Tracy Morgan sure isn’t doing himself any favors lately. The “30 Rock” star has had two DUIs since 2005. His wife of 22 years recently filed for divorce, citing Tracy’s alcoholism. Despite several public claims that he’s completely stopped drinking, Morgan appeared on the “Late Show” on Thursday, and he seemed to have partaken of some substance or other. Letterman started off the interview by asking about Morgan’s recent DUI and how that all went. Tracy cracked a few jokes, and then told a story of having a sake bomb at Benihana’s recently. And just to clarify – though I probably don’t need to – a sake bomb consists of one shot sake rice wine and one glass of beer, which the drinker drinks as quickly as possible. After mentioning this, Dave asks Morgan, “So you’re abstaining, completely?” to which he replies “Huh?” Then there’s a pause and he goes on to talk about how he’s quit drinking completely, at the request of his eldest son.

Later in the interview, Dave asks Jordan how he’s been keeping himself busy during the Writer’s Guild strike. His response was golden.

“I’m just doin’ karate and getting females pregnant…at the same time.”

[From the Late Show]

Culture Bully gives a rundown of the interview’s other highlights.

In between DL asking Tracy about his ankle bracelet and his sobriety Tracy dropped comedy gold on the nation. It’s moments like these that make me wonder if I should start watching TV again.

“It’s in the Smithsonian next to Michael Jackson’s glove, and his nose.” [about his SCRAM bracelet]

“Now if I go near alcohol I turn into a Gremelin.”

“Tie Tony up the night before the game and make his legs like spaghetti.”

“I call him by his government, Phillip.”

“I found the edge a while ago and jumped off, I’m crazier than a box of rocks.”

[From Culture Bully]

Tracy Morgan strikes me as one of those people that should really be kept busy. Free time could be exceptionally dangerous for him. The Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers should seriously consider negotiating better with the Writers’ Guild to end the strike, if for no other reason than making sure Tracy Morgan goes back to work as soon as possible. Before he really does get females pregnant.

Picture note by Jaybird: Tracy Morgan leaving Letterman’s show. Images thanks to