'09
It seems fitting that to celebrate the birth of the baby Jesus, we would find ourselves reviewing ye olde uncool Bermuda Triangle. In Touch Weekly chose Angelina Jolie’s fabric bump to push their “Revenge Pregnancy” cover story, while Star Magazine and Us Weekly have other versions of what’s going on in Triangleville. Uncool Town? Brangiston County? Whatever. Since we are without the print copies of these tabloids this week (re: I was too cheap to buy them), we’ll have to make due with Jezebel’s summations:
In Touch Weekly - For the 8,000th time this year, Angelina got pregnant to trap Brad in their loveless union. She has a “telltale bump” [of fabric] and sources say she’s three months pregnant. This is putting a damper on Brad’s plans to leave Angie for Jennifer Aniston. They’ve been hooking up secretly, yet the mag still figured out the exact time and location of their last rendezvous: December 9 at 3:30pm on a secluded trail off of Western Canyon Road in Beverly Hills. Jen told a friend it was “like their relationship had never ended,” but someone from In Touch writes: “She wouldn’t reveal whether she and Brad had a romantic encounter,” which is apparently how the mag is referring to sex now. Meanwhile, Angie “will do anything to keep Brad around — and that includes planning a huge celebration for Zahara’s 5th birthday on January 8, knowing that he would have to attend.” Why else would a mother plan a birthday party for her 5-year-old daughter?
Us Weekly - Angelina Jolie gave Jennifer Aniston a break this week and agreed to be the one who’s “so lonely.” Angie’s sad because she has no mommy friends, but for some reason the source phrased that as “Angelina is hungry for normal moms to be around,” which makes it sound like she’s a mom-brain craving zombie.
Star Magazine – Jennifer Aniston is still trying to adopt a Mexican baby with Brad Pitt’s’ help, but Star writes, “in the meantime, she’s sowing her wild oats all over Hollywood.” The mag claims she’s dating Sam Rockwell, Josh Groban, and Josh Hopkins of Cougar Town, who Courteney Cox brought to Jen’s holiday party. A source says they exchanged numbers so later “Jen picked up the phone and asked Josh to come to her chili cook-off party.”
[From Jezebel]
Er… Josh Groban? I really thought he had come out of the closet? Maybe not. Sam Rockwell’s a hottie, though. He had a long relationship with Sarita Choudhury, so I’ve always kept him in mind for “a cool dude who digs Indian girls like me.”
Anyway, there are a few other pieces of Brangelina news. On Tuesday, Brad and Angelina made a very special outing – with their four oldest children! Unfortunately, we don’t have access to those cute photos, but LaineyGossip does. Very cute… Shiloh is wearing a skull-and-crossbones knit cap, and Empress Zahara is wearing a “bitch please” look as she stares down the cameras.
There was also this weird interview floating around on Wednesday – I’m almost positive it’s total crap, but tons of sites are picking it up, and it just seems weird. First, it’s from a German magazine called Das Neue. Why would Angelina give an interview to a German magazine at all, much less when she’s not promoting anything…? Then, there’s the weird tone of the “interview”. It just seems… off.
Angelina Jolie has said that fidelity is not essential for a relationship to work.
The Hollywood actress – who raises six children with her long-term partner Brad Pitt – believes open romances can work just as well as monogamous relationships, if both partners agree to it.
She told Das Neue magazine: “I doubt that fidelity is absolutely essential for a relationship. It’s worse to leave your partner and talk badly about him afterwards.”
“Neither Brad nor I have ever claimed that living together means to be chained together. We make sure that we never restrict each other.”
However, she added that the couple have a fiery relationship at times.
She said: “The sparks fly at home if the nice Brad fails to see that he’s wrong and reacts in a defiant way. Then I can get so angry that I tear his shirt.”
[From The Telegraph]
Er… “the sparks fly at home if the nice Brad fails to see that he’s wrong and reacts in a defiant way.” Yes, the nice Angelina speaks and reacts this way when a magazine fails to see that they are full of defiant crap. What I really think happened was that they used some old quotes of Angelina’s, changed a few words here and there, translated it into German, and translated it back into English. It’s like the celebrity gossip version of that game “Telephone”.
In Touch Weekly cover courtesy of Cover Awards.
Written by Kaiser
Posted in Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston, Pregnant
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48 Responses to “Angelina Jolie’s “revenge pregnancy” & strange, fake interview”
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Finally someone with a brain who can see this is a totally made up story. Maybe if I cross my fingers and wish upon a star they will leave this woman and her family the hell alone in 2010. She is not promoting anything at the moment. Nor is Brad, and the tab media is like a dog with a bone. I can’t believe that after almost 5 years together the press can’t find someone else to focus on.. I was looking at some of the archives threads, and OH boy the same kind of stories time after time.. and most if not all are proven lies. So I as a fan have to be thankful that she is really a strong woman. Don’t know of many people who could hold up after having this crap thrown at them year after year.
Makes me like her even more.
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Definitely. Es ist ein beschissener Artikel!!! (full of shit basically innit?)
Love that: “…they used some old quotes of Angelina’s, changed a few words here and there, translated it into German, and translated it back into English.”
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*First*
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I agree the story is BS. I have to crack up every time the slightest little piece of fabric is out of place, it’s instantly a baby bump.
Where are these “old quotes” from though? I’d be much more inclined to agree with that if someone knew where they were lifted from.
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Lisa, I really believe Angelina when she says she never reads this crap!! She said in one interview that she doesn’t know what the ragmags are saying unless an interviewer mentions something during a (real) interview. I really don’t think all this crap bothers her.
Besides, it’s always the same story time and again. Only the truly ignorant believe any of this. I mean, how many times can she be “pregnant”? How long will these fools say that Brad and Jen are seeing each other when there is no photo to back it up? How many times can Brad “walk out” before they give up that storyline? It’s just all so ridiculous now that most people are laughing . . . until an obviously fake interview is released and the sh!t starts all over again!!
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A revenge pregnancy? If only it were that easy for everyone. He steps out of line and she wills herself to get knocked up, and poof: done.
lisa using the word finally is a bit of an exaggeration, most posters here agree repeatedly that these tab stories are full of bs. The tabloids do themselves a disservice by going all out on the shit-o-meter, that it’s impossible to believe any of it.
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oh DD my comment about finally was for Kaiser. It is just funny how some sites will post that stupid story and not even tap into their brain matter and say how dumb it is or sounds. I said finally because at least Kaiser said it sounded fake.
But yes I agree. I mean How many times have they had Brad walks out, or Brad leaves. Hardly ever that Angie leaves.. but then that would not make the haters happy. Brad has to be the one leaving. Just sad and pathetic that some fools want 6 young children to be in a broken home.
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All are fake stories about Angie.
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Josh Groban dated January Jones for years and earlier this year, dated that toxic freak Katy Perry. I think he briefly (very) was also with Zooey Deschanel.
Sorry, still in the closet.
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Bradley looks dopier as the days and years go by.
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I don’t understand IT. For years they’ve been saying Brad and Jennifer are back together. So why hasn’t he left Angelina? Staying for the kids doesn’t make sense since he would stop having kids with Anglina long ago. Jennifer said she barely talks to Brad so why are the tabs saying they’re best friends?
It’s obvious the German interview is fake. It’s obvious when a lot of interviews are fake or just a bunch of old quotes. You would think the big tip-off would be that it’s coming from a tabloid or an unrecognizable magazine. Most A-list celebrities don’t do any interviews unless they are promoting something which Angelina isn’t. Besides the tone and comments doesn’t sound like things she would say.
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The funny thing is, that Jennifer Aniston wouldn’t accept Brad back in a 1000 years – if she has a “bad, lonely and sad” image now, just imagine if she welcomes Brad back. How could she! She has no respect! bla bla
Not that I believe she’s “waiting” for him or anything.
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The freaks on Female First have already put their own spin on the photos of Brad, Angie and the kids in NYC. Are you ready for this? First they said Brad and Shiloh were photoshopped into the pictures because Angie was there alone with the adopted kids. Then when they realized the photos were genuine, they said Brad had only stopped by the restaurant to say goodbye to Angie and the adopted kids and collect Shiloh. According to these wackos, Brad was taking Shiloh to Missouri where the senior Pitts were looking after the twins, and then Brad, Shiloh, the twins and the senior Pitts are all going to California to spend Christmas with Jennifer (didn’t IT say Bill and Jane Pitt had accepted her invitation to Christmas dinner?) and after Christmas, Bill and Jane will return to Missouri and Brad, Shiloh and the twins will remain with Jennifer and they will all live together happily ever after.
IT and their wacko readers must live in some kind of parallel universe completely divorced from reality.
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“intouch” is way out there… BS BS BS
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Well, IT has to throw their readers a bone after they got their hopes up for nothing over Ian Halperin’s book. You know, the one they said was going to destroy Angie and make Brad run back to Jennifer the minute the book hit the shelves? The book sank like a stone, nobody is buying it, and poor Jennifer is still Bradless. The freaks on FF are blaming Brad and Angie for sabotaging the book as one more step toward their infernal quest for world domination.
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Wouldn’t be surprised if they have “animated” fights (so?), but the big giveaway that this supposed interview is a big ol’ fake is they make it sound like English is AJ’S SECOND lanuguage…
“…the nice Brad?”
::snort::
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How could it be a revenge pregnancy if the baby-daddy isn’t Billy Bob?
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Let’s summarize all the tabloid stories about this love triangle in a few phrases, shall we?
“OMFG – Angelina Jolie is a Satanic home wrecker! Virginal Jennifer Aniston is her victim, but she’s also a total mess because she can’t keep a man! Angelina put a gun to Brad Pitt’s temple so that he wouldn’t be able to control his penis! She bewitched him with her demonic temptress powers! She’s a lesbian with tattoos! OMG, she is SO INDECENT and she’s prettier than you, so pile on the hatred!”
OK, tabloid editors, we more than know all that *rolls eyes*.
Now, CAN’T YOU F*CKING FIND ANY WORTHIER THING TO TALK ABOUT?!?!!!
This is getting beyond old. Angelina Jolie is about as genuine as a plastic diamond – that’s more than evident. I doubt that Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt are any better, and the three of them have exploited this beyond anything tolerable. Move on already and stop beating a dead horse.
Also, if they want to appear in the media, they should try to find better ways to do so… Even if they include parading around with your adopted promotional tools, I mean, children, and exploiting poor people in Third World countries, I mean, comforting them in front of thousands of reporters because you’re “a saint”.
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I don’t get the parading the adopted kids around for attention comment, we’ve only seen them eight times all year. Parading a child around on a daily basis is for attention. Some pictures of the JP children aren’t even new ones. Here I was thinking I’d love to see the children more, gee what was I thinking! I just don’t get the too much comment, we barely see these children. Love Brad and Angelina, two people trying to make the world a better place.
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“This is getting beyond old. Angelina Jolie is about as genuine as a plastic diamond – that’s more than evident.”
Hmmm FYI Angelina is the most honest person in HW judging with the way she answered her interview it’s no hold barred. And when did Angelina ever exploited a third world country?? Only in your delusional hate filled brain.
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she’s not preggers
she has a bazillion projects comeing up
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heh, you actually had me chuckling there for a minute…
But I have to say that anyone who’s spent more than a few days taking care of a child (let alone 6) knows that there are far easier ways to get publicity than to use “adopted promotional tools” (a very disgusting way to refer to children, in my opinion).
And anyone who’s done more than the occasional trip to the food kitchens (let alone how many years now of UN work?) knows that there are far less painful and heartbreaking ways of “exploiting poor people” for publicity.
This seems kind of out of line to me. Shrug.
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Cheyenne:
Keep the conspiracy theories coming! I have relatives to entertain.
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AJ IS looking a little *wide* in the white atrocity she’s wearing. Wonder who the baby daddy is if Brad’s in his dawg hawse doing drugs and calling Jen for warm fuzzies?
Jen sounds busy. The Josh Grobin thing might just be her hiring him to provide Christmas Chili Cookoff music or to set him up with some of her non-androgynous friends who might LIKE him winkwink nudgenudge. Besides, I thought it was chic to help those who bat for the other team appear straight Renee/Bradley.
Happy Festivus Everybody!!!
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I believe that they FIGHT all the time. The general public doesn’t buy their PR anymore. Who Cares. The book was very good by Halperin.
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@ Munkey: if you really want some giggles, check out the female first web site http://www.femalefirst.co.uk or Ian Halperin’s website (google the address). Nothing is too far out for those insane freaks to accuse her of doing. She’s been accused of everything on those web sites from plotting world domination to selling Asian children as sex slaves. You get the idea. Just bring a bucket to heave into, because some of the posts may totally gross you out.
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Haters will believe whatever they want about Brad and Angie.
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Brad is wearing/growing that horrible goatee thing for a film.
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Shut up all jealous, bitter bich chinifer mafaceton fan all of you going to hell for your stink mouth big lied and created fake stories about Angie. Hey, look closer at you Jen long horse chin chin who so ugly, plastic, old maid .Brad won’t get back to her. Stop dreamming. move on.
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IF THEY ALWAYS FIGHTING. THEY CAN’T MAKE BABIES.STOP GOSSIP. CARE YOUR OWN.
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I don’t understand why the people here so stuppid to believed what Ian Halperin wrote. He was jailed one time because created a big lied story about someone Now he do it again. But still have some dumbass read and trust him. They are idiots.
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What’s the deal with this one illiterate person ranting at the tag end? Not me, the other one.
Hey weirdness, one nickname per freak, and also you would do better to read and comprehend the article first, so that you can find the humour in it and the comments. Just a time saver.
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@CB Rawks: LOL “one nickname per freak” I thought these things were moderated for freak protection? Somebody needs anti-Aniston chill pills.
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What a crock.
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Why on Gods green earth did they photoshop Angelinas picture? She’s so gorgeous and doesn’t need any.
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You know, I do believe that Angelina has no mommy friends…apparently, she has NO female friends that she doesn’t sleep with. I do believe she’s a master manipulator and most likely mentally unstable, and I feel that way NOT because I am a Jennifer Aniston fan (I could care less) but because of Angelina’s less-than-stellar history. Yes, people can change, but I don’t think she has or will. I don’t care what she’s doing, who she’s doing it with, and where it’s being done…I just wish that all of this stupid “love triangle” BS would go away. It’s really hard to believe that any marriage or relationship in Hollywood is real with all of the BS that goes on there. What a miserable, pathetic way to live a life.
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So wait, I love how they use a headline (ie “the revenge baby”) only to never explain what the hell they’re talking about in the actual article. God I hate tabs.
And yeah, that german interview is totally fake. The sentence doesn’t even make sense, and i highly doubt those are things Angelina would ever admit to even if they did happen. She never talks like that to tabs.
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I thought she was best buds with Marianne Pearl?
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Nobody said you had to be stupid to read Halperin’s book. But you have to be pretty damn stupid to believe all the bullshit he wrote in it.
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Well… upon reading the article and it’s comments, the only thing I’ve come to realize for certain is that “coop”, “Jen”, “COX” and “Boys” are all the same person. A person in need of a few more English classes. I don’t think Angie’s pregnant. She’s had a sort of bump on her belly ever since giving birth to twins. And honestly, who wouldn’t? Look back at the pictures of the Golden Globes last year. She sparked rumors then, too. The cream dress doesn’t flatter her midsection at all. Back then or now.
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P.S.–LOL @Cheyenne! You actually HAVE said a few times that anybody who read Halperin’s book is stupid! E.I., the ________ (insert derogatory names or slurs here, such as: Jen-Hens, boo-hoo sisterhood, idiots, etc.) are the only ones dumb enough to run out and buy that book! Oh if I had a nickel for everytime you insult people who have differing opinions than you, or for every time you try to backtrack…well you know how the saying goes. Thanks for the laugh anyway! Peace out and Merry Christmas to everybody!
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@Bek – you are right! Coop, Jen, Cox and Boys are the same person. Banned for multiple nicks.
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@ Bek: I didn’t say anybody was stupid for reading the book. Buying it is another matter altogether. I admit the book may have some uses: 1) toilet paper, 2) wrapping the wet garbage, 3) starting a fire in the fireplace, 4) placing muddy boots on it so the floor doesn’t get wet…
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Can’t believe that there are people who actually believe that Angelina is going to give a quote to some obscure magazine.. which is a tabloid magazine to boot.. that this obscure magazine has broken this “earth shattering story”. GMAFB
Yeah.. MAN people will believe anything. But more so if it is about this particular couple. Really sick.. I guess most of them will not be happy until they break up.. But then what? What will the haters and rag mags obsess over then. Well I think Brad/Angie must have a very strong relationship. They have so much crap thrown at them. But I don’t think they give a shit about what the outside world thinks. Well good for them.
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STOP PERPETUATING THIS STUPID “TRANGLE” BS ALREADY BY NOT REPORTING ON IT IN THE FIRST PLACE!
Jesus, it’s been like five years since whathisname and whatsherface split, who friggin CARES?
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I read the fidelity quotation from The Huntington Post and International Herald Tribune.
I think everyone needs to chill on this site. One can easily know there are fans out there for Ms Jolie. But there is no need to attack Brad’s ex, or to use bad language to insult anyone who decides to believe in other news sources than Kaiser’s.
Peace. Happy New Year.
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A few weeks ago, the police showed up at Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, warned by neighbors… Shouts echoed through the house of actors… Angie was furious at the point to leave some objects through the windows…
Angelina Jolie interviewed by the magazine Das Neue, said :
“I doubt that fidelity is absolutely essential in a relationship. Leaving her husband and speak ill of him after it’s worse” and “The magic disappears when the nice Brad fails to understand that it is wrong and he responds provocatively. When he did that, I can put so angry that I tore his T-shirt. ”
So, we resume, for Angelina Jolie
* speak ill of his companion, it is not right but me Angelina Jolie, I can do it and it’s good
* become violent again her companion, it’s normal
* afford an adventure from time to time, it’s cool
A good atmosphere among parents over to Hollywood, intending to adopt again ???
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Hope that Jolie/Pitt would sue the Das Neue magazine regarding the fake interview. Tabloids have made up stories about them for years but making up “interview” where they claimed the words came from her while it did not really cross the line. They should put their foot down and go after this German tabloid with a lawsuit, instead of ignoring them like they always did.
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