Zayn Malik & Taylor Swift’s music video is here: sexy or not so much?

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The soundtrack for Fifty Shades of Grey ended up being one of the best parts of the movie. They even scored an Oscar nomination with The Weeknd’s “Earned It,” which fit the film really well. Producers are likely trying to continue the trend with Fifty Shades Darker, and they’ve already released two singles. One is Halsey’s “Not Afraid Anymore,” which is a lot better and a lot catchier than it has any right to be. But the mega-collab (insert eyeroll) is Zayn Malik and Taylor Swift’s “I Don’t Want to Live Forever.” The song was released several weeks ago and it easily climbed most of the charts. I personally don’t think the song is the best offering from either of them musically – it feels overproduced, and Taylor seems unnecessary. Like, we know Zayn can sing about sex. So let him sing about sex alone.

Anyway, both Tay and Zayn have been teasing the sh-t out of the release of the music video, and it finally dropped last night. Let’s have some fun with it:

0:05 I actually thought Taylor was going to be the one to get out of the car.

0:27: Zayn is so attractive. I used to not be into him at all, but his beauty has grown on me. I like him better with facial hair too.

0: 36 This hotel looks hella cheap, right? That wall mosaic sucks.

0: 59 All of those lamps in the long-ass front lobby and Zayn is still wandering around in shadows. What’s the wattage on those lamps, man? Are they 20-watt?

1:06: I’m pleased that so far, Taylor hasn’t shown up.

1:23: There she is. You know she’s trying to be sexy because her raincoat hasn’t been put on properly. So unkempt!

1:45: I won’t say anything about her bangs. Honestly, they don’t look so bad here. They’re a good length.

2:00: Are they staying in an en-suite hotel room? Like, they’re sharing a bathroom and then they just go to their separate rooms to sing about how they’re ready to bang their way to an early grave?

2:07 WHY IS THIS VIDEO SO DARK?

2:12 That’s so wasteful, Swifty. That champagne could have gone to an orphan.

2:20 I think Swifty is contractually obligated to play with flowers in every one of her music videos.

2:27: Taylor lounges awkwardly in thigh-high stockings and an exposed bra strap. I’m sorry, but I guffawed. She’s attempting a sultry pose and she looks like a praying mantis at rest.

2:44: Oh, I get it. He ordered a hooker and he’s waiting in the hotel room for the girl to show up (see the hooker pamphlet he tossed aside). Is Taylor the hooker?

2:53. She’s working herself up for the sex. Girl, he’ll pay you even if you don’t enjoy it.

3:00 Oooh, it suddenly got exciting. The hooker didn’t show up so he started smashing things. Meanwhile, Taylor arches her back like a cat on another bed. GIRL YOU ARE IN THE WRONG HOTEL ROOM.

3:14: She has a nice manicure.

3:30 I could honestly watch Taylor awkwardly writhing on the bed all damn day.

3:40 So did she go up a size in implants or what?

3:50 They finally look at each other for the first time and he’s like “your agency said you’d be here an hour ago, I’m not paying for that time. You need to give me a discount.”

4:02 And now she’s sad because she knows he’s not going to give her a tip OR bang her into an early grave.

Basically, this whole thing is very Twihard-y, which fits with the Fifty Shades world. Are we supposed to find this sexy? I find Zayn sexy… but he needs some better lighting. Taylor needs to… try something else, I think.

Cover courtesy of British GQ.

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100 Responses to “Zayn Malik & Taylor Swift’s music video is here: sexy or not so much?”

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  1. Sam says:

    I just I don’t know. That music video was so embarrassing. Zayn looks like he doesn’t care even though out of the two of them, he’s the one who needs to care. Taylor has zero sex appeal. Like what the heck was her worming around on the bed? Anytime she tries it’s just embarrassing. The song grew on me but the music video is bad and embarrassing.

    • Carolyn says:

      Zayn is gorgeous but he has zero charisma. He also lacks in stage presence. He gets aways with his lack of umph, because of his looks. People drool over him and don’t notice he’s barely putting in any effort. Taylor, should never try to be sexy, because it’s just so uncomfortable to watch.

      • p says:

        Boring……..

      • African Sun says:

        @Carolyn THIS. Just proves for male singers it’s not just about looks because in the looks department, he is a 10 out of 10 but he just does not have the X factor.

      • Digital Unicorn (aka Betti) says:

        I agree – he has talent as a singer/song writer (i like the track and would have liked it better if it was just him singing) but ITA he lacks the X factor on his own.

        He’s trying to hard to be the next Justin Timberlake. JT maybe a mega douche but he does have that X factor, as did Britney before her problems.

      • African Sun says:

        @Digital Unicorn, yes douche but talented, same for Brit, Riri, B etc. They have the star power.

        Zayn needs to make a choice in terms of what type of singer he wants to be. If he is going to do R&B, his album needs to be seminal like what Justified or FutureS$X was for JT but make it memorable. It need to have oomph if he is going to do R&B.

        Can Zayn dance like Justin Bieber or Chris? Not sure. Male R&B/Pop singers need to be able to sing and dance, it is what it is.

        Not sure about what Zayn’s team are thinking but it’s not believable. He is still just sooo good to look at and I am rooting for him to win as a visible Asian Muslim popstar.

        Want him to win but he’s just….blah.

    • Red says:

      Yeah I agree. It’s also not doing any favors for Taylor because Zayn is natural really good at smoldering, so compared to him, she really does look incredibly awkward. The girl is incapable of being sexy. I don’t usually mind Taylor’s songs, but I think her voice sounds awful in this and I honestly think she’s trying to win awards for it (via oscar or golden globe, like The Weeknd).

    • Nicole says:

      Lol agreed. That was painful and not hot at all.

    • Tanguerita says:

      DITTO. I can’t work up any kind of enthusiasm for him or his voice. As for Swift – seriously, sometimes I think she’s never actually slept with any of her boyfriends and is still a virgin. Nothing wrong with being a virgin, mind you. But I imagine someone with zero knowledge about sex would think this kind of meaningful writhing on the bed is what happens when two people are about to get to it.

    • Suzie says:

      Zayn had lots of charisma in the One Direction videos, but I have to agree that he looks like he’s not trying hard enough in his solo videos. I don’t know why but it’s a shame because he definitely has “it”.

      • Lauren II says:

        Zane has lush eyelashes, a shyful charisma, and an amazing voice.
        Taylor looks erotically awkward, as usual; every time she disappears for a while, she emerges looking surgically altered.
        Weird vibes all around.

  2. Brea says:

    I actually like the song, it’s catchy and the video reflects the “dark” vibe of the song but Taylor is one of those people who just can’t exude sexiness no matter how hard she tries.

    • Tris says:

      The “dark” vibe, accompanied by the Most Lamps in a Music Video (2017)!

    • Jen says:

      She really just cannot pull off sexy. It makes me physically cringe whenever I see her try to dance like that.

    • MissMarierose says:

      Yeah, I like the song too. It’s definitely catchy but it also sounds vaguely familiar to me. Don’t know why.
      I think I would have like the song better if I hadn’t seen that painfully dark and awkward video.

  3. Greata says:

    Taylor Swift is a pretty girl, but she has zero sex appeal IMO. Zayn is sexy, but so achingly young, that I just can’t see him in that way.

    • Miss V says:

      This, 100%. She’s pretty, but not sexy. At all. And when she tries to be sexy, it’s so awkward that I have secondhand embarrassment for her.

  4. edith says:

    that was so unsexy….

  5. Katherine says:

    I wish this only featured Zayn, he fits the mood and decor of this video. I would’ve liked the song if it were solo, too

  6. Nev says:

    I don’t watch the video. But yeah he is a stunning man.

  7. OSTONE says:

    Zayn is incredibly good looking. The video was weird, so I guess that’s the vibe they were going for. Wonder if Swifty will get backlash a la Britney for an exposed bra

  8. Digital Unicorn (aKa Betti) says:

    She has the sex appeal of wet salad leaf. She isn’t comfortable in her body and has she always been this awkward? It’s like she’s still 10 and one day woke up I a 20 somethings body and it trying to figure out how it all works.

  9. mia girl says:

    “2:12 That’s so wasteful, Swifty. That champagne could have gone to an orphan.”

    For a split second before the camera pans out to show Swift pouring, I’m kinda embarrassed to say, but it looked to me like Zayn was peeing into the glass!

    So no, don’t find this video sexy, but Trump might.

  10. Skins says:

    Not a bad song, but Taylor is just not sexy at all

  11. Zapp Brannigan says:

    My morning bowl of porridge has more steamy heat than this guff.

  12. KBeth says:

    Swift can not do sexy, she is a boner killer.

  13. Miss M says:

    At this point, there is absolutely nothing that will make Swift sexy. Nothing…

  14. Emily says:

    Why is it a thing now to make things so dark you can’t see what’s happening? There are so many TV shows I’ve given up on because it’s shot in so much darkness that you can’t see what’s happening on the show, especially if you watch during the daytime. How could you possibly see Taylor’s manicure to judge it?

  15. Adrien says:

    Taylor here reminds me of Sandra Lee baking a Kwanzaa cake. I don’t know why Cuomo’gf was the first thing that came to my mind when she appeared. Song is good. I am just not a fan of falsetto ( except on Adam Lambert).

  16. Toot says:

    Zayn is sexy, Taylor just isn’t.

  17. Slowsnow says:

    Who told these two kids they could sing and had any presence or style? Mama mia…

  18. HappyMom says:

    Something nice: I like Swifty’s lipstick.

  19. MellyMel says:

    Honestly I’m just here for my boy Zayn! He’s so damn good looking. The song has grown on me but I still think it should have been a solo for him.

  20. Brunswickstoval says:

    It’s as if they are singing about 2 different people (i.e. not each other). Zero chemistry and interest to sustain anything more than one watch out of curiosity.

    Zayn’s pretty but he needs more than a duet with Taylor to make it this year.

  21. Jayna says:

    Taylor can’t do sexy, but she looked beautiful makeup and hairstyle-wise.

    Zayn is sexy.

    The song is pretty good. I couldn’t finish the video. I got two-thirds of the way through and lost interest.

    • PrincessMe says:

      Yep, pretty much what you said. I lost interest in the video (like the song well enough) and decided to listen to “earned it” instead.

  22. D-Truth says:

    Taylor looks amazing here. I imagine we’ll see alot more of those implants during the TS6 era.

  23. Monsy says:

    Damnnnn…. Zayn is so good looking but he looks so bored throughout the whole video! like he doesnt even want to be there,wtf?
    And yeah Taylor looks pretty……. and she’s great, she does a lot of things good: she’s a decent song writer, brilliant PR strategist, a great business woman but she can’t do the ” sexy woman act ” on a music video, she looks super awkard trying so hard to be sexy. Please, sweetie, just leave it.

  24. ell says:

    the video is forgettable, i’ve loved the song for a while though.

    lol at the comments on how unsexy taylor is. i think because people don’t like her (sometimes they have a point, some other times they don’t) are hellbent on putting down everything she does. well, i’m not straight, and i think she’s pretty sexy in this video. sexier than zayn who’s very handsome, but lacks any sort of charisma.

    • Redy says:

      I don’t think that’s necessarily fair. Everyone has different tastes. Just because I don’t think Taylor can pull off sexy AT ALL does not mean I’m jealous or just biased because I don’t like her. I would admit if she could pull off sexy, but she just cannot for me.

    • D-Truth says:

      Most straight men think Taylor is very sexy.

      • ell says:

        that’s exactly what i meant in a way. most straight men think she’s sexy, i’m a bisexual woman and i found her sexy in this video, those saying she isn’t seem to be straight women. they’re also saying zayn is sexy which to me is lol. i know people have different taste of course, but there seem to be a correlation maybe…

      • Aye says:

        Wait, what? I don’t know any straight man that finds Taylor sexy. Sure, she’s conventionally attractive. Everyone I know (and things I read online) kind of make fun of her because she’s so uncomfortable in her body.

      • ell says:

        why would you make fun of someone who’s uncomfortable in their body??

        see, i’m right. it’s because people don’t like taylor, so they make fun of her. and i mean, there’s so much to call her out for, such as the way she uses feminism in a shallow way that means nothing. making fun of how uncomfortable she is in her body is so petty. be better than that.

      • Aye says:

        @ell So because I pointed out that some people online and some straight men don’t find her sexy, I need to be better? I can’t stop laughing, thanks for that response. SHES TRYING TO BE SEXY. I can laugh at her efforts. Just like I’ll laugh at Tom Hiddleston trying to be sexy. Because he’s def not either. Some people may not agree that your fav celebrity isn’t sexy. Can’t win them all, I promise it’s not the end of the world.

      • ell says:

        no, you pointed out that people make fun of her for being uncomfortable in her body, which is a completely different thing. i mean, it’s all written by you, read yourself again.

        i find this sort of misogynist. it’s hard for a woman to feel completely comfortable in her body, and most women can relate to that. it’s not the same for men, so no your TH’s example doesn’t apply. i don’t find it a hahaha laughing matter like you do. also she’s really not my fav, i commented a few days ago how her shallow feminism annoys me, but if it makes you feel better thinking i’m a stan so you can laugh freely, be my guest.

      • Chels says:

        Most straight men think Zayn is even sexier

      • Otaku Fairy says:

        So I watched the video with the volume down. There were some moments where she came off as a little awkward, but she didn’t do as badly as I was expecting. I’m bisexual but usually don’t find Taylor Swift sexy either, (that’s not just dislike talking though, because there have been women I disliked but found sexy, just like with men), but for the first time here she’s actually managed to be able to pull off ‘slightly sexy’ when she was probably going for ‘super sexy’. Normally she doesn’t even reach ‘slightly sexy’. So her attempt wasn’t a complete failure.
        In early high school and late middle school though there were definitely straight male classmates who found Taylor Swift sexy.

  25. M.A.F. says:

    Do they not know how to lip sync to their own music? Either knock it off with the slow down effect or learn to lip sync properly.

    I fast forward waiting for something to happen. They really do not make music videos like they use to (yes, there are exceptions but unless you remember the days before TRL you won’t convince me otherwise).

  26. attackofthekb says:

    Unpopular opinion: I have always been attracted to her including the way she looks in this video. Beauty is subjective. I’m not saying anyone is wrong to find her unattractive. But I wanted to throw out another perspective.

    • Anatha says:

      No one here is saying she’s unattractive. She’s beautiful. She can be cute, but to me and many others she has zero sex appeal. She’s beautiful, but we don’t think “sex” when we see her and when she tries to be sexy it is awkward and not enticing.

      • ell says:

        if you’re straight woman maybe you’re not the target audience to find her sexy though.

        like i’m a bisexual woman who generally is more attracted to women, and i’m fairly aware that i’m not the target audience in films that feature any of the hemsworth brothers as eye candy.

      • attackofthekb says:

        I am a bisexual woman as well and I find her sexually attractive. Not just attractive. I guess my wording could have been better. I meant that I can understand that some find her sexless. I just don’t happen to be one and figured I’d throw that out there.

    • detritus says:

      I dunno, I like ladies and I think she’s beautiful, but the dancing is weird and awkward.
      I don’t find her overly sexy, even though all the pieces are and her makeup is excellent.

  27. Bethy says:

    That’s how I look sometimes when I have bad cramps. Thanks, Taylor for the visual!

  28. Radley says:

    I’m so over Taylor Swift that she really can do no right as far as I’m concerned. LOL She needs to just lay low for a while.

    Zayn is very pretty. Also, his singing puts Tay Tay to shame. So watch to see and hear Zayn, I guess.

  29. me says:

    His name is first in the credits for this song. Is it HIS song and she’s just featured? They both seem to sing equally on it. Just thought since she’s the bigger name her name would be first.

  30. Rachel says:

    Kaiser, this is by far the best play by play I’ve ever read. You made my morning.

  31. Harryg says:

    That song is very annoying.

  32. Millenial says:

    Honestly, I’ve missed Taylor Swift and her drama. I hope this signals the return. I’d take the good ol’ days of us b**ching about Taylor’s parade of boyfriends and snake emoji drama over Cheetolini dystopia any day.

  33. PastryPuff says:

    It wasn’t terrible until Taylor started thrashing around on the bed. She’s a very pretty girl, but seeing her writhing around like that makes me cringe.

  34. QQ says:

    I Like Zayn too much to do this to myself and hit play ( I’ve successfully avoided the song, ya’ll know i Have a Taylor Swift Allergy)

  35. kimbers says:

    I never hear that song. I heard it 1x in December, but never downloaded it, and ever since i havent heard it on the radio. It must be bc I’m a channel changer and the intro cant hook me. Doubt I’m alone out there in this.

  36. Zombie Shortcake says:

    Now THIS is what tormented shady hotel rendezvous sexiness looks and sounds like:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abzK_jZdKFw

    Zayn and Taylor look more like they’re experiencing frustration, disappointment and angst over a relationship that didn’t work out; Like, they just decided to go to some hotel to sound off about and bemoan their failed relationships.

    • Zombie Shortcake says:

      I admit that I don’t know the story line of Darker, so maybe Taylor and Zayn’s acting and the tone of the video fit perfectly with the plot/themes of the movie.

  37. Chels says:

    zayn is so beautiful

  38. lemonbow says:

    I played the 50 shades soundtrack on repeat till my husband’s ears were about to explode and I’m already playing this song on repeat. Love it love it love it! Video is kind of blah though, like the movies 😉

  39. Tata says:

    I miss the Weeknd’s 50 shades song 🙁 that was a good song actually. This one, meh.

  40. perplexed says:

    She’s really pretty with the perfect physique…yet she’s not sexy at all. It’s weird. Even Kate Middleton as a royal is probably better at pulling off sexy than Taylor. WTF.

    • jetlagged says:

      It is weird, right? I’ve come to the conclusion that being sexy and being cool work much the same way. Someone either is or isn’t, it can’t be faked and it can’t be turned on or off. Taylor is neither sexy nor cool – that is not shade, some of the best people I know aren’t – but every time she tries to project either one she just ends up looking try-hard and awkward.

  41. tan says:

    The song is extremely screechy specially from Zayn’s side! I am sorry but it hurt my ear.
    The beats are actually interesting and nice and I quite liked Taylors voice initially

    Also Zayn looks like a wannabe copy of a Pakistani actor Fawad Khan.

    Taylor: trying too hard.

  42. Reece says:

    Am I terrible because I started laughing? Mostly at Taylor being “sexy” but really all of it, esp the trashed hotel rooms. Why????

  43. Laura says:

    Zayn is gorgeous, but tiny in real life. They probably couldn’t shoot together much because she would tower over him.

  44. Amanda D says:

    Mediocre video for a mediocre song. It’s a shame because she is a decent songwriter and he has a great voice. One would think that pairing would work!

  45. A Fan says:

    Where do I start?

    There is nothing sexy about this video because neither one of them are sexy. C’mon. Taylor Swift may be cute, she may wear nice clothes…but there is nothing sexy about her. And the only thing sexy about Zayn Malik is Gigi Hadid.

    They really look cheesy in this video.

    [*Back to the original question: A RESOUNDING NO.*]

  46. Lenn says:

    This makes me think back to a video that really was hot: Madonna’s Justify my love. Taylor is many things, but she is not sexy.

  47. Annike says:

    Not sexy at all.

    They’re like children playing at being grown-up and sexy.
    The song is mediocre, at best. Which is as much as you expect from mainstream pop these days.
    It’s really laughable to see them breaking things and writhing on the bed. I guess I’m not the intended audience for this, not being a tween and all.

    Something nice:

    Taylor always does a good red lip, I like this lipstick she’s wearing here.
    Zayn is really pretty.

  48. Sue says:

    Taylor Swift is still alive?😳😂Ok,she is🙄 But bra strap showing, bed-hair,but perfect red lipstick? A girl in her lingerie with only a trenchcoat on? Cliché and not sexy at all,sorry…And a male singer singing so high like an eunuch? This is sexy???Gosh…😂

  49. I Choose Me says:

    Controversial opinion perhaps, Swifty was better in this vid than Zayn. He looked bored to shit and about to go into a sulk at any moment. She at least committed to her role whatever that’s supposed to be. I really don’t get this video but the song is a bit catchy.

  50. shorifa says:

    auto tuned soo HARD I thought sam smith was singing the high notes not 1d boy.

  51. shorifa says:

    auto tuned soo HARD I thought sam smith was singing the high notes not 1d boy.

  52. mya says:

    eh, z is not sexy. He is a puppy with a beard.

  53. AFish says:

    Paparazzi follow zayn while no one notices Taylor coming in #reallifeproblems