This has got to be my favorite story of the week. I know the week’s only started, but I don’t think many things could beat this story, at least in terms of obviously fake planted crap. Supposedly, Ivanka Trump is being considered to replace Rosie O’Donnell on “The View.” Wouldn’t that just make Donald as happy as a little peach pie? The National Enquirer reports that Barbara Walters is seriously considering giving Ivanka the gig. Of course they also referred to her as a “hottie with brains,” so we’ll see how much truth is behind this. Of course if Barbara did give her the spot, it would certainly make for some interesting dynamics on the show. Would Donald still go on tirades? Would he go on Larry King and talk about how Ivanka is a “Big fat pig” or whatever else he called Rosie O’Donnell? Supposedly, this all comes back to Paris Hilton (who’s name we shall not mention of course).

“The National Enquirer reports that Barbara Walters wants to hire the “hottie with brains” to stick it to Paris Hilton and her parents for their shabby treatment of her when they were trying to sell the Paris post-prison interview.”

[From the New York Post]

What in the world do Paris Hilton and her family have to do with hiring Ivanka Trump? Do the Trumps and the Hiltons have some Capulet v. Montague/East Coast v. West Coast feud going on that I don’t know about? I feel like something was missing here.

I was wondering what would even qualify Ivanka to be on the show, but she’s actually more accomplished that I thought. According to Wikipedia, she is the vice president of Real Estate Development and Acquisitions at the Trump Organization. Okay we can chalk that up to nepotism. However she was accepted to Georgetown and transferred to the University of Pennsylvania and graduated magna cum laude from their prestigious Wharton School of Business. Ivanka also replaced Carolyn Kepcher as a primary boardroom judge starting in the sixth season “The Apprentice.” Whether due to nepotism or not, she has good credentials. It’ll be interesting to see if she ultimately becomes a candidate for the position.

Update by Celebitchy: This originated in Mike Walker’s column in The National Enquirer. Last week he printed an item that Paris Hilton was being considered for the open spot on The View! I thought it was such crap that I didn’t bother to print it. So when Jay wonders what Paris has to do with it, that’s the story. I doubt either one of those stories is true.

It really feels like a slow news week. I usually don’t mention it, because most of the time it has more to do with me getting bored with the celebrities rather than the celebrities being boring, but it just seems like it’s dragging this week. People are still talking about Trump and Rosie’s dumb feud that should have been over two weeks ago, and into which Barbara Walters has been dragged. There’s not anything amazing happening so I’ll grudgingly cover it.

Barbara Walters said on the air that she never said anything about Rosie to Trump, and that she and Rosie are fine. There are stories in the gossip rags today saying nasty Rosie went off on Barbara for talking smack about her to Trump behind her back and then not contacting her at all about the whole public argument while Barbara was on vacation.

Now Trump is trying to show that he really did hear Barbara talking shit about Rosie, and he wrote this condescending letter to Rosie saying Barbara even contacted him afterwards. He claims Barbara told him that “working with [Rosie] is like living in hell,” and that she told him not to get into the mud with the pigs. I think that’s just an old saying that means don’t get into a big put-down match and let people drag you down to their level, but it sounds particularly bad when applied to Rosie:

Dear Rosie:
I hope you had a wonderful vacation with your wife – you needed the rest.

An article in todays New York Post indicates that you blew up at Barbara Walters for being a “liar.” Actually, I don’t blame you, but in fact she lied to both of us! After your maniacal and foolish rant against me two weeks ago, Barbara called me from her vacation (I did not call her) in order to apologize for your behavior. She very much wanted me to go on the show as soon as she got back so that she could “patch things up” (I said no). To be exact, she said that “working with her is like living in hell” and, more pointedly, “Donald, never get into the mud with pigs” and, “don’t worry, she won’t be here for long.” Barbara knows exactly what she told me over the phone and she has to live with it. Perhaps that’s why her initial statement was so mild!

In another incident, when I saw her eating at Le Cirque about two months ago and asked how “Rosie was doing,” she sarcastically rolled her eyes and said “Donald, do you have to ruin my meal.”

In any even, you have good reason to be angry. Please give my warmest regards to Kelly!

He also wrote a p.s. telling her to not be so self destructive, but I didn’t feel like typing that all up. You can read the letter on TMZ.

Now, I just read that the new Apprentice in L.A. is tanking in the ratings. It seems like that, and Trump’s fragile male ego are his reasons for continuing this stupid and pointless argument. It sure does keep him in the papers, and he can’t stand it that Barbara is making him out to be a liar.

The View has issued a statement saying that the incident Page Six reported on that Donald is referring to here, in which Rosie is said to have yelled at Barbara and called her a “f*#@ng liar,” was “just a squabble” and now they’re over it. We are so over it too, we really are.

Donald Trump gave a nasty interview before the holidays about his feud with Rosie O’Donnell in which he personally attacked her for personally attacking him on The View over the Miss USA debacle. He said that she’s fat, that he’d send someone to steal her girlfriend, and that her popular 90s talkshow failed.

Commentors note that he likes his women submissive, and that he wouldn’t put down a male enemy by calling him fat like he did Rosie.

Now he gets pissy all of a sudden when Meredith Viera asks him about Rosie. He’s the one who decided to start a big fight with her, and now he’s all upset that someone asked him about it. What an asshole.

Trump also claimed that Barbara Walters doesn’t like Rosie and wants her off The View. Walters has denied that, and says that she doesn’t regret hiring her, but Trump gave yet another interview saying he’s right that they have a bad relationship, making his latest tirade that more ridiculous.

I don’t think those two are good friends though, because Walters’ body language seems to show that she’s annoyed with Rosie in some of the clips I’ve seen of them together on the show. In case you care, Walters has returned from vacation and is now back on the stupid talkshow, which I would never talk about if there wasn’t some controversy involved. It seems like they’ve got a good formula going to get publicity.

Thanks to TMZ for posting this.

You probably heard about Barbara Walters saying that Star made a surprise announcement that she was leaving “The View,” and that she trumped her opportunity to do it “with dignity”. She knew that she was leaving “for months” and just decided to blurt it out on the show and piss everyone off. Well now Star’s not coming back, and the old ladies who live in Florida and make up the bulk of “The Views” audience will rejoice, along with all the rest of us who never watch that piece of crap show but still make fun of it.

Here’s Barbara dissing Star:

And contrary to previous reports, Star has nothing lined up for her next gig at all. Maybe she’ll go back to being a lawyer. Or she can go for the quick cash and become a spokesperson for the latest junky exercise equipment they’re touting on late night infomercials.