Lest you think Kim Kardashian is anything but classiness on a stick, she wants you to know that she’s not a wild drunken party girl like all the other celebutards out there. No, Kim is brains, Kim is compassion, and Kim is… you’re not even listening to me, are you? You’re thinking about her ass! Jerk. Kim and her butt are is on the cover of the December issues of Playboy, in a joint promotion between said butt and her new E! television show “Keeping up with the Kardashians.” Kim says she’s not nude in the magazine, but that you will see her whole butt… which entails about as much skin as most playmates show in a nude shoot. Did I make enough big butt jokes here? Are you hearing Sir-Mix-a-Lot in your head yet?

Us: How revealing is your Playboy shoot?
Kim Kardashian: It is not as revealing as some people might want. I keep it classy and covered up. I do bare my whole butt. And a little bit of my chest. But that’s it. It was something that I was really nervous about doing at first and this is the first time I am talking about it. I consulted the whole family and I decided this is the way I would have wanted it to come out.

Us: What’s it like having cameras around you 24-7 while filming your reality show?
KK: I think we are used to it now. I am really excited because I feel like there are so many misconceptions of what us Hollywood girls are really like. We are so different from what people would think and I think everyone is going to be shocked.

Us: What are some of the misconceptions?
KK: Everyone thinks that I am this wild party girl and that I get drunk and dance on tables, but I don’t even drink alcohol. We [she and sisters Khloe and Kourtney] own businesses and we work every single day and we have 10 kids in the family and we did not grow up with nannies.

Us: Are you dating [NFL running back] Reggie Bush?
KK: We’re really close friends. He’s such an amazing guy! But between me being busy with the new show, and his being in the middle of the football season, it’s not like I have time to dedicate myself to a relationship right now anyway.

Us: Why don’t you and Paris Hilton hang out anymore?
KK: I love Paris. We grew up together, but friends drift apart and we just don’t hang out like we used to. Maybe someday we will again.

Us: You briefly dated Nick Lachey in 2006. Have you seen him since he met Vanessa Minnillo?
KK: I ran into him once earlier this year at a club. He’s always a gentleman. We only went on a few dates a long time ago. It’s not like we have to be uncomfortable.

[From Us Magazine]

Something tells me that Kim Kardashian does more than enough in the span of a few dates that might make it uncomfortable to run into an ex. But I’m projecting here. I’m sure her show will be an absolute “must catch.” I mean no one does quality reality programming quite like E! I’m guessing it’ll be a lot of following her around (from behind, of course) while she wears a variety of velour and terrycloth tracksuits. Sometimes Kim will hold a purse-sized dog, sometimes a glittery cell phone, and often wear overly-large sunglasses. We will see her lunch with some other nearly unknowns, and once in a while make a reference to her dear father, the deceased OJ Simpson lawyer Robert Kardashian, who’s Kim’s only relation who deserves some respect (not for OJ, but he was a talented lawyer). Then Kim will drop something, bend over, and the camera will get back to business.