Madonna and her chipmunk cheeks made an appearance on Letterman yesterday, and I found her moderately likable and not full of sh*t for once. Madonna often seems self-righteous and haughty, but she was in her element with Dave and came across as comfortable, funny and dare-I-say kind of cute. She quipped that her famous f-bomb laden appearance on The Late Show in 1996 (link leads to video) was due to the joint she smoked before the show. She even played along with a couple of gags, including being carried into the studio by a bunch of hockey players and taking a bite of cheeseless pizza, which she seemed to regard as some kind of alien substance that she would endure for the sake of the cameras.
As for those rumors that Madonna is set to marry her 28 years-younger boyfriend, she deadpanned that she’d “rather get run over by a train than marry again.” It wasn’t all witticisms from Madonna. She also sniped that it was hard being a single parent because “There’s no job sharing… You can’t say, ‘Hey can you give the kids a bath?’” Doesn’t Madonna have a least two nannies? Why is she adopting if even the occasional night mommy duties are too much for her? She could avoid having to give her children baths if she would pay overtime, though. She’s far from a typical divorced mother.
Madonna may be the most eligible single woman in the world but she will never say her “I do’s” with Brazilian toy boy, Jesus Luz. “I think I”d rather get run over by a train,” she declared on the Late Show with David Letterman, Sept. 30.
Looking chic and sophisticated, Madonna, 51, (sounding American again, after years of speaking with an affected English accent) joked that she’d been living in London with her ex-husband Guy Ritchie, “during the Bush years, it was a good time to be out of America.”
Although she admitted, “That said I do miss things about being married. Being a single parent means you’re in charge of everything.
“You can’t say, ‘Hey can you give the kids a bath?’ There’s no job sharing.”
But will the singer, who’s been dating model Jesus, 22, for nine months, fall in love again? “I’ve lost perspective,” she replied, “I don’t know.”
When David, 62, addressed her as “Madge” the Material Girl— who has 200 million album sales under her belt — replied. “You know that’s one of the reasons I left England, so I don’t have to hear the word Madge again.
“People say it means two different things. Some say it is a colloquialism for a boring middle-aged housewife – others say it is short for majesty.”
There’s no way you could describe this mother-of-four (to Lourdes, 12, Rocco, 9, David, 3, and four-year old Mercy who she adopted from Malawi this year) as a boring or middle-aged.
Promoting her new greatest hits collection, “Celebration”, released this week. The diva mentioned her life changes since she last appeared on the show in 2007. “Last time I was on I had three kids and I was married and you had one kid and weren’t married,’ she joked to David, who wed his long-term love Regina Lasko in March.
The father-of-one asked his guest, “If you had to be one thing in your life, in this world would you just want to be a parent?’
Madonna replied: ‘No, yikes. I mean it’s a challenging job to be a parent.”
“It’s the most important job isn’t it?’ responded Dave.
“Yes – that’s the politically correct answer,” answered the singer, who’s just ended her world Sticky and Sweet tour, “It’s a great job. I wouldn’t change my job as a parent for anything but its also extremely challenging. Teenagers right?”
Madonna was most affronted, not by a question about A-Rod, but talk of her diet. “We heard a rumor that you haven’t had New York pizza by the slice,” David queried, “what do you like on your pie?”
“That’s a very personal question,” she laughed, before Dave marched her next door to Angelo’s Italian restaurant for her first visit to a NYC pizzeria, where Madonna put her macrobiotic regime aside to munch on a cheese-free slice with black olives and toast the crowd with a martini.
[From OK! Magazine]
PopEater also has a new interview with Madonna, set to be published in Billboard, in which she reveals that her soon-to-be 13 year-old daughter, Lourdes, may want to be an actress. Madonna said that’s fine with her “as long as she finishes school, and takes it seriously.” As for whether she’ll have more kids, Madonna says “I have my hands full right now… But we never say never.” Madonna also mentions that she plans to direct again, despite the fact that her directorial debut was largely panned. As Jaybird mentioned last year, it’s not like Madonna will ever admit she’s not good at something.
Madonna definitely seems much happier and less smug than usual. From her heartfelt but self-focused “me me me” speech honoring Michael Jackson at the VMAs to this semi-normal appearance on Letterman, she seems like she’s changed. I bet it has something to do with that young stud she’s been parading around. Now that we know that she has no intentions of marrying him, we can assume she’s in it for the sex – not that anyone ever assumed otherwise.
Madonna is shown outside the Late Show yesterday. Credit: WENN.com and Diane Cohen/Fame Pictures