Angelina Jolie has said that the only thing she argues about with Brad is politics, and maybe she told him he better not support presidential candidate Barack Obama, or maybe the report a couple of days ago that Brad was rejected by Obama’s camp was false. Brad’s rep has denied that he offered support to Obama, so he couldn’t have been told to take a hike if he never offered to help:

“Not only is the rumor not true, Brad has never even talked to the Obama campaign. Like many Americans Brad is learning more about the candidates and will make a decision about who to support in the coming months,” said Pitt’s political advisor Trevor Neilson.

[From TransworldNews]

The story originated with The NY Daily News, which quoted an unnamed source. It sounded pretty plausible to me, especially considering an earlier tabloid story that Angelina once threw wine at Brad because he supports Obama while she feels passionately that John Edwards should be the next US president.

Meanwhile the “Angelina is pregnant!” rumor is being warmed up for our eager consumption again. She canceled a speaking gig in Italy over “personal reasons” and some random person “confirmed” her pregnancy in a vague way, so it must be true:

Angelina Jolie abruptly cancelled plans for a speaking gig in Italy this week — something about how children are our future — and this has sent the Italian papers into a frenzy of speculation that she’s too busy throwing up because she’s pregnant. And somebody at the conference venue, near Rimini, said this: “Due to her privacy I can’t confirm her pregnancy, but I can say that the Italian newspapers are correct in their reports.”

[From Canada.com]

Angelina was at the International Women’s Media Foundation 18th Annual Courage in Journalism Awards on Tuesday, and while she posed with her hands crossed over her stomach at one point there was no real bump there. Cate Blanchett is surely pregnant, but instead of covering her obvious news the papers are constantly speculating on the state of Angelina’s womb. Maybe if Cate’s husband was more famous and she traipsed around paparazzi hotspots with her kids for a while we’d get more stories about her upcoming third child.

Header image is from Splash News. The other images below are from PR Photos.

This will come as a surprise to no one, but The Enquirer cover story that claimed that Jennifer Aniston finally confronted Brad Pitt after two years was based on completely fabricated “insider” quotes. I know, it’s a shocker!

Every week I see the tabloid covers come out on popbytes and get my hopes up that there will be some juicy new bombshell story, and each time I’m disappointed. Even in this instance I expected some smidgen of evidence that this was true, but there’s absolutely nothing. It just sounds like a weak version of the awesome criticism you guys hurl at the Brangelina side of this long-standing infidelity feud just about every day. (Not that I give a shit about either party at this point. It’s old news to me.)

Supposedly Jennifer Aniston lit into Brad for claiming that they were still good friends when they haven’t talked since the divorce, but all they have are quotes from a “friend” who happened to be privy to the entire non-conversation to back it up. The story is mostly filler background details about their split and the suspicious timing of Brad and Angie’s hookup. Of course Aniston is featured prominently on the cover, since it’s now known that she sells more copies, even when people put words in her mouth:

Two years after their divorce was final, Jen has launched a blistering attack on her ex husband, telling him loud and clear: “I HATE YOU!”

The 38-year-old actress politely held her tongue when Brad claimed in a recent interview that they were still close, and also when Angelina Jolie cooed that she’d “welcome” a meeting with Jen…

But now Jen has had enough…

A friend reveals Jen finally exploded when she heard that Brad pronounced she needed “to move on with her life.”

“Jen was absolutely incensed,” said the friend, who knows both Brad and Jen. “She said: ‘How dare he try to pretend everything is great between us?’”

According to the friend, a fiery Jen raged: ‘What right does Brad have to keep saying these things? Angelina can say all she likes that she didn’t steal my husband, and Brad can try and say he was all innocent. But you do the math! It doesn’t take much working out.’”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, Ocobter 29, 2007]

The article also claims that Jen is pissed that Brad has become this big philanthropist when she “knows Brad’s lazy side and how much dope he smoked.”

From what I understand, it’s perfectly legal for gossip magazines to claim they have a source and to just make stuff up. Photographs can be a source, the guy in the next cubicle can be a source, the janitor can be a source. It really doesn’t matter and just claiming someone said something doesn’t mean it’s true. You could see Aniston saying this, it’s only how anyone would react, but whether she’s still harping on it even given the fact that Brad recently made statements about her is up to question.

Angelina is facing off against Jennifer Aniston on competing covers of W Magazine this month, which features nine signed celebrity headshots by Richard Prince in separate versions of the November “Art Issue.” US Magazine is already declaring Aniston the winner, given the news that her cover issues outsell everyone else’s.

This fact is not lost on Star Magazine, and there’s a juicy new story that Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn are having secret trysts after their breakup. A reader e-mailed me the text, and I’ll cover that shortly. Like most tabloid stories, though, it has just a little bit of substance and a lot of wishful thinking.

Brad Pitt has supposedly said that he and Angelina Jolie are planning on moving to Europe and possibly making it their home base. The two have spent a good deal of time there, particularly when Angelina was pregnant with Shiloh. It’s a little hard to tell if the quotes were taken out of context, but Brad seems to imply that Europeans are more aware of the rest of the world, and that’s part of their reasoning for wanting to move there.

“While we are very nomadic, we would like to have a base in Europe. More attention is paid here to what is going on in the world and it is easier to get to Africa and Asia from here,” he told XL Semanal, the weekly magazine supplement of the ABC newspaper.

“We want our children to have a broad vision of the world. Spain, Italy and France have lots of quality of life and that is healthy,” he added.

“We still have not finished. We are very lucky to have the means to give someone an opportunity,” he said.

“But it is more than that. I can’t imagine my life without our children. If someone is thinking of adopting, I couldn’t encourage them more,” he added.

The Hollywood couple reportedly moved recently from New York, along with their four children, to Los Angeles where Jolie is shooting Clint Eastwood’s new drama “The Changeling”.

[From the Turkish Press]

I don’t have any real opinion on Brangelina – they have pluses and minuses like everyone else – but they do seem to be a little ostentatious about their worldliness at times, and that bugs me a bit. Like I said, this quote could be made up or taken out of context, but considering how much traveling they do, it does sort of make sense. I would think no matter where they live, they’ll never settle down enough to have a clear “home” so it’s probably a moot point. In all likelihood, it’ll just be another place where they own property.

The level of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s snobbery has just been elevated. The two are practically making a bio pic in a new HBO series about humanitarian workers helping the needy. Their aim is to explore the seedy political underbelly of working in a international aid organization. Jolie is no stranger to countries ravaged by warlords and political regimes. Brad gets to tag along this time too. Both members of the power couple share the title of executive producer with Scott Burns.

“Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are making their first joint producing effort with an HBO series about aid workers.

The untitled drama will explore the behind-the scenes politics of an international aid organization, and chronicle the lives of humanitarian workers assigned to dangerous zones and the needy people they assist.

Jolie and Pitt will serve as executive producers, along with Scott Burns, who will write the pilot. Burns co-wrote “The Bourne Ultimatum” and was a producer of “An Inconvenient Truth.”

The series has been a passion project for Jolie since she did the 2003 feature “Beyond Borders,” a drama about disaster-relief workers in war-torn countries.

It marks Jolie’s return to HBO 10 years after her breakthrough starring role in the cable network’s biopic “Gia,” which earned her a Golden Globe.

Pitt already is in business with HBO. Along with Edward Norton, he is executive producing the HBO/National Geographic miniseries “Undaunted Courage,” now in development. The 10-hour miniseries, based on the book by Stephen F. Ambrose, retraces the legendary journey across the Western U.S. by explorers Meriwether Lewis and William Clark in the early 1800s.

Jolie most recently starred in the feature “A Mighty Heart,” about the kidnapping and murder of Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl. Pitt was a producer on “Heart.”

[From Reuters]

Jolie has dragged the entire family around the world on goodwill missions due to her Ambassador status for the United Nations’ refugee agency. The Jolie-Pitts spent last Thanksgiving in Vietnam and trips to Cambodia replace visits to Disney World. This may be the first joint film production effort, but they have a year old foundation that support organizations that have received millions of dollars. The Jolie-Pitt foundation favors Doctors Without Borders and Global Action for Children.

Angelina is all about the less fortunate and the touchy subject dramatics. While I am not discouraging her good-doing, I just really wish to see her step outside the box. Maybe let her hair down and do a guest star appearance on “Family Guy” or become one of the plucky interns on “Grey’s Anatomy” for an episode or two.

Note by Celebitchy: Please welcome our new writer, Cara. She’s into fashion and gossip and has written for some of our favorite blogs including Socialite’s Life, I’m Not Obsessed and Glitterati. Helen had her baby this weekend and may be out of commission for a while.

Angelina Jolie is shown on the set of The Changeling on 10/20/07, thanks to Splash News.

About a week ago, I wrote an article about Maddox Jolie-Pitt leaving his school after only six weeks because Brangelina were moving to Los Angeles for Angie’s new movie. I speculated that it couldn’t be great for Maddox to have to leave schools after such a short period of time. Several commenters pointed out that Army kids move a lot, which is very true. I’m under the impression that they generally don’t have to move several times a year, and if nothing else, their parents don’t have quite the same ability to choose not to move as Angelina and Brad do. What I have to say on the issue doesn’t really matter because I’m just some random person, but the New York Daily News has decided to get a professional to jump on board.

BRAD PITT and Angelina Jolie may not be doing their four children any favors by constantly schlepping them from city to city around the world. The nomadic superstars, who have lived in at least a half-dozen cities in two years, may be hurting their eldest son, Maddox, 6, by pulling him from schools and the younger three by “not creating a stable environment outside the family unit,” said Manhattan-based psychotherapist/social worker Puja Hall, who’s been practicing for 21 years. “Maddox is an adopted child, so he already has a sense of abandonment,” said Hall. “Kids that constantly move are like army brats, in that very often they don’t want to open up to people. They feel loss, and there is a problem with attachment.”

So far, the Jolie-Pitt clan has lived in New Orleans, Paris, Namibia, Berlin and, most recently, New York, where Maddox attended the prestigious Lycée Francais for just six weeks. Now they’re in L.A., where Jolie is shooting “The Changeling.” Pitt and Jolie are rumored to have enrolled at least one of the kids at Universal Studio’s child-care center. “With the moves, the kids just don’t invest in relationships, because they’re going to lose them anyway,” Hall told Page Six’s Marianne Garvey. “They think: ‘Why bother? I’m not gonna stick around. We’re gonna pick up and go, and the loss of friends is painful.’ ”

Hall added that before Pax, 3, Zahara, 2, and Shiloh, 16 months, get any older, Angelina and Brad need to decide where to settle down. “It needs to be weighed,” said Hall. “At some point, they will have to make some important choices so the kids can form those bonds and keep them.”

That’s not the only problem - the kids also seem to be skipping the waiting lists at the schools. “We would most likely not take a child for [just] a few months, because we have a waiting list. If we take them for two months and you pay for two months, we lose money and someone on the waiting list loses a spot,” said an employee at Lycée Francais, where the yearly tuition is $18,000 plus a $2,000 contract-signing fee. “You still have to pay for at least half the year,” the staff member said.

[From the Daily News]

So it would have behooved the expert to mention that he’s (presumably) never met nor treated Brangelina’s kids, so everything he’s saying is professional conjecture, though it still carries some weight. I remember hearing a psychologist once say that human beings aren’t nearly as original as we like to think we are – for the most part, we tend to react in pretty predictable ways. Still, if Brangelina manage to instill a love of adventure in their kids from an early age, they could thrive under their unique circumstances. Angelina’s rep also noted that Maddox only attends Lycée schools (which are located throughout the country and the world), which may mean there’s more stability than we thought. It’s possible that if Maddox cycles between the same few schools through the years, he might maintain friendships with kids he meets often enough. One would also hope this means there’s a little bit of similarity between the curricula, so perhaps Maddox’s unique circumstances mean his moves aren’t as jarring as one would think.

Last month Brad and Angelina were the tabloid darlings, and their relationship was declared saved after a rough patch when a guide at the Chicago Field Museum saw Angelina roll her eyes at Brad for telling Maddox to say “excuse me” when he interrupted him. (I wish I was making that up.) The skinny actors and busy parents spent a romantic night out at a hotel bar drinking and gazing into each others eyes and all their manufactured problems dissolved into perfect wedded bliss for the gaping masses.

Now they’re said to have had another night out with Angie drinking too much and Brad *gasp* telling her to stop. People even heard him say it at the restaurant where they were eating. Angie also doesn’t want to go to Brad’s parent’s house in Missouri for Thanksgiving. That means they must be on the verge of another cover-worthy breakup.

It was a typical night out for Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Over the course of a two-hour dinner at Sir Harry’s bar in NYC’s Waldorf-Astoria hotel on Oct. 8, Angie drank three shots of vodka, five glasses of white wine and a glass of dessert wine brought down from the couple’s suite, according to several witnesses. Though Brad also had one vodka shot and some wine, he appeared to grow concerned that Angelina didn’t know when to stop. “He looked upset,” Sir Harry’s customer Richard Parsakian tells Life & Style, “but she didn’t notice.”

When a fourth shot of vodka was placed in front of Angelina, Brad decided enough was enough. “Brad said something in her ear,” Parsakian says. “You could see she didn’t like whatever he had said to her. There was a lot of whispering between them.” Finally, says a second witness, “Brad just said, ‘No more,’ loud enough for people around to hear. Their evening just folded up after that.”

Besides her excessive drinking, Angelina has been doing other things to drive Brad away. She’s also been distancing herself from his family, telling him she doesn’t want to join his parents, Jane and William Pitt, for Thanksgiving in Springfield, Mo.

Will Brad put his foot down and insist that Angie cut back her drinking? Will Angie appease Brad by spending Thanksgiving in Missouri? Find out this and much more, all in the new issue of Life & Style!

[From Life & Style]

While Life & Style features the cover story “Angelina Turns Her Back On Brad,” which supposedly refers to the drinking and a walk she took at 3 AM in NY, US Weekly focuses on how they spend too much money, having just invested $2 million in a piece of art by controversial Banksy. The Enquirer shows Jennifer Aniston on the cover, a decision they probably made based on that recent analysis showing she sells more copies, and claims that “After 2 Years of Silence Jen Finally Tells Brad ‘I Hate You’”

Radar Online offers a funny translation of all the latest tabloid stories on Brangelina, comparing the ‘loids to bored sniping housewives talking about the rich charmed couple on the block:

“They spend money like there’s no tomorrow,” says Us, who wants you to know that she enjoys a splurge every now and then, but in moderation. “That hotel suite they’re staying in is $100,000 a month. For that kind of money they could buy a whole house in Kansas City.”

“I don’t know,” says Star, examining a chip in the “Wicked” fingernail polish she bought a few seasons back when Cosmo said dark was the rage. “I mean the hotel suite has got like six bathrooms and a gourmet kitchen, and there’s a weekly magic show for the kids. It might be kind of fun.”

“But it’s not just a hotel,” Us continues. “He spent two million for some artwork by a graffiti artist; I could have one of my kids scribble something and maybe he’d buy that. And that school where they send the little Asian boy—$18,000 a year, and for what? They move so much he was only there for a few weeks anyway. Heck, Angelina bought the baby a $450 stuffed animal from FAO Schwartz.”

“I know someone who knows someone who said that the other day Brad used the hotel’s kitchen to make Mickey Mouse-shaped pancakes for the kids and blueberry yogurt and granola for Angie,” OK! gushes—and the others ignore her.

“I’m just saying, it’s not normal the way they live. She goes for walks at three in the morning in New York City!” says Life & Style (who we sort of see wearing something from Anne Taylor and looking a lot like that neighbor who ran across the block to tell your mom that your boyfriend stayed over that weekend your parents were out of town). “And the drinking. Would you believe my friend Richard Parsakian happened to be at Sir Harry’s bar in the hotel and he saw her have nine drinks—three of them shots of vodka! If I had just one, I wouldn’t be able stand, but she had three. And Richard told me that Brad just looked at Angelina and told her that was enough, which in my opinion was probably eight drinks too late.”

[From Radar Online]

Brad visited Angelina on the set of her new Clint Eastwood film The Changeling yesterday. Next week those same tabloids are going to have to come up with a way to explain how happy they look despite their problems. I’m sure they’ll come up with a good explanation for us like they do every week.

Thanks to Splash News for these photos and popbytes for the Enquirer cover.

We were all declaring Angelina Jolie pregnant after looked 5 centimeters fuller in the abdomen last month and then went out wearing a ponchp, but that maybe-bump doesn’t seem to have grown so the tabloids have conveniently forgotten about it and have moved on to speculating on the state of other female celebrities’ wombs. If Angelina isn’t pregnant, she must be trying though, right?

Star Magazine says she’s so desperate to have another biological baby that she’s turned to in vitro fertilization, but all they have is a bunch of insider quotes and no details to support their claims. It doesn’t sound true to me, but when they’re running cover stories about how “Celebrity Stylists Tell All” they may as well include a throwaway Brangelina fertility story in there for good measure.

Of course “the source” claims Angelina was told by doctors to gain some weight to increase her chances at conceiving.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are so desperate to have another biological child, they’ve turned to in vitro fertilization to make their dream come tru. “They agreed months ago that if they couldn’t do it the natural way, they would see a fertility specialist,” a source tells Star. Unfortunately, the couple hasn’t been able to conceive the natural way, so they’ve now started the in vitro process, says the source.

“Doctors have told her to gain at least 10 pounds,” says a source. They said she needs a certain percentage of body fat to help her chances of getting pregnant.”

They also say she’s overworked and has more films lined up, and that may decrease her chances at becoming pregnant. And of course she would rather adopt supposedly, but is trying for another biological child to make Brad happy.

The whole thing sounds so made up to me, especially since Brad and Angelina are followed constantly and could hardly make it to a doctors office without the paparazzi knowing about it. If they were indeed visiting a fertility clinic, there would be more details than just some “insider quotes.”

This is just a way to cover up the fact that she doesn’t seem to be pregnant again despite all our declarations that she was. If she is knocked up, she’s not showing yet.

Angelina Jolie is shown picking Maddox up from school on 10/10/07, thanks to WENN. He left the Lycee Francais school in NY after a month on Friday, and will return to L.A. where Angelina will be shooting The Changeling with Clint Eastwood.

I like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt well enough, though I don’t think they’re the second coming like a lot of people, but they’re pretty good, especially as celebrities go. The two have constantly said that their kids are the center of their lives, and considering how many of them they’re racking up, one would hope it’s true. Yet they haven’t curbed their jet setting lifestyle or established any type of clear home base for the kids, and that’s kind of worrisome. Most people agree that kids thrive on routine with a little variety thrown in, and not the other way around. After a just a little over a month at his new school, Maddox has been taken out of Lycee Francais de New York. Angelina is filming a new movie in Los Angeles, so the family is now heading there, and the kids are being yanked around again.

“After a little over a month, Maddox Jolie-Pitt, 5, had his last day at his $18,000-a-year Lycee Francais de New York in NYC yesterday, walking out with a goodbye card as a souvenir as mom Angelina Jolie escorted him home. This is at least the fourth school change for Maddox, who has also been a student in New Orleans, Prague, and L.A.

“Since the oldest member of the Jolie-Pitt brood started classes on September 4, his stay had caused a frenzy. Parents began crowding the school in the morning, taking pictures. The Lycee’s director of operations, Dan Cooke, even penned a letter September 14, urging them to respect the family’s privacy.

“The next stop for the Brangelina clan? L.A.! Jolie begins shooting the Clint Eastwood mystery The Changeling on Monday, while Brad Pitt will start production on the crime thriller State of Play on October 22.”

[From Us Weekly]

It’s hard to say if it would be better for the kids to have one home base and see their parents less, or if they should have tutors that go with them everywhere so their educations aren’t disrupted, or if bouncing from school to school is the best option. None of the options are really ideal. I just remember how the new kids in school were always treated as outsiders and a little weird – now imagine you’re the child of famous parents, and you’re the new kid a couple times a year. That’s got to make it hard to make friends and feel like there’s people you can trust. I really don’t think it’s fair to tell people not to care about their careers, but I think that if you’re going to have kids, you need to be willing to sacrifice a bit. Having to leave a new school after just a month makes it seem like the only sacrifice is coming from Maddox.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s the goodbye card given to Maddox by his classmates today on his last day of school. Images thanks to Splash Photos.

Brad Pitt, who was raised as a Southern Baptist, has a pretty interesting interview in the upcoming issue of “Parade” magazine. He says that as he entered college, he began to doubt religion, and that doubt stays with him today. He says he believes in his family and the goodness of people, and that’s where he puts his faith. In a way, it helped him discover himself by really thinking about things. I know a lot of our commenters have said they don’t think Brad is very smart, and while I wouldn’t accuse him of secretly attending Mensa meetings, I think he’s got a lot more going on in his brain than most celebrities.

Now the head of Hollywood’s most famous family finds comfort in his partner Angelina Jolie and their four children, Maddox, 6, Pax, 3, Zahara, 2, and one-year-old Shiloh. “I still have faith in that,” he says. In the new issue of “Parade” magazine, Pitt discusses his evolution from college journalism student to actor to philanthropist. Is a run for office in his future? See interview excerpts below to find out…

On inequality:
“Whoever said all men are born equal never left his own backyard. I see people everywhere without opportunity. I want to help level the playing field.”

On whether his charity work is the result of his relationship with Jolie:
“That’s idiotic! I do it because I’m a member of the human race. In Africa you see people on the street dying from AIDS, children left without parents. We’re all cells of one body, with the same emotions and desires for our families–for a little dignity and a chance for a better life. Let’s focus on that! I believe in the founding principles of America. I want to fight for that. I know most Americans feel the same way.”

On whether he’ll ever run for office:
“Oh, my God! I never thought about it. I have no desire at this point. Maybe I serve better by not going through that door. George [Clooney] should do it! He’d be quite good. I think Ben Affleck should run.”

On being famous:
“When fame really hit me was when Legends of the Fall was released three years later. You get no warning about what celebrity is or how to deal with it. It’s sort of multitiered. The initial stage is feeling discombobulated and not up to the task. I didn’t understand the incessant attention when I went outside, the way people completely focused on me. It made me very uncomfortable.

On the paparazzi:
“I mean, yesterday Angie was taking Maddie off to school. There were 30 paparazzi outside. One guy sticks a video camera in Mad’s face, yelling, ‘Maddox! Maddox!’ He doesn’t get a response. He doesn’t know my boy. Mad is already savvy to this, unfortunately. But my 2-year-old dreads being anyplace there are cameras. It scares her. They’re all in her face. My kids are faced with this every day! It’s disgusting. So we’ve been run out of L.A., all the major cities. We just can’t live there. You don’t understand–this is the hunt, the hunt, the hunt! I thought it might be over a year ago. It’s gotten worse.”

On turning away from religion:
“I didn’t understand this idea of a God who says, ‘You have to acknowledge me. You have to say that I’m the best, and then I’ll give you eternal happiness. If you won’t, then you don’t get it!’ It seemed to be about ego. I can’t see God operating from ego, so it made no sense to me.

On the ways of the world:
“We’re basically all the same. There is so much focus on our differences. Again, this thing of ego—my high school is better than your high school! We forget that we all have the same feelings on any side of the world. Why can’t we find common ground instead of this obsession with our hatreds?”

[From Us Weekly]

While I may not agree with Brad on everything, it’s hard to deny that it sounds like he’s actually thought a lot of things through that many people never bother to wrestle with. I think Angelina has been a good influence on him in terms of charity, but he was a bit of a do-gooder before he met her, just a less public one. I think Brad’s still smarter and more caring than 9 out of 10 celebrities out there, and I hope he keeps up the good work.

Picture Note by Jaybird: Here’s Brangelina at the Assassination of Jesse James premiere on September 18th. Header image of Brad at the Clayton’ New York City Premiere on September 24th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Bai Ling is one of those people that are only interesting because she’s so freaking delusional. She can’t act worth beans, prances around in the most moronic outfits in Hollywood, and thinks everyone knows and loves her, when it’s more like everyone knows her as that lady that doesn’t really make sense and always flashes her nipple. I don’t really want to encourage her manic delusions or anything, but this one is sort of funny: she thinks she and Angelina Jolie had crazy chemistry and should have gotten it on… and now that Brad’s in her life, Bai is fine with him jumping in on the good times too.

“Angelina Jolie is so hot that she even drives her female costars wild! Actress Bai Ling, who worked with Jolie on two projects — Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow and Jolie’s documentary A Place in Time says that the two shared a ‘special attraction’ during filming.

“‘I felt this energy between us, when we look at each other there’s an energy, an attraction,’ Ling told Us Weekly at our Hot Hollywood party on September 26. ‘Her eyes transfer a sexual energy to me that makes her irresistible.’ Ling said that Jolie, 32, made her a promise while on the set of Sky Captain. She recalled: ‘Angelina said, ‘Next time we’ll play lovers.’”

“So did the twosome get physical off-camera? ‘We could have hooked up, but it just wasn’t the right time or place. But she told me, “My heart’s open to you.” Ling continued: ‘She is like me. She is totally open sexually.’

“The China native said that the last time she saw Jolie was at this year’s Tribeca Film Festival. She added: “I’ve always thought Brad [Pitt] was the sexiest man on the planet. So now that Brad and Angelina are together, now maybe I could experience both at the same time!’”

[From Us Weekly]

Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. Gross. Not two women together, or even a threesome, but just the thought of Bai Ling with absolutely anything other than a ravenous tiger makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit. That woman is cra-to-the-z. I just made that up, and I’m going with it. Let’s hope it catches on. Seriously, there is this level of delusional that’s funny, there’s a level of delusional that needs medication, and then on top of both those levels, there’s Bai Ling. A bit of (unintentionally hilarious) history of Bai Ling’s delusions:

“Many of the events in Bai’s past have only been verified by Bai herself; her past in China is especially in doubt. No independent source besides Bai has verified her claims of her time spent in the Chinese army. The same is true of her time spent in New York as a visiting scholar, when her age would have made her a suspiciously young candidate for such an honor, especially given the paucity of her academic achievements. Finally, her participation in the Tiananmen Square protests would have been quite remarkable, given the fact that she attended the 1989 Moscow International Film Festival one month later as a member of an official Chinese movie group.

“Bai once claimed publicly that she was engaged to Nick Carter, but Carter immediately denied it and the two have never married. She has further claimed that she was “cut out” of Star Wars due to her appearance in Playboy magazine while also insinuating a large role for her character; George Lucas denied this, citing the facts that the edit had been done months before the Playboy appearance was known and stating that Bai’s role was only a few lines of unimportant dialogue. Additionally, Go Fug Yourself has documented Bai numerous times appearing publicly in revealing outfits that happen to “slip” and show her nipples in pictures, despite the fact that she was attending as a guest at events with no overt sexual content.”

[From Wikipedia]

Now I know Angelina Jolie has been pretty public in the past with the fact that she goes both ways – and she used to be pretty messed up, drugs and cutting and wearing vials of Billy Bob Thorton’s blood around her neck or some such thing. Though to be fair, most of us have at least half a beaker of Billy Bob Thorton’s blood somewhere in our homes, so that’s not all that bizarre, in and of itself. But given Bai’s longstanding history of lying about random shit (yeah I really believe you were at Tiananmen Square you crazy, self-serving wacko) I really doubt much of any of this is true. But I look forward to hearing about how she was actually Neil Armstrong.

Picture Note by Jaybird: Here’s some assorted Bai Ling skankiness. I spared y’all the nipple shots. Images thanks to PR Photos.