual misery is far easier than feeling with a sick man! And a pregnant one? Stuff of nightmares…
I had such a traumatic childbirth that honestly everything after was pretty much a breeze. So many people seem to think waking up is this great difficulty–is this genetic? I think it is. Like some people REALLY struggle with being able to wake up. I was fine. It was so…not a big deal compared to everything else. I did cry for four days after I gave birth and I couldn’t stand motionless for about six months afterward since I had so much healing to do, so no worries–we all get our crosses to bear!
Aww, I feel for her. It sounds like her case was fairly mild, but that doesn’t make it less important. I’ve always been shocked that postpartum depression is so secretive and unknown. Your hormones are going crazy, you have massive new responsibilities, etc. It’s a prime recipe for emotional turmoil, but we seem to act like it’s shocking when it happens.
It’s nice that she’s talking about it. I tend to count myself lucky, since I could have easily seen myself swinging into depression if I did not have so much help. I tend to think that American women get such a raw deal with being moms, and that contributes to this stuff. We very much have an attitude of “do it all yourself and don’t ask for help and get it right all the time.” My in-laws are from Syria and my mother-in-law basically had to insert herself after our first baby and insist I not clean or do anything else, just hang out with the baby. She and a few of the aunts did a ton for us. She explained later that in their culture, families are expected to help new parents adjust and it was “totally crazy” to her that American women feel so much pressure to do it all with a baby. She was always saying, “No wonder you’re all depressed!” I’ve always wondered if there’s something to that.
ITA. I had no family around but my partner was awesome and did absolutely everything. I don’t think I changed a single diaper until he went back to work maybe two weeks later. I honestly get angry when I hear about these men who “don’t change diapers.” Like that’s a choice? What is wrong with you?? Do you tell your child you “don’t make food” when s/he is hungry? Baffling
Men don’t do the shitwork. Literally.
Biggest pet peeve: When a guy says something like ‘oh my wife is out of town this weekend so I’m baby sitting the kids’
NO YOU’RE NOT. You’re parenting.
My mum had severe PPD when she had me, and the memory of it is still really strong for her over thirty years later. Back then no-one really talked about PPD, which made things even harder for her. Now I have a baby she’s been so amazingly supportive in the hope that my parenting experience won’t be a repeat of hers – I have a past history of depression so am high risk for PPD. I basically didn’t have to cook, clean or by groceries for six weeks. So I think there’s definitely something to what your mother-in-law is saying. It really does takes village to raise a child; I’d be a total mess without my mum!
I’m glad she is speaking out about it. I think a lot of women are afraid to talk to their partners or doctors about PPD because they feel like they’ll be considered bad mothers. Time to have more understanding so all women suffering from PPD get help, especially before it possibly escalates into something worse(postpartum psychosis).
A family member had such bad PPD that family members took shifts going to her home 24/7 to help with her son and make sure everything was okay. But she’s a great mom who just needed help while she and her doctors figured out the right treatment for her.
I had major postpartum depression. It was during the time Brooke Shields wrote her book about her struggles. Thankfully,I have a husband who noticed I was a little “off.” I really appreciate that we live in a time that seems to be a little bit more understanding about these things. There should never be any shame in mental health or treatment.
I had something called post partum anxiety. Rarely talked about but should. I thought I was gonna die. Thank god I took meds for it because for me, it saved my life.
I had this as well with my daughter. It was very scary, and I ended up being taken to the hospital via ambulance. Ironically the meds I was given (paxil) made things worse. I was given another medication that worked a million times better.
Sassy, I have mild anxiety normally and after the birth of my second daughter I was diagnosed with post partum OCD. I wish we heard ANYONE talk about post partum anxiety/ocd
I’m pregnant with my first now and had my first appointment with my OBGYN office’s on site therapist today. I have pre-existing anxiety issues, and there have been some problems with the baby during the pregnancy, so they are being very on top of me having a good support system/help in case I develop post-partum-anxiety, which I also didn’t know was a thing. So far my therapist seems nice & I’m hoping I’m lucky & it’s not a problem for me, but it’s so good to have a doctor’s office really be monitoring for this kind of stuff, because I would have been too stressed to look for help on my own wth everything else that’s been going on!
Somegirl, congrats on your pregnancy! I love that you are addressing the anxiety during your pregnancy, it will make the transition to motherhood so much smoother, in case it does flare up. Wishing you a healthy and restful pregnancy!
And to a lesser extreme of PPD, many, many women suffer from the Baby Blues, which have similar feelings of PPD but it generally goes away after your hormones readjust (I am sure there is a medical name for this, I just don’t know what it is.)
I will forever be grateful for Brooke Shields because she was promoting “Down Came the Rain” while I was in the swing of the Baby Blues. I thought I was a monster and then I read that Ms. Shields said she pictured herself throwing her baby against the wall right after I had imagined the same thing. Good for Ms. Panettiere; she’s right, women need to know they are not alone on this (and to seek help if it feels beyond their control, of course.)
Same here!! I was going through major postpartum depression during that time. I’m so grateful that Brooks book came out at that time. Having a child is rough. But double that with postpartum and the very basics seems overwhelming.
Bless her; she made so much of a difference for so many.
And like you, my husband completely stepped up and was the tether for both me and my son for those first three months. He never once complained or made me feel bad about what was going on with me. I asked him about it years later and he claims he doesn’t even remember having to do anything – Brooke and husbands are rock stars.
One of the reasons I went off Tom Cruise was his uneducated criticism of her about the whole thing.
He apparently apologised to her and she accepted it but it struck me as a “I’m sorry you were offended but I’m not wrong” apology
@ j.eyre Your description of ‘the Baby Blues’ sounds a lot like PPD, which as Hayden said covers a broad spectrum of symptoms, some more extreme than others but all equally difficult and distressing for the mother, newborn, spouse and other children.
Either one can occur immediately following birth – it’s not merely that long-lasting Baby Blues is PPD. Baby Blues includes teariness, moodiness, stress, etc. But thoughts of harming the baby generally means PPD.
This raises a few things:
1) the stigma that still surrounds mental health, so that many women do not get the care they need because they & everyone around them feel it must be Baby Blues, “it couldn’t possibly” be PPD
2) often primary care providers are not the best at recognizing PPD, dismissing it as Baby Blues…maybe they don’t want to be alarmist, or they don’t like the PPD label, or they’re just overly complacent & dismissive of “new mom concerns”
I think it is very important that we talk openly and honestly about PPD with each other. Even a “mild” case can make a new mother (be it your first child, or 4th) feel so isolated. And when you do reach out, many might have never experienced it more brush you off. Doctors included.
Granted many never experience psychosis, but that is the type most often talked about, and there is a stigma attached with it.
So I am all for talking about PPD, because nobody should have to suffer or feel shame.
Excellent post. I am all for open communication in regard to PPD. Like you noted, talking about PPD doesn’t always lead to solutions and can further isolate a mother because she could feel “stupid” for having opened-up in the first place to the wrong audience. I know firsthand about this and still struggle with the pressure.
Funny about this, my doctor never inquired about it nor did he talked about it during my pregnancy. My mother told me right after I gave birth that i might experience it and gave me some tips. I’m so glad she was there because I did go through it and as mild as it was it does get a hold of you. I don’t always get along with my mother but that was one of the times I thank her for being there and for taking the time with me. I stayed with her for almost 3 months after I gave birth and looking back I can’t imagine what I would have done if I would’ve gone back to my own place and be by myself when my significant other was at work
She/they need to list the levels because I don’t think most people realize what all can be diagnosed as PPD and it’s symptoms vary with different people. Some people have violent thoughts while others are miserable sad or mean and nasty. Some have halucinations and some want to sleep all the time. I still dont’ feel all the information is out there for people but at least it’s being talked about. Baby steps…pardon the pun.
I think as women we tend to minimize our personal troubles to not burden others. And many women might be afraid bring up PPD, especially if it seems mild or moderate.
I love her character on Nashville. She is doing an awesome portrayal of PPD on the show also.
I’m always glad to hear women talking about this. I’ve suffered from PPD and also ANTEpartum depression and anxiety. This is when you have the issues during your pregnancy (and sometimes they continue after). It’s really tricky because so many symptoms get blown off as just being tired or hormonal. Many people don’t realize it can happen during pregnancy and are not diagnosed. More screening needs to be done and more women need to share their stories to reduce the stigma. I endured weeks of panic attacks before I finally asked for help.
I also have a naturally bubbly and laid-back personality. One of my midwifes actually told me that I “didn’t seem like the type” to get PPD. She was wrong. It can happen to anyone and it’s a real medical condition triggered by hormonal changes that alter chemicals in the brain.
Love to all the mamas who have dealt with this or who still are XO
I had dreadful, dreadful baby blues for about 6 weeks. It started on day 2 when my son cluster fed every 15 minutes from 11:30pm to 6:00am and I felt the effects of massive sleep deprivation. Then the day my milk came in, I was an absolute basket case (they had me on a mental health alert and brought a psychologist in to see me). All I remember is saying to everybody that my son doesn’t deserve me. I literally sobbed ALL DAY. They gave me a sleeping tablet that night and took my son to the nursery. For about a month afterwards, I felt completely disassociated from my surroundings. Home looked like home, but didn’t feel like home. Everything that should have felt normal felt unfamiliar. When the community nurse visited at 4 weeks post-partum and asked if I was enjoying my son, I broke down and told her I wasn’t. To top it off, I had a hemorrhoidectomy when he was 2 weeks old and could barely function. It was an acutely overwhelming time for me. Fortunately, everything subsided and I felt normal again but my heart goes out to women suffering PPD. It’s real, it’s tough, and they need a lot of support, open communication and understanding.