No one believes Melania Trump needs a week in a hospital for vague ‘kidney issues’

President Donald J. Trump welcomes President Emmanuel Macron

Yes, it’s mean, but I enjoyed the fact that almost no one bought the “story” that Melania Trump needs to spend a week in the hospital because of some benign kidney issue. Melania’s East Wing office confirmed that Melania had checked into the hospital on Monday morning and had undergone surgery, and that she would be staying in the hospital for much of the week. As I said, few people bought it. Which is why reporters have been calling Melania’s spokeswoman for days, and now the spokeswoman is all “Melania’s SO PRIVATE, y’all.”

She may be one of the most famous women in the world, but First Lady Melania Trump has always valued life outside the spotlight. So it should come as no surprise then, that the first lady’s office has asked the American public to respect her “personal privacy” as she remains hospitalized for the week after undergoing a surgical procedure for a benign kidney condition on Monday.

Asked why the routine procedure would require such a long hospital stay, the first lady’s communications director, Stephanie Grisham, told CNN on Tuesday, “I am not going to expand beyond the statement I put out. The first lady is in good spirits and she is resting. There are HIPAA laws to consider, but she also deserves personal privacy.”

[From People]

It’s true that Melania’s health is not an issue of national security. Her husband’s health IS a matter of national security, and by all accounts, he has not been properly examined by a legitimate and sober doctor in probably a decade. So… yeah, maybe the White House shouldn’t get so snippy about HIPAA. That being said, Melania seems like she probably takes care of herself, gets regular check-ups and always remembers to schedule her mammogram. But… if you live in the White House and the taxpayers are paying for the roof over your head and the food that you eat, doesn’t that mean that you should probably concoct a better cover story than vague “kidney issues”? We don’t need to see this woman’s pap smears, but don’t act like we’re the weird ones for not believing a half-assed cover story. Come up with a better lie, at least.

Donald Trump, Melania Trump, Emmanuel Macron, and Brigitte Macron attend a dinner at the White House

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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91 Responses to “No one believes Melania Trump needs a week in a hospital for vague ‘kidney issues’”

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  1. NoShame says:

    I would hate to stay in a hospital even in a luxury room for even one night. Unless…..my other option was going back to the Trump White House. Then I’d likely never want to check out of the hospital.

  2. savu says:

    What if she got there with a note saying “HELP ME!”? 😂

  3. Naomi11 says:

    I would too if I was married to the DUMP!

  4. Dee says:

    VOTE:
    Suicide attempt? Or more plastic surgery?

    • Neelyo says:

      Plastic surgery for sure.

    • S says:

      The latter is much more plausible. I don’t buy the the whole Melania is so unhappy vibe. I think she’s perfectly happy being Mrs. Trump, or at the very least all the perks that come with that moniker. After all, marrying rich was her only real life goal.

      I don’t think she wanted him to be President, but not because she’s some secret #resistance member, she just wanted to continue to live their mostly separate lives in her penthouse, rather being on display in the White House. Now, do I believe she’s a generally miserable human being? Oh yeah, that’s super credible, since like attracts like.

      I doubt she gives a flying fig about anyone other than her immediate family—and I mean, biological family, pretty sure she’d happily through her step-kids under the bus. Her husband could burn it all down, and if her life is still plush enough, she’d do little more than shrug. (I’d have said raise an eyebrow, but I don’t think she’s physically capable of that action.)

      • Lacia Can says:

        This is a great summary. I’d bet it’s 100% accurate.

      • ErgoSatz says:

        She MUST know her husband is owned by Putin and is involved in trying to dupe the DOJ and FBI. Likley she’s a bundle of nerves and is doing kyrigenics with intravenous Botox. How else could one human being withstand the pressure cooker???

      • Bella bella says:

        Re plastic surgery: There’s not much more she could do to her face. It’s tight as possible right now. So whatever procedure she had must have been somewhere else.

    • agnes says:

      without any doubt: plastic surgery

    • Merritt says:

      It could just be something gross that she is embarrassed about like a fistula.

    • tracking says:

      I don’t think she’s the type for the former, also don’t think Walter Reed is where one would go for optional cosmetic surgery (which also wouldn’t require a week-long stay).

      • S says:

        It would if you want to heal before reappearing in the public eye. Walter Reed is where the First Family goes, period, for security reasons, and it’s not like she’s sharing a standard room with a wounded vet. She’s in a luxury suite under armed guard. Her surgeon could easily get privileges there to do whatever procedure it is she is having.

      • still_sarah says:

        @ tracking : not all plastic surgery is cosmetic. I assume Walter Reed would have plastic surgeons to do needed reconstructive surgery for people injured doing their duties. Not sure. And maybe they could be convinced (or ordered) to do some work on FLOTUS.

        @ s : her doctor-of-pretty could getting privileges there sounds plausible too.

        Hell, I would have an eye lift or whatever just to get a week away from Bigly.

    • Dr Mrs The Monarch says:

      Plastic surgery is believable, but my Trump-despising, gossip-drama-loving self is imagining Mel getting an abortion. It would fit right in with this family. Either that or she went in for vaginoplasty but the doctor realized that she really needed an exorcism and lobotomy.

    • The Original G says:

      If it was plastic surgery, she’d simply not make public appearances for a bit, which no one would notice.

    • MrsK says:

      I don’t think it’s plastic surgery. There’s nothing there to pull, tuck, or suck. And if she wanted plastic surgery, she wouldn’t be at Walter Reed.

      I don’t know if it’s an actual suicide attempt, but I suspect it might be a psych hold.

    • Veronica T says:

      Ah, that makes sense!! I keep wondering what the heck keeps anyone in the hospital for 5 days anymore? Even with open heart surgery, you are sent home in a few days! But a nip and tuck?? There you go!

    • Betsy says:

      Suicide attempt, or Donald attacked her. I’m not joking about either.

  5. minx says:

    I’m loving that no one is buying this story.

    • Kelly says:

      I remember once I asked a coworker/friend if she was going to come to an event to welcome a new team member. I sort of already expected her to say no because she was only supposed to get back into town the day before from her sister’s wedding and I thought she might be jet lagged. Instead she gave me a story about how they had been taking wedding pictures barefoot outside and no one realized they had been standing in poison ivy.

      This story the WH is concocting about Melania is just as believable as my coworker’s poison ivy story.

      • still_sarah says:

        Gullible little me did not question the kidney problems story until I came here. I love you guys for your devious minds.

        And you’re right about the lying co-worker. Some liars think a bigger, more detailed lie is the better way to go. They are wrong. Trust me, I was a lawyer for 20 years. The big detailed lies are EASY to catch. Some liars are just too nervous to shut up. I love those people – It’s like Pinocchio with his nose growing!

    • DearWhitePeople says:

      Right out of the gate the “kidney” excuse seemed random. Trophy wives are CONSTANTLY doing “procedures” because they are solely valued for appearance. I live in a town where women do things at least every two months- fillers, botox, eye lifts lipo, you name it, this is like oxygen for the wealthy.

  6. Neelyo says:

    Most US patients are practically catapulted from their hospital beds once the anesthesia wears off. Lucky Melania.

    • Another Anne says:

      Right? My 70-something mom had her gallbladder removed and was sent home a day later. Without the luxuries Melania would have at the WH with domestic help, private nurse, etc.

    • TJ says:

      Laughed out loud. Great image!! That is a pretty good summary of the healthcare system 🙂

    • Ripley says:

      Seriously. I had a ruptured ectopic pregnancy with emergency surgery where I lost an incredible amount of blood and they bounced me the following morning. Not even 24 hours.

  7. smee says:

    maybe she’s got ‘blood coming out of her wherever’ ?

    I’m sure that if she’s having “female troubles” there’s no way he’d allow that to be the reason for her hospitalization.

  8. Sunny says:

    Suicide? Trump attacked her?

  9. Arpeggi says:

    They should have gone for the « Putin method »: have her disappear from the meia for 2 weeks (shouldn’t be hard) and then show up suddenly “refreshed”. Better than the week-long kidney stone

  10. Sigh... says:

    I though part of HIPPA was that no one could publicly release/discuss your personal medical iinformation without your permission…? If so, HIPPA is not stopping her (or her own office) from being more specific than “because kidney,” right? Why throw HIPPA in there like their hands are tied? “I said what I said,” and bounce.

    (Yeah, I know issa scam.)

    • Birdix says:

      If only reason and logic were still valued…

    • MrsK says:

      I think HIPAA applies only to health care providers. Her spokeswoman can invoke HIPAA if she thinks it will get the media off her back, but those laws don’t apply to her. Of course it would be outrageous if she did speculate on the FLOTUS’ medical issues, but she’s not bound by HIPAA.

      • Sigh... says:

        That’s what I mean. “No one,” as in the ones of privilege (her doctors, any medical staff) can release/share the info if SHE says so, it’s a choice of the patient (we’ve all seen doctors holding press conferences regarding some unusual procedure/condition/patient). HIPPA isn’t some dude in the corner cracking his knuckles, waiting to pounce at the mere mention of her actual condition(s), like HER OWN OFFICE is trying to make out.

        The “personal privacy” part is 100% fair, more than enough. The HIPPA part seemed unnecessary (and LIARS tend to add on unnecessary info…IJS).

      • Snowflake says:

        Oh, you’re right! Man, they are good at talking around a subject and making it sound legit.

    • Tig says:

      @MRSK- THANK YOU! Honestly, does anyone at this WH understand anything they put out as a press release.? HIPAA protects the patient-it doesn’t prevent the patient from disclosing anything or everything she wants. The only wrinkle here is if Melania herself has restricted the release of info, which sounds like exactly what’s been done.

  11. Who ARE These People? says:

    Could be something medical that she just doesn’t feel like disclosing to the public, maybe more related to her gynecological health. So either it was her kidney, it was something near the kidney, or it was something we may never know. I hope she’s enjoying her taxpayer-funded health care and break from the hubby. He feels like a pain in all of our sides.

    • minx says:

      Yeah, after joking about plastic surgery I tend to think it could be gynecological.

    • Carol says:

      It could be many things healthwise why she’s staying so long at the hospital. It could be something related to her kidneys or something else that is not related to plastic surgery. I’m not a fan of Melania, but guessing what procedure she had is kind of gross. Dont mean to be judgy since some of the comments here made me chuckle but I think we should leave her alone.

      • Indigo says:

        I agree. Any person should have the right to her medical care being a private matter.

    • Chrissy says:

      Or something like a bladder suspension or bunionectomy.

    • MrsK says:

      That seems reasonable. “An embolization procedure to treat a benign kidney condition” seems like an awfully specific cover-up, but the whole thing may well be connected to “women’s issues” that she doesn’t feel like disclosing, even in a roundabout way.

      • Nanster says:

        Everything that comes out of the White House is a lie – why should the explanation of Melania’s condition be any different?

      • Bint says:

        Exactly! I think all women have a right to privacy when it comes to medical issues. I don’t like the Donald either, but this story is so NOT Celebitchy worthy. It’s neither fun nor appropriate. I don’t care if she’s in for a kidney embolism for nephrologist purposes or plastic surgery. I just wish her well and don’t give a flip what it’s about.

        Instead of the catty article, how about women empower women and not try to knock them down. I’ll step back and wait for the troll responses to claim, illogically, that because I’m a feminist supporting Melania as a woman whose body is none of my business, I must be a Trumper.

  12. Lara says:

    The last picture – the guy in the back holding the flag, when I looked at it quickly I thought he was holding his nose in the universal you stink movement. May have laughed out very loudly at work.

  13. Onerous says:

    It’s super weird.

    My 8 year old just had major surgery and we were home by noon the same day. Generally, hospitals are reluctant to admit anymore because it increases the risk of infection. Studies also show that people typically recovery more quickly at home – but I guess if your home had Donald Trump in it, that probably wouldn’t be true…

  14. FHMom says:

    Truly it is none of our business. I don’t need to know.

    • megan says:

      I agree. Now, what is the big bump under Hillary’s coat, and why is she wearing the large scarves?

    • Pandy says:

      Of course it’s not our business – but this is a gossip site!!! And she’s a Trump, so have at her!
      My bet is plastic surgery. She’s not looking so hot these days.

      • still_sarah says:

        True indeed. A gossip site is inherently about things that are “none of our business”. And that’s why I come hear. It’s a guilty secret but a daily habit (-:

  15. Andrea says:

    I dunno?

    I had a laparoscopic gall bladder removal in ’04 when I was in my mid-20s. That’s really routine, but I still got my own room and, remained in the hospital for 4 nights before being discharged.

    A decade later I fell off my horse while practicing some jumps, broke my left shoulder pretty bad. My whole left arm was no longer connected to my body, except via muscle eeww!! I needed to have a major procedure to install a rod and pins in my upper arm. I was again, in the hospital for about 4-5 nights.

    Several years later, I fainted in the middle of the night, loss my sense of direction and landed smack on my chin on our saultilo tiled living room floor, breaking my jaw. I needed 2 surgeries to correct it, with more metal installed…and, spent ANOTHER week in the hospital.

    It sounds legit. And, the stay sounds routine.

    If she’s in hiding for weeks after this, then I’d say plastic surgery + recoup time.

    Either way, it’s her body. If she voluntarily tinkerers with it, that none on my business. They have the $$$$ to afford her touch ups & could have easily, secretly flown in her preferred surgeon to Walter Reed.

    • Sigh... says:

      “…the stay sounds routine.”

      But I believe the point is that it’s NOT routine to stay this long if all went as expected and she’s “healthy.”

      Your procedures (which I hope you recovered well from) were muuuuuch more “involved” than hers (I mean, an organ removed and 2 MAJOR joint reconstructions…you’re stronger than me 😬) , but you spent LESS time “in-house” than her since her “routine procedure.” It’s her business either way, but still…

      As for her hiding, she’s sorta not seen that much to begin with, so…😏

    • ORIGINAL T.C. says:

      Your long hospital stays are more the exception than the rule. There is such a thing as standard of care all over the US. And standard of care for Melania’s scheduled vague kidney operation is 1 night and longer *if* there is an infection or the surgery more extensive than anticipated. But she reported the length of stay before the surgery. Even if you have a lot of money Hospitals don’t keep you long because your chance of picking up an infection increases everyday you are there. Additionally they have interviewed many doctors on TV who also agree that it’s not standard of care to stay for the week.

      • Lizabeth says:

        I don’t know if it’s fishy or not. But no one ever said she’d be there for an entire week. The announcement said “the rest of the week” which could mean discharge tomorrow. Articles I’ve seen say she might be staying for lung tests as the kind of tumor it is *presumed* to be can have an effect there also. Finally, going home to the White House is hardly like returning to a royal palace. The family quarters aren’t that luxurious nor are they likely set up for in-house medical support. Regardless, she is entitled to her privacy.

      • ORIGINAL T.C. says:

        @Lisbeth

        To check for a tumor in the lung only requires a CT or MRI. Lung function tests are for people with breathing problems like COPD, cystic fibrosis, bronchitis, pneumonia. These people in the WH have lied about every single thing they tell us including Melania (who lied about her education, immigration story, etc). Especially heath related stuff which they seem to make up completely or have their doctors lie for them.

        Thing is she didn’t even have to announce it, no one checks for her including the press. She wasn’t expected at the Embassy opening in Israel, nor was she scheduled for a speech. So why mention it and have your statement analyzed? But it was a 4 hour story and the press won’t push her for an answer. Just like they didn’t follow up on her BS immigration story.

      • Lizabeth says:

        Thanks Original TC. I was aware of how lung tumors are screened for. My point in mentioning it was simply that dr’s consulted by networks like CNN have mentioned that issue as a reason for a longer hospitalization (along with the nausea & vomiting that some people have after the named kidney procedure–don’t want to be puking inside a closed MRI tube!) I also don’t remember–maybe you know— if lung imaging requires the use of contrast. If so, there may be a need to wait a bit of time after many kidney procedures/stressors. There also could be oddities about her kidneys. Or a desire to wait for full pathology results before discharge. Or 1000 other details docs working on any 1st Lady would be cautious about. What puzzles me most though is the degree of outrage some folks seem to have about the possibility of not being told the truth & the whole truth about an elected official’s WIFE’S medical situation. Especially when you consider what we haven’t known about past PRESIDENTS health until well after the fact (FDR, JFK, for example)

    • Anname says:

      I had laparoscopic gall bladder removal surgery in 2014 and it was outpatient – had it done in the morning and was home by late afternoon. With sleep and pain relievers, I was fine and happy to be home. Before they could use laparoscopy, it used to be a week long hospital stay.

    • Bumble says:

      Andrea you need to be more careful! Joking, but glad you are ok. What happened with your jumps? Refusal? How did you fall? Fellow rider wants to know..

    • Bumble says:

      Andrea you need to be more careful! Joking, but glad you are ok. What happened with your jumps? Refusal? How did you fall? Fellow rider wants to know..

  16. Booie says:

    Are we sure she’s not just suffering from pain in the a**? If I were here I’d rather check into a hospital too than have to go back to dealing with other things

  17. Shambles says:

    The suicide assumptions make me feel gross, but I guess I’m gross too. Has no one considered that this disgusting man is so backed into a corner that he hurt her?

    • Anname says:

      I don’t buy the suicide ideas either, if only because she seems very protective of Baron and wouldn’t leave him alone with only his horrible father.

  18. Sandy says:

    It’s her way of staying away from her husband as long as possible 😂

  19. nikzilla says:

    Cosmetic Surgery a.k.a Kidney surgery….like we are all that dumb.

  20. jferber says:

    Yes, her jaw looks rounder, I just noticed. Maybe she’s getting heavy-duty face work to look as young as her husband (wink, wink). Or maybe she’s just sick enough of him that she’d willingly check into a hospital to get a short respite from him. Then there’s always the nervous breakdown. So many possibilities (but not kidney trouble).

  21. Veronica S. says:

    Definitely a cover up, but yeah. I do think her HIPAA rights should be respected because of the domino effect it can create via precedent for the rest of us.

  22. vesper says:

    I think this is PR speak for “Melania has officially left the building”, meaning she’s moved out. Can’t blame her.

  23. Katy says:

    I spent two weeks in the hospital due to a kidney infection. If she had surgery, I can see a week hospital stay as reasonable. There’s a high possibility of sepsis with kidney ailments. Especially when surgery is involved because it increases the risk of infection. Why would this be a cover story?

  24. Jayna says:

    I bought her story. but I felt this was personal and private anyway and none of my business. So I don’t care whether it’s completely true or not.

  25. Danielle says:

    The Trump administration lies so often it’s hard to buy anything they say.

  26. Zara says:

    Definitely having a cosmetic touch up of some sort! Maybe changing her breast implants? Don’t they need replacing every 10 years??

  27. MerrymerrymonthofMay says:

    Maybe Dr Ben Carson did the surgery and he botched it up

  28. Em says:

    Wasn’t one of the reasons the old White House Doctor got canned was that he leaked information of the first ladies health to VP Pence? Interesting, I wonder if there was more to the health problem, perhaps not , no one here is her doctor so no one here has a clue why she might be staying a week. I don’t recall any mention of it being key-hole surgery so a stay of 5 days is quite common after deep surgery to make sure no infection or complications develop.

  29. Mi'smom says:

    Maybe she left him and they are trying to cover it up and are working on getting her to come back. Has anyone outside of WH verified that she is at Walter Reed?

  30. DJ Trump the 3rd says:

    the American people don’t pat for their food jackass

  31. Jag says:

    My mother started getting yearly mammograms at age 40. At age 42, no more than a few months after her third one, my father found a lump. It was cancerous. As a matter of fact, she had stage 4 metastatic breast cancer because the cancer had spread throughout her body and the mammogram missed it every year. As soon as the test results from the lump came back, she had a radical mastectomy and seven lymph nodes removed – and she was given a less than 2% chance of living. Mammograms use radiation to get their images, and radiation can cause cancer.

    MRI and full ultrasound are what I ask for. MRI is what I want, but full ultrasound is accurate and what I have if the doctor refuses to MRI.

    As for Melania, we’ll see how much her appearance has changed I suppose. I don’t believe it was for her kidneys, either.