The fact that Charlie Sheen now has some kind of sitcom coming up on FX, despite all the truly insane things he said and did less than a year ago, is a testament to the power of the almighty dollar. I was just going over our archives on this guy, and if someone would have told me that any celebrity would have gone so spectacularly off the rails and been so public about it, I wouldn’t have believed it. Not only did he rant and rave at everyone, he gave countless interviews, he videotaped himself ranting, he made it into a live tour, and he capitalized on his memes with t-shirts and Twitter endorsements. It was kind of mind blowing, but it definitely got old and then he went away for a while. In the interim he landed this sitcom gig based on the Anger Management movie, and now he’s back. Well Charlie wants us all to know that he’s totally sane now that he’s back on TV and that he was just going through something, which he calls “episode”:

“I’m not crazy any more. That was an episode,” Sheen says, laughing, as he spoke with reporters at Sunday night’s Fox Network Television Critics Association party in Pasadena, Calif.

“I think I’m a different person than I was yesterday. Everything is a lot more mellow and focused and much more rooted in reality.”

Sheen, 46, couldn’t be more Zen about his new FX show, Anger Management, in which he will star and produce. He reports that casting is underway and that they will shoot 10 episodes in six weeks.

“I’ve been at this 30 years. It’s nice to be in a situation where the people I’m working with are excited about my input. That wasn’t the case for a long time,” Sheen says.

Of late, Sheen says instead of sounding off on Twitter, “I’ve been spending a lot of time with the kids, a lot of time with the family and I’m getting back into work mode,” adding that he is goddess-free these days. “I’m a single guy hanging out with my children.”

Asked if he has been in contact with his former Two and a Half Men costar Jon Cryer, or producer Chuck Lorre, Sheen says, “Jon and I text. Chuck, no, but at some point we are going to have to get some closure there.”

His opinion of his TV character’s funeral, which opened the sitcom’s new season last September, now that it stars Ashton Kutcher? “It was a little bizarre to watch your own funeral. It was a little mean-spirited. But it’s dead and buried now, right?”

While Sheen says it’s “premature” to name the celebrities who would like to make cameo appearances on his new show, he says “everybody” wants to take part.

[From People]

Maybe he’s no longer on a manic drug-induced high, but I bet it will be just a matter of time before he’s back on the sauce, if he isn’t already and is just maintaining. He claimed to have been sober through the power of his mind and not through any program that he refused to attend. He probably thinks he can still handle it without a problem. The last time I saw him interviewed, with his ex Brooke Mueller on ET, he was wasted but still able to speak clearly. You couldn’t say as much for Brooke since she was mumbling. So where does the drug abuse end and the crazy begin for Charlie, or is it just a big blur at this point? Does “no longer crazy” just mean he’s trying to stay sober during working hours?

Charlie is shown with his dad, Martin, on 9-23-11. Credit: PRphotos. He’s also shown at his roast on 9-10-11. Creddit: WENN

On Friday, Brooke Mueller was arrested and charged with possession and assault in Aspen, Colorado. She was arrested in a club called Escobar, which is kind of perfect (and perfectly sketchy), and according to sources, she was held in jail for the rest of Friday night, but she got out on bail in the morning. Radar claims that it was Charlie Sheen who bailed her out. Because almost two years ago exactly, Charlie and Brooke were married, and getting hammered and doing drugs together in Aspen when Charlie decided to choke the hell out of Brooke and threaten to kill her. And now he’s bailing her out. Sigh…

Charlie Sheen stepped up to the plate and posted Brooke Mueller’s bail Saturday morning, a reliable source is telling RadarOnline.com exclusively.

Her own parents, who have been trying to help her stay sober and assist with child care, are said to be furious and wouldn’t come to her rescue this time. “They actually wanted to leave her in jail,” the source says.

As RadarOnline.com reported, Sheen’s ex-wife was arrested in Aspen early Saturday morning. She was busted on a felony charge of possession of cocaine with intent to distribute and a misdemeanor charge of assault.

She was released after posting an $11,000 bond, with her first court appearance scheduled for December 19.

“Brooke’s family is done with her, she has to get straight or she is going to die,” the source tell us.

RadarOnline.com has reached out to Sheen’s rep for comment but has not had a reply.

[From Radar]

Is this what rock-bottom looks like? When you’re arrested and charged with assault and your ex-husband, CHARLIE SHEEN, is the one who bails you out? No, you probably have further to go, right? Especially if you’re Brooke. Radar also reports that her doctors and her family want her to do an intensive nine-month rehab. YES. She should totally do that.

Brooke Mueller has been told by medical professionals and her family that she needs to enroll in an in-patient rehab facility for at least nine months, but Charlie Sheen’s ex-wife is refusing to go because she doesn’t want to be away from her twin sons, Bob and Max, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

As RadarOnline.com previously reported, Sheen paid Mueller’s bail after she was arrested over the weekend in Aspen, and charged with felony drug possession, and a misdemeanor charge of assault. She was released after posting an $11,000 bond, with her first court appearance scheduled for December 19.

Brooke has battled an addiction to crack cocaine for most of her adult life, and has been told that she must enter a long term treatment facility, immediately. However, the mother of toddler sons, Bob and Max, is steadfastly refusing to go.

“Brooke has done rehab on her terms in the past. Thirty days isn’t enough for an addict like Brooke. Brooke is calling the shots, and not listening to her family, or medical professionals that are telling her she needs to be at an in-patient facility for at least nine months, and not as a day patient, as she has done in the past. Anything less than nine months is a disservice to Brooke, and frankly, is a total waste,” a source close to the situation tells us.

Mueller is “simply powerless to her addiction right now. It’s a disease and it’s very much in control of her right now. Brooke is the most amazing, caring woman, and mother, when she is sober. Brooke just can’t get in control of her disease, and if she doesn’t finally surrender to it, and listen to what her family, and medical professionals are telling her to do, she could die,” the insider says.

[From Radar]

“Brooke is the most amazing, caring woman, and mother, when she is sober.” But here’s an honest question: has Brooke been sober at all in the past, say, four years? There were rumors that Brooke was even using while pregnant with the twins, and that she was in and out of rehab during that time too. And since giving birth, she’s been looking more and more crackie. Also, I think it’s BS for Brooke to say that she doesn’t want to be away from her kids – from what I’ve seen and heard, Brooke only sees Bob and Max occasionally, and they’re being looked after by Brooke’s extended family. Sad. I wonder if Brooke has ever crossed paths with Lindsay Lohan? Who’s more crackie? I think Brooke might win that one.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

Last night Charlie Sheen and his ex wife Brooke Mueller played happy families for Entertainment Tonight with their twin two and a half year-old boys, Bob and Max. Brooke was high as a freaking kite and could barely speak while Charlie was maintainin’ and acting somewhat normal, for him. I always find it amusing when people are totally wasted on TV and everyone around them is acting like there’s nothing wrong and seems to be ignoring the problem. That’s the appeal of Kim Richards on RHOBH, and Brooke Mueller is basically the same – slurry, barely functioning, and struggling to explain basic concepts. It would have been funny if these clowns didn’t have two little boys with them who think of them as parents. I guess there are always nannies and adult film star mistresses to serve as sober caregivers.

Here’s what Brooke and Charlie said, but to get the full effect you should watch the video on ET’s website. (Their segment is at 12:00 into this video.) Notice that when Brooke calls Charlie a good dad, she immediately starts talking about how he just bought her a house with a tennis court. She’s been in rehab umpteen times and it obviously hasn’t worked for her. Charlie is still pretty wasted too.

Charlie: These guys [Bob and Max] have nothing to do with whatever. It’s not their fault but they do deserve the benefit of two parents in their life.

We’re friends and we’re co-parents and that’s what we decided is the most important thing.

Brooke: Charlie and I are so blessed and fortunate to have such amazing kids, and that’s really the glue that holds our friendship and relationship together…

He’s an amazing father. He’s amazing with the kids ’cause he teaches them sports, plays baseball with them. In fact he just bought me a house, well for the boys, and it has huge tennis courts with lights and everything.

There’s a selfless nature about her and that’s the only way you can really be available for your children is to be compassionate and be selfless.

They go on about co-parenting, but I’m really just reporting this so that I can share these screengrabs of Brooke’s crazy face. Charlie was wasted too, but he hid it better. I think that Brooke and Charlie get along when they’re both really high on whatever. Again it would be funny if they didn’t have kids. I hope that Charlie’s ex Denise Richards steps in and tries to be an influence in Max and Bob’s lives. They need more sober adults around. Also, those boys are adorable.

Charlie is currently working on the film A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charles Swan III . Brooke recently sold the home that she used to share with Charlie in Los Feliz that was left to her in the divorce.

All photos are screengrabs from Entertainment Tonight, where you can see this segment

I’ve watched a few episodes of Two and a Half Men prior to now. Usually that was the result of being stuck in a waiting room or an airplane with absolutely no other programming options. It’s a dumb show with canned laughs, but at times it did crack me up. So I went into this with low expectations, which were met I guess. I mean it sucked. The show opened with Charlie’s funeral, where his ex lovers trash talked him and listed off his sexual fetishes. There were plenty of dumb jokes and groan-inducing one liners. A few were kind of funny though. Here’s my very brief recap. Evil Beet has a better one you’re interested.

Rose explains how Charlie died, by “falling” in front of a moving subway train after she caught him cheating on her. “I want you to know that Charlie didn’t suffer. His body just exploded like a balloon full of meat.”
Jake asks “does anyone else feel hungry?”

They establish that no one can afford the house now that Charlie has passed. Later, when Alan is alone, Ashton Kutcher comes in to use the phone after unsuccessfully trying to commit suicide by drowning. He tells someone on the other line “I want you to know that I just flung myself in the ocean because I can’t live without you. No, I’m not calling you from the ocean. Because it was cold.”

Ashton’s tech billionaire character Walden: “Money does not buy happiness.”
Jon Cryer’s character, Alan. “I don’t know I’ve never had either.”

Ashton then strips down to his skivvies to change. Then they go out to some TGI Fridays type place to bond over drinks. Ashton picks up two chicks with his sad sap story, and the two of them bring the ladies back to Charlie/Alan’s place. Ashton scores a menage a trois and gets laid while Jon Cryer’s character goes to bed alone with no nookie.

The next morning Walden/Ashton proceeds to walk around shirtless/nude while everyone exclaims at his penis size. Then he announces he’s buying the house.

At least the whole episode was only 20 minutes or so. It wasn’t terrible, just kind of there.

A lot of people tuned in to watch Ashton’s half dressed debut, though. The show got over 27 million viewers and a Nielsen rating higher than any single episode when Charlie starred. So it’s safe to say that Ashton will be sticking around. Don’t cry for Charlie, though. He just made $25 million from Warner Brothers for his past episodes and could get $100 million for syndication rights over the next ten years. I guess it was money he was owed or something, but still that sounds outrageous.

Jon Cryer is and will always be a class act even if he does star on one of the most throwaway (and inexplicably successful) shows on television. He’s such a self-effacing guy, who can joke on one hand that he checked TMZ to see what Charlie Sheen was up to during those months of cocaine-filled briefcases, hookers, and nonsensical rants; yet he can still candidly admit that he had no idea that Sheen would derail so quickly when it came down to the wire. To promote the new season of “Two and a Half Men” (alongside his new co-star, Ashton Kutcher), Cryer sat for an interview to the Hollywood Reporter. While he makes it quite clear he reached out to Charlie Sheen during that infamous time period, Cryer also states for the record that the two actors have not spoken since their last day on set together. Charlie’s loss, right? Here’s a few other relevant excerpts:

On His New “Two and a Half Men” Co-Star: It’s kind of fun. It’s a very different dynamic that they’ve set up between Alan and Ashton’s character. It completely works.

How He Felt When Charlie Got Fired: A combination of shock and sadness because this wasn’t the way anybody wanted the show to end. And then fear — because at that point, let’s face it, I didn’t know if Charlie was going to be living another week.

On His Reaction To Ashton Signing On: My gut reaction was, I have no idea what that show is going to be like. [Laughs.] But the weird thing for me was this mythology that was created about the show and a feud between Chuck [Lorre] and Charlie. The tabloids took this whole thing and ran with it, and I just never saw it. Actors always have things that they’re not thrilled about on a show and have a hobby of bellyaching about those things. Charlie had his share of them, but nothing along the lines of an explosion. It was very strange to see Chuck’s actions be interpreted as a feud with Charlie when, if you’ll remember during that whole thing, when stuff was being said about him, he said nothing.

On His Acting Career: I’m feeling great about where I am right now. I’ve had a great run on a show that I really like, and we’re getting another shot at it. I’m also getting these crazy opportunities, like being in a production of Company with Stephen Colbert and the New York Philharmonic. I can’t imagine Jon Cryer performing with the New York Philharmonic isn’t one of the signs of apocalypse.

On The Character He Most Closely Associates With: Duckie. That was me in high school. And what has been nice is that character has really stuck around for people.

On What Duckie Would Be Doing Today: I think that anything that I could name would diminish it. It’s like when you go to the reunion and you see that guy you always thought was a quirky, fun, interesting person and he grew up not to be that. I don”t want to have that happen for people with Duckie.

[From Hollywood Reporter]

That bit about a fabricated feud is interesting, but I think that Cryer is subtly referring to the fact that Chuck Lorre was the one who spent a great deal of time holding his tongue because, certainly, Sheen’s mouth has always been a perpetual stream of verbal diarrhea as far as Lorre is concerned. Yet I understand that Cryer isn’t the type to talk trash about anyone (not even Charlie Sheen), and that’s just the kind of person he holds himself out to be.

Meanwhile, Cryer received his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame yesterday with his wife, Lisa Joyner, in attendance as well as his “Two and a Half Men” co-stars. Ashton showed up looking like a dirty hippie, but at least he make an appearance to lend support. If Sheen were still on the show, he wouldn’t have even taken a moment away from sniffing the blow off a hooker’s backside to support anyone besides himself.

Photos courtesy of WENN

Denise Richards was a guest on the Jimmy Kimmel show last night. I had a hard time paying attention to the things she said because she was boring as usual and I was mesmerized by the glow emanating from her skin. I swear I could hear it buzzing faintly in a recurring pattern. Cooked turkey-looking Denise was promoting her new memoir, The Real Girl Next Door. She told the same story we’ve heard from her before, about how she figured out that she was surrounded by hookers and johns that fateful night at dinner at the Plaza Hotel in New York when her ex Charlie Sheen wigged out on a prostitute. In Denise’s version she’s both naive and open minded about the situation, which is how she tells it in her book as well.

Denise described her book as a “tell some” instead of a “tell all” and said that Charlie was fine with it. Of course he is, this woman makes him look better every time she opens her mouth. I’m sure it pays off for her to be on Charlie’s good side as well. She’s skirting a fine line between acknowledging that Charlie has issues and not pissing him off at all and so far she’s done that wonderfully. If only she could reach that same kind of balance with her fake bake. Denise explained “I have Charlie down, I know how to take care of him. But not that way. We have a brother and sister relationship now.”

When I first saw these photos I thought that the lighting must be off to be making Denise look that cooked. Check out the videos below though. She really is that fried.

Denise Richards on Jimmy Kimmel Part 1. Denise tells the hookers at dinner story around 2:00

Part 2. She talks about Charlie’s porn family at around 1:00. “At first he wanted me to move in with them, which was a kind invitation but I’m like, ‘this I cannot explain to the kids.’”

Here she is in June with a normal hue:

Fake bake photos credit: Pacific Coast News. Other photo credit: WENN

Denise Richards is on the cover of US Weekly promoting her new memoir, The Real Girl Next Door. They have excerpts from the book along with an interview with Denise. As she’s done all along, Denise remains very classy about her ex, Charlie Sheen, and refrains from trashing him. She even says that she’s not going to cut him out of her daughters’ lives and is working to make sure they have a good relationship with their father. Denise finally gives her side of the story on Charlie’s infamous NY hotel freakout on a porn star/hooker, when she was staying across the hall with her daughters and a nanny. It’s not very salacious, though, and just gives Denise’s take on that night and how it affected her. She doesn’t even speculate on what the hell Charlie was thinking, nor does she say one bad word against him. You can tell she was embarrassed, though, and that it wasn’t easy for her to have dinner with a bunch of hookers that night.

“Charlie invited me to this dinner with ‘friends,’ and once I realized what these women did for a living, I thought, ‘It’s one meal; you can suck it up and get through it,’” Richards, 40, recalls of dining with Sheen’s porn star pals. “It’s not my place to judge how they make a paycheck.”

Richards goes into further detail in her new memoir, Real Girl Next Door (out now). “After I quieted [our daughters Sam, 7, and Lola, 6] down, I climbed into bed; I had to get up early for my press. About an hour later, I was awakened by sounds outside my door, including walkie-talkies, which is never a good sign,” she writes. “A few minutes later, the cops showed up. Several officers went into Charlie’s room, and a sergeant came into mine.”

As the sergeant struggled to make sense of the situation (“Your ex-husband is staying in the room across the hall while you’re in this room?” he asked Richards. “And you went to dinner with him and there were hookers there at the table?”), the actress kept her composure and told him everything she knew.

“Charlie was put into an ambulance, and I rode with the sergeant to the hospital, though I insisted I had to be back at 4:30 a.m.,” she writes. “After making sure Charlie was stable and settled, the nice policeman gave me a ride back.”

Given her long, dramatic history with Sheen, 45, why does Richards continue to have a relationship with her ex? “I’ll never cut off contact with Charlie,” she tells Us. “He’s my girls’ dad. As they’re older they’ll deal with him how they can.”

“A lot of women can’t relate to being married to Charlie Sheen or divorcing Charlie Sheen,” she adds, “but they can relate to feeling sad, angry, scared and upset.

[From US Weekly]

I read the whole US Weekly article in the print edition, and there’s barely anything more worth quoting. She talks about her multiple boob jobs and having two bad plastic surgeons who put in implants that were too big before she finally got them to a size she was comfortable with. She also denies breaking girl code by dating her ex friend, Heather Locklear’s ex husband, Richie Sambora, back in 2006. Denise claims that she and Richie were both going through divorces at the time and that she wasn’t betraying Heather’s friendship since they weren’t friends at that point anyway. We’ve heard all this from Denise.

It’s totally commendable how she’s refrained from stating the obvious – that Charlie is off the rails and is not fit to watch her dogs, nonetheless her kids. Still, it would be a hell of a lot more interesting if she would admit that the guy is a complete whack job and that she dodged a bullet by getting him out of her life. She’s doing the right thing for her daughters, though, and probably for her bank account. I’m sure that Charlie’s money is helping her be much more delicate about the whole situation. Anyone who married Charlie Sheen and flaunted a relationship with Richie Sambora can’t be that classy.

Denise is shown on 7/26 and 7/27. Credit: Fame and WENN

Denise Richards is making the rounds to promote her memoir, The Real Girl Next Door, which she takes great pains to explain is not a Charlie Sheen-bashing book but, instead, will share their beautiful love story. She really could’ve spared us that detail, but Denise has also been very busy lately adopting a baby girl and holding a baby shower. Plus, she’s currently in the midst of her morning show tour. These photos are of Denise outside her visit to FOX studios, and it looks like someone got a wee bit carried away with the sparkly arm stuff. I love the color and swishiness of the dress, but Denise looks like she’s auditioning for a role as Breaking Dawn extra:

In addition, Denise also popped over to the “Today” show and chatted for awhile with Matt Lauer about her book:

On Her Relationship With Charlie Sheen: Well, everyone asks me why I married him, which I get into in the book. but — and the man I fell in love with is very compassionate, humble, has a wonderful heart, and the behavior that a lot of us saw in the last six months is not the person that I met and fell in love with. The details of our actual divorce are private between Charlie and I. I get into, in the book, more about how I felt. I think a lot of women and men who are going through divorce can relate to the feelings of being angry and scared and guilty and whatever. That’s what I wanted to touch on and hopefully be relatable to other people instead of the details of what actually happened.

On Shielding Her Daughters From The Warlock Phenom: As far as the media, I shield them completely but there’s a few things they would hear, you know, through other kids. And there was a point where I — the recent stuff of everything that we all saw on the shows and all of that I did not discuss. But I did have to have a conversation with them about addiction and got a book to read to them because I was just lying to them so much and covering up and telling lies. It was just getting too confuse confusing that I needed to sit down with them.

I think it’s too early. They’re so young. I think that they — the book is written for children, so I think they did comprehend some of it. As they get older, they’ll learn more as needed. But I told them enough that they needed right then. I think for them to make sense of some things that were going on.

On Rumors That She Broke Up Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora’s Marriage: It was extremely difficult. And if I did break up a marriage or have an affair I would — I’ve been through so much, I would admit it and take it on the chin and admit my mistakes. I could have handled that situation different. But the fact of the matter is he was divorced, I was divorced, and then, you know, we got together and that was what happened. I get into a little bit of that.

On Why She Wrote The Book: I went through so much. I couldn’t get a job. I was dealing with my mom dying who did die. I was going through a horrible divorce. All these awful headlines. And it was a very difficult time. And also with Richie, his father was diagnosed with cancer two weeks after my mom and they both had passed away shortly, you know, after that. So it was very hard. I want someone who is going through a decision, whether it’s divorce, lost their job, whatever it is, and you feel — I hit rock bottom. And to have hope that you can get to the other side and there is light at the end of the tunnel.

On Whether She’s Worried About Charlie: Of course. He’s the father of our daughters, and I still care very much for him and want him well. But he’s also a survivor and if anyone can pull themselves together, it’s Charlie.

[From Today]

I give major props to Denise for her continued attempts to maintain diplomatic relations with the likes of Mr. Deluded Tigerblood. It’s always difficult to put on friendly airs with an ex-spouse for the benefit of the children, and I can’t even imagine how awful it would be to do so when that ex just happens to be Charlie Sheen. One day, Sam and Lola will grow up and read about their father’s unhinged, drugged-up behavior, and they’ll realize that their mother was doing the correct thing by protecting them from the spectacle during their formative years. So Charlie isn’t and will never be truly “winning” in life or as a parent. Denise is the real winner here.

Here’s video from the “Today” appearance as well:

Photos courtesy of WENN

About a month ago, CB asked whether anyone would watch Charlie Sheen if he got a new sitcom, and the resounding answer in the comments section was “No!” Of course, Charlie doesn’t listen to common sense, so he persisted in leaking rumors about his alleged new show. Unfortunately, those not-so-subtle whispers have become a reality, and People reports that Charlie Sheen will soon be returning to a small screen near you. In other words, get your sledgehammers ready, folks:

Charlie Sheen has reason to be happy – even if his latest role is not.

The former “Two and a Half Men” star is set to make his way back to the small screen in a television adaptation of the 2003 movie Anger Management.

Sheen, 45, who was famously fired from the sitcom during a battle with the show’s creator Chuck Lorre over his behavior on and off the set, will play an ex-athlete balancing his own temper problems and those of the criminal defendants he counsels – the character Jack Nicholson originated in the Joe Roth-produced film.

“Charlie is excited about going back to work and looks forward to playing a different character other than ['Two and a Half Men's'] Charlie Harper,” Sheen’s manager, Mark Burg, whose production company Evolution Management is one of the show’s creators, tells PEOPLE. “I can guarantee you that Charlie will not be wearing a bowling shirt on the new show.”

“I chose ‘Anger Management’ because, while it might be a big stretch for me to play a guy with serious anger management issues, I think it is a great concept,” Sheen says in a statement released by Lionsgate TV. “It also provides me with real ownership in the series, a certain amount of creative control and the chance to be back in business with one of my favorite movie producers of all time, Joe Roth.”

Roth has previously worked with Sheen on the films Major League and Young Guns.

[From People]

Ugh. While there’s no news on which, if any, network will pick up this disaster in the making, I’m sure that viewers will disappoint us by tuning in en masse. Also, since Comedy Central will air its “Charlie Sheen Roast” on September 19th in a timeslot specifically chosen to compete against Ashton Kutcher’s debut on “Two and a Half Men,” there’s no reason to doubt this new show will also air in the same timeslot once things get rolling. On a related note, exactly why is Comedy Central bothering to roast Sheen in the first place? Every joke that can be told about Charlie Sheen has already worn out its proverbial welcome.

Photos of Sheen visiting a medical building for unknown reasons on 7/5/11 courtesy of Fame

It looks like all you have to do to go from an escort and adult film actress who does just everyone and everything on camera to the cover of Playboy is to screw a famous guy. Charlie Sheen’s “goddess” #1, Bree Olson, is featured on the August issue. Advance details of her interview have her talking up Charlie Sheen as a lover and claiming she never did anything sexual with the other goddess, Natalie Kenly, who hung around longer than Olson did but eventually ditched Charlie too. (Probably once the money started drying up.)

She may have broken up with Charlie Sheen in April, but Bree Olson insists she’s “still a goddess. I’m just not Charlie’s goddess.”

How did the 24-year-old Indiana native end up with the troubled actor, who was fired from Two and a Half Men in March? “I suppose it was my movies,” Olson, who has appeared in more than 250 adult films, tells the August issue of Playboy.

When Sheen, 45, first contacted Olson (whom he had never met), the actor invited her over to his house for a meet and greet. After hitting it off, the adult film star — along with Natalie Kenly — soon began cohabiting with Sheen in his Sherman Oaks, Calif. mansion.

“He’s intelligent, he’s charismatic, he’s superfunny,” Olson (real name: Rachel Oberlin) says of the actor. “And he’s good in bed. I mean, he’s had a lot of practice.”

Despite rumors to the contrary, Sheen was “gentle and considerate” in between the sheets, Olson says. “He’s just a rock star. He’s a powerhouse. He’s a very sensual and sexual person, and when I was with him I felt as if we became one together, because he’s just so enticing sexually.”

As for the sex she reportedly had with Kenly? “That was a lie,” Olson now says. “I didn’t really even know her. Okay, all three of us got together, I think, twice. They did their thing together, and Charlie and I did our thing together. And we had two different beds. She and I would go to whichever bed, and he would pick. You know, ‘Where am I sleeping tonight?’”

Currently single and living in Los Angeles, Olson tells Playboy she’s retiring from the adult film industry to focus on becoming a real actress. “I can do this,” she says. “I’m so winning right now.”

[From US Weekly]

Is anyone else skeeved out by the thought of Charlie Sheen making an O face with those gold teeth of his? Bree is being demure and trying to act like she didn’t have sex with the other “goddess,” and it was just straight sex with Charlie. It took me five seconds to google and find a scene where she has sex with famous porn actress Sasha Grey, so it’s not like she’s never screwed another woman. She’s also done just about everything else on camera. Maybe she’s telling the truth though and she only does sex with women for pay. (Strike that, it’s not like Charlie wasn’t paying her.)

Other mistresses of famous guys do sex tapes to make money after they gain a little notoriety, but it’s not like Olson didn’t do that to death already. Now she’s going to be a “legitimate” actress. She did get the cover of Playboy, that’s a start. Maybe Sheen will cast her on that mystery sitcom he keeps leaking to the press that’s about to happen but never materializes. That must have been her motivation to make sex with a bipolar crack-smoking lunatic sound like a harlequin romance novel.

Photo credit: WENN.com