As we mentioned this morning, Nick Lachey finally proposed to his long-suffering girlfriend Vanessa. I made a crack about Jessica Simpson going on a tequila bender after hearing the news, and it looks like I was right. Shock. According to PopEater’s gossipy sources, Jessica Simpson isn’t doing too well with this whole “My ex-husband is marrying a beauty queen, and they have my money, y’all!” thing. Prepare yourself… I have the feeling that this report is only the first of many, many tabloid pieces analyzing how well Jessica is doing, and how she’s drinking more, and how she’s drunk dialing Nick, and how none of it matters because she HAS ERIC. Eric will play a large part in this. In fact, I can even see a competing engagement announcement. But first, PopEater’s report:

Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo’s engagement news on Thursday came as a surprise for everyone except ex-wife Jessica Simpson, who knew the day would come when the man she let get away would propose to another woman.

“Even though Jessica wants to be happy for Nick, this is a very difficult time for her,” a friend of Simpson’s tells me. “Nick was the love of her life then, man, and he was her first, so she will always have a very special place in her heart for him. She’s deeply saddened.”

The happy couple told Us Weekly that they were excited and incredibly happy about their engagement and look forward to a wonderful future together. Classy Nick got down on one knee and popped the question with an Asscher-cut diamond.

It was merely months after his ugly divorce from Jessica that Nick and Vanessa started dating in 2006, and although they briefly separated last summer, they got back together very quickly.

“Nick knows what it’s like to lose someone that you love and wasn’t going to let it happen again,” a friend of the crooner tells me. “He never thought he would ever get married again after Jessica broke his heart. He never thought he would ever allow himself to be vulnerable again, but after dating for a long time he trusts Vanessa and knows she’s the girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with.”

A Simpson insider tells me Jessica has yet to contact Nick to say congrats, and that it’s possible it may stay that way for a while, for fear she may not come off as sincere.

[From PopEater]

“…For fear she may not come off as sincere.” Ooh, I would love to hear that phone call. Drunky Simpson trying to be all coy and “over it” and then she just bursts into wailing tears and… God. Poor Jessica. CB just said that if she was in Jess’s position, she would probably be a mess too. Would I? They got divorced when… 2006? Yeah. I hope Jessica has moved on enough to not be such a mess. We’ll see.

For some strange reason, the tabloids are full of stories about Jake Gyllenhaal this week. None of the stories is all that scandalous or interesting, but put them all together and perhaps a picture will form. What is that picture? That Jake could be very, very upset about his breakup with Reese, and that everyone is trying to help him and set him up on dates and cheer him up and give him advice. That’s seriously the theme of these stories… which I find strange. Do I buy that Jake is the kind of guy who gets utterly devastated by a breakup and mopes around Hollywood parties getting advice from Sean Penn? Hmmm…

First up, In Touch claims that Jake’s Brothers costar and friend Tobey Maguire tried to set him up with a Reese Witherspoon-lookalike, only this girl had curly hair. Jake and the girl “seemed to hit it off on their first date… he was listening intently whenever she spoke.” One of Jake’s “friends” tells the mag that Jake is “lonely” and that he “wants a girlfriend.” Oh, he’s one of those guys. Those guys who don’t know how to function without a girlfriend or wife. Those guys are strange, in my opinion.

Meanwhile, Star Magazine reports that Reese and Jake are still talking, and might consider getting back together. Reese is “torn apart” since dumping Jake, and her kids are upset too. A friend tells Star: “Reese said Ava has been e-mailing Jake, asking him to come back. Reese says she realizes he’s more mature than she gave him credit for, and he won’t just walk away from her like Ryan did. That was her big concern.” And what about Jake? “His heart was broken… he said they should take a few months to figure out where they stand.”

And finally, both Star Magazine and the National Enquirer have stories about Jake and Sean Penn bonding or something. In Star’s version, Sean was introducing Jake to models at a party a few weeks ago, and Sean and Tobey Maguire acted as Jake’s “wingmen” because he was too shy to talk to the girls right away. This version seems totally… weird. The Enquirer’s version sounds a bit better though:

Bad boy Sean Penn is giving Jake dating advice!

Jake was moping his way through a party at Hollywood’s Chateau Marmont on January 9 when Penn stepped in.

“It was obvious Jake was upset. He wasn’t smiling or talking much, so Sean walked over to him, patted him on the back, and told him to be thankful he and Reese never got married,” an insider divulged. “Sean told Jake that marriage is overrated, and he should enjoy the single life because he has the rest of his life to be married.”

“Jake looked like he was taking Sean’s anti-marriage advice to heart. He smiled a lot more after their little chat.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, February 1, 2010]

Okay, how screwed up do you have to be to not only get advice from Sean Penn, but to actually take that advice? If Sean Penn told me to duck, I would jump up. If he told me to go right, I would go left. If he told me to zig, I would zag. So, my advice to Jake: either ignore Penn, or just do the opposite of whatever he told you. So… don’t enjoy the single life. Get married. And continue moping around.

Stand-up comic, published author and co-star of The Howard Stern radio show Artie Lange was quietly rushed to the hospital Sunday night. At that time, there was no further explanation and Stern remained tight-lipped about it on his show. But now, Page Six is reporting that the troubled comedian, who has a long history of drug and alcohol abuse, gambling addiction and depression, tried to commit suicide by cutting himself nine times.

Troubled comic Artie Lange landed in the hospital after stabbing himself nine times in an apparent suicide attempt, sources told The Post. Lange’s frantic mom called 911 Saturday morning after she entered his Hoboken apartment and found the bloodied funnyman, a law-enforcement source said. Lange sustained six “hesitation wounds” and three deep plunges. A source close to Lange’s management team confirmed that the Howard Stern sidekick stabbed himself, adding that his mother had come to visit him that day to drop off food. Surgeons managed to save Lange despite heavy bleeding. “We all have our demons,” Stern said on-air this week, referring to Lange’s past battles with addiction. “Artie has given this show tremendous moments of great comedy. He’s a tremendous contributor. He is a good man. Don’t forget how great he is.”

[From Page Six]

Lange is a textbook example of a “Crying on the inside” comedian. Love him or hate him, this is pretty darn sad. Stabbing yourself is a desperate act, indicative of someone at the end of their rope. Anyone who listens to the show knows that Artie has been in a bad way for quite some time, but hasn’t been ready to do the work needed to stay off drugs, treat his depression and take better care of himself. At least, not for more than a couple of weeks at a time. I hope he takes some time off and focuses on his mental and physical health.

Artie Lange outside the Ed Sullivan Theatre on August 24, 2009, and performing in Florida on January 16, 2009. Credit: WENN.

The first week in December, Alexa Ray Joel was hospitalized after she sort-of attempted suicide by taking an overdose of homeopathic pills. I say “sort-of” because I, and many others, think it was more a cry for help than a genuine suicide attempt, and Alexa Ray seemed physically fine after a brief hospitalization. After she got out of the hospital, her parents Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley stepped up in a big way to take care of their 24-year-old daughter. There were tabloid reports that she has been staying with either of them throughout the past month, and her parents are just trying to focus on making sure she’s getting healthy, emotionally and physically.

On New Year’s Eve Alexa sent out a message on her Facebook page thanking her friends, fans and family alike for their support throughout the past month. This is Alexa’s first public statement since the suicide attempt, and it kind of breaks my heart:

In the new year, Alexa Ray Joel plans to speak up about the “heartbreak-related depression” that contributed to her scary Dec. 5 incident — in which she was rushed to Manhattan’s St. Vincent’s Hospital after swallowing a handful of homeopathic pills. (The pills weren’t capable of killing her, but a panicked Joel called 911 to get checked out by doctors.)

The recovering 24 year-old musician posted a note on Facebook on New Year’s Eve to gratefully acknowledge her friends, fans and supporters. “I just wanted to thank you all for the incredible outpouring of love and support,” wrote Joel, the daughter of music legend Billy Joel and supermodel Christie Brinkley. “It’s certainly been a whirlwind of a month, but reading all of your encouraging posts has never failed to cheer me up!”

Noting “many new exciting developments” for 2010, Joel mentions “creative projects” plus volunteer work, including a new pet cause. The rock progeny says she wants “to help young girls with something I feel I know a GREAT deal about: Heartbreak-Related Depression. Although it does not get much attention in our society, it is a very serious and painful condition that often gets ‘swept under the carpet.’ I hope to bring this topic more to light”

At the time of her early December incident, Joel had been dealing with the end of a long-term relationship with former bandmate Jimmy Riot. Joel, a graduate of NYU, says she is extending her education to further examine her depression. “I’m even going back to school for Psychology in hopes to learn more about this and many other afflictions that many of us have had to face,” she says. “After all, there’s nothing more fascinating than the human mind and it’s respective conditions.”

In the Facebook note, the young woman also thanks her mother for a recent birthday celebration (she turned 24 on Dec. 29): ” Just want to send a quick shout-out to my beautiful Mother and all of her friends for the lovely “Birthday Tribute”… I was very moved by that, so thank you!!!!”

[From Us Weekly]

I feel for this girl, I really do. I think she just got overwhelmed with everything that was happening to her and around her, what with her split with her boyfriend, her parents’ public divorces, her own struggling music career, I can easily see and commiserate with how overwhelmed she felt. I’ve been there myself – not to the point of overdosing, but I went through a year when I had a bad breakup, an emotional breakdown and a series of devastating panic attacks that left me reassessing my life. I hope Alexa continues to get stronger and healthier, and I hope we see more of her this year!

Alexa Ray in New York on June 18, 2009 (credit: Fame) and August 15, 2009, credit: Belpanno/Fame.

It’s probably not a big shocker that singer Alanis Morissette suffers from bouts of depression. Her music and lyrics provide a pretty transparent window into her struggles, don’t they? Alanis addressed her problems with depression in a recent interview, and her methods of battling it might be a bit unorthodox: lots of running, lots of kale, and the occasional joint and glass of red wine.

Alanis Morissette struggled with depression her whole life, but recently, she found an effective antidote: running.

Morissette, 35, tells Runner’s World that “running has made being depressed impossible. If I’m going through something emotional and just go outside for a run, you can rest assured I’ll come back with clarity.”

The Grammy-winning singer, who has run two marathons, tries to live a healthy lifestyle, including eating lots of kale. But she still occasionally indulges “in red wine, and it’s fun to have medical marijuana once in a while,” she says. “I still party and include a little debauchery.”

Always an active athlete – Morissette says she was once a “hard core” swimmer who trained seven days a week – she sometimes struggles with the motivation to run. “But I tie my laces, put on a tight bra and get out there like a little robot. The first 10 minutes are excruciating, but soon I get into the flow.”

Morissette ran the two marathons for charity and did November’s New York City Marathon with Edward Norton on behalf of the Maasai Wilderness Conservation Trust. In October, she did the Bizz Johnson Trail Marathon through Lassen National Forest in California, representing the National Eating Disorders Association.

“I struggled with eating disorders, especially in my teens,” she says, “but I’ve noticed when I treat my body like an instrument instead of an ornament, my relationship with food completely changes.’

[From People]

I have a lot of admiration for runners. I’ve tried it, I hated it, so I stick with lower-impact forms of exercise like power walking or swimming. And of course, my favorite: napping. I have friends who rave about marathon training, but that kind of thing would definitely get in the way of my wine drinking/chocolate eating regimen. But from what Alanis says, perhaps you can train like a fiend and still carve out a little naughty time in your life. What I want to know is, how does one procure this medical marijuana for depression? I know that folks with glaucoma and even cancer patients can get it, but I never knew that people with clinical depression were able to. Can someone fill me in on this? Not for me, of course….for a friend. Anyway, it sounds like Alanis is in a really good place in her life these days. I know she was in hiding for a while there after her breakup with Ryan Reynolds, but she seems like she is way over him now.

Alanis Morissette at the Environmental Media Awards in LA on October 25, 2009. Credit: WENN.

Brooke Shields has been talking about her struggles with post-partum depression for years. Since 2005, to be exact. That’s when she published her memoir on the subject, Down Came the Rain: My Journey Through Postpartum Depression. The book could have just been an eye-opening, acclaimed first-person story that shined a light on a tricky subject that was (and perhaps still is) seen as shameful and stigmatized in our society. Unfortunately, the book and Brooke herself became center-stage as Tom Cruise and the Church of Scientology twisted the message of the book (“get help, go to a therapist, maybe go on anti-depressants, anything to get through a difficult time” basically) into their own anti-psychiatry, anti-medication message. Tom and Brooke fought about it publicly (“You’re so glib,” Tom told Matt Lauer when Lauer brought up Brooke’s book and message). Brooke and Tom eventually buried the hatchet, and Tom probably got Brooke some additional book sales in the end.

Anyway, Brooke is talking about PPD again, and this time she’s discussing how she came dangerously close to driving into a wall, she was so suicidal. It’s a powerful story:

Brooke Shields has been open about her struggles with post-partum depression, but in revealing new comments she expresses the true depths of her suffering.

Shields, 44, spoke movingly about the stigma of depression and her experience battling the disease on Monday while receiving an advocacy award from the Hope for Depression Research Foundation in Manhattan.

“We think and we feel that we should just be able to handle it on our own,” said the actress, who is mom to two girls, Rowan, 6, and Grier, 3. “I’ve always been strong enough to get through every single difficult situation in my life. I grew up in an addictive household. My mother [Teri] had acute alcoholism. It’s in my blood. I was never going to be the one to succumb to it.”

After a miscarriage and seven IVF attempts, she gave birth to daughter Rowan in 2003 with her husband, TV writer Chris Henchy. “I finally had a healthy beautiful baby girl and I couldn’t look at her,” she said of the depression she felt. “I couldn’t hold her and I couldn’t sing to her and I couldn’t smile at her … All I wanted to do was disappear and die.”

In her deepest moments of despair she said, that the disease led her to believe, “I should not exist. The baby would be better off without me. Life was never going to get better – so I better just go.”

Shields was prescribed medication, though she stopping taking it one point, thinking she didn’t need them. “That was the week I almost did not resist driving my car straight into a wall on the side of the freeway,” she told the crowd. “My baby was in the back seat and that even pissed me off because I thought she’s even ruining this for me. I just wanted to drive into the wall and my friend stayed on the phone with me and made me safely get home.”

She later called her doctor to ask for more help, and was eventually diagnosed with a chemical imbalance. “I learned what was going on inside my body and what was going on inside my brain,” she said. “I learned I wasn’t doing anything wrong to feel that way. That it was actually out of my control.”

Looking back, she said, “If I had been diagnosed with any other disease, I would have run to get help. I would have worn it like a badge … I didn’t at first – but finally I did fight. I survived.”

[From People]

This is one of the reasons I like Brooke – and I think her book and her interviews on the subject were eye-opening, and she made a lot of conversations happen. Do you think Xenu will allow Tom Cruise to let this one go by? I hope so. Tom seems to have learned his lesson, sort of, about telling (ordering) women to reject a psychiatric diagnosis of post-partum depression. I think the message finally got through to Tom – even if he truly believes that women shouldn’t get medical help for PPD, he definitely shouldn’t say it out loud.

Brook Shields attended the Hope for Depression Research Foundation annual seminar and luncheon in New York City, New York on November 16, 2009. Credit: Fame.

Aren’t these pictures cute? Sparkles Pattinson, Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner have taken their New Moon promotional duties to Paris for interviews and this photo call. Sparkles looks like he just woke up, doesn’t he? And his rat’s nest hair looks… deflated. Limp, if you will. I hate myself for saying this… but Sparkles looks better with big hair. I’ve gotten used to see his hair really, really high and looking like a rat’s nest, and seeing him so deflated is a bit disconcerting. Poor Sparkles. But doesn’t Kristen Stewart look gorgeous? I love that dress! She looks very ladylike and Sparkles probably busted something when he saw her. And by “busted something” I mean “he sparkled in his pants”.

Meanwhile, a new interview with Pattinson was just released in New Magazine. I don’t have the complete interview, only excerpts, and I just have to say… this kid needs a publicist. Badly. Because he’s starting to come across as some Megan Fox type, a guy how can’t shut up about all of his issues. Pattinson’s big revelation is that he’s “manic depressive”. I put that in quotes because he hasn’t really been diagnosed as a manic-depressive, he just thinks he is. Or he’s just saying he is. Either way, I kind of feel like slapping him.

Robert Pattinson has shocked his legions of female fans by uncovering his dark side – the actor suffers bouts of manic depression.

The Twilight hunk often endures mood swings and although he doesn’t have an official diagnosis, he’s convinced he suffers from the condition, also known as bipolar disorder.

Pattinson insists the problem, which is characterized by intense feelings of depression followed by swings of extreme happiness, often only shows itself when he is in a relationship.

He tells Britain’s New magazine, “You over-analyze everything – you analyze how if you say one thing, someone likes you, and if you say another, they don’t. You begin to experiment on people, which isn’t good for real life. I don’t think I’m very romantic any more – just manic depressive.”

[From New Magazine via Contact Music]

Now, here’s the thing. I could totally accept if Pattinson really was manic-depressive, if he had a real diagnosis. And it’s no laughing matter – true manic-depression is a very, very serious condition. And that’s just it – if Pattinson really was a manic depressive, I have doubts that he would be able to function. It sounds a lot like Megan Fox’s comment “I think I’m a borderline personality – or that I have bouts of mild schizophrenia.” I hate when these young celebrities throw around terms that don’t get.

On a lighter note, Sparkles also talked about how he’s dirty all the time. Gee, what a prince, right? Manic depression and he doesn’t shower or wash his clothes? Sign me up!

Robert Pattinson stinks. Literally.

The sought-after Twilight actor — romantically linked to Kristen Stewart, his face adorning the bedroom walls of millions of fans — warns would-be suitors to keep their distance or risk a certain aroma.

In an interview posted by UK’s New! magazine, Pattinson says that he rarely changes his clothes. “These jeans are a few days old,” he says. “But the top is probably fresh because it gets to the point where even I can’t stand the air around me. I don’t know, my personal hygiene – it’s so disgusting!” He explains that his constant travel schedule pares down his wardrobe quite a bit.

His career, if anything, has dampened his mojo: “Acting ruined my seduction techniques because you start to think everything is a ‘method.’”

Not that he isn’t still obsessed with women: “A lot of my ambitions are tied up with wanting pretty girls to like me,” he says. The self-deprecating Brit adds, “any girl I’ve ever really wanted to go out with in the past, I’ve always lost to someone else!”

[From Us Weekly]

Oh, for goodness sake. Take a valium and do some laundry. It’s not that f-cking difficult. And you know what? Sparkles has probably been living in hotels for months, and the hotels would easily wash his clothes for him! He’s so lazy, he won’t even call someone and have them pick up his stuff. Ugh.

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner are shown at the Crillon Hotel in Paris, for a New Moon photo call on November 10, 2009. Credit: Eliot Press @ Bauer-Griffin.

The tabloids this week are full of stories about Jessica Simpson being pathetic. I’m kind of over that story line, but I aim to please. What’s interesting is that both the National Enquirer and In Touch Weekly basically are reporting the same kind of thing – that Jessica is depressed, morose, and falling into a deep well of self-pity. In Touch’s story revolves around Jessica’s alleged lingering feelings for (or about) Tony Romo, who is now dating Texas beauty queen Candice Crawford. IT claims Romo and Crawford are now living together, and that “It opened up an old wound for Jessica.” Because Tony never really invited Jessica to move in with him, I think. Whatever.

The Enquirer’s story is slightly less pathetic. It’s all about Jessica feeling like a “failure” because she thought she would already be married and popping out babies by this time. So she’s turning to God for help. God and Twitter. And liquor. Here you go:

With her romantic life in tatters, her career stalled and the brutal mauling death of her dog Daisy, Jessica’s loved ones are concerned that stress and heartbreak have pushed her to the edge.

“Jessica is in the grips of a life crisis right now,” divulged a family friend, “She does a great job of publicly hiding the pain, but in private she is an emotional mess. She’s so lonely that she frequently sleeps at her folks’ Encino home. Nights are the worst. Sometimes she calls her mom into the guest bedroom and asks Tine to hold her while she falls asleep.”

“She is beating herself up over poor career choices, and feels as if she didn’t give her best effort to her two-year relationship with Tony Romo or her marriage to Nick Lachey.”

Searching for answers, she’s turned to another source for inspiration – religion.

On Oct. 23, Jessica posted this on Twitter: “Everyday I am challenged to be the best version of myself. Can I do it?Yes!! Gods plan for my life is bigger than me…so is yours..believe!” Then on November 3: “This full moon is beaming through my window with grace. I am falling asleep encountering this intense moonlit dream. Thank God it found me.”

Sadly, Jessica also seems to use drinking as a crutch, say sources.

“Her family has been keeping a close eye on her alcohol consumption,” disclosed the friend. “Jess sometimes goes overboard and then gets very emotional. They want to be there to nip it in the bud before it becomes a problem.”

Jessica also fears her 30th birthday, in nine months.

“Jess hopes she would have a husband, baby and flourishing acting career by the time she turned 30… Instead, she feels like her best days are behind her.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, November 16 2009]

Damn. I say let her get her drink on. She’s had a rough year, and I don’t think she’s really some huge drunk anyway. She seems like the kind of girl who would get drunk on one margarita, spend an hour dancing with Ken Paves, then need to go home and go to bed. Hell, I’d love to go out drinking with Jessica. I bet she’s a lot of fun.

Jessica Simpson is having the worst year ever, and now People Magazine, the Bible of What Celebrities’ Publicists Want You To Think, has actually written a story that makes her sound so… pathetic. First, let me say that I don’t think Jess is actually pathetic. I think she’s dumb. There’s a difference. And I do acknowledge that Jess has had one of the most craptastic years ever, from her very public weight gain, to the excessive media coverage of that weight gain; from her split with Tony Romo, to the crazy stories that came out after Tony dumped her; and everything else in between, some of it involving John Mayer, her dog Daisy being eaten by coyotes, and the failure of her country music career. There was a lot more, actually. Those are just some of the biggest crappy things to happen to Jess.

So People decided to do a story about how Jess might be in a “tailspin” and how, basically, Daisy’s death was the last straw for Jess’s fragile optimism and sanity. Daisy “gave her unconditional love” and “never betrayed her. Daisy was always there for her. This is serious. Jessica’s heart is broken.” I totally get that Jessica’s heart is broken with her dog’s death, but People is really laying it on thick:

After losing her beloved Maltipoo Daisy to a coyote attack, Jessica Simpson may be at the lowest point of her life, friends fear.

“Daisy was her baby,” one of them tells PEOPLE. “It’s going to put her into a tailspin. It will put her into the worst place ever.”

Daisy was snatched away by a coyote before Simpson’s very eyes in Los Angeles last week, and, despite Simpson’s refusal to quit searching and offer of a reward, no sign has been seen of the caramel-colored dog. She was given the dog by [her] then-husband Nick Lachey in 2004, and Jessica and Daisy became inseparable.

“She won’t leave her parents’ house,” a source says.

“Whenever things went wrong for Jessica, she reached for Daisy,” another source, a friend, says. “Daisy was her security blanket. When people let her down, she always had Daisy.”

On Sept. 19, her stylist pal Ken Paves convinced Simpson to finally leave her parents’ house. They went to Vino in Encino, Calif., for an attempt to perk her up.

“Jessica seemed okay, but wasn’t smiling much,” an onlooker says. “The wine made her relax a bit, but it was still obvious that she was having a devastating week.”

Daisy was perhaps one of the most pampered pets in Hollywood. Simpson fed Daisy steak, not dog food, and referred to herself as “Daisy’s Mommy.” When leaving the house, Simpson left on the air-conditioning for her dog; and when Daisy was sick, Simpson refused visitors so that they wouldn’t wake Daisy. She threw Daisy birthday parties, and when she talked about having a “girls’ night in” with a video, she was talking about herself and Daisy.

“Jessica has a very small inner circle,” the friend said. “But she always had Daisy. Daisy gave her unconditional love.”

And, unlike some of the men in her life, the friend added, “Daisy never betrayed her. Daisy was always there for her. This is serious. Jessica’s heart is broken.”

Whenever she was out at night, Simpson called home and had “someone put Daisy on the phone so she could say goodnight.”

“Daisy ran the household,” the friend said. “If Daisy didn’t like you, you were gone. Sometimes if her regular hair and makeup people weren’t available and Jessica had a sit-in, if Daisy didn’t like them, they wouldn’t be back. Daisy ran the roost.”

When Simpson was having relationship problems, “she would cry herself to sleep at night, using Daisy as a pillow.”

It won’t be easy to find a replacement, another friend said.

“Jessica is very needy. She is very clingy,” the friend said. “She is so sweet, but sometimes because of that she’s hard to be around. It’s not always easy. She hates to be alone. That’s what happened with [ex-boyfriend and Dallas Cowboys quarterback] Tony [Romo]. Jessica smothers people. She doesn’t really have any hobbies. Daisy was exactly what Jessica needed.”

Another source close to the actress dismisses the possibility of a tailspin as “silly,” but notes Simpson “did love (Daisy) like she was family.”

All of the sources agreed on one point: It’s been a tough year for Jessica Simpson.

“I want her to catch a break,” the first friend said.

[From People]

What kills me is that I bet this article started out as some puff piece, totally sympathetic to Jessica. When the writer started contacting Jess’s friends, they just went out of their way to make her sound like this total mess of a girl. Like the Calamity Jane of inter-personal (and inter-species) relationships. So… does Jess really “smother” people? Is she clingy and needy? Maybe. Once again, I don’t really think it’s an issue of being pathetic. I think she’s just not very bright. She should get another dog, and take up a hobby that isn’t too complicated. Like Solitaire.

Jessica Simpson is shown in the header on 9/3/09. She is also shown on 9/21/09 at LAX airport with Ken Paves (not shown). Credit: MATINGAS/bauergriffinonline.com

As I documented before, my feelings for Jessica Simpson walk that fine line between sympathy and outright pity. The girl is having a rough time after her now excessively-documented split with Tony Romo. Not only did Tony dump her the night before her birthday, he was hooking up with women on Jessica’s birthday. In the days since their split, Jessica has mostly been keeping a low profile. She cancelled her Ken-and-Barbie birthday party, and she’s been staying at her parents’ house. Over the weekend, she did have a “girls night” with her ladies, and she tweeted all about it, writing “Love my ladies!!! Wish I could be with them everyday of my life. Laughter is wonderful.” She also tweeted about watching Hope Floats, that crummy, depressing Sandra Bullock movie. I swear, if Jessica tweets about eating Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, she will officially need to get herself a muu-muu and some cats. She’s just ticking stuff off some kind of breakup checklist at this point.

Now there’s word coming from People that even Jessica’s family is “worried” about her. They “feel bad” for her because she doesn’t take breakups so well. Poor Jess:

Jessica Simpson’s recent estrogen-filled weekend hanging out with her girlfriends and watching chick flicks with her mom was a welcome bright spot in an otherwise difficult week for the newly single singer.

Since Tony Romo broke up with Simpson on the eve of her 29th birthday, “She’s a little depressed,” says a Simpson family friend.

“She takes breakups really badly,” adds another source close to Simpson. “She has a hard time letting go.”

The singer-actress has had a rocky romantic record, which includes her divorce from Nick Lachey and her on-again, off-again relationship with John Mayer. But Romo seemed an ideal fit for Simpson, who last year called the Dallas Cowboys quarterback “the love of my life.”

So far, Simpson has been coping with the split by living a low-key life and seeking solace with her parents, who “encourage her to go out and have a good time, like she did this week,” says the Simpson family friend.

But when she’s out in public, “she feels she’s being judged by the world and opts to hide out at home,” says the friend. “The family feels bad for Jessica. They worry for her a lot.”

That wasn’t always the case. “The family used to have such faith in [Jessica] and they worried about Ashlee,” says the family friend. “Now they are fully confident in Ashlee’s choices and they worry most of their days about Jessica. It seems she just can’t catch a break.”

[From People]

I mostly feel like “Leave this girl alone!” It hasn’t been that long, and Jessica is entitled to wallow in breakup sadness for a little while. She really loved Tony – and he turned out to be an epic douche. That being said, I really think Jessica is the kind of girl/woman who derives all of her confidence and self-worth from her relationships. When she’s not with someone, she goes into a tailspin of identity crisis and depression. When she has a boyfriend, she knows who she is, and she’s happy. My girl needs some therapy, I think.

Jessica Simpson is shown outside her trainer’s house on 7/21/09. Credit: MIV/Fame Pictures