So I guess we have to cover this dumb story. Snooki, of Jersey Shore “fame”, was arrested on Friday in New Jersey. The charge seemed to be some variation on drunk and disorderly – Snooki was “drinking in public… J-WOWW was spotted trying to talk Snooki into going back into the house. But Snooki was out of control and seemed drunk,” according to Radar’s sources. For those keeping track, she was drinking Patron, and she was officially charged with disorderly conduct.

The chief of police told Radar at the time of the arrest: “She is in our lockup right now, she is under arrest for disorderly conduct, we are waiting for the police report to come through.” She didn’t have to take a blood alcohol test, though, because she wasn’t driving. Small mercies, although I give her credit for that: so many dumb, drunk a–holes get behind a wheel, so I guess Snooki is better than them. She was released later on Friday, hopefully after she sobered up a little. One source mentioned to Radar, “If no one is with her, Snooki can keep drinking until she passes out.” And her ex-boyfriend Emilio Masella told Radar: “I think she needed this to draw attention to herself and keep up her fame level. She has more competition with the new girl. This is typical, I’m not surprised that she got arrested.”

I have to admit, I think disorderly conduct is a bullsh-t charge. Lots of college towns have cops that hand out disorderly conduct charges just to be a–holes, to get college kids to pay fines and bring in revenue for the town. Now, I have no doubt Snooki was actually disorderly, and perhaps even a threat to herself and others. But come on, it’s not like this is some huge deal, in my opinion. The chick was sh-tfaced in public, whatever. I can’t believe it, but I actually have some sympathy for her. Oh, wait, she’s an idiot. Sympathy over.

Here are some photos of police hauling Snooki’s drunk ass into jail (from behind):

Lindsay Lohan wasn’t the only one dealing with the po-po! TMZ reports that Ice-T was taken into custody yesterday, Monday, July 19. The reason? Being a hardass gangster? Nah, bitches. Ice-T was arrested for driving on a suspended sentence and not wearing a seatbelt. Ice will have to pay some FINES, BITCHES.

TMZ has learned Ice-T has been arrested in New York City.

Ice was allegedly driving on a suspended license, pulled over for driving without a seat belt and taken into custody.

Ice tweeted a while ago that he and Coco were taking their dog to the vet. Spartacus was having knee surgery.

We’re told Ice was processed at the 10th Precinct in Chelsea and released.

UPDATE: Coco just posted the following message on her Twitter page:

“Yes,Ice was arrested this morning but we don’t know what the hell for! He’s been released..We got pulled over for not wearing seatbelts.”

[From TMZ]

And Coco just updated the saga on her Twitter:

My dad drove on a suspended license too a few years ago, and the po-po just drove him home and he had to pay a fine. It really isn’t that big of a deal. I’m awaiting the Twitter smack down on Ice’s Twitter though. We know how he took care of Aimee Mann, this cop is going to be in trouble.

If I was to place a bet on which young Hollywood star was going to be arrested for possession, Chace Crawford wouldn’t have even made my top ten list. Kristen Stewart would have been number one, actually – you know it’s just a matter of time before the police come knocking on her door. But Chace? Mister I’m-A-Perfect-Texas-Gentleman? Eh. Of course there were signs that he was a bit more hardcore in real life. He and Ed Westwick were roommates for several years. And Chace dated Shauna Sand. That should prove he’s capable of anything:

Busted. Chace Crawford was arrested early Friday in Plano, Tex. for marijuana possession, UsMagazine.com has confirmed.

The Gossip Girl actor, 24, was cuffed just past midnight in a Nissan parked outside Ringo’s Pub, carrying less than two ounces of the drug.

TMZ reports that the star — a native Texan who now lives in NYC — was with a friend when cops discovered one unlit marijuana joint.

Bail was quickly posted for Crawford on his misdemeanor charge.

Crawford’s rep had no comment on the incident.

Ironically, Crawford plays a drug dealer named White Mike in the upcoming film Twelve, in theaters July 2.

[From Us Weekly]

One joint? POTHEAD! Seriously, one motherf-cking joint? That’s kind of sad that he got busted. Maybe it’s a Texas thing – hardcore cops who will bust a guy over one joint – and he wasn’t even smoking it, it was just in his pocket or his car or whatever. I’m also shocked it’s a misdemeanor – but that’s just my view of Texas. In my mind, they throw you in jail forever over something like one joint. Long-term, though, the pot bust might even help Chace’s image. It gives the pretty boy a sense of danger.

Juan-Carlos Cruz, 48, a former Food Network chef who hosted the show Calorie Commando from 2004-2007, is currently in jail awaiting $5 million bail. Cruz allegedly approached homeless men in the Santa Cruz, CA area with the prospect of killing his wife of over 30 years. Below is a report from CNN on this bizarre story, but TMZ has much more, including the detail that Cruz bought the homeless guys a cell phone and sent them semi-literate text messages. He also had the asinine idea to give the men ten $100 bills ripped in half (just $1,000) for their services, with the second halves of the bills to come after they’d committed the deed. Cruz text that he had “already been burned with whole bills then no show thats why [I will] do it this way.” The men quickly went to police with their story instead of just taking Cruz’s money like his former would-be hitmen.

A former Food Network chef accused of a murder-for-hire plot was “very meticulous,” but also “very cheap,” according to one of the three homeless men involved.

The plan fell apart when one of the homeless men who Juan-Carlos Cruz, the former host of “Calorie Commando,” allegedly recruited told Santa Monica Police, authorities said.

Cruz, 48, is being held on $5 million bail on a charge of solicitation to commit murder. He is expected to make a first appearance in court on Monday.

While Santa Monica Police released few details about the case, Sgt. Jay Trisler did confirm that three men interviewed by celebrity news and gossip website TMZ are the chief witnesses against Cruz.

The men — identified only as Big Dave, Little Dave and Shane — told TMZ that Cruz wanted them to kill his wife.

Little Dave said he was approached first and he immediately told his two friends Big Dave and Shane, who helped him communicate with Cruz.

Little Dave told a Santa Monica Police officer about the plot after he was arrested for loitering, he said.

“We’re very fortunate that we have a relationship and rapport with some of the homeless and that they were able to give us information,” Trisler said.

Santa Monica police began their undercover investigation of Cruz on May 7, Trisler said.

Cruz was arrested at a dog park in the Cheviot Hills neighborhood of Los Angeles Thursday afternoon, Trisler said.

Big Dave, Little Dave and Shane got a place to stay during the week the investigation was under way. Santa Monica Police put them in a hotel room to keep them out of sight, Big Dave said.

“They gave us two pizzas, a 12-pack of beer and a bottle of San Jose,” he said. “I love them.”

Cruz, a Los Angeles resident, was an overweight pastry chef at Hotel Bel Air until he changed his focus to promote low-calorie recipes.

When his “Calorie Countdown” show debuted on the Food Network in 2004, he said he had lost 100 pounds by eating his own cooking.

He wrote “The Juan-Carlos Cruz Calorie Countdown Cookbook: A 5-Week Eating Strategy for Sustainable Weight Loss,” which was published in 2007.

[From CNN]

Ironically, Cruz has a co-written a book that’s scheduled to come out in June called The Love Diet. Its tagline is “Eat it up, take if off, get it on,” and Cruz touts his long marriage as evidence that the recipes have aphrodisiac qualities. Cruz used to be a stout pastry chef before losing 280 pounds through lower-calorie cooking. On a blog for The Love Diet, Cruz’s co-author claims that once Cruz lost the weight “his sex life heated up and the Food Network came calling.” Only now Cruz has completely ruined his future career prospects with a cheap lame scheme to have his wife offed by homeless guys. At least the homeless guys got a roof over their heads and some food for their trouble. Cruz got some free publicity for his book, too. He’ll soon be on mess hall duty in prison and I doubt he’ll have any watercress to cook with.

Olympic skater Nancy Kerrigan is embroiled in a shocking family drama. Over the weekend, Kerrigan’s father, Daniel, died of a massive heart attack following an argument and shoving match with Nancy’s brother, Mark. Mark was later arrested in connection to the death. Police say Mark was intoxicated. It all went down in Nancy’s childhood home in Woburn, Massachusetts.

Olympic skater Nancy Kerrigan’s brother Mark Kerrigan is charged with one count of assault and battery with serious bodily injury in connection with the Sunday morning death in Stoneham, Massachusetts of the family’s 70-year-old father, Daniel.

Mark, 45, had been arguing with his father in the kitchen area of the home and “pushing him back and forth” when he collapsed, according to the Boston Herald, quoting a five-page police report of the incident. Police said they had to subdue him — as he appeared to be intoxicated — with pepper spray.

Mark told police, according to the report, that put he placed his “hands around his father’s neck,” during the conflict, and believed his father was “faking it” when he fell to the ground.

He was booked into custody at 4 p.m. EST Sunday, My Fox Boston reported.

Daniel Kerrigan’s widow, Brenda, told the paper her husband died of a “massive heart attack.”

“This is a very difficult time for me,” she said, before her son’s arrest had been made public. “He had a heart attack. That’s what it was.”

Mark Kerrigan is in police custody; he’s appearing in Woburn Court Monday morning in Woburn, Massachusetts to face the charge; Daniel Kerrigan’s funeral is slated for Thursday.

[From Radar Online]

The police report also said that it took four policemen to remove Mark Kerrigan from the home where his father died, and that he had been living there temporarily. He also has a police record and has previously served prison time. Understandably, Nancy Kerrigan hasn’t issued a statement on the incident – I’m sure she’s devastated. Kerrigan lives about 10 minutes away from her parents, is married and has three young children.

Is there anyone in the stand-up comedy world more skeevy and gross than Andy Dick? The guy is just creepy. Dick was arrested for sexual abuse over the weekend after he got a little too touchy-feely with a male patron and a bouncer at a comedy club in West Virginia. The club owner posted Dick’s bail, and the other guy, Jonathan Kraft, told TMZ he’s not pressing charges. The bouncer who was groped told police and TMZ that Dick seemed “out of it.” Shocking.

Andy Dick was arrested in West Virginia on two counts felony counts of sexual abuse in the first degree.

Dick was taken to the Western Regional Jail in Barboursville, where he was eventually released this afternoon. His bail was set at $60,000 (30k for each charge). We’re told the owner of the Funny Bone, where Dick performed last night, posted the bail.

Dick faces 1-5 years in prison if convicted.

According to the criminal complaint, Dick was talking to a guy when he “unexpectedly and without invitation grabbed the victim’s crotch, repeatedly groping then kissing him.”

Also in the complaint, a security guard at the bar says that Andy Dick “grabbed his crotch and began laughing” when the guard tried to give him an armband.

A press release from the Huntington Police Department says: “Based upon statements of two victims and independent witness accounts alleging that he had engaged in unwanted and uninvited groping of the two victims’ genital areas, Andrew R. Dick (AKA Andy Dick) of South Pasadena, Calif., was arrested and charged with two counts of Sex Abuse in the First Degree.”

Dick was in town performing at the Funny Bone in Huntington, WV. The manager, Tom Schaefer, told us Dick will go on Saturday and Sunday night as planned. He also tells us he was with Dick at Rum Runners and didn’t witness any of the alleged incidents.

Dick is currently on probation over an incident at a chicken joint, where he was arrested for sexual assault. He copped a plea to battery in 2008.

One of the guys Andy Dick is accused of sexually abusing tells TMZ he was merely doing his job when Andy grabbed him in his special place.

Phillip Daniels, a bouncer at Rum Runners in West Virginia, tells TMZ Andy Dick tried walking past him when he entered the bar, without taking a wristband. Daniels says he stopped the comedian, put the band on his wrist … that’s when Andy grabbed his crotch. Daniels tells us …when he pulled away, Dick laughed and walked off.

Daniels tells us, “You could tell he was really out of it. He was on something.”

The bouncer says someone called the cops and they showed up 20 minutes later, inquiring, “Where’s the comedian?” About eight cops went to the back, Daniels says, and walked out a few minutes later with Dick in handcuffs.

Andy Dick is facing two felony counts of sexual abuse — a male patron says Dick also groped him. If convicted, he could get five years in prison. And, Dick is also in hot water because he’s on probation for another assault case in L.A.

Andy’s lawyer says Andy “is stunned by these allegations” and he is “strongly denying any criminal conduct.”

The two people who told cops Andy Dick got a little grabby with them at a West Virgina bar weren’t the only ones he was allegedly little aggressive with on Friday night — but the third guy says … no harm, no foul.

TMZ obtained photos of Dick at Rum Runners in West Virginia right before his arrest. We spoke with Jonathan Kraft, the other guy in the pics, who tells us he’s a regular at the place and when he saw Dick, he went right up to him and bought him a drink.

Kraft says he introduced Dick to the owner and at one point, Kraft says Dick tried to kiss him. Kraft said he dismissed him, saying, “I’m not down with that.”

Kraft tells TMZ he has no intention of filing any complaint and he calls the charges against Dick “dumb” and “stupid,” saying, “He’s nationally known as a weird guy.”

[From TMZ]

Hey, Andy: greeting total strangers by grabbing their twig-and-berries might be socially acceptable in West L.A., but you were in West Virginia. Idiot. TMZ has photos of Dick just before the arrest, and it’s pretty obvious that he has no concept of “personal space,” but it doesn’t look like he’s forcing himself on anyone. Still, given the fact that Andy Dick is an all-around creep, drunk, druggie and loser, with a long history of stupid behavior, I can’t say he didn’t do it.

Andy Dick’s mugshot courtesy of A Socialite Life.

Gary Coleman, 41, has the “Whatchu Talkin ’bout” face in his latest mugshot for yet another domestic incident at his home in Santaquin, Utah. The troubled former child actor was taken in for “one count of domestic assault” and for a prior arrest warrant and put in jail on $1,725 bail. The last we heard from Gary he was talking about the seizure he suffered right before a meeting with producers of a new exploitative film that’s now available on DVD, Midgets vs. Mascots. Gary was about to protest new footage on the DVD that showed him fully nude, which he later claimed wasn’t him and was a “body double [that] is ugly, and is unattractive, and does not make me look good.” Gary has been married to his much-younger wife, Shannon Price, since 2006. Cops have been called to his home over 21 times, and Shannon admitted in an appearance on Divorce Court in 2008 (for public paid therapy, not to divorce) that Gary regularly loses his temper and “throws… temper tantrum[s] like a five-year-old.” About six months after their 2006 wedding Price admitted that she had yet to have sex with Coleman, said that they regularly went for a week or more without speaking, and detailed an incident in which Coleman threw a printer across the room because he couldn’t figure out how to receive a fax:

t’s been a rocky new year for Gary Coleman.

The Diff’rent Strokes star has been arrested on one misdemeanor count of domestic assault and is currently being held on $1,725 bail in Santaquin, Utah, TMZ.com reports.

Calls to Coleman’s lawyer and his agent weren’t immediately returned.

Police would not identify the victim.

It’s been a rough couple of years for the actor: Last year, his wife, Shannon Price, was arrested after a domestic violence incident involving the actor. In 2008, the couple appeared on TV’s Divorce Court to discuss their marital problems.

Earlier this month, Coleman, 41, was briefly hospitalized after he fell ill in Los Angeles.

The actor recently settled a lawsuit with a man he allegedly hit with his car at a Utah bowling alley in Sept. 2008.

[From People]

If Coleman can’t make bail I doubt he has the scratch to hire the counselor he so desperately needs.

Coleman’s sad life seems par for the course when compared to the other young co-stars on his 80s show Diff’rent Strokes. The actress who played his sister on the show, Dana Plato, sadly died from an overdose of prescription medication in 1999. She was just 34. The actor who played his older brother, Todd Bridges, was a cocaine addict who was acquitted of murder charges in 1988 for shooting a drug dealer. Bridges, 44, has fared ok since though and now has a recurring role on Everybody Hates Chris.

If you need any further proof that Amy Winehouse is still a hot mess and a mentalcase, here it is: the singer was arrested for an assault on a theater manager after she disrupted a children’s play at the Milton Keynes Theatre. Families with young children were in the audience of a production of “Cinderella,” but that didn’t stop Amy from yelling out profanities and physically assaulting the theater manager. And get this: when Amy was booked, she identified herself as “Amy Civil,” lending more credibility to recent reports that she is back together with fellow crackhead Blake Fielder-Civil.

Singer Amy Winehouse has today been charged with an assault on a theatre manager.

The singer was arrested after she attended Milton Keynes police station in Buckinghamshire voluntarily with her legal adviser at 1.15pm.

The 26-year-old, from Hertfordshire, was charged under the name Amy Civil with a public order offence and common assault following the incident which took place on Saturday, December 19.

The troubled star is said to have launched a physical attack on a member of staff during a performance of Cinderella at the Milton Keynes Theatre theatre.

At the performance the singer was said to have shocked children and parents by shouting ‘He’s f ****** behind you’ and yelling out ‘F*** Cinders, Prince Charming, marry me”.

Refusing to sit down, she also branded the Ugly Sisters ‘b******”.

Her outburst was said to have exasperated stars of the show, including Fairy Godmother Anthea Turner, comedian Bobby Davro, playing Buttons, and actor Mickey Rooney, as Baron Hardup.

And later she allegedly launched herself at the front-of-house manager pulling his hair, punching him and kicking him between the legs.

Amy is set to appear at Milton Keynes Magistrates’ Court on Wednesday 20 January 2010.

In July of this year, Amy was acquitted of punching a fan in the face at a charity concert.

Thames Valley Police spokesman said: “A woman from Hertfordshire has today been charged in connection with an assault at Milton Keynes Theatre on Saturday night.

“Amy Civil attended Milton Keynes police station voluntarily with her legal advisor at 1.15pm this afternoon.

“She was formally arrested by officers from Thames Valley Police on suspicion of assault and public order.”

[From The Daily Mail]

I really need someone to explain to me the British legal system. How many times is this crazy bitch going to punch people and get away with it? And what in the world was she doing at this theater in the first place – didn’t she have some crack to smoke? I stopped feeling sorry for Amy a long time ago. I don’t get how she is able to keep walking, talking and functioning when she so obviously keeps on abusing herself. Any other person who put that much crap into their bodies would be long gone. But not Amy – she’s like the Energizer Bunny of Crack.

Amy Winehouse in London (wearing acid-washed jeans?) on November 25, 2009. Credit: WENN.

Lindsay Lohan’s mom has started a website called “Lohan House” as an easily mocked way to sell the family’s castoffs online, many at a hefty price. It looks like the Lohans are hurting after those reality show checks dried up. Along with selling old clothing, shoes and purses, LohanHouse.com has a “news” section that is both undated and out of date. The site makes references to the Lohan’s reality show on E!, “Living Lohan,” as if it’s still going on despite the fact that it ended over a year ago. Dina even claimed this summer that the show ended because E! wanted her to fake a pregnancy.

In “Lohan House” the Lohans are still relevant, Lindsay is still getting work and “Living Lohan” is still on the air. Coupled with their unwanted luxury goods, the dubious Lohan “news” is enough to make you feel a tinge sorry for the youngest Lohans: Ali, 15, and Cody, 13. (There’s also Michael Lohan, Jr., 21, a student at Ithaca College who Jezebel calls “refreshingly normal” and Lindsay of course. Anyone that’s no longer a teenager can fend for themselves in that family, and they obviously do.)

One Lohan not welcome at “Lohan House” is absent dad Michael. Michael had some drama of his own this weekend when he was reportedly thrown in jail in Medford, NY for phoning his ex girlfriend, Erin Muller, who has a restraining order against him. Under the terms of the restraining order, Michael is to have no contact with Muller. According to Michael, though, he was never arrested and didn’t spend time in jail. He told Radar “I was not arrested. Erin and I had an argument. She has an ongoing order of protection against me. She called and said I violated it by making a phone call to her. I went down there today and saw the judge and I handled it and that was it.” Law enforcement sources told Radar that he was arrested, and was “picked up, processed and released.”

Michael “I tape all my phone calls” Lohan is no stranger to the inside of a jail cell. He served nearly two years in jail on multiple DUI and assault charges and was released in March, 2007. It looks like the guy is getting bored after selling all his phone tapes of his daughter crying for help and his ex buddy Jon Gosselin confiding in him. He needs to find another stupid reality star to befriend and exploit. I hear those “Jersey Shore” kids are looking for a father figure.

Former child actor Brian Bonsall, now 28, last made headlines in April, 2007 when he was arrested at home in Boulder, Colorado for a domestic abuse incident in which his girlfriend alleged he put her in a chokehold. Bonsall is best known as the little kid brought in to try and make Family Ties cuter in its last three seasons. He went on to star as Patrick Swayze’s son in 1993′s Fatherhood and in the Disney movie Blank Check in 1994. Bonsall had some minor roles after that, most notably as the son of Worf on Star Trek: The Next Generation, but eventually retired from acting to attend high school in Boulder and start a punk band.

Now Bonsall has been arrested again, this time for supposedly smashing his best friend in the face with a broken stool while in a drunken stupor. He was wanted by police in Boulder for missing a court date for that earlier case and failing to meet the terms of his probation. The most notable thing about this story is how bad Bonsall looks. In his 2007 mug shot he was sporting Dracula-style dual lip piercings and a tattoo on the the side of his neck. In this latest mug shot he has a neck full of bad tattoos with a giant butterfly in the center. It even looks like he has some kind of phallus on the left side.

Brian really clocked his friend with the broken stool, and the guy was suffering a concussion and had to be taken to the hospital. The friend isn’t talking, though, and told reporters “I’m not big with the media, and he’s my best friend.”

Bonsall, who most notably starred as Michael J. Fox’s little brother Andy Keaton on the 1980s TV series “Family Ties,” lived in Boulder for several years — graduating from Boulder High in 2000 — before leaving town and skipping a court hearing in 2008. Bonsall also starred in “Star Trek: The Next Generation” in the 1990s.

Police caught up with him about 2:30 a.m. Saturday at his friend’s home at 1121 11th St. in Boulder. According to an arrest report, officers had been called to the apartment three times that night about “fighting in one of the upstairs units” before they arrested Bonsall on suspicion of hitting his friend, Micheal Trujillo, 26, in the face with a part from a broken stool.

Trujillo told officers that he and Bonsall were arguing when Bonsall picked up a stool, broke it over a stair railing and hit him five to six times in the face. Neighbors reported hearing the fight, and one woman said she saw Bonsall apparently choking Trujillo in the hallway, according to police.

When paramedics arrived at the scene, they stabilized Trujillo using a backboard and a neck brace and took him to Boulder Community Hospital. Trujillo, when reached at home Monday, told the Camera that he’s recovering from a concussion and didn’t want to comment about what happened.

“I’m not big with the media, and he’s my best friend,” Trujillo said.

Bonsall told investigators that both he and Trujillo had been drinking “a lot” that night, and he didn’t remember what happened.

“Bonsall then said that he and Trujillo both are bipolar and like drugs,” according to the report. “Bonsall said that he takes a lot of drugs and sometimes those drugs make him forget things.”

Bonsall has had numerous run-ins with authorities in Boulder, including an arrest in 2004 for drunken driving and the 2007 arrest for assaulting his girlfriend.

In the 2007 case, police said he poured alcohol in his girlfriend’s face as she slept and threw her into a bed when she tried to leave their apartment. He pleaded guilty to third-degree assault and was sentenced to two years of probation.

Authorities suspected he violated the conditions of his probation in 2008 — by failing to pay for domestic-violence classes, missing daily breath tests and submitting a positive breath test — and a probation officer was planning to recommend at a court hearing that Bonsall be sentenced to 60 days of work release. Bonsall never showed up for that hearing, and the former child star had been wanted by Boulder police ever since.

[From ColoradoDaily via Fark]

Early last year most of the cast of Family Ties reunited for an appearance on The Today Show to promote creator/producer Gary David Goldberg’s new autobiography. Bonsall wasn’t there, though, and his character wasn’t even mentioned. What were they going to say? “Remember that annoying kid that kind of heralded the end of the show? Yeah, he became an abusive meth addict.”

Bonsall’s TV mom Meredith Baxter told magazine The Advocate last week that she was gay. People are inevitably making the joke “Give the kid a break, he just found out his mom is a lesbian.” This kid’s problems started way before that. Those neck tattoos just sealed his fate though, right?

Bonsall’s mug shots via Access Hollywood