Can you say disgusting? Mario Lopez, most famous for starring in “Saved by the Bell” six hundred years ago, has the reputation of being quite the cad in Hollywood. Instead of trying to do decent projects, Mario seems to relish his access to skanks. He cheated on x-wife Ali Landry on their honeymoon, and has dated pretty much every woman that walks. While he did have a few respectable gigs, most notably as a very successful participant on Dancing with the Stars, Lopez decided to return to his roots: sleazy crap that no one ever pays attention to. Except for me. This past week, Mario flew to Las Vegas to host the “Boobs or Bust: Go Big or Go Home” party at Jet nightclub. Classy.

Mario Lopez might want to be a little more choosy about the gigs he accepts. Case in point: Last night’s Boobs or Bust 2/Go Big or Go Home party at Jet nightclub in Las Vegas. The former Dancing with the Stars contestant hosted the evening, which featured a contest for women competing to win $5,000 to help pay for breast augmentation surgery.

I kid you not. Here’s how it worked. The club distributed preprinted “boob bucks” to bottle-service customers. Women hoping for new breasts had to convince said customers to hand over their bucks. The gal who collected the most scored the grand prize.

[From E!]

You know he went home with at least three contestants. The article goes on to mention that Lopez was on his best behavior and kept security guards on hand to deal with any over-eager contestants. Though I’m pretty sure by “deal with” they meant “give Mario’s room key to.” Lopez has at various times denied/admitted/denied again dating Dancing with the Stars partner Katrina Smirnoff, though supposedly the pair are still together. Depending on who you believe. I have to say, I know people cheat, I know there’s a lot of reasons and a lot of arguments about it, but if you date a guy who cheated on his own honeymoon, you better not be surprised by just about anything he does. He could come home with a giraffe and two parrots and tell you they’re your new sister wives, and you better not raise an eyebrow. I’m not saying you should accept it, but you shouldn’t be surprised.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Mario Lopez is shown outside his hosting gig for “Boobs or Bust 2″ at Jet Nightclub in Las Vegas on December 10, 2007, thanks to PRPhotos.

Some people are just inherently classy, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You’ll say to them, “Hey, why don’t you relax, be a little more casual, you’re getting borderline uptight with all of your sophistication. Come mingle with the commoners.” Porn star/former California gubernatorial candidate Mary Carey is just such a lady. Not content with organizing a bake sale, Carey has decided to auction off her recently-removed 36-D implants and donate part of the money to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. The rest of the funds will go towards paying her mother’s medical bills. She jumped off a four-story building in 2006, and obviously suffered major injuries. She’s had 11 surgeries since then.

So far the bidding is at $210 with 44 bids. There’s a little over eight days left. The eBay listing notes:

Have a very “Mary” Christmas and win the best stocking stuffer of all time. Mary Carey… is giving holiday shoppers an opportunity to take home what could be the seasons’ best stocking stuffer – her recently removed breast implants.

“Now that I’m sober, I wanted a new physical state to go along with my new mental state,” said Carey. “I thought the auction would be a great way to spread some holiday cheer and to make sure someone out there has a Mary Mary Christmas.”

[From eBay]

Mary is one of the participants on VH1’s upcoming “Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. “ VH1 hasn’t said what addictions each of the participants is dealing with. But apparently the breast implants have to do with her sobriety… and her mother… Carey gives a rather convoluted reason that I could interpret several ways, if I wanted to sit around and try to get into her head.

“I’m actually overall very anti-plastic surgery,” Carey said. “I watched my mom go through 11 surgeries (for her injuries) and it’s like, for me to voluntarily put myself through that, the only right thing to do is make money and donate it to charity.” Carey said the size 36-D implants were taken out two weeks ago and replaced with larger 36-DDDs and while under anesthesia she realized they could be used to raise money for breast cancer research. “The doctors asked me what I wanted to do with them and I said, ‘You know what, I’m going to keep them and try to sell them. Because my grandmother had breast cancer,” Carey told Reuters in an interview. “Now that I’m sober, I wanted a new physical state to go along with my new mental state. I thought the auction would be a great way to spread some holiday cheer and to make sure someone out there has a Mary Mary Christmas.”

[From Gossip Boulevard]

Oh my. I don’t know what I can add to that. I guess it’s a good thing that maybe her heart is in the right place? Probably? Considering the whole situation with her mother, I really don’t feel like I should be making jokes. So I’m just trying to present the statements Mary has given, with as little commentary as possible. Wikipedia notes that Mary’s mother has Fetal alcohol syndrome, and IMDB says she’s also been diagnosed with schizophrenia. Mary’s father has s cerebral palsy. Her grandparents got custody of her when she was three months old and later adopted her. Eventually her mother came to live with them as well. I have no idea to what extent porn stars are honest about their pasts and what’s invented, but the general story on the internet is that Mary’s grandparents put her in dance classes, in which she excelled and performed with the Miami City Ballet when she was 12. She won several dance scholarships, and ended up at Florida State University’s dance team. Her grandparents both got sick and she started working as a stripper, and then a porn star, to support the family. Depending on its accuracy, it’s an interesting and sad story. Never thought I’d say this, but it makes me hope Mary Carey’s implants fetch a lot of money. Bid away, readers.

I’m pretty sure that Queen Latifah is the coolest lady in Hollywood. The rapper/sing/actress gave an interview where she talked about the changing bodies in Hollywood, noting that the definition of beauty is expanding and diversifying.

“Beauty is not just a white girl. It’s so many different flavors and shades,” the 37-year-old rapper-actress tells People magazine in its latest issue. “It’s good for regular girls because the meter (for beauty) has been a slim white girl. (In Hollywood) we’ve definitely gotten better with body type,” she says. “It used to be just me! Now with Jennifer Hudson’s success and America Ferrera, I got some successors to take the reins on this whole bodylicious thing.” Latifah describes herself as being voluptuous – “definitely curvaceous. I think I’m normal compared to the statistics,” she says. “This is a big country nowadays.”

[From the Associated Press]

I think Queen Latifah is gorgeous, and definitely knows how to work what she’s got. She’s right – America is a big country nowadays, though that’s not really a good thing, health-wise. But it’s good that Hollywood is a little more accepting of different sized people. Latifah also talked about having a breast reduction in 2003 after she lost 25 pounds but her boobs stayed the same size.

The star of “Chicago” and other films says she had elective breast-reduction surgery in 2003 to alleviate years of back and shoulder pain. “I didn’t want to get it. But I had lost 25 pounds and my breasts didn’t go anywhere! I was still carrying that load,” she tells the magazine. However, “I didn’t quite want them to be this small,” she laughs. Before surgery, Latifah says she was “an E or an F cup. I was pretty big. Now I’m like a DD. I wanted to be a triple. They took one D too many! So that was hard to deal with. … I missed my old look.” Latifah says she isn’t interested in more surgery. “There are people who love (plastic surgery) and want to cut and chop anything. I’m like, `Y’all are crazy!’”

[From the Associated Press]

I don’t know that I’ve heard many women complaining that their DDs are too small, but everyone has their own ideas. I would think that DDs could still cause a significant amount of back pain – though they’re probably a big improvement on Fs. I love what a positive attitude Queen Latifah has. She’s pretty succinct, but in a fun way. People that are always hacking at their bodies are a little crazy. It seems like she’s one of the most likely Hollywood women not to give into pressure.