'09
The absolute funniest video I have watched all month is not Keyboard Gato (though I have watched that 31 times since I discovered it a few hours ago). No, Keyboard Gato hangs his sombrero-adorned head in shame when you show him the most amazing video: an interview with Miley Cyrus’ boyfriend Justin Gaston. Gaston, not surprisingly, is incredibly stupid. In a “Zoolander” sort of way, where you think, “No one could possibly be this sort of stereotypically male model dumb unless someone is writing lines for him.” I mean he is wet-your-pants funny. But absolutely not trying to be. I cannot believe Details didn’t put him up to it: but we clearly are witnessing Justin’s natural stupidity.
Justin starts off by singing us a little of John Lennon’s “Jealous Guy,” complete with a deeply confused thinking face. A few more gems:
Details: Who would you want to play you in a movie?
Gaston: I think if Ashton Kutcher played me, he would be probably a funnier me. He’s a pretty funny guy. But I’m gonna say Johnny Depp. Just ‘cause I really like Johnny Depp and we’re just gonna be crazy like, Johnny Depp’s gonna play like an older me. Like me when I’m older. ‘Cause he’s a really cool actor. Then I’ll seem really cool.Details: Who would you want to trade places with?
Gaston: I’d like to be one of those little – you know – little lap dogs that just get petted all day… is that weird?Gaston: I’m going to be honest with you, I have, like, nightmares about the paparazzi. I was going to Tweet about it the other day, but I thought people would be mean to me. Which they often are. I don’t know why. Please don’t be mean to me on Twitter. I’m just a guy. Just a guy with a dream. I don’t know what that means… I always have these flashing things in my dreams. I don’t know why. They’re so scary.
Details: Favorite piece of clothing from the shoot?
Gaston: My little white shirt. Because obviously I love white shirts, but this one, was, I think God wove it, and then he sent it down through his angels to me today, because it was amazing. It felt like what I imagine heaven feels like.”
[From Details video]
Interestingly the sermon at my church this past Sunday was “If God were a tailor… he’d make heavenly shirts for Justin Gaston.” And it turns out it’s not a metaphor, God really does send angels to Justin bearing white tees. He doesn’t do it for anyone else though. Just Justin. Why? Well aside from nailing Miley Cyrus, Justin also has a tattoo:
…that runs down to the top of his buttock. “It’s Psalm 7:8, ‘Judge me, O Lord, according to my righteousness,’”… “I don’t want to be judged—so I put it on my body in an attempt to become that bold.”
[From Details]
I think Justin misinterpreted that Psalm a little bit. But hey, what can we expect from a guy with the depth to deeply admire Ashton Kutcher and beg us not to be mean to him on Twitter? You’ve got a real winner there Miley. Don’t let this heavenly show horse get away from you.
Written by JayBird
Posted in Interviews, Justin Gaston
- Diet secrets from Jessica Alba's nutritionist [Hollywood Life]
- Hef's twins have beautiful hair [D-Listed]
- The Twilight kids: more "Hills" than cool [Lainey Gossip]
- Ellen premieres on Idol tonight [Popeater]
- Cute photos of Anna Paquin and Steven Moyer exercising [Popsugar]
- JWoww wants bigger implants [Celebslam]
- Look at Handy Manny now [Go Fug Yourself]
16 Responses to “Justin Gaston has bad dreams about photogs; God weaves his white t-shirts”
-
ok, Justin Gaston needs to never open his mouth again. WTF was that?!
-
And now we know why I don’t subscribe to Details Magazine. (Stop saying “like” all the time! Why won’t that bad habit stop?)
-
That interview CANNOT be real.
-
He must be joking. Funny stuff
-
seems onionesque
-
What a complete MORON. He thinks people were mean to him before…wait until they get a load of this interview! Sheesh - I can only HOPE that he’s joking, but something tells me he’s not…
-
I really hope he’s joking…no one can be THAT stupid can they?
-
Hahahahahahahahaha! Deep breath. Hahahahahahahaha!
Funny write up Jaybird.
Justin also has a tattoo:…that runs down to the top of his buttock. “It’s Psalm 7:8, ‘Judge me, O Lord, according to my righteousness,’”… “I don’t want to be judged—so I put it on my body in an attempt to become that bold.”
Justin you are awesome, there is no end to just how awesome you are. *snort*
-
oh my god….that made me feel very uncomfortable. I hope thats not real, i have no ill will towards him.
-
Well, it’s a good thing he’s gorgeous. I’m sorry I read that interview now. Kinda ruins it for me.
-
And people said he was waaaayy to old and mature to be with a sixteen year old girl…
-
He is beautiful.
-
Can you imagine the conversations he and Miley have, now they would be wet-your-pants funny!
-
So pretty…so shallow.
-
Such a gorgeous fella..I am hoping he was joking in some of his answers (hey you never know!) But I think his intentions are good, he is maybe just not conveying himself in the most eloquent of ways/
Leave a Reply
Celebitchy aims to be a friendly, welcoming site where people can discuss entertainment stories and current events in a lighthearted, safe environment without fear of harassment, excessive negativity, or bullying. Different opinions, backgrounds, ages, and nationalities are welcome here - hatred and bigotry are not. If you make racist or bigoted remarks, comment under multiple names, or wish death on anyone you will be banned. There are no second chances if you violate one of these basic rules.By commenting you agree to our comment policy
Use the "Report this comment as spam or abuse" link to ask the moderators to delete a comment if it's offensive. If your comment disappears, it has been eaten by the spam filter. Please e-mail cbcomments at gmail.com to get it retrieved.
Get an icon next to your name by signing up for a free Gravatar
This song is called “Jealous Guy”..
Report this comment as spam or abuse