The Coachella festival raged on for a second weekend, and there are tons of new photos, but this was like Coachella reject weekend. In other words, there was no Alexander Skarsgard in attendance to double fist Viking beer and generally hang around looking hot. And there were no Robsten sightings to awkward up the place either. Instead, we’ve got Gerard Butler, who loves Coachella because it’s his very favorite place to enjoy porta potty sex with randoms. I think last year’s festival was the breaking point for Kaiser’s enduring crush on the dude, and I can’t blame her because that sh-t is nasty. My own, long-dead fascination with Gerard lasted about five minutes after watching 300, and then the guy tried to lazily pass off his Scottish brogue for an Irish accent in P.S. I Love You, and I was done with him for good. If that hadn’t done the trick, I’m sure porta potty sex would have sufficed to gross me out enough too.

Here are some more photos from Coachella, weekend deux. Courtney Love was there and was a total mess, of course. I imagine she plotted to accost Gerard in a porta potty before completely losing her train of thought.

Jessica Alba seems out of place at Coachella. She probably worried the entire time about all of the plastic bottles that were poisoning everyone at the festival.

Mischa Barton seemed really out of it and overdressed for an event where people lounge around on the grass.

I think Paris Hilton and River Viiperi are basically living at Coachella now. Man, Paris really needs a new shtick.

Hey, it’s Robert Ackroyd from Florence + the Machine. He and Katy Perry debuted their romance at last year’s festival, and now he’s but a distant memory in a douchecloud of John Mayer.

Remember the revolting Brandon Davis? He’s lost a lot of weight, but he still looks like a greasy bear.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

I’ll be honest here and admit that when I first spotted this image, which purported to be part of the new Saint Laurent spring campaign, I honestly thought it was one of those incredibly annoying and not-so-funny April Fool’s jokes. That theory sounds plausible, correct?

Well, it’s not a joke, and Marilyn Manson is indeed the newest face of Saint Laurent as revealed by the Instagram account of Nicola Formichetti, who is the creative director for French fashion house Mulger. Formichetti is apparently a huge fan of the new campaign that features Marilyn wearing a rather subdued (for him) round of black lipstick and eyeliner with a very rock ‘n’ roll leather jacket. Is Saint Laurent trying to overhaul its image and appear “edgier” to consumers? I guess they could do worse than Marilyn Manson in that regard. Oh wait … they have done just that by adding Courtney Love to the campaign.

Some of you older types (like me) will notice that at least Kim Gordon of Sonic Youth is appearing in this campaign as well. As a whole, these ads will be known as creative director Hedi Slimane’s Saint Laurent Music Project. Before some of you suggest that perhaps Yves Saint Laurent himself is rolling in his grave as we speak, the designer was once known for collaborations with musicians like David Bowie and Marianne Faithfull. While Manson and Love aren’t quite as lofty as Bowie and Faithfull, they’re all icons (like it or not). Even Courtney, who is the perfect example of a rock ‘n’ roll trainwreck, is iconic in her own way. Sure, these ads make sense even if they do feature a not-so-pretty “shock rocker.”

Photos courtesy of Instagram and WENN

Here are photos of Courtney Love at Sundance where she is undoubtedly raiding the swag rooms. Hahaha. That was actually just a joke, but then I started to wonder why Courtney attended Sundance at all, and Page Six has detailed her swag coup under a list of “greedy celebs“ who attend the annual festival to raid the gifting suites: “[A]fter a couple of minutes and a few obligatory press pictures, Love walked away with a $695 Kudsak leather jacket, $600 worth of Johnny Was tops, and a $2 bottle of Hint water. After all, it’s easy to get dehydrated when you’re swagging on the slopes.” Easy work if you can get it, right?

Meanwhile, Courtney just doesn’t know when to shut it. Of course, this is a chronic problem for her, and in just the past year or so, she’s talked about how if Kurt Cobain came back, she’d have to kill him; how her benzos addiciton is all Winona Ryder and Andy Dick’s fault; and how she wants to marry a titled nobleman and become Lady Love. She also accused Dave Grohl of trying to seduce Francis Bean and claimed to be Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety coach, which is hilarious because if was true (which it wasn’t), Courtney was pretty much saying that she is the worst sobriety coach in the universe.

Now Courtney is running her mouth again to ABC News, which is listening for whatever reason, and she’s talking sh-t about Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale’s marriage. Essentially, she says that Gavin is running the whole show and even does all the work for Gwen’s fashion lines. What the hell?

Courtney Love sounds a little bitter over Gwen Stefani’s success and her marriage to Gavin Rossdale.

In ABC News’ profile on the outspoken Hole singer, she claims that she dated Rossdale before he got together with Stefani.

After noticing a Yves Saint Laurent coat that the No Doubt singer wore on January’s Vogue cover that Love coveted, she says in her interview, “Funny thing, you know, I would’ve never really bet on Gwen. Not back in the day.”

Love claims that Stefani’s success and her “[bleep]ing empire” of a clothing line, L.A.M.B., can be credited to her musician husband.

She also claims that because Rossdale’s band Bush never found continued mainstream success after the nineties, he now runs Stefani’s career.

“His band never did that well but he is very, very smart,” she says. “He runs the Gwen show, that’s him. He runs the clothing line, he [bleep]ing built that up, he has nothing else to do.”

She adds, “He was so good looking, but I kind of envisioned that me and Gavin Rossdale would end up on the French Riviera, like, taking tennis lessons and [bleep]ing our respective polo teachers.”

[From Page Six]

I think we all realize that Courtney, who has long claimed that she slept with Gavin while he was with Gwen, has no idea what she’s talking about when it comes to Gwen’s career and Gavin’s alleged masterminding thereof. I do think that there is tension in Gwen and Gavin’s marriage (like most marriages), and Gwen may very well end up at a nice spa getaway soon after trying to do it all, but I don’t think that Gavin is the one sitting around dreaming up crazy-ass haircalf wedge shoes and metallic cargo shorts. Courtney basically is dreaming crap up in her own head and decidng that’s the truth of the matter. And for the record, Bush was a very successful band in the 1990s with three multi-platinum albums. Gavin might be struggling to rebuild the band and reach his former musical success, but it’s not like “he has nothing else to do” but act as a behind-the-scenes tyrant. Shut up, Courtney.

Here’s Gwen and Gavin out on Saturday with the kids while shopping for topiaries. They probably just shook their heads at Courtney’s silly, drugged-up words.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Courtney Love has a new piece in Grub Street New York. Thankfully, she’s not discussing Kurt Cobain, drugs, sex or Frances Bean. She is only talking about food… sort of. It’s basically a “Week In The Life” piece on C-Love, focusing only on what she consumes – you can read the full thing here, because I‘m only going to excerpt some of the crazy. There are some gems in the piece – she name-drops Andre Balazs, Michael Stipe, Mario Batali, Bono and of course Gwyneth Paltrow. My favorite part is about Gwyneth, of course. I’m assuming that C-Love agreed to do the piece as part of some cross-promotion for her art show – you can see some of her “art” here. Here are some highlights, just random quotes really:

How C-Love wakes up: “Every day I have my house manager, Hershey — who I stole from the Mercer Hotel with André Balazs’s blessing — wake me up with a hot washcloth for my face, a leg rub, and a plate of toast soldiers. Then someone always gets chicken potpie and potato salad from D.D., you know, Dean & Deluca. If I can’t afford D.D., I just don’t eat.”

Paris Hilton always has fresh cake: “One thing from living next to Paris Hilton in L.A. … she always had a fresh cake in her house. So I make sure someone gets a full, fresh new one every day, like marzipan. My house manager tries to put it in the fridge, but I don’t like refrigeration. I know, so Portlandia of me. But I’m sorry, I’m from Portland! That’s what I eat. Every day. And then I need sugar from 4 a.m. to 5 a.m.”

A different way of eating: “I took my soccer-mom/lawyer sister with Michael Stipe and some people from U2 to Babbo, and it changed the way she ate forever. It’s like when a fat, American woman goes to France and she realizes there’s another way to eat. By the way, the only meal I’ve had that’s better than Babbo is Brooklyn Fare. It’s all about Brooklyn Fare, dude.”

She hates chocolate: “I hate chocolate. F–k chocolate. Kurt hated chocolate, too — that was one of the things we had in common. Chocolate makes it all too easy. Oooh. Woww. Chocolate. Oooh. Yum. F–k that. It’s sorta like how I don’t love the Ramones. It’s a flaw. Or, I love Mr. Springsteen as a person, I’m just not a superfan. Everyone lovvves the Boss, but that’s chocolate for me. It’s just, like … no. I’m all about the pineapple upside-down cake and google “crème brûlée circuit.” I coined that s–t.”

Gwyneth basically told her to lose weight: “Sometimes I forget to eat. Right now I’m 125 pounds and five foot, eleven inches, but my “rock weight” was 160. I think I’m a sexy beast at 160, but Gwyneth is the one who told me that if you want to act, and I do want to get back to acting, “You are your own advertisement.””

A diet that works: “I once lost a ton of weight from a fish-sticks-and-lemon-water diet. That’s how I started my own band; I had to lose all that weight first, apparently. Anyway, I love lemon water; it’s the key to life.”

On wine: “I’m not a big drinker, but Bono once gave me a bottle of Pétrus in France. It gets you so stoned in a really opiated way, like you’d just taken a Vicodin. A month later I found out it cost $12K! But before that, I was like, “Dude, they should get that to the junkies!” After that, I bought a subscription to Wine Spectator … but Jesus … that’s like moving to Santa Barbara or Bridgehampton; I’m not that old. Come on, Court! Now I’m not into wine porn at all.”

On being drunk, and boyfriends: “I can count on my fingers and toes how much I’ve been drunk — and that’s always from tequila. If you see me with my top off, blame tequila. I’ve also only had four boyfriends.”

[Via Grub Street]

Gwyneth has a history of telling fat people that they’re horribly and grotesquely fat and she’s disappointed in how FAT they are, like it’s a personal affront to her sense of decency and thinness. I think Gwyneth goes on a juice cleanse every time she chances upon a fat person. Meaning that she’s always cleansing, because people are just so FAT (in Gwyneth’s mind). As for HOW Gwyneth told Courtney to lose weight – that was Goop being delicate, correct? Gwyneth looked Courtney up and down, sizing her up and said coldly, smugly, “You are your own advertisement, darling.” Here’s what kills me, though: I feel like Gwyneth coldly assessed Courtney and decided that the most-needed part of the “makeover” was weight loss. It’s not that Courtney is absolutely crazy, it’s not that Courtney is self-medicating with food, prescription drugs, alcohol, what have you. It’s not that Courtney looks – to put it delicately – like a 50-something junkie who never bathes. In Goop’s mind, the biggest problem was Courtney’s weight.

Here are some photos of Courtney at her art show:

Photos courtesy of WENN, C-Love’s Twitter.

It’s been nearly a year since we’ve had reason to ponder the miraculous continued existence of Courtney Love on Twitter. Honestly, I don’t know why she didn’t take being sued for defamation (for several tweets last year) as a sign that she should eschew all social networking platforms. Does Twitter help her sell records or concert tickets? Probably not, so Court needs to just stay away from Twitter because she is clearly not capable of censoring her own thought processes (or in most cases, even spelling them out correctly). But I guess Courtney’s big mouth would still get in trouble anyway without the help of the internet because — just in the past few months — she’s still managed to attack the Muppets, hilariously claim to be Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety coach, and to blame her benzos addiction on Winona Ryder and Andy Dick.

So when this story about Courtney’s latest round of Twitter ranting popped up, my initial response was “Shut up, Courtney.” Apparently a few nights ago, Court got the bright idea that 43-year-old Dave Grohl (formerly the drummer of Kurt Cobain’s Nirvana) was trying to seduce (i.e., “macking on“) her estranged daughter, Frances Bean Cobain. This conclusion was based upon Courtney speaking with the voices in her head Frances’ roommate, who supposedly knows Dave’s driver and said that Frances was in the car with Dave and he was massively groping her. The entire Twitter rant is screencapped at Gawker, but I won’t replicate it here because it’s full of profanity. There are several reasons why — not the least of which is that Frances seems to prefer the exclusive company of her boyfriend, Isaiah Silva — it makes no sense why Frances would ever be in Dave’s car, but common sense matters very little to Courtney Love:

Courtney Love has accused Dave Grohl of attempting to seduce her 19-year-old daughter, Frances Bean Cobain.

The Hole singer, who is estranged from her only child, made the accusations on her private Twitter account last night. She claims that her daughter’s roommate told her that the Foo Fighters frontman – who is known as one of the nicest men in rock – “hit on Frances,” according to Gawker.

Grohl,43, is, for the uninitiated, the former Nirvana bandmate and best friend of Frances’ father, Kurt Cobain. He has therefore known her since she was a baby.

Grohl responded to Love’s accusations in a statement, he said: “Unfortunately Courtney is on another hateful Twitter rant. These new accusations are upsetting, offensive and absolutely untrue.”

After the initial incredible allegation, Love went on to threaten a Twitter account she obviously believed belonged to Grohl, although it is actually linked to a German IT worker who hasn’t tweeted since 2008, according to the website.

She talked about Grohl’s “pathology,” insisting that Foo Fighters drummer Taylor Hawkins resembles Cobain and is in the “submissive drummer position” in his hugely successful band. It has to be noted that Hawkins actually looks more like Grohl, albeit with Kurt-coloured straw blonde hair.

She also argued that the fact Grohl called one of his daughters Violet is salient, as a Hole song shares the same name. However, his eldest child, who turns six on Sunday, was named after Grohl’s maternal grandmother, as he’s stated in many interviews. The happily married rocker also has daughter Harper, who turns three next week, by his wife of nine years, Jordyn Blum.

He is one of the most beloved artists in the world, and unusually for a rock star, all the tales about him relate to his generous and moral character.

Unencumbered by actual facts, however, Courtney also accused Grohl of being “sexually obsessed” with Kurt then relayed information from a driver who claimed that Grohl had “his hands all over” Frances in his car. She also insisted that the Ohio born star, who grew up in a suburb of Washington D.C, has tried to seduce Courtney herself in the past.

This is far from the first time Love has attacked Grohl. Last November, the singer started ranting about him taking food from her child’s table at a festival in Brazil after a fan flashed a poster of Cobain in the audience. It’s alleged the pair have clashed over Nirvana copyright issues, yet Grohl has kept his counsel about Love and his friend.

[From Daily Mail]

Naturally, Dave’s publicist has denied the veracity of Courtney’s claims, and I’m pretty sure that Courtney must have imagined this so-called “conversation” with Frances’ roommate. Wouldn’t you think that a precondition to being friends with or even living with Frances would be to never have contact with her mother, who lost custody of Frances in 2009? In the aftermath of Frances’ freedom from Courtney, we also learned how Francis’ cat died and and her dog was nearly lost as well because of Court’s hoarding and pill-gobbling issues. So my initial statement still stands — shut up, Courtney.

Even though I don’t think anyone ever believes anything Courtney says at this point, this story is pretty horrible. I hope Frances ignores it, and I hope Dave sues Courtney for defamation. He’s been married to wife Jordyn Blum for nine years, and they have two children together. Dave doesn’t need this kind of crap from Courtney Love.

UPDATE: Gawker now has an response from Frances on the situation: “While I’m generally silent on the affairs of my biological mother, her recent tirade has taken a gross turn. I have never been approached by Dave Grohl in more than a platonic way. I’m in a monogamous relationship and very happy. Twitter should ban my mother.”

Courtney Love is pictured at the Salvatore Ferragamo’s fragrance launch on 3/20/12; Frances and Isaiah are pictured on 4/17/10; Dave Grohl pictured with family on 7/17/11 and with Jordyn Blum at the Elton John Oscar party on 2/26/12. Photos courtesy of WENN

This is an adorable and highly inspiring story. In recent days, we’ve collectively surveyed the ills of plastic surgery topics ranging from fillers (Ashley Judd), Botox and lifts (Cindy Crawford), and plastic surgery in general (Emmanuelle Beart). Now Miss Piggy (of Muppets fame) has decided to open up a bit on Anderson Cooper’s talk show and discuss her own Botox addiction. What follows is a harrowing (and somewhat heartening) account of one pig’s dependence on a certain cosmetic-enhancing toxin:

Miss Piggy first appeared on The Muppets in 1974, since then the buxom blonde has barely aged a day and remained a youthful piglet with a spring in her trotters, and now RadarOnline.com can reveal her age-defying secret.

“I have at one time said I am 99 percent Botox but that might be underestimating,” Kermit the Frog’s main squeeze revealed to Anderson Cooper on Thursday’s episode of his talk show.

Her fellow guest on the show, CNN’s Dr. Sanjay Gupta pointed out that the pink pint-sized star did boast a very immobile look, “That forehead doesn’t move at all does it?” he asked.

“No it doesn’t. There’s hardly a single expression I can make on this face,” confessed the actress and singer, who exuded glamour in a gold dress, pearls and long black gloves.

A concerned Cooper asked Gupta if so many injectables were safe from “a medical standpoint?”

“First of all Miss Piggy, you look beautiful,” gushed Dr. Gupta. “You need absolutely no work whatsoever. I do think it is possible to go overboard when it comes to plastic surgery or even Botox.

“Botox is something that can be safe but one of the potential concerns if you use too much of it you can actually make your eyelids droop, you can cause headaches, you can cause other problems. Luckily it’s temporary. She looks great though,” he added.

Miss Piggy, also known as Piggy Lee, looked flattered by the compliment, although it was hard to tell her frozen face if she was smiling or not. While she has not admitted to ever having more invasive surgery, The Muppets star has been rumored to have had her snout softened with rhinoplasty, her ears pinned back, pig cheek implants and fillers.

The full interview airs on the new episode of Anderson on Thursday, March 15.

[From Radar]

Isn’t it refreshing that at least one aging Hollywood starlet can admit her dependence on Botox and will also candidly point out its ill effects? Miss Piggy might not be a role model to many, but she deserves a lot of credit for coming clean on the cause of her (clearly) immobile face. I can only hope that, one day in the near future, she can kick this nasty habit. By the way, here’s a video clip of Miss Piggy’s appearance on The Coop’s show:

In somewhat Muppet-related news, TMZ reports that Courtney Love has accused The Muppets movie of “rape.” Yes, she is perfectly serious and obviously doesn’t realize the gravity of her own words:

Courtney Love believes Kermit the Frog and his gang of Muppet friends “raped” the memory of her late husband Kurt Cobain — by bastardizing Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” in their 2011 movie … without her permission.

Courtney says she has the absolute power to approve or nix the use of Kurt’s music for commercial purposes, and she never gave the OK for the 2 companies to use the song for the 2011 Muppets movie.

But there’s another side to this … We’re told Courtney sold off half of her rights to Kurt’s music to a company called Primary Wave Music. And there’s more … Courtney also gave Primary Wave the exclusive right to distribute Nirvana’s entire catalog.

As far as “Smells Like Teen Spirit” goes … not only did Primary Wave approve the use in the Muppet’s movie, they got permission from the two surviving Nirvana members — Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic. And Dave is even in the movie.

[From TMZ]

Eh. Courtney has no room to complain on this issue since she’s already sold off the relevant sections of the Nirvana catalog, and I’m sure that Dave and Krist are well accustomed to dealing with her incoherent crap. Ultimately, I’m figuring that Courtney probably talked to TMZ, fired off several tweets about this latest perceived audacity, took a few benzos, and promptly fell asleep, never to remember anything of this incident.

Whatever the case, Miss Piggy should not feel at all slighted by Courtney’s complaints. Furthermore, she should probably lay off the Botox a little bit too. I’ve got a hunch that Kermie loves her just the way she is already.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Here’s a photo of Courtney Love trashed out of her mind while exiting the Chateau Marmont on 1/13 because she always keeps it classy. That’s just a precursor for this warning to brace yourselves, for there’s a new “tell all” book about Courtney (aptly titled Courtney Comes Clean) that has been penned by The Fix and is based upon a year’s worth of in-person, phone, and e-mail correspondence with Love, most of which she probably doesn’t even remember.

The book goes into depth about Courtney’s struggles with addiction, her issues with men, and more on the money troubles that we’ve heard so much about already. Below, I’ve included some excerpts wherein Courtney blames a lot of her own crap on other people, including such celebrities as Winona Ryder and Andy Dick, but the book also apparently includes call-outs aimed towards Tom Cruise, Sean Penn, Scarlett Johansson, Kirstie Alley, Harvey Weinstein, Madonna, Oliver Stone, Brett Ratner, and Clive Owen. What could she possibly have against Clive Owen? Obviously, Courtney has tried (and possibly succeeded) to smash with both Stone and Ratner, but Clive wouldn’t give her the time of day. Maybe that’s what she’s upset about, but who knows? Only Courtney, and she’s probably already forgotten. Here are those excerpts:

On her “sobriety”: “I think of myself as sober,” she says, although she admits that her daily regimen of pills wouldn’t pass muster at an AA meeting. “When you’re used to heroin and cocaine, a few pills doesn’t seem like the end of the world. As they say in AA, it’s about progress, not perfection. I mean, abstinence is a nice idea, but I don’t know if it’s right for everyone. Especially for someone who was nursed on a steady diet of Valium and Ritalin from the time I was seven, thanks to my fine mother. I don’t do street drugs anymore. My medications are all legally prescribed by prominent physicians. I’m entirely legal. But the truth is, I’ve never claimed to be anyone’s role model. I’m not Mother Theresa. All I’m trying to do is stay alive.”

On losing it at Pam Anderson’s roast: “That Roast wasn’t a great moment for me. I was doped and dazed, and had lipstick smeared all over my face. I may have even been drooling. But it was all Andy Dick’s fault. He handed me a fat pill right before the show and said, ‘Courtney, here, take this–it’s like Vicodin without the aspirin.’ Winona Ryder slipped me a similar pill a few years ago. I’m such an addict that I just swallowed them both, without asking what they were. So thanks to Andy Dick, I ended up getting addicted to benzos again, which went on to plague my life.”

She’s tight with Sam Lufti:
 Love has dismissed many loyal staffers in recent years, including Marie Walsh Dixon, a veteran associate who decamped to work for Frances Bean. Other employees are suing her for unpaid wages. In their place, she has turned increasingly to Sam “Osama” Lutfi, a 37-year-old sober coach who has played an increasingly prominent role in her day-to-day affairs. A swarthy Svengali who once allegedly worked as a private investigator, Lutfi first rose to prominence in 2007 while representing Britney Spears during her much-publicized breakdown. Lutfi insists he has no formal relationship with Love, whom he describes as a friend.

She’s not a Chelsea Handler fan: “I may not like what you stand for, but I do believe in sisterhood,” she [told] Handler, who had recently taken up with Love’s ex-boyfriend, hotelier Andre Balazs. “You don’t want to put gratitude in the hands of a man who doesn’t accept you for who you are and never, ever will…No one in New York City, not even Trump, is despised more! I’m here to serve! Get help and work on your addiction/trauma, Chelsea! The kids call what you’re doing fame-whoring. [Y]ou’re too dumb to get it! Yes I know he’s telling you to take the high road and I’m telling you to take the f&#@ing high road you low-life. GO 2 REHAB!”

Inspector Courtney on fraud: In 2008, Courtney complained to the press that various corrupt lawyers and accountants had cheated her out of $250 million. By 2010, the figure had ballooned to $1 billion. In her quest to unmask the alleged thefts, she engaged a “twitter army” of volunteers who took to the Internet and examined property records to track down suspicious leads. But while some of those volunteers have backed up her claims of fraud, her distractions and failure to pay her employees have stood in the way of real progress.

The crack really helped too: “The strange thing is, while the crack screwed me up in a lot of ways, it improved me in certain others. I’ve never been good with numbers, but when I was on crack I could do math really, really well. I became a f&#@king whiz at calculus.”

Oh wait, Courtney screwed herself: “Shortly after Kurt’s death, the lawyer who was representing me called and said, ‘Courtney, you have over $7 million coming to you, but you need to give me your Social Security number.’ [I couldn't] remember my Social Security Number, so I had to lie and make one up. My mother, saint that she is, had a million husbands. My brothers and sisters were adopted by one stepfather, then by another. Thank God I was emancipated when I was 15, but ever since then I’ve wandered through life wondering who the f&#$ I am: Courtney Michelle Rodriguez? Courtney Michelle Menelli? Courtney Love? Courtney Cobain? It’s like, I don’t even know my f&#@ing name! How am I expected to know my Social Security number?”

[From The Fix]

That part about the social security number is particularly interesting because it illustrates that Courtney has dug her own financial hole from the very moment that Kurt Cobain died, and if she’s hanging with Sam Lufti, Courtney is just begging to get ripped off in the future. Of course, Courtney probably thinks that Sam is just “misunderstood” just like she is, but I find it amusing that he is the one trying to downplay their relationship. When Sam Lufti doesn’t want to be professionally associated with you, well, you catch my drift.

The Fix also includes a lot of excerpts on its website about Francis Bean’s deposition that resulted in her emancipation from Courtney. Francis alleges that Courtney took drugs “for as long as I can remember” and often fell asleep while smoking, which lead to her nearly burning the house down on three separate occasions. Francis also claimed that her cat was killed by Courtney’s hoarding habit and that her dog died after ingesting some of Courtney’s pill stash. At one point, Francis also had to deal with talking her mother out of jumping from a balcony, and she grew understandably weary of listening to Courtney rage about fraud on a consistent basis. For us, it was exhausting just to read Courtney’s fraud-related rants on Twitter, but Francis was apparently dealing with a bunch of screaming and paranoia about it in real life. Poor Francis — thank goodness she got away from that mess of a mother.

Courtney Comes Clean is available for download here.

Here’s photos from Courtney with tweaked lips last July at a Valentino-associated museum launch party.

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News and WENN

We’ve heard that Courtney Love is being evicted from her $27,000 a month West Village townhouse after failing to pay rent for two months and allegedly wrecking the interior. (You read that right, there’s not an extra zero in there.) The home was restored by an interior designer and was featured in a 2009 issue of Elle Decor. (You can see a slideshow of the original design here. It’s bold contemporary I guess, and it’s not bad but I can see why she would want to soften it up.) Courtney’s landlord told Page Six that Courtney re-wallpapered and painted over several rooms, in violation of her lease which stipulated that the design remain intact. Courtney also set a curtain on fire in her master bedroom, allegedly from a candle. (crack pipe.)

XOJane has a glowing report on how lovely and homey Courtney’s squatter apartment is, after she let their staff use it as an office for a week. They have photos of most of the rooms, and it’s not as bad as I was expecting. The place isn’t trashed, basically. It’s a kind of chintzy eclectic hodgepodge, similar to what you might see at Anthropologie but not as well organized or thematically put together. It’s not my style but it’s not awful either. The best part is the dry erase board of Courtney’s goals, in which she writes that her goals for the next year are earning $25 million, starring in three movies, and earning an Oscar by 2013. She also has several photos of her late husband, Kurt Cobain, with their daughter, Frances Bean. Here’s XOJane’s blurb on Courtney’s townhouse:

You’ve probably been hearing a lot recently about our friend and xoJane Contributing-Editor Courtney Love from several media outlets. A lot of these stories mention Courtney’s West Village Townhouse. Courtney generously opened her home to us this past week to use as an off campus, sort of Pop-Up office. It’s been a cozy, creative laboratory — the vibes here are undeniably GOOD vibes. Courtney said of her home, “listen, there’s no male energy here.” Which, for the record, Bryan and I had zero interest in taking issue with.

We wanted to share with you what’s it been like, so Courtney and I invite you to join us in a photo tour, so you too can experience rooms that immediately put you in a good mood. Courtney’s super-famous-in-his-field realtor, Jared Seligman, declared Courtney’s home as “The epitome of equisite taste” and rattled off with glee “Majorelle, Ruhlman, Chippendale, Willow China, Tiffany China…” Does it look like she “wrecked the decor”? I think not… Hopefully these exclusive photos will help you feel like you’re right here with us.

[From XOJane]

For her part Courtney denies being behind on rent and she also claims that she got permission from the landlord to paint and wallpaper. “My rent is current, but the owner is now asking for the remaining two months upfront. Even though it’s not required, I’d happily pay that and another six months’ rent upfront if she would extend the lease for six months. I have repainted, but I asked permission, and used a painter approved by the owner.” How does this crackhead sound coherent all of a sudden? You know that her spokesperson wrote that and made it all up.

The living room in 2009, Elle Decor.

The living room in 2011, Courtney Love.

Other side of the living room (shows same perspective as Elle Decor) 2011, Courtney Love.

Courtney is shown at Trinity College’s in Dublin, Ireland where she received an Honorary Patronage from their Philosophical Society on 10-18-11. Credit: Fame and WENN.com

These are some photos of Courtney Love in Dublin last month, where she gave a talk at Trinity College’s Philosophical Society and was awarded an Honorary Patronage. While I’m not sure why Courtney was awarded a Patronage, I assume that it has something to do with liquor? Nothing against the Irish, but they do love their alcohol:

And so the cycle continues. It’s things like this Honorary Patronage that allow Courtney to maintain many of her worldly illusions, including her belief that she’ll one day marry a titled nobleman and become Lady Love. In further delusionary news, Courtney has declared to Details magazine that she’s functioning as sobriety coach for Lindsay Lohan. This isn’t the first (or even the second) time that Courtney has taken it upon herself to declare herself a sobriety coach for an infinitely troubled celebrity trainwreck. She claimed to do so for Kelly Osbourne and Paris Hilton (as detailed below) and also purported to help Pete Doherty kick drugs too so that he could win Kate Moss back (and we all know how well that worked out). Why? Because Courtney sees herself as the “go-to-girl for the publicly humiliated.” That’s right, Courtney Love — advocate for the beleaguered, downtrodden, and drugged-up masses:

Courtney Love has claimed she is Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety coach.

Courtney has battled a high-profile addiction to drugs throughout her life. She is now clean and has decided to use her knowledge to help other people.

Lindsay’s life has been troubled lately, characterised by trips to rehab and prison sentences. She is now trying to get her life back on track and Courtney has decided to help her.

“I’ve taken up Lohan because nobody else will. She’s further down the line than I was, because there was no [gossip website] TMZ then,” she told Details magazine.

Courtney didn’t reveal any more details of her relationship with Lindsay, and the younger star has not yet commented on the report.

It’s not the first time Courtney has claimed she is helping Lindsay.

Earlier this year, the 47-year-old singer gave an interview in which she alleged she’d helped a number of young stars through addiction and legal problems. She insisted Lindsay once called her for advice after she was arrested, and even claimed she’d helped Kelly Osbourne after an alleged overdose.

“It wasn’t that long ago when Kim Stewart was screaming, ‘Courtney, what are we going to do? Kelly Osbourne is blue on the floor!’ Kelly wasn’t doing that well back then. For some reason, Kim Stewart also called me when Paris Hilton got pulled over for her last DUI. And Lindsay Lohan called me after she was arrested. The judge presiding over her case was the same judge who presided over mine. He was a very sweet man. I think he was an ex-alcoholic himself. I told Lindsay to just get it together and trust the judge, and Lindsay’s father called me for advice every day. I’m not even that friendly with these girls. What am I, a junkie Auntie Mame?”

[From Independent.ie]

As hilarious as the prospect of Lindsay seeking guidance from an equally cracked-out, washed-up mess sounds, I honestly doubt the veracity of this story. I mean, Courtney probably believes that it is true, but whatever. Courtney namedrops everyone. She’s worse than Gwyneth at the practice. In fact, Courtney is the only person who namedrops Gwyneth and not the other way around. To hear it Courtney’s way, every user of illegal drugs probably has her number on speed dial. Never mind that neither Kelly, Pete, nor Paris has ever acknowledged Courtney as their Patron Saint of Sobriety.

Seriously though, Courtney is a wreck in all areas of her life and has no business “coaching” anyone at anything. Even when she is allegedly sober, she comes off as being on some really good sh-t. In other words, the notion that Courtney being a sobriety coach for virtual hire would probably arrive as news even to Lindsay Lohan:

Photos courtesy of Fame and WENN

Here are some new photos of Courtney Love leaving The Groucho Club in London last night. Is she molting? She looks like she’s molting. MOLT. Sorry, I love that word and I so rarely get to use it. Anyway, remember how we talked about Courtney Love’s Vanity Fair interview (excerpts) last week? Well, my copy of VF came Tuesday, and that night, I curled up to read the whole magazine cover-to-cover, which is one of my favorite monthly rituals. I was enjoying all of the financial coverage (the article about municipal bonds and California’s financial crisis is especially good) when I came upon the Courtney piece. I began reading, and I had to put the magazine down after two minutes because Courtney was pissing me off so much. In the beginning of the piece, she’s going on and on about how she’s going to become “Lady Love” by finding some English nobleman to marry. The crazy bitch carries around a copy of Debrett’s Peerage and she’s actively trying to attach herself to someone rich and titled. She seriously thinks this is going to happen for her.

In other “Why is she still talking?” news, Courtney talked about the first time she and Kurt Cobain boned:

In the soon-to-be released book, “I Want My MTV: The Uncensored Story of the Music Video Revolution,” authors Craig Marks and Rob Tannenbaum, interviewed more than 400 people to rediscover the “golden age” of music videos made from 1981 to 1992.

In an except from the book, printed by New York magazine about the behind-the-scenes of Nirvana’s first video for “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” singer Courtney Love recalled the first time she and late husband, Kurt Cobain slept together.

“The first time Kurt and I slept together was at a Days Inn in Chicago,” she explained. “We were having our first post coital moment, and we’re watching MTV and the video [Smells Like Teen Spirit] came on. I pulled away from him, because it was his video, his moment, he was the king of the f**king world, and he put his arm around me and pulled me closer. Which was symbolic, like, ‘I’m letting you into my life.’ That really endeared him to me.”

The singer confessed the next time she saw the video with Kurt was at the Omni Northstar Hotel in Minneapolis.

“I’d flown there to f**k Billy Corgan, who still had lots of hair. I didn’t even know Nirvana were playing that night,” Courtney explained. “Kurt and I wound up at the Northstar, and our daughter, Frances, was basically made that night.”

Love and Cobain were married in Hawaii on February 24, 1992 and welcomed their daughter Frances Bean, on August 18th.

[From Huffington Post]

Seriously, who didn’t Courtney Love bone in those days? She slept with Kurt, Billy Corgan, Gavin Rossdale… didn’t she also do Trent Reznor? She probably did some of the dudes in Pearl Jam and Soundgarden too. Maybe she made her way through Alice in Chains as well. The way Courtney has been talking about Kurt recently (like, over the past year) has made me come to the late-to-the-party realization that Kurt was simply a weaker personality who allowed a stronger personality (Courtney) to dominate him. Weird.

Photos courtesy of WENN.