We’re allowed to say O.J. Simpson is a wife beating murdering piece of shit now – at least the civil court found him guilty. I hate, hate the way he has been living in comfort while the families of his victims fought for a decade to get their $33.5mil settlement out of O.J., but it seems he might have been a little hard up for cash – and nothing makes me smirk more than the idea of him being hard up for cash!

A Santa Monica judge ordered the former football star to turn over his gold Rolex Submariner watch — estimated to be worth $12,000 to $22,000 — to the family.

But the Hall of Fame running back hit them with a fake — literally — when it was discovered that the luxury timepiece was a knockoff made in China, worth about $125.

“It was made by the finest craftsmen in China,” said David Cook, the Goldman family attorney who plans to return the watch to Simpson. “It’s a people’s Rolex.”

Los Angeles Times

Hey O.J., my dad is a postal worker and still has a real Rolex, you’re telling me you can’t afford one?

I’m also pretty happy that the man who allegedly wrote the ‘If I Did It’ book isn’t going to profit from it, but the families of his victims are. The victory would only be sweeter if I thought O.J. had written any of it himself. The only bit he probably contributed was the ‘I didn’t do it’ part.

O.J.’s hearing for his involvement in an armed robbery and kidnapping has been set for November 8th. Now the memorabilia he was trying so hard to get his hands on is being held as evidence. You know what I have to say about that? Hahahahahahaha!