A lot of people like Gwen Stefani, and it’s nice that she’s pregnant and married. I can’t stand her, although I do publish pictures of her and haven’t said anything about it yet. She hired a bunch of American-born Asian women to follow her around and act like they enjoy behaving like Japanese kept women. Their contract even stipulated that they couldn’t talk. Gwen may want to capitalize on the harijaku culture, but what she did is like having minstrels accompany her because she thinks African culture is cool.

Her new line of baby shoes is ridiculous. The designs are aimed at urban minorties who are more style-conscious in general, and statistically have less money. A pair of baby shoes from Gwen’s line costs $50 a pair. Babies don’t really need shoes until they can walk, but the sizes only come in sizes 0-3. My kid was a siize 5 by the time he could walk.

So Gwen’s new line of baby shoes, which she has called “so cute,” are expensive accessories meant for babies who don’t even need them.

There are people from all walks of life who want to buy expensive shit for their children. My cousin, for instance, has money and spends it on baby items that are obsolete within a couple of months. These shoes are aimed at style-conscious urban mothers who often can’t afford it. Is it Gwen Stefani’s fault that people buy crap they can’t afford and don’t need? No, but she’s catering to it. These shoes are undoubtedly manufactured overseas in sweatshop-like conditions, and could surely have a lower price. (If you have evidence that this is not true, please send a link, because I looked around.) Is Gwen the only designer guilty of this? Of course not. If the damn shoes are so expensive, though, they could at least be made in the US.

Back to our regularly scheduled escapism. Here are the shoes and Gwen herself, who just had an second over the top baby shower attended by other celebrities like Christina Aguilera.

Gwen is due to have her first baby with fellow rocker Gavin Rossdale in June.

Baby shower pictures via Just Jared, and thanks to nxdstar7 on the JJB Board for pointing these shoes out.

Britney Spears make a surprise visit to the David Letterman show last night. She joked a little with Dave, confirmed her pregnancy and read the Top Ten.

Referring to earlier banter with Paul Shaffer about Britney’s possible pregnancy, Letterman said to Britney “Are we on to something here?”

“Don’t worry Dave, it’s not yours.”

Britney looked happy and seemed excited to be there, but she kept kicking her legs, which made her come off as nervous. She was also chewing gum! You’re not supposed to chew gum during a television appearance!

After Britney read the Top Ten “Suprises of the Bird Flu Movie,” skipping the word “Tamiflu” because it was too hard, Dave said “So, we’ve established that you are in fact pregnant?”

“Yes.”

Here’s the best video currently on YouTube. Once a better one is up, we’ll post it.

CBS also has a video online through the Late Show website but it’s in Real Player format, which won’t install for us here, and you may need to disable pop-up blockers and use IE. It’s way too much work and those idiots need to update their website. Real Player went out in 1999, why are they still in business anyway?

Pictures [via]

Britney Spears attended an Elizabeth Arden event in NY yesterday to celebrate the success of her three perfumes put out by the company.

In the pictures at the event, Britney looks polished and happy. She seems to enjoy the dance contest and gets a kick out of the young dancers. In the pictures published by Wireimage, it’s hard to tell if she looks pregnant. There are candids of her leaving the event, though, that show a definite bump.

I’ve gradually changed my mind about this - Britney really is pregnant!

Britney Spears is selling a special Mother’s Day bear through 1-800-Flowers. $5 of the proceeds of each sale will benefit the Britney Spears Foundation.

She has a new song available online.
You can download “Luv the Hurt Away” featuring Full Force from BreatheHeavy.com.

Pictures [via] and [via]

Update: Some images removed on request.

The NY Daily News notes that Tom was as tall as Katie in heels at the MI3 fan screening in LA last week, suggesting the pint-sized star, who is 5′7″ to Katie’s 5′9″, was wearing lifts:

You can’t blame the guy for trying to look a little taller.

Tom and Katie have sent a baby gift basket to Brooke Shields in response to Shields’ personal note congratulating them on the birth of Suri. Now that the Tom and Brooke have newborns born on the same day in the same hospital, it’s time to bury the prozac hatchet.

Here he is with Katie out in LA. She looks tired and her nursing bra is peeking out the top of her shirt. Tom is rushing her somewhere that’s likely Scientology-related and he ignores the photographer, while Katie attempts to smile. [via]

Tom Cruise had a whirlwind tour of NY yesterday to promote MI3. He rode a firetruck down Broadway in the afternoon, then boarded a helicopter, and finally rode a subway to the premiere. The subway train was rented for $10,000 just for the occasion.

Cruise seemed uncomfortable and made some characteristically strange statements on David Letterman on Tuesday night. He didn’t go into specifics about Katie’s birth and seemed to skirt questions. People has the highlights:

Cruise tries to hide behind a lot of vague adjectives, and reader Millie notes that he acted odd and was uncomfortable with specific questions about the labor. Wonder what that means.

Cruise is also said to be auctioning off the first pictures of Suri to the highest bidder. The photos are said to be worth around $1 million.

Katie Holmes will get a sweet deal if she ever marries and divorces the crazy half pint. She’ll get $14 million according to a new prenup that’s been set up. Even if she remains single, she and Suri will be taken care of with an $8 million trust.

Now that’s not bad compensation for living a lie, is it?

Here’s Cruise in all his glory on his whirlwind tour of Manhattan yesterday.

News reports are taking this out of context. Kevin Federline was being interviewed on Power 106 radio station in California and the DJs asked him to answer “questions out of the forbidden hat.” They told him he could “tap out” at any time, and that he didn’t have to answer a question if he didn’t want to. He said he wanted a threesome with Jessica Alba in response to a question, but that’s a no-brainer, and he didn’t even know her name.

We actually listed to this crap, and here’s what he said:

When questioned, he says that Britney is a better lover than Shar Jackson although he hesitates, and he also says Britney is a better dancer than him.

While it’s rather damning that Kevin would immediately admit that he’d pick his son over his wife and wouldn’t say it’s a hard decision, it’s not that unusual to want to save your helpless child over an adult.

Kevin says in a different interview that Britney supports his music career, and that he would probably give it up if she didn’t.

Britney’s big press conference for music industry executives is today. People are buzzing that she’ll announce a pregnancy, and that she’s having a baby girl, due in October.

You can listen to Kevin’s interview online. Here is the mp3. [via]

Gwen Stefani will include some tiny tennis shoes in her Lamb fashion line. She has announced plans to release gold-colored baby shoes under her label:

She won’t have much time to do everything. She is due to have her first baby with fellow rocker Gavin Rossdale in June.

Here they are outside a restaurant in Malibu yesterday. [via]

16 month-old Zahara Jolie-Pitt suffers from rickets, a bone disorder that she developed while in an Ethopian orphanage. When she came down with a cold, Brad learned that rickets makes her more susceptible to all sorts of diseases that are common in Africa, including malaria and yellow fever. He became concerned for her health and brought her back to the states for medical care. Babies get sick a lot and Zahara will probably be fine, but this reopens the conflict between Angelina and Brad as to where Angelina will give birth:

You know Angelina will do whatever she decides, and won’t let someone else tell her where to have her baby. She is said to be planning to use a birthing tub in a Namibian hospital for a water birth. I had most of my labor in a birthing tub and found it to be very relaxing. It’s a nice alternative to medication and is said to be as effective as an epidural.

Update: Angelina Jolie’s Dateline interview:

Here are pictures from People Magazine online of the world’s most beautiful family. You may have seen most of them already, but some are new.

On April 13th, we reported that the Department of Children and Family Services announced that they closed their investigation into Sean Preston’s highchair fall accident. We mentioned that it seemed odd that they would close a case so soon, considering that it usually takes months for them to investigate. It turns out that we were right, because Britney will now receive regular visits from the child welfare agency. They have made careful statements saying there’s no “ongoing investigation,” but they’re still going to check in on her:

Seven month-old Sean was said to have suffered from a skull fracture, which may have occurred from a highchair fall or a reported fall off the couch when his father Kevin was supposed to be watching him. Sean Preston did not have a skull fracture or a blood clot, and those reports were false. He did suffer some kind of head injury that made him sleepy, though.

Britney is said to be five months pregnant with her second child. News reports went back and forth as to her pregnancy status, with the latest news stating that it’s true. When questioned about his wife’s pregnancy at a recent radio station appearance, Kevin said “I wouldn’t bet on it.”

Here is Kevin going out to dinner at the restaurant Nobu with a friend. Pictures [via]

Naomi Watts’ Oscar attire included a ripped dress and a flouncy ruffled number that may have been a misguided attempt to hide a growing baby bump. (Yes, we said this already, but a little repetition never hurts.)

Now she was spotted out at the Tribeca film fest with her boyfriend, Liev Shreiber, wearing a full-out poncho with horizontal stripes! Her face looks more filled out too.

Schreiber is said to have bought Watts a 5 carat engagement ring at jeweler Neil Lane. Watts kept her hands conspicuously in her pockets while these pictures were taken, and it’s hard to see if she’s wearing a ring.

Watts and Schreiber have been plagued by rumors that their relationship is in trouble, with The NY Daily News reporting that Schreiber is controlling and that both were looking for new partners. Reader Millie points out that The NY Daily News doesn’t like Schreiber and that they “never fail to take a stab at him.” She thinks that Watts and Schreiber each had a difficult childhood and are having trouble adjusting to a long-term stable relationship. (We have learned a lot from readers like Millie and Carrie, so please e-mail tips and insight to info at celebitchy.com.)

Watt’s friend Nicole Kidman also looks pregnant and may already be married to her boyfriend, Keith Urban. Sources say that the Kidman and Urban are planning a June wedding in their native Australia, but we think they’re already married.

Here she is at the Tribeca film festival yesterday. We can’t wait for the official news!