If you were to ask anyone remotely familiar with Monty Python which sketch is best known, the overwhelming majority would undoubtedly say the dead parrot sketch shown above. In the bit, John Cleese returns his recently purchased dead parrot to the pet shop he bought it from. The pet shop owner, played by the second funniest Palin (link leads to video), Michael Palin, tries to convince Cleese that the parrot is not actually dead, nor was it when it was bought. Like everything Python, for years we’ve believed that the genius of Cleese and Palin was completely original, but like so many other things, it turns out the Greeks did it first.

dead, that’s what’s wrong with it.”

For those who believe the ancient Greeks thought of everything first, proof has been found in a 4th century AD joke book featuring an ancestor of Monty Python’s Dead Parrot sketch where a man returns a parrot to a shop, complaining it is dead.

The 1,600-year-old work entitled “Philogelos: The Laugh Addict,” one of the world’s oldest joke books, features a joke in which a man complains that a slave he has just bought has died, its publisher said Friday.

“By the gods,” answers the slave’s seller, “when he was with me, he never did any such thing!”

In a British comedy act Monty Python’s Flying Circus sketch, first aired in 1969 and regularly voted one of the funniest ever, the pet-shop owner says the parrot, a “Norwegian Blue,” is not dead, just “resting” or “pining for the fjords.”

[From Reuters]

The ancient joke book was written by a couple of wacky Greek comedians known as Hierocles and Philagrius. It is believed that they put together the compilation of jokes, but didn’t necessarily write them. The jokes, which many have said are still used today just in modernized versions, have been made into a multi-media e-book. 71-year old British comic Jim Bowen delivers the ancient joke in front of an audience for the recording, which can be purchased online.

The English-language book will appeal to those who swear that the old jokes are the best ones. Many of its 265 gags will seem strikingly familiar, suggesting that sex, dimwits, nagging wives and flatulence have raised laughs for centuries.

In many of the jokes, a slow-witted figure known as the “student dunce” is the butt of the jokes. In one, the student dunce goes to the city and a friend asks him to buy two 15-year-old slaves: No problem,’ responds the dunce. If I don’t find two 15-year-olds, I’ll get one 30-year-old.’

In another, someone asks to borrow the student’s cloak to go down to the country. “I have a cloak to go down to your ankle, but I don’t have one that reaches to the country,” he replies.

[From Reuters]

If nothing else, your 7-year old will be rolling. Although, it is mentioned that there is a portion of the recording that is only funny if you’re aware that lettuce was considered an aphrodisiac in ancient Greece. That gives Keanu Reeves’ obsession with the shredded lettuce sandwich a whole new spin, now doesn’t it? He may very well be a sexy genius!

There are alot of adjectives to describe Ricky Gervais, funny, clever, witty, just to name a few, but according to Gervais, himself, sexy isn’t one of them. The British comedian says he’s not sexy, but he’s ok with that.

The British comic star - who is in a long-term relationship with author Jane Fallon - has never thought of himself as an attractive man.

He said: “Looks are still the most important thing for women when it comes to meeting a partner. And that’s fair enough, but a sense of humour is really important too. For starters, it’s a great indicator of whether you are going to get on. If the first time you go on a date you don’t find each other funny, there’s a fundamental problem. Laughing at each other’s jokes is one of the keys to a good relationship.

“I don’t see myself as sexy but I am happy with that. I don’t think a comedian should even be concerned with being cool or sexy - as soon as you do, you aren’t a comedian any more.”

[From FemaleFirst]

Russell Brand might beg to differ, although, Gervais might beg to differ that Brand is funny, I don’t know. There are definitely sexy comedians out there, Eddie Izzard, anyone? I’ve got a fire in silly places for Craig Ferguson that no number of lines on his face will douse. So just like regular joes, they don’t have to be gorgeous to be sexy. There is so much more to sexy than looks.

Ricky Gervais has been in a relationship with author Jane Fallon for so long he can’t remember what it was like to be single. He says women don’t throw themselves at him because he’s “not sexy”, but also because they know he’s taken.

Ricky also revealed he would hate to be single because he would have no idea how to approach a woman he liked.

He added to Britain’s Cosmopolitan magazine: “Women certainly don’t throw themselves at me because I’m funny - they know I’m in a relationship anyway. I’ve been with my girlfriend Jane for so long now, I wouldn’t know where to start!

“I can’t even remember chatting anyone up!”

[From Female First]

There is something intrinsically sexy about people who make you laugh and they have to really be unattractive to fight that fundamental allure. Rosie O’Donnell, not sexy. Lee Evans, hilarious, but not sexy. Ricky Gervais is not unattractive, but he often plays characters that have unattractive personalities or are otherwise unapproachable. But I’d be willing to bet there are some closeted Ricky-loonies who would love to make him stumble through some awkward chat-up lines.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Here’s Ricky Gervais shopping for antiques on 9/28 in London and out with his partner, Jane Fallon, on 7/27/08. He’s also shown in the header outside the Regis & Kelly show on 9/15. He looks so happy to be papped.

To further prove that there is no justice in the world: Paris Hilton is getting her own superhero comic book. And not some cheesy stupid one that she’s having to pay someone a lot of money to make in her attempts to further over saturate the world with her Picasso-esq image. She’s collaborating with none other than Stan Lee, of X-Men, Spider-Man, Fantastic Four, and the Hulk fame. Not bad.

Paris Hilton has revealed she is creating a new superhero based on herself.

The hotel heiress has been working with Stan Lee, who co-created the Spider-Man comic books, to invent a character for a new MTV cartoon. While Paris refused to divulge any details of the new collaboration, she did reveal her favourite superhero power. She said: “I’d love to be invisible – that would be fun!” Paris is no stranger to lending her name to various projects. The 27-year-old beauty has her own perfume range, a line of hair extensions, a footwear line, and will release a sports collection later this year.

[From News.com.au]

How in the world does Paris Hilton go from cheap-ass perfume and even cheaper acrylic hair to working with someone as iconic as Stan Lee? I don’t know jack about comics, but even I know he is like the best of the best. Paris’ face shouldn’t even be allowed to grace one of those annoying cheesy caricature drawings half-assed artists doodle in two minutes in Central Park. When you look at her closely, Paris actually does sort of look like a life-sized caricature. Especially those feet.

I can’t help but wonder just how accurate the Stan Lee SuperParis will be. Will she have a magical bird nose that senses when baby animals need worms? What kind of superpower will that half-open eye have? Maybe the ability to somehow never have corrective surgery, despite being stuck to a woman who won’t stop pimping herself.

Here’s Paris Hilton shopping at Barneys New York in Beverly Hills on Saturday. Images thanks to WENN.