Jennifer Aniston is stealing my Gerard Butler game

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So in between endless pregnancy announcements today (like Amy Poehler’s and Kevin Costner’s and those people from It’s Always Sunny and Winne Cooper’s), I’ve been wondering about my guy Gerard Butler. I’ve been wondering if he and Jennifer Aniston are really hot for each other or if they’re just playing like they’re hot for each other. I’ve been wondering what he looks like naked. I’ve been wondering how many girls he’s banged since he got to New York. I’ve also been watching his Good Morning America interview, and it’s hilarious and interesting and weird. He’s talking about building schools in Haiti, but with his brogue, “schools” sounds like “screws”. Which is not what he’s doing, for the record. Oh, and FYI: Aniston is stealing my game. She’s befriending Gerard’s mom. That was my way in, bitch!

Oh, I would give anything to know what (who) he was doing all night, causing him to get no sleep. Partying with hookers much?

Anyway, in further “Aniston-is-stealing-my-game” news, she’s actually cooking and baking for him. Seriously, that was my move too, Aniston! Stop mind-f-cking me!!! Aniston told People Magazine, “I love to cook.” And Butler confirmed: “Mexican…She has a big thing with Mexico and Mexican food. And I had a great night of Mexican food and a whole bunch of people … over at her house, she had a big to-do, and she had a lot of friends over and it was delicious. She makes a good cupcake. And I’m good at eating them.” You bastard! You promised you would only eat my cupcakes!

So are they together? Perhaps even asking that question is an admission that this game has worked yet again. Or perhaps they’re just two people who get along, affectionately and publicly. Meh. Gerard summed up his feelings on the dating-Aniston rumors by telling The Sun: “I went for her birthday to Mexico. We’re just friends. We have a natural chemistry – you can see it in our magazine shoot and the film. We have a great time together. But here’s the thing – while they’re accusing me of being with Jennifer, I’ve probably been off somewhere else doing damage with someone else.” With me? I’ll never tell. Actually, I would probably do a three-part series (at least) for this site if I ever got the chance to meet (much less nail) Gerry.

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Gerard at the ‘Bounty Hunter’ premiere on March 16, 2010. Credit: Pacific Coast News.

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35 Responses to “Jennifer Aniston is stealing my Gerard Butler game”

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  1. Ursaline says:

    Yeah…the yumminess is coming out in this one.

  2. lolo says:

    I loved him in P.S. I love you. He made me cry so hard!

  3. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    Ugh, I don’t see how you find him attractive. You can see this in any city and they are all fugly as hell in the morning with that snort and cough and fart routine before they go to your bathroom and pee, whilst leaving the sit up on their way out. I can totally see him with red eyes in the back of a funky strip club with a size 24 wiggling on his lap. How can any woman find this hot?

  4. Shayna says:

    Agree… Food was my #1 tactic… perhaps some not so subtle flattery regarding the fact that the scruff beard-esque facial hair he’s currently sporting actually makes him hotter… instead of making him look like a lumberjack as it does most men?

  5. sarah says:

    shechive’s eye candy for the day is Mr. Butler. lol. you should check it out.

  6. moo says:

    I am so glad he didn’t do that fugly duck face!!! He actually looks sexy here… (except for the scratchy looking neck hair….) yeek!

  7. Scout says:

    They sure to cling to each other in all these poses I see like they are alot more than friends! My two cents on his looks, I find him mildy attractive…nothing to get too excited over!

  8. Ursaline says:

    Love Angelina, it sounds like you’re projecting something here. Many of us have had plenty of fond memories with scruffy-faced morning men. 🙂

  9. Melanie says:

    Oy Vey, If she really does fall for him (I doubt it) then she is going to taste the burn yet again. Come on Jen, pick a nice guy! I am thinking they are just friends. (I hope it).

  10. bellaluna says:

    I think they are just friends who have chemistry, like he said. Nothing wrong with that. They may also be friends with benefits. Nothing wrong with that, either. Except, of course, that he’s mine. He just doesn’t know it yet.

  11. ThunderC*nt says:

    He’s the type of chav you see drunk in the pubs in Great Britian every day. Same type while Sean Penn and Mel Gibson are that other type. Now those German or Dutch guys, that’s what I want. Butler looks like he comes from a long line of lower class drunks.

  12. noonoo says:

    Sadly I think she’s just trying to make Mayer aware of what he’s missed out on…

  13. cee says:

    I do not see the attraction. But maybe Aniston needs a man to get her from stalking Brad and Angie.

  14. Melanie says:

    @ cee, Your momma goes to college.

  15. kandy says:

    LOL@cee. I think this so-called relationship will be over after the film is released. Jen’s using interest in her private life to sell mediocre films. I mean why would she invite Billy Bush/Access Hollywood and People magazine to document her b-day party in Cabo, and talk about Gerry? It’s obvious she wants people to think they’re an item. Then, she complains about all the tabloid “soap opera.” Hypocrite.

  16. beaver says:

    Jen is classy, Angie has no assee

  17. truthSF says:

    @beaver, they both have no assee, and neither is classy!!

  18. TG says:

    You guys made me laugh. I agree with Love and #3 and #15 Kandy. I don’t even find her love life intersting anymore. Maybe if she dated a guy outside of Hollywood or someone who has a stable track record it would get interesting again.

  19. CB Rawks says:

    Yeah yeah Gerard Bleurgh.
    SweetDee and Mac are having a baby?! Aw!! I love them! They are hilarious!

  20. I Choose Me says:

    Melanie made me snort coffee. I think that quip was a reference to another thread non?

    @Kaiser – you know the more you feature him the more I’m starting to see Gerard’s appeal. I’d fight ya for him but I’m too busy stalking Zachary Quinto.

  21. Cheyenne says:

    Gerry sez: “We have a natural chemistry – you can see it in our magazine shoot and the film.”

    ROTFLMBAO!!! Oh Gerry, honey, who are you kidding? Every single review of your film so far says you and Jenny have no chemistry together at all.

  22. Feebee says:

    He says “schools” clearly… ha, I think Kaiser you are ‘projecting’ if you will 🙂

    He comes across as a bit of a normal, even sweet guy. Nothing suggesting of the man-slut he is reported (and probably admits) to be(ing).

  23. Cheyenne says:

    Rottentomatoes.com is posting reviews. Not good.

  24. Bea says:

    Kaiser, after each Gerry article I’m starting to like you even more 🙂

  25. Amy says:

    hilarious article

  26. Kelly says:

    Oh Gerard. You know you don’t do vanilla. Or beige, in this case. You do random slutty nasty girls who love the feel of bristles going at it where the sun dont shine.

    This is such a fauxmance I dont know where to start. I think this ho is a control-much who is far too neurotic and high maintenance for the Gerard. He can get it pretty much anywhere so why the hell would he go there? I know I wouldn’t!

  27. DoMaJoReMc says:

    He just needs to clean up the neck hair a bit…..

  28. lisa says:

    The facial hair is for his next movie.. But I am sure this time next week there will be no further connection between the two.. Especially if the film tanks. The reviews are awful. I was expecting as much. The trailers look terrible. All of the. They keep throwing out different versions. I feel like I have already seen the film..

    Dang.. I was wondering where the nightmares were coming from.

    This is a film I will skip..

  29. Guest says:

    I gotta laugh at those posters on here practically salivating over bad reviews for this film. I think there’s something wrong in your life if you take wicked joy in the fallacies of others you don’t even know based on your opinion of them which has been cultivated solely from media trajectory. There are plenty of actors/actresses I am not a fan of, but I hardly sit around waiting to pounce on their perceived failures – I just avoid them entirely. Let’s be honest, did anyone expect this to get a glowing review? It’s a studio action-rom/com…hardly the genre for critical acclaim. Doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be enjoyable to some, or that it shouldn’t have a place in cinema. Not everything needs to be “Precious.”

    On topic, the fact that Jennifer and Gerry’s mom have spoken on the phone and have planned activities together raises my eyebrows that they are more than what they are letting on. Not to mention her cooking for him – there is another quote from him that she used to bake and bring him cupcakes until she realized it was a problem and stopped (he sounded sad about this)…I’m thinking around the time of the infamous “gut and moobs” incident? Whatever the deal is, they are clearly hanging out more than the media has picked up on – as ascertained from him in interviews. So her personality can’t be as insane as many on here would like. She seems pretty chill herself and according to those who know her…maybe it’s time we ought to start believing that notion over tabloids who paint her in the way that will best earn them a dollar?

  30. Katalina76 says:

    I think they really are just 2 people who became close friends while filming a movie. Both of them deny anything else, so I don’t see why everyone is accusing them of acting like a couple to sell a movie. They have clearly stated, repeatedly, that they’re good friends. And good for them.

  31. Praise St. Angie! says:

    “I think there’s something wrong in your life if you take wicked joy in the fallacies of others you don’t even know based on your opinion of them which has been cultivated solely from media trajectory. There are plenty of actors/actresses I am not a fan of, but I hardly sit around waiting to pounce on their perceived failures – I just avoid them entirely.”

    As usual, Guest, you have something apt and poignant to say. I too wonder why people jump for joy because a person’s movie doesn’t get a good review. (oh, let’s drag that quote out again, shall we?…”haters gon’ hate”…)

    do they really care that much that they’ll take the time to seek the reviews out? I’m with you, Guest. If there’s an actor or actress I don’t like, I avoid the movie, but I don’t get all joyful if the movie doesn’t do well.

    and I sure as hell don’t go scouring the internet for bad reviews so I can crow about how sucky the movie is. really, who gives a flying f?

  32. Eileen Yover says:

    Oh thank you thank you thank you for that first pic of him staring at me! Made my heart stop when I opened this post!

  33. snowball says:

    @Guest and Praise St. Angie – thank you, I agree wholeheartedly and therefore have no need to post anything else.

    @cee, I may be missing the sarcasm, but if not – huh?

  34. just my opinion says:

    I find it funny that the same people lecturing to us to not make fun of silly Gerry and Jen, are the same ones making fun of MANY other celebs out there. Hello pot, kettle! Jen’s hypocritical fans are so easily wounded, and so blind.

  35. Cheyenne says:

    @jmo: And they don’t have a clue you’re referring to them. 🙄

    Anyhoo, love this review of TBH from Richard Roeper: “Note to Jennifer Aniston: stop playing with your hair! That’s not acting, it’s playing with your hair. “