I really don’t believe anyone as frigid as Madonna should be allowed around children. I’m afraid her stare might turn them to stone or something. But unfortunately Madonna doesn’t have to check with me before she does things (I know, I know, it stresses me out too) and according to The Sun, she’s decided to add another kid to her brood. She really must not like all the positive press that gets thrown Brangelina’s way.

Rumors have been floating around for more than a year that Madonna was trying to adopt a Malawian girl named Mercy – but several sources confirm that she has stopped adoption proceedings, due to the girl’s family’s objections – and mountains of red tape. Instead, Madge has decided to get herself an Indian girl, and apparently husband Guy Ritchie is on board, after lots of convincing.

Sandip [Soparrkar, a Bollywood choreographer who spoke with Madonna] said: “We spoke about how there are so many children in India who need homes.” Madonna - who has given up her attempt to adopt a little girl from Africa after growing frustrated with the process - and Guy initially clashed over the idea but they have now decided it will be good for the family.

A source told Britain’s The Sun newspaper: “Madonna was very taken with Sandip. He told her there were orphans who would melt her heart. Guy was against the idea, but when she wants something, she gets it. “After the stress of adopting David, Guy thought Madonna was mad to want to go through it all again. But they talked and talked and decided adopting a baby from India would be easier.”

[From Monsters & Critics]

Madonna’s adoption of David Banda was just officially approved last week, after more than two years and multiple trips back to the country – along with a ton of bad press. If nothing else, I will say that it says something about Madonna (though I’m not sure if it’s a good or bad something) that she stuck with the adoption proceedings despite the mountains of red tape and all the bad press. Either she really loves that kid or is incredibly stubborn.

Adding one more adopted child to their family might make things feel a bit more evened out, a la Brangelina. Though I’m not sure that’s the best reason to add a kid to the family. And Guy Ritchie’s reticence sure doesn’t sound like a good thing. Do you really want to convince your husband to add another child to the family that he doesn’t want? Hopefully that was embellished to make a good story. If Madonna does adopt again, that will be one financially lucky kid. But on the other hand, he’ll have to live with Madonna.

Images of Madonna and David on their trip to Africa last April.

The cover story on the latest National Enquirer is about Jennifer Aniston’s quest to adopt a baby. They say she already has the adoption process underway for a baby boy and “has been telling pals she’ll be bringing home a newly adopted son by Christmas.” Although this could just be wishful thinking on someone’s part, the Enquirer has enough supporting details to suggest this story is true. Aniston is said to have ordered renovations on her home that include a nursery, and she already has a name picked out for the boy:

The 39-year-old “Friends” beauty has shifted Operation Baby into high gear - building a $300,000 nursery, buying baby clothes and telling pals she’ll be bringing home a newly adopted son by Christmas…

And although Jennifer has at least three more films in various stages of preproduction, “her free time is devoted to finding the perfect little boy,” says her friend.

“Jen picked a name for her son from her Greek roots. She decided to name him Alexander - which means defender of men.

“She jokes that he’ll grow up to be the best divorce attorney in Hollywood…”

The Enquirer has learned the actress already has met with architects to begin further renovations on her fabulous $15 million Beverly Hills home.

“She scrapped a planned office and is instead converting the space into a first-floor nursery for her baby.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, April 14, 2008]

The Enquirer says that Aniston’s good friend Sheryl Crow, who adopted a baby boy as a single mom, was a large influence in her decision to chose adoption. They also say that despite Aniston’s busy career she thinks the time is now and plans to have help and bring the baby on set with her.

As for the story that Aniston suffered a miscarriage during her marriage to Brad, that isn’t backed up by much information and may or may not be true:

“During Jen’s marriage to Brad she suffered a heartbreaking miscarriage,” the friend continued. “Although she was able to pick up the pieces and move on, Jen has never forgotten how close she was to fulfilling her lifelong dream - becoming a mother.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, April 14, 2008]

The article goes on to quote the same “insider” as saying that “Jen is happy for [her ex husband] Brad, but she thinks how he’s gone about building a family is weird. She believes he and Angelina have expanded their family way too fast.”

We’ll have to see if any of this is true and if Aniston is actually adopting. This isn’t the first time we’ve heard this rumor, and it doesn’t sound likely to me given her work schedule. She just started her own production company and has a lot of projects coming up. Her career does offer more flexibility and ability to be with her baby than most working mothers, and more power to her if she’s made the decision to adopt.

Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson are shown on set on 4/1/08, thanks to Splash News.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt finalized their adoption of Pax Thien almost a year after Angelina first brought him home from an orphanage in Ho Chi Minh city, Vietnam. Brad and Angelina went to LA County Court on Wednesday to complete the adoption process. It was initially approved in Vietnam, and was finalized by approval of a Los Angeles judge.

Pax was originally named Pham Quang Sang and lived at the Tam Binh orphanage until the age of three and a half after he was abandoned at the hospital as a baby. He was said to have cried and hid during the official adoption ceremony on March 15 of last year, but by most accounts has settled into Brad and Angelina’s blended family well. Brad and Angelina hired a Vietnamese translator for him to ease his transition, and he seems to have found a friend and protective brother in older Maddox, 6. Pax was seen riding an inner tube down the slopes at Mammoth Mountain in California with his dad Brad Pitt earlier this week.

According to OK! Magazine, [print edition, February 22, 2008] Brad, Maddox, 6, and Pax, 4, were at Mammoth skiing for two days earlier this month while Angelina was in Iraq. They arrived on February 5 by private jet and stayed at a luxury rental home right on the mountain. Maddox and Pax took skiing lessons and were said to have “picked it up pretty quick.” The trio returned home on February 7, and it looks like they enjoyed their skiing vacation so much that they went back. The whole family was spotted at Mammoth earlier this week. TMZ has the pictures, and they’re pretty darn cute.

Brad Pitt and Pax Thien are shown in the thumbnails below taking a 4×4 ride on 1/3/08, thanks to Splash News. When I saw these pictures, the first thing I thought as a mom was “that’s not safe!” It seems like something my husband would do too with my son without realizing. Pax is also shown in Mid March, 2007, when he first left Vietnam with Angelina.

Gwyneth Paltrow really must not be pregnant, despite her hospitalization in a Manhattan maternity ward a few weeks ago. Gwynnie is trying to start a whole new celebrity adoption trend – Brooklyn babies! Well, stateside babies at least. Gwyneth has said that she and husband Chris Martin are considering adoption from her home state of New York.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin are considering adopting an orphan from the actress’ hometown of New York. Amid reports the Oscar winner is pregnant with the couple’s third child, Paltrow insists she’s keen to follow in the footsteps of pal Madonna and adopt.

She tells the New York Daily News, “We might get one from Brooklyn. No baby is more helpless than another baby. And I’m a New York girl.”

Paltrow also plays down her recent hospitalization for a ‘gastrointestinal situation’ insisting she is fully recovered. She adds, “I feel great - people made a big deal about nothing.”

[From Starpulse]

Gwyneth, I live in Brooklyn. And I can be remarkably immature. I refused to learn to tie my own shoes until I was eight, AND I was also a thumb sucker until the age of nine - and I am happy to take the habit up again if it increases the likelihood that you’ll find me adorable and want to adopt me. I fit 95% of your qualifications right there. I’m curious to hear what our readers think of Gwyneth wanting to adopt an American baby. She might be talking about adoption just to get people to stop speculating about whether or not she’s pregnant. She’s not exactly a “local girl” anymore, what with the living in London and the occasional fake British accent. Either way, she could certainly provide a nice life for a child, filled with lots of trips to Madonna’s house and macrobiotic food. What kid wouldn’t want that?

Here’s Gwyneth at Madonna’s Kabbalah… er, I mean Malawi/UNICEF benefit on February 6th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Several websites are abuzz with the news the David and Victoria Beckham may be planning on adopting a little girl, possibly from Sierra Leone. David recently went there on a charity mission for UNICEF. The Beckhams have reportedly been actively involved in several charitable organizations for several years, however they have chosen not to publicize their involvement until more recently. According to Grazia magazine, David’s trip to Africa affected him deeply, and the couple are now considering adding to their family.

David spent four days in Sierra Leone in his role as a Goodwill Ambassador for United Nations’ children’s charity UNICEF two weeks ago. During his trip, David witnessed a birth and gave immunization drops to a newborn baby.

Upon his return to his adopted home of LA, the footballer said: “I was close to tears. I had to step back and take a deep breath. I’m a very emotional person and I’m even more emotional now I’m a parent. But what stopped me crying was knowing that what these kids are going through is far worse than my feelings.”

[From the Daily Mail]

Though everyone makes fun of Posh for (presumably) being a little vapid, whenever I’ve seen David interviewed he’s come off as very sweet and affable. I don’t find it hard to believe that he really does care about the UNICEF project and was moved by the kids he visited. Whether or not the couple actually want to adopt as a result of that is more difficult to ascertain.

Beckham, according to Grazia, has told friends they are seriously considering adopting following his trip and has sought advice from celebrity pal Tom Cruise, who adopted son Connor and daughter Isabella with ex-wife Nicole Kidman.

The publication quoted a friend as saying: “Adoption is something David has been talking about for some time. If there is one subject that can move him to tears, it’s the thought of being unloved, uncared for and with no hope or future. It was only when David started planning his trip to Sierra Leone that they began talking about adoption again. It’s clear they both think adoption is great. Tom has talked to David about how adoption changed him and how he’s been able to change the lives of two amazing children.”

[From the Daily Mail]

Victoria has long said that she’d like a daughter to add to the family, and has even mentioned that she’s saving all of her gazillion handbags to hand down one day. I’ve always been a fan of the traditional heirloom jewelry, but I suppose heirloom purses are better than nothing. And God knows Victoria’s got plenty of them. She has also said that having a little girl would complete their family. Though the couple was rumored to be interested in adopting a few years ago, nothing came of it. Perhaps it was something they were interested in and never followed through, and now they’re ready to revisit it again.

Picture Note by JayBird: Pictures from David’s trip to Sierra Leone. Header of Beckham with five-year-old Senyo, who finds it difficult to walk because her muscles have been weakened by malnutrition.

You know when it’s a fabulous time to announce that you want to adopt kids? Right as you’re going through a multiple D.U.I/sex tape scandal. Nothing says “A+ Mom” to potential adoptive parents quite like a lady with a drinking problem. But that’s not stopping Vivica Fox from claiming that she wants to adopt kids. Her reason? If she had a kid naturally and things didn’t work out with the father, the kid would be a constant reminder of the bad relationship. Hey Vivica, thanks for giving all of us children of divorce one more complex.

Kill Bill star Vivica A. Fox is considering adoption because she never wants a child to remind her of a romance gone wrong. The actress, who briefly dated 50 Cent after splitting from husband Christopher Harvest, admits no man has ever convinced her that having a child naturally is worthwhile. Fox says, “I haven’t met anybody that I want to be reminded of. You gotta think about that for 18 years because, more than likely, you, as a woman, you’re gonna be stuck raising the kids. Knowing me, I’d have a baby by somebody I can’t stand and he’d (baby) look just like him (boyfriend). It’d be like, ‘Damn, here you come again today.’

[From Contact Music]

Wow, it’s good to know what my parents see when they look at me. I think if that’s your outlook on children, you probably shouldn’t have them period. Funny thing about children… they’re actually separate, unique people and not simply half you and half the other parent. It’s pretty narcissistic to just see yourself and someone else. And let’s be realistic, you’re not just going to have them around for 18 years, unless you’re a pretty bad parent. If you do it right, you’ll probably see the kid for the rest of your life. I pray pray pray to God that Vivica was trying to be funny when she said this, and it just didn’t come across. It sounds like she’s not really wild about kids… or the inevitable complexities that come with them. Yet Vivica still seems to think she’d be an awesome mom.

So the 43-year-old actress is now considering adopting a baby and becoming a single mum. She adds, “I’ve gotten a little old to be walking around pregnant (but) I’d make a wonderful mom. I’m good with kids. I love kids. It’s just that (pregnancy) hasn’t happened in my life.”

[From Contact Music]

I think her comments perfectly explain why a lot of celebrities don’t seem to make great parents. They just don’t get that it’s about the kids and not all about them. Generally when you see Vivica interviewed, she comes off as kinda crazy anyway. Those are the kind of people that make great aunts, fabulous godmothers, and awesome cousins. But they’re probably best when they’re removed from the kid by at least a few degrees.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Vivica and her infamous boob dent at the Emmys in June. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Angelina and Madonna have supposedly put aside their differences. Madonna is said to have called Angelina to offer her support after Zahara’s birth mother started talking to the press last month. The conversation so touched each of them that they wept bitterly over how difficult it is to be a super famous privileged person adopting an African infant whose impoverished family could not afford to keep them. *cough* bullshit *cough*

Madonna publicly dissed Angelina last year when a Time reporter asked her if she was “jumping on a bandwagon” by adopting an African baby. She said “Look, I could have joined the U.N. and become an ambassador and visited various countries and just kind of showed up and smiled and looked concerned. But that’s not getting to the root of the problem.” Instead she decided to set up orphanages to help indoctrinate Malawian children into her cult religion, which she considers superior to working with the U.N.

In January Angelina made a dig back at Madonna, telling a French magazine that she “would never take a child away from a place where adoption is illegal,” but quickly adding that she’s “been horrified by the attacks [Madonna’s] been subjected to [for adopting Davie].” Angelina’s rep said that the article omitted many more positive comments that she made about Madonna in that same interview.

The National Enquirer is reporting that Madonna and Angelina tearfully bonded over their mutual adoption problems and bisexual pasts but that sounds highly unlikely to me:

Madonna, upset by reports that yet another woman claiming to be the mother of Angelina’s adopted tot Zahara had popped up, phoned [her] and told her to hang in - that she’d had a similar problem when the African father of her adopted son David suddenly claimed he hadn’t understood the word “adopt.” What was supposed to be a brief call turned into an emotional sob-fest that lasted more than an hour - and ended when the moms promised to call each other once a week for support. Delighted Madonna told pals: “I have a new confidante in Angie.”

Of course I added that bonding over their bisexual pasts part, but it’s probably just as true as this is. Maybe I’m wrong and Madonna and Angelina really did pour out their hearts to each other over the phone, realizing that they’re kindred spirits. They’re both haughty highly successful women who think they have the answers to everything. They could either hate or love each other, although most signs point to hate.

I made that header image back in January and could not resist using it again.

News of the World may not be known for their highly accurate, ethical reporting, but they sure are good for a laugh. The world’s smuttiest tabloid is reporting that Britney Spears is in the “final stages” of adoption plans for Chinese twins. Because I’m sure any adoption agency would be glad to have her on their roster. Apparently Britney must fill the massive void in her heart left by sons Jayden James and Sean Preston, who are spending most of their time with father Kevin Federline – on court order. Instead of trying to clean up her act, News of the World wants us to believe that Brit’s just decided to start fresh with a new set of kids. I will give them a little credit, in that if anyone would think that the most sensible way to improve her situation would be to get some new kids, it’d be Britney Spears.

Troubled pop singer Britney Spears, who recently lost permanent custody of her two sons, Jayden James & Sean Preston to ex-husband Kevin Federline, is planning to adopt Chinese twins.

According to reports from Britain’s News Of The World newspaper, Britney, 25, has confided to pals that she’s in the final stages of talks with an adoption agency and plans to go ahead with the adoption very soon.

Friends of the singer reckon that Britney has elected to adopt the two six-year-old children from China in a frantic bid to fill the void left by losing her sons to K-Fed.

[From Showbiz Spy]

Apparently whoever works in the research department at News of the World (I have a theory that it’s actually a penguin with a red pen) didn’t bother to look into China’s super-stringent requirements for foreign adoptions. They might have made their story a tad more believable if they’d picked pretty much any other country to lie about. Last year, the China Center for Adoption Affairs changed the qualifications for foreigners to adopt and made them super-rigid (and slightly offensive to some – you now can’t adopt if you’re fat). Britney wouldn’t be allowed to adopt a child from China for about 82 reasons. First off, no singles. Before, about 8% of the children were adopted to single moms. You also have to be at least thirty years old (Brit is 26 in a few days). If you have ever been investigated by Child Welfare Services, you’re pretty much out of luck. If you’ve been diagnosed with major depression or any other mental illness or are on medication for them, you’re out. And if you’ve been diagnosed with alcoholism in the last ten years, you can’t adopt a Chinese child. They also mention that you can’t adopt if you’ve had any surgeries in the last year then you’re excluded – no word on if Brit’s Lipo-Dissolve treatments count as surgery. Something tells me Britney Spears isn’t willing to jump through all those hurdles, considering she won’t put any effort into the children she already has.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Britney is shown out on Thanksgiving, where she went shopping at Virgin Records and then spent the night at the Four Seasons. Thanks to Splash News.

InTouch has a nearly five minute video interview with Angelina Jolie’s adopted daughter Zahara’s grandmother, Mentewab Dawit Lebisoin, in Ethiopia. (The video is shown below.) During the interview Lebisoin’s voice is quiet and her mood is somber, she seems sad and deeply affected by the decision to give Zahara up for adoption. She speaks softly through an interpretor, saying that her daughter, Zahara’s mother, was alive when Zahara was given up for adoption and that she never claimed she was dead and clearly told the adoption agency that Zahara’s mother ran away. Zahara’s mother left her, Lebisoin says, because she was poor and unable to care for the baby. Although she doesn’t mention it in the interview shown, Zahara’s mother was also said to have been the victim of rape, which resulted in the pregnancy.

Lebisoin shows a photo on a laptop of her grinning daughter holding a large picture of Zahara as a baby in a carrier with Angelina Jolie. Zahara’s grandmother says she never met Angelina and that Angelina never came to see any of Zahara’s extended family when the journalist asks her about it. She says that journalists came to see her after Zahara was adopted, though.

At the end of the tape the reporter asks Lebisoin if she has ever received a letter or any correspondence from Angelina and it looks like she nods her head while she’s responding, but that’s when the tape cuts off. It seems like In Touch wants us to buy the magazine to see what she said and if she has received any word from Angelina.

There was speculation that Zahara’s mother would half-heartedly try to ask for custody of the toddler, who will turn three in January. The Jolie-Pitts have squashed all of those rumors, and say that Zahara’s adoption is “legal and irreversible.”

Lebision’s statement that her daughter is alive and that she never claimed that she was deceased contradicts earlier reports that have her bringing three different relatives to court to testify that her daughter was dead in order to secure Zahara’s adoption. In Touch reports that the adoption agency is now asking for a police investigation to see if Lebision is telling the truth.

Here’s the video, thanks to InTouch:

Zahara is shown eating an ice cream while going on a horse and carriage ride in NY with Brad Pitt on 8/29/07, thanks to Splash News.

Despite all the hoopla that “In Touch” drummed up (and we repeated) about Zahara Jolie-Pitt’s adoption, Zahara isn’t going anywhere. To be fair, “In Touch” made it clear they didn’t think there was any way that Zahara’s birth mother could get her back. They just said that she was still alive, Zahara was not an AIDS orphan, and that the mother thought she’d be able to see Zahara again and was devastated that she couldn’t. Reading the article, your heart does go out to the birth mother. She was raped, became pregnant, and was dirt poor and unable to care for her child. The grandma who gave Zahara away is another story. Though she manages to come off like a victim too, she was a bit more duplicitous. She told the adoption agency that her daughter was dead after she ran away. It wasn’t really possible to tell from “In Touch’s” article if the grandmother really thought her daughter was dead, or just said that so Zahara could be adopted. But the grandmother produced three witnesses who also verified that her daughter was dead.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s 2005 adoption of daughter Zahara was “legal and irrevocable,” the head of adoption agency Wide Horizons for Children said Thursday, calling bunk claims that the girl’s birth family is seeking her return to Ethiopia. Tsegaye Berhe spoke out to clarify the legitimacy of Jolie and Pitt’s adoption in the wake of reports that members of two-year-old’s family, including her presumed-dead birth mother, want Zahara back.

Mentewab Dawit Lebiso, a 24-year-old Ethiopian native, made the challenge, claiming to In Touch Weekly she was Zahara’s birth mother. On the adoption papers filed two years ago, it indicated that Zahara’s birth mother had died of AIDS and that the identity of her birth father was not known. Both Lebiso and another woman claiming to be Zahara’s aunt also said they didn’t fully understand what it meant to put a child up for adoption and that they believed Jolie and Pitt would be bringing the child back for frequent family visits. Berhe said that even if their account were true, the stars would be under no obligation to keep in touch with the family.

“The court in Addis Ababa approved the adoption after studying the document her grandmother wrote…saying her daughter, the mother of Zahara, had died and she was too poor to bring her up… the grandmother brought three witnesses to court who testified that Zahara’s mother had died and that her father was unknown…The court also investigated the social status of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt before approving the adoption.”

[From E! News]

If nothing else, it sounds like Zahara’s birth mother had nothing to do with giving her up for adoption. It could be argued that by running away, she gave Zahara up. But you have to remember that she was a young woman who was (presumably) severely traumatized by a rape and a new baby. She was also dirt poor and struggling to feed her baby. Overwhelmed isn’t even the right word for how she must have felt. It really does seem like the mother has almost no legal recourse at this point, though I’m guessing she’s pretty upset at the grandmother for giving her daughter away. Hopefully she’ll get to meet Zahara someday, and they’ll both have good lives.