You probably already heard that Joe Francis was on Howard Stern yesterday and talked a lot of crap, at Howard’s expected urging, about the famous women he’d slept with. He said Paris gave the best BJ, and according to people who listened to the show he claimed that Tara Reid was the worst in bed because she made him wear a condom. The recap on the Howard Stern website is cleaned up a bit and just mentions that Joe said Paris was the best in bed.

What’s revealing about the Howard Stern recap is that a tired, probably high Joe references the Paris Exposed site several times and urges people to go there:

Joe claimed he wasn’t happy that the Paris tapes were released, but both Howard and Robin thought he was behind their release. However, Joe promised that wasn’t the case and was planning on suing the tapes’ distributors. Joe went on to say the man behind the tapes tried to extort him for $7 million, and, when he refused to pay that, he then released the videos. Joe also noted he owned the copyright to the tapes, so, even if they were released, he thought he should be getting money from them.

Joe then acknowledged he had sex with Paris, but denied he was ever with Lindsay Lohan. As Joe again began fading out, Howard informed him he was “a sh*tty interview” this morning, but he responded it was because of his phone connection, not that he didn’t want to talk…

Joe continued to claim he wasn’t looking to make any money off the Paris videos, but wanted to stop them from being sold instead.

When Howard asked Joe who “the best” sexual partner he’s ever had was, he named Paris. Joe proceeded to suggest people visit the Website to watch his video so they could see how “good” she was themselves. This led Howard to point out that Joe had referenced the site a number of times during the interview, which he thought was another sign that Joe was behind it. However, Joe again denied any ties to the site.

So, he name-drops the site repeatedly, which is suspicious, but that might just mean that he still wants to cash in on the free publicity and that all this went down like Paris and Joe claim. Or does it?

I did a whois on the Domain ParisExposed.com, and it was registered way back in November, 2003.

Registrar: KEY-SYSTEMS GMBH
Whois Server: whois.rrpproxy.net
Referral URL: http://www.key-systems.net
Name Server: NS1.LEASEWEB.NL
Name Server: NS5.LEASEWEB.NL
Name Server: NS4.LEASEWEB.NET
Status: clientTransferProhibited
Status: clientUpdateProhibited
Status: clientDeleteProhibited
Updated Date: 30-jan-2007
Creation Date: 07-nov-2003
Expiration Date: 07-nov-2008

Those registration names just seem to be general registration companies that cannot be traced to the real creators of the domain, and it looks like there’s a privacy block on the domain. I did whois searches on Joe’s professional sites, including his business Mantra Entertainment at Mantraent.com and Girls Gone Wild at girlsgonewild.com, and there’s no connection between the dates or companies used to register the site.

Now, who would register the domain way back in 2003 if it wasn’t Joe? Wasn’t that when he was dating Paris?

If these people acquired Paris’ stuff recently, wouldn’t they pick a domain name that they wouldn’t have to buy off someone else, like ParisHiltonsMemories.com or ParisPrivateStuff.com or something?

There is a real lawsuit available through the Smoking Gun website, in which Paris files suit against the supposed people who created this site, Bardia Persia, who is said to have paid about $2,700 for the contents of the storage locker, and Nabil and Nabila Haniss, who are said to have paid Persia a whopping $10 million for the stuff and to have created the Paris Exposed site.

If you do a Google search for Bardia Persia, Nabila Haniss, and Nabile Haniss, there are next to no results if Paris and ParisExposed.com are filtered out.

Google search for: +”Nabil Haniss” -”Parisexposed.com” -”paris” : No Results
Google search for: +”Nabila Haniss” -”Parisexposed.com” -”paris” : 3 Results about Paris
Google search for: +”Bardia Persia” -”Parisexposed.com” -”paris” : No Results

If these people were totally savvy enough to buy all of Paris’ stuff and sell it online, don’t you think they’d have some other online information about them? They created this whole slick website. If they really exist, there would be some kind of Internet history available. Also, how did Francis find out their names? There’s no name attached to the domain at all.

The main thing that blows this whole “Paris was violated” story out of the window is the fact that the domain was registered in November, 2003!

Joe Francis made his dubious fortune through the subscription Girls Gone Wild videos. Of course he would try to profit from Paris’ stuff using a similar subscription model, and she’s undoubtedly perhaps behind it too.

In case you’re still skeptical, check out the near-identical wording on the Girls Gone Wild website and a recent e-mail sent to Paris Exposed subscribers

From Joe Francis’ Girls Gone Wild Website:

Q: What do I see if I join?

A: You will have full access to hundreds of video clips, thousands of photo sets, and live video streaming. Plus, you can see exclusive web content that’s too hot for any of our regular video titles! Membership is a great deal. Click here to join now.

Looking for the Ultimate Rush? How about the hottest college coeds and the sexiest girl-on-girl action you’ll find anywhere?

From an e-mail sent to Paris Exposed subscribers:

Thank you for joining ParisExposed.com, home of the Most Exclusive Content on the HOTTEST Celebrity of our time.

The Paris Exposed Website and its alternate IP, which was mailed to subscribers on Monday, are currently down.

Update: Thanks to commentor no-one for pointing out that people on the gofuckyourself.com (NSFW ads) adult webmaster forums were talking about this. The domain was legitimately sold to someone back in November of last year, and a commentor who seems like a well-known adult webmaster on that board mentions that he’s been getting flack for selling the ParisExposed domain that he originally owned.

As for who is behind it, I haven’t yet found the thread speculating on that. There are several threads about potential affiliate programs that the commentors say seem too good to be true.

It’s also possible that the wording that is so similar on the girlsgonewild and Paris Exposed material is just common terminology that is used in the adult web business.

I’m still not convinced, and I’ll keep looking to see if I can find more information on it.

Of course the site has been shut down now by judicial order, but it’s still possible that Joe Francis is silent business partners with these guys. Let me know if you have any more details.

Imagine Kylie’s surprise when she came home one day and found uber-hottie boyfriend Olivier Martinez dousing himself in her signature women’s fragrance ‘Darling.” Luckily for Kylie the thing with hot French boyfriends is that even scenes like these — that have that slight air of tranvestism around them – just end up being hot and metrosexual. If you caught Hugh Grant in ladies perfume — you’d end up having to indulge some British kink fest with Bowler Hats and garters – maybe spanking. If it was Tom Cruise — you’d end up at a PFLAG meeting and eventually on ELLEN.

Not one to ever let even a thin bat squeak of sex go by undercapitalized –clever Kylie had a brainstorm and is now planning to follow up her super successful “Darling” with a men’s scent.

Kylie Minogue is reportedly planning to launch a men’s fragrance.

The pop superstar apparently came up with the idea when her partner, French actor Olivier Martinez, kept spraying himself with her best-selling women’s fragrance ‘Darling’.

‘Darling’ hit the stores last November and outsold many perfumes released by other stars, including Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears and Paris Hilton.

The phenomenal sales were boosted by the increasing popularity of celebrity scents, a factor which may make Kylie’s new men’s line a success.

Tim Hughes, a spokesperson for British health and beauty retailer Superdrug, said recently: “Five years ago fragrances were all about designer names and the big beauty houses such as Chanel. The only celebrity fragrances were quite marginal and rather naff. J.Lo changed all that with the launch of her first fragrance.”

So in this post-naff world of celebrity stank you can smell like Kylie’s man trying to smell like Kylie. Ahhhhh The Minogue of it.

Update: I’m putting this update at the top. There is no affiliation between Jay-Z’s “Water for Life” campaign and this SUV he designed. I wrote that title as a joke, and hoped the text of the post would make it clear that I was trying to point out that designing an SUV is not the best way to conduct your business affairs when you’re trying to bring awareness for the need for clean water in the third world.

Jay-Z unveiled the new gas guzzler he helped design for GM, a bright blue GMC Yukon Denali. Maybe the blue helps signify his “Water for Life” campaign, since designing SUVs and bringing water to the third world is so consistent:

Jay-Z and General Motors are teaming up to bring a stylish hue to a rugged sport utility vehicle. The music mogul emerged from a concept GMC Yukon Denali SUV on stage Saturday during a celebrity-filled party thrown by General Motors Corp. on the eve of media previews for the North American International Auto Show.

Painted “Jay-Z Blue,” the SUV was developed through a partnership with the rapper during the past two years. Jay-Z, whose real name is Shawn Carter, worked with the company’s global color studio to create the reflective blue color for the SUV.

“Hopefully I’ll be able to drive one of them out of here tonight,” he said.

This is the guy that chartered an extra plane for his luggage when he was doing the charity circuit for “Water for Life,” so he doesn’t quite get that conservation starts with you.

It’s great that he’s doing something meaningful and all, but if he doesn’t care about the environment or doesn’t realize that he’s contributing to its demise by making SUVs glamorous, he should pick another cause.

Britney Spears was just named the worst celebrity dog owner of 2006 after she abandoned her accessory chihuahuas after she had children. Considering that the world has yet to get a glimpse of her newest child, neglecting her pets seems to be the least of Britney’s worries. Paris Hilton came in a close second to Britney for similarly using animals as props.

Being a dimbat dog owner is much less damning than wearing fur, which kind of shows that you advocate killing animals needlessly. Using fur in a celebrity clothing line takes that arrogance one step further.

Now comes news that Puffy might be in hot water for using - get this - dog hair in his coat line. Best Week Ever reports that The Humane Society warns people that the “real raccoon” in Sean Jean winter coats might be made from raccoon dogs!

if you happen to be the proud owner of a Sean John puffy coat with “fur” trim, there’s a slight chance that fur is actually made from the skin of a dog. Or so says the Humane Society of the United States, who is claiming that Macy’s is selling the coats under the guise that it’s “imitation rabbit fur”, when the label inside the coat claims it to be “real raccoon” — and not the adorable rabid raccoons that scour your trash for last night’s dinner, but raccoon dogs… DOG FUR COATS!

So is Puff Daddy, who claims to be the designer behind Sean Jean, the Cruella Deville of the new century? The jury is still out, test results are not back yet, and we won’t know for sure for a few days. So we’re going to ask you, the readers, what you think. Go to the coat closet, reach your hand in, close your eyes, and feel that fur trim on the hood of your Sean John jacket… does it remind you a little bit of Sparky, your childhood Yorkie who went to “live on a farm” when you were 11? Because we smell a big controversy here, and it’s got wet dog stink smeared all over it.

I love how they tell you to feel the “fur,” because that gave me a little chill of disgust. I try not to sneer at old ladies in fur coats, but it’s hard not to judge.

If Puffy’s line is using actual dog hair, look for an “I didn’t know about it” statement soon. We’ll have to wait and see what those test results show.

Jennifer Lopez also uses real fur in her clothing line. Ashley Olsen, Madonna, and Beyonce have been spotted out in fur coats recently, which Nicole Richie topped PETAs worst-dressed list.

Britney Spears appeared in a clip on Access Hollywood last night promoting her fragrances for the holidays. It looks like the first time she was home in ages, and true to form the celebrity news program reports that she was out partying again that night:

Britney has purchased a new home in Beverly Hills for $7.2 million, and from the looks of this video she seems to be already set up there.

Thanks to BreatheHeavy.com for linking this video.

When pictures like this of Madonna come out, is it any wonder that her tracksuits are taking up rack space at H&M?

It’s probably just a quote taken out of context or more dirt made up by the British rags, but the latest news is that Madonna wants a little girl to add to her family, too. News reports also have Guy and Madonna fighting over her latest baby acquisition, but this could have easily been made up too.

Anna Nicole Smith and Howard K. Stern held a “commitment ceremony” aboard a yacht attended by an officator and some of their friends. While it was initially thought to be a wedding, it turned out to just be a bizarre ceremony with no legal purpose. They issued a statement condemning the press for invading their private party with jetboats delivering champagne, but it sure comes off as hypocritical now. It turns out that they invested the money from selling Daniel’s last photographs into throwing a fake wedding so they could sell the pictures and make bank.

Getty Images, the photo agency that purchased the rights to the last heartbreaking photos of Daniel Smith with his mother and newborn little brother sister, also paid $1 million for the pictures of the bullshit wedding:

Now that no one feels sorry for Anna at all, she’s getting sued by her baby’s daddy for paternity rights. Photographer Larry Birkhead claims that he’s the father of Anna’s baby, not her drugged lawyer, Howard K. Stern. Stern told Larry King that he’s the father, but skirted the question when asked if he would take a DNA test, and said he would have a paternity test only if “legally compelled.” Birkhead has called him on his comments, and has filed suit to have Anna and the baby tested for both drugs and paternity:

Anna’s just about to crawl back into the career hole she emerged from when she starred in that annoying reality series and lost a ton of weight with gastric bypass. She squandered public sentiment with opportunism. If she can’t get ahold of the billions of dollars she married her ancient second husband for, at least she can take advantage of her newfound tragic fame to make a quick buck.

We hadn’t heard from Michael Jackson in a while, and that was a good thing, because everytime news from this goon hits the media, it’s always a creepy story.

Michael’s latest venture involves creating a Leprechaun inspired -theme park in Ireland.

“Michael is deadly serious about this idea,” a source told Ireland’s Daily Mirror. “He loves the whole idea of leprechauns and the magic and myths of Ireland. It would cost around 500 million Euros [about $635 million] to do. He’s always wanted to open his own theme park and he thinks Ireland is the perfect place and it will all be built around the leprechaun theme.”

The cash-strapped singer reportedly is meeting with businessmen to raise money for the park.

Apparently, Michael is interested in molesting Irish children as well. I don’t know who would ever take their children to a park run by this whack job, but I could think of better ways to spend $635 million dollars. And it doesn’t involve Lecherous Leprechauns.

Drew Barrymore is departing from her trademark cute romantic comedy role by playing the lead in a thriller that’s being put out by her production company, Flower Films. The script is being re-worked by the screenwriter behind “Silence of the Lambs,” so it’s sure to be dark and scary:

That’s great that Drew is expanding her acting reach, and we hope the film is a critical and commercial success.

Drew is a down-to-earth actress who seems to stay out of the limelight. She keeps a good attitude about fame, and recently said she doesn’t regret any of her fashion choices:

Here she is in New York on 9/20. [via]

Joe Simpson is well know for talking about his daughters Jessica and Ashlee’s breasts, controlling their careers, and generally acting weird and incestual. Radar Online revealed that he’s now become the ultimate creepy controlling dad-manager by taking pictures of Jessica and Ashlee at events and selling them through an exclusive agreement with a photo agency. What’s more, he’s even taken psuedo-paparrazi shots of Jessica and Ashlee on vacation:

I don’t like Wireimage because unlike x17 and Splashnews, they don’t even allow bloggers to post watermarked images. Bitches sent me a cease and desist letter after I paid $10 a month to use their pictures and properly credited them every time. (It’s called the Internet, people, figure out a way to make it work to your advantage. Don’t be like the RIAA or you will alienate people and hurt your business.) It doesn’t surprise me that they would cut a deal with Simpson.

Jessica dismissed her dad in a verbal slip during her interview on “The View” two weeks ago. She said, “My mom does the whole clothing line with me. My dad just tries to control me and my sister… that was the wrong choice of words. Oops, sorry dad! I love you!”

It’s clear that no one really knows the extent to which Joe tries to control his daughters, and that must be paying off for him. He seems to be using every trick he can think of to milk them for every cent.