In case anyone was holding out any hope for Amy Winehouse, the Sun has a pretty sad story of how she spent her time last night that will rid you of any remaining optimism. Amy’s not just back to drugs – she’s back to batshit crazy. Last night – when she was on God only knows what – she trashed a bar, headbutted a man, punched a Moroccan musician in the mouth, smoked drugs on the sidewalk outside the bar, and smashed her head into a lamppost. And of course, it was all caught by paparazzi. That’s one busy night. I don’t know about you, but it normally take me at least a year to get all those things done. And rarely do I physically attack more than one person a night, unless I’m really, really cranky.

The junkie singer, 24, is to be quizzed by police after claims she headbutted a Good Samaritan who hailed her a cab outside a bar. Rehab star Amy, said to have punched a second victim in the face, sank to a horrific new low while high on Class A drugs. Onlookers told how the married singer also snogged a mystery fella at a nightspot and shocked punters by overturning tables and drinks. She was later seen smoking drugs in the street, walked into a lamppost, and riled a cabbie by paying only half her promised fare home.

Another man tried to get her a cab, but she reportedly thought he was trying to molest her and allegedly butted him in the face. A source said: “He said she was a snarling tigress. It’s said she caused a serious amount of damage.” The alleged victim told cops yesterday. The star, whose husband Blake Fielder-Civil is in jail awaiting trial on trial-fixing allegations, promised the cabbie £40 to take her home. She persuaded him to stop en route so she could buy newspapers — but staggered into the lamppost, nearly smashing her head. On arriving home, she angered the driver by paying only £20.

[From the Sun]

Lest you think this was all embellished by the Sun (a valid concern, certainly), People has confirmed with the Metropolitan Police that they’re looking into the events of the night – and Winehouse may be arrested.

British police have confirmed to PEOPLE that they are investigating claims that Amy Winehouse attacked a man in a London street early Wednesday morning.

“Police are investigating an alleged assault on Chalk Farm Road at approximately 3:20 am on April 23,” says a Metropolitan Police spokesman. “A 38-year-old man [contacted] Kentish Town police station and alleged a 24-year-old woman had assaulted him. No arrests have been made as yet but inquiries continue.”

[From People]

Well that’s quite the eventful evening, even for Miss Winehouse. Perhaps it’s time she check herself into rehab, no? Or maybe jail? Can a person check herself into jail in the UK? I’m pretty sure the answer is no, but I’m equally sure if there were ever t time to make an exception, it’s right now. Amy is seriously close to spending the rest of her life in a locked mental ward. It is possible to do permanent damage with several different drugs – and something tells me Amy’s on them.

It might be time to re-evaluate the whole rehab idea. Obviously a person won’t be successful in rehab until they want to get better – but at this point, it might be worth it just to keep Winehouse from doing any more serious damage.

Here’s a few snaps from Amy’s night. She’s photographed holding another man’s hand, along with hugging lots of various strangers. Apparently she likes to attack and hug strangers off and on. Amy also got locked out of her house and had to break in through the garage at the end of the evening. Images thanks to WENN.

On Friday morning CNN journalist Richard Quest was arrested in Central Park with methamphetamine in his pocket. Quest is best known for his work on CNN’s late-night international programming and his hour-long show Quest. Originally it was reported that Quest was arrested for being in the park after it was closed… and while that’s technically true, it turns out there’s a lot more to the story than that. According to the New York Post, there was a good deal of kink going on when Quest was arrested – he had a rope around his neck that was also tied to his genitals.

CNN personality Richard Quest was busted in Central Park early yesterday with some drugs in his pocket, a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, and a sex toy in his boot, law-enforcement sources said. Quest, 46, was arrested at around 3:40 a.m. after a cop spotted him and another man inside the park near 64th Street, a police source said.

The criminal complaint against Quest said the park was closed at the time - something Quest should have known because of all the signs saying “Park Closed 1 a.m. to 6 a.m.” Quest was initially busted for loitering, the source said. Aside from the oddly configured rope, the search also turned up a sex toy inside of his boot, and a small bag of methamphetamine in his left jacket pocket.

It wasn’t immediately clear what the rope was for.

[From the New York Post]

I’m sure we can all guess a few things that the rope might have been for. How many of us have enjoyed playing Cowboys and Indians in the park? The rope was obviously for some kind of lasso. Or perhaps to wrangle wayward cattle. While I personally have never encountered any member of the bovine family in Central Park, it’s a pretty big place and you never know what animals you’ll stumble upon. It sounds to me like Richard Quest was just following the Boy Scout motto of always being prepared. Last time I checked the Boy Scouts didn’t include any mention of sex toys and meth, but times are changing and I could just be out of the loop.

The other man that was with Quest was given a summons for not having any identification on him. Quest was not charged with lewdness because he wasn’t exposing himself. So for any of you out-of-towners, it’s good to know that it’s perfectly legal to tie ropes around your genitals in public. But not having your I.D. on you might get you in a bit of trouble.

Quest spent most of Friday behind bars while his lawyer negotiated with the district attorney. He agreed to six months of drug counseling, and in return will have the charge dismissed upon successful completion of the drug program. Really, not a bad deal for hording meth and sex toys, when you think about it. If Quest had been caught doing the same thing in a Tad’s Steakhouse, he would have been given applause and a free dinner.

CNN reporter and business travel expert Richard Quest was arrested this morning by police in Central Park. He was originally detained for breaking the park’s curfew (it’s closed from 1 a.m. – 6 a.m.) at 3:40 in the morning. As he was being escorted out of the park by officers, he voluntarily told them that he had methamphetamine in his pocket. He was then arrested and was arraigned today on drug possession charges.

Richard Quest, a reporter and business travel specialist for CNN International, is being arraigned today on a misdemeanor charge of drug possession after the authorities said he was found with methamphetamine in Central Park.

The police noticed Mr. Quest at 64th Street and West Drive at about 3:40 a.m., the official said. As he was being escorted out, he volunteered, “I have meth in my pocket,” according to an official briefed on the case. The police searched him and recovered a small amount of methamphetamine in a Ziploc bag.

Mr. Quest is a high-profile correspondent for CNN International, known for feature reports and profiles. CNN calls Mr. Quest, who is British, one of the network’s “most instantly recognizable members.” He hosts “CNN Business Traveler” and a feature program titled “Quest” for the news network. CNN had no immediate comment.

[From the New York Times]

Richard Quest is definitely one of the more recognizable reporters on CNN. He’s known for his big grin and generally ebullient nature – and of course his distinctive British accent. He also was won the Funniest Newsman contest at Infohunks.

64th and West Drive is only five blocks up and about a block into the park from CNN’s headquarters at Columbus Circle. Quest must keep pretty odd hours due to the nature of his job – he reports for both CNN and CNN International. One can only wonder if he was working at the studio late at night and left for… well obvious reasons. Richard Quest always has so much energy on the air - I always attributed that to him being a real character, but now I’m starting to rethink a bit.

Petey boy sure is living the life now that he’s in jail where he belongs. According to the always reliable Sun, Pete is getting the star treatment at West London’s Wormwood Scrubs jail. Yes that really is the name of the facility. No it’s not a weird Harry Potter joke or something. I wasn’t impressed with the British legal system after they gave Doherty so many second chances. But it’s all okay now, because they have a jail named Wormwood Scrubs. We’re cool London, don’t worry.

Pete has been given TWO mattresses, extra bedding, a television, and a radio. Apparently that hasn’t helped his popularity with the other inmates – something Doherty might want to give a little more consideration to.

Prisoners normally have to spend weeks earning points for good behaviour before being handed such privileges. Doherty, 29, is in the segregation wing with 16 high-risk lags, including paedophiles. A source said: “He’s in the segregation unit because of who he is. It’s thought he could be vulnerable. He’s been put on enhanced privileges, which means he can have virtually what he wants, so that includes an extra mattress, TV and radio. It’s basically the five-star treatment, which takes most prisoners weeks of good behaviour to achieve.”

Babyshambles singer Doherty told a friend he was terrified of jail. His solicitor said: “Pete obviously didn’t want to go to prison but he was philosophical.”

[From The Sun]

As much as it’s fun to joke (Ooooh, two mattresses!) by the looks of Pete Doherty, I’m guessing his jail cell is a lot nicer than his home. Think about it; have you ever seen him looking anything less than totally dirty and disgusting? Now imagine what his domicile must look like. I highly doubt there’s even one mattress. Whoever thought going to jail would be a step up for Pete? Maybe he’ll consider his luxurious accommodations so inviting that he’ll choose to stay a bit longer – or better yet, move on to a five year, in-patient rehab program. I don’t think they have those, but if there’s ever a person to design one for, it’s Pete.

After approximately 1,283,374,934 arrests, trips to court, and overnight stints in jail, it appears the law may finally have caught up to Pete Doherty. Pete’s been ordered to serve 14 weeks in jail for a variety of offenses, most notably for violating his probation on a plethora of previous drug charges. This is pretty remarkable given that Doherty has somehow managed to evade pretty much every reasonable form of punishment and rehabilitation for years of drug offenses.

Troubled Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty was finally sent to jail today for breaking his probation order. He was taken from West London Magistrates’ Court and locked up for 14 weeks following a 30 minute hearing this afternoon. Doherty was jailed for ‘his breach of time keeping, non compliance of his order and using different drugs’, a spokesperson from the court confirmed.

Back in October, Judge Davinder Lachar cleared Doherty from the remainder of a drug control order but handed him his suspended jail sentence for drug and motoring offences. The 29-year-old was given a four-month custodial sentence, suspended for two years. On that occasion he handed an 18-month supervision order and a 12-month drug rehabilitation order. Lachar ordered he pay a £400 fine for an driving without insurance and a £75 fine for having no MOT certificate [similar to an emissions inspection in the US].

[From Metro]

Clearly getting clean is not a really big priority for Pete Doherty. And I wish I could say that 14 weeks in jail would probably change that, but let’s be realistic. Really, the only thing that will come of this is that the world will see you can only be arrested on various drug charges for six or seven years before you will spend several weeks in jail. So really, it will serve as quite the public deterrent. Actually what should serve as quite the public deterrent is any photo of Pete Doherty. That’s a hell of a lot scarier than jail time.

Here’s Pete and his sexiness at the Thames Magistrates Court in London on November 10, 2007. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Former ‘OC’ actress Mischa Barton, who hasn’t had much of a career since being killed off that show, is supposed to be entering a plea agreement for her DUI bust last year. Barton was stopped last December for suspicion of DUI and the cops also found marijuana on her. Because, why just drink and drive like all those other Hollywood starlets, when you can drink, get stoned and drive?

“O.C.” wanna been Mischa Barton has decided to take a plea bargain in her DUI case — clever girl that one.

A source tells TMZ that at her court date on Thursday she’ll plead no contest to the DUI charge. In exchange, the marijuana charge will be dropped and the driving without a license rap will be reduced to an infraction.

Greasy’s ex-GF will then have to serve three years of unsupervised probation, attend an alcohol education class and pay a fine.

A source tells us this is “fairly standard” for a first-time offender like Miss Mischa, who was arrested last December, adding that she’s “learned her lesson.

[From TMZ]

“Fairly standard,” my ass! Maybe it’s “fairly standard” for Hollywood starlets, but if Mischa had been driving anywhere else in the country, she would be wearing an orange jumpsuit right now. Which might be an improvement over her regular attire. This girl is absolutely useless in my opinion- a shitty actress, not all that pretty and a horrible dresser — and that was before I remembered she actually used to date Brandon Davis. And don’t even get me started on her last ex, Cisco “Bocce Balls” Adler. As for learning her lesson, my guess is that Mischa learned the following lesson: she is not famous or talented enough to turn a DUI bust into a career boost. If it didn’t work for Lohan, it definitely will not work for her.

Mischa Barton is shown after lunch at La Scala on 3/28/08 wearing shorts and a “Bite Butts” t-shirt, thanks to Splash News.

I’ve come up with a new rule: never write (or probably read) a story about Amy Winehouse while trying to eat lunch. The only thing worse than that is researching a story on Winehouse, because you’re bound to be accosted with a plethora of unsightly, stomach-churning images. Now I know the girl’s got issues, and I truly do feel badly for her, in a way I don’t for a lot of celebs. But that doesn’t mean I can look at the crusts on her face and still want to eat the crust on my sandwich. Amy’s still having her skin issues – and it was reported last week that she was using her some concoction involving her own urine to try to clear her skin. Interestingly, the other thing that works really well is washing your face. Also, showering more than once a fortnight can do wonders for the entire body. Since the invention of plumbing, people have been really big fans of it. Now Amy’s decided to add a little more crazy to her plate (I’m sticking with the lunchtime metaphors here). According to The Sun, Amy believes she’s being “tormented” by demons, and is going to move house for the third time in four months.

She is said to be tormented by “demons” in her new pad in Camden, North London. Though this hasn’t stopped her from letting in some late night guests… Wino wants to quit her home just a few weeks after moving in because she feels her surroundings have contributed to her disturbed state of mind.

A pal said of her latest pad: “She feels it is full of bad vibes and demons bringing her down.” The star quit Camden for Bow, East London, late last year to escape bad memories. Amy then collected more bad memories in Bow, where The Sun’s shock video of her smoking crack cocaine was filmed in January. She then went back to Camden, but believes the demons followed her.

Her face complaint [skin infection] has made her lock herself away, writing her darkest ever material. Maybe she should stay put in her current house and kick out the demons instead of moving – by stopping pumping them into her body.

[From the Sun]

Rarely do I find myself wholeheartedly shouting, “I agree with those logical people over at The Sun!” But today is that day, because holy crap are they right. Dear Amy Winehouse, the demons aren’t following you from house to house. You’re transporting them. The little hitchhikers are latched onto you so tightly you don’t even see them anymore. I really couldn’t help but wonder how a logical person could think it’s demons that are mucking everything up – and then I remembered that we’re dealing with an addict who likely is neither sober nor logical. So I guess Amy might really think there are actual demons following her – in which case, it’s time to head back to rehab. Actually it’s time to head back to rehab no matter what – and for a good long while this time. I know they say that for rehab to really work, the addict has to hit rock bottom and really WANT to be there. The problem is that Amy Winehouse’s rock bottom is a pretty terrifying place to be.

Here’s Amy coming out of her London home to go and visit her husband in prison today. She’s been wearing the leather gloves for the past few days, causing a lot of speculation about just what she may be hiding under there. Images thanks to Splash.

Canadian diva Celine Dion is mostly squeaky clean, but every now and then her wackiness shows. She sometimes has a habit of oversharing- about her sex life, about her body, and many other odd topics that surprise me. In a recent interview, Dion admitted that she and some friends tried some pot while in Amsterdam…but nothing happened. Celine, you’re supposed to hold it in!

Celine Dion has admitted she once tried marijuana - but quit smoking before she was caught by camera-wielding paparazzi.

The Canadian singer was visiting Amsterdam and decided to try the drug in a local cafe.

‘The only time I did one puff was in Holland, where it’s legal. And I went to a cafeteria with some girls, with the little boats and the canals and we stopped and I tried.’

But the 39-year-old insists the substance had no effect on her: ‘Nothing. No. But I didn’t choke. I took one puff and I said, ‘Okay, nothing happened!’ It was funny.

‘It was, for us, like cheating. ‘Oooh!’ You know, there might be paparazzi!”

[From Celebrity Stoners via The Daily Goss UK]

Poor Celine, somebody should have showed her how to inhale. But it sounds like she had fun anyway. I have a hard time believing people when they say that they’ve only tried it once, and it had no effect on them. The last time I tried it, I laughed for about 7 hours straight, then ate an entire bag of Funyuns. I’ve never been to Amsterdam, but I hear that there’s a lot more to the city than legal weed and canals. There’s also the Red Light district, where prostitution is legal. It definitely sounds like a great place to go for an “adults-only” vacation. I think I need to start saving my money now.

Celine Dion is shown performing in Brisbane, Australia on Sunday

Update: Photos removed at the request of the National Enquirer. You can see them in their latest issue with Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen’s feud on the cover. We are sorry to the Enquirer and thank them for being nice about asking us to remove them.

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“Jackass” star Steve O is in rehab after he was put into the hospital on a mental health observation for supposedly threatening to kill himself. It also came out that he has bipolar disorder, something that he admits on his myspace blog. Steve O also freely owes up to doing drugs, and there are photos out of him in this week’s Enquirer snorting coke off a woman’s leg. The accompanying story about how he was supposedly “hitting on random girls and asking to snort coke of their breasts” isn’t true though, he asserts, and he says the false claims are particularly damaging because he was engaged at the time:

The stories that are circulating right now about me being at some party hitting on random girls and asking to snort drugs from their breasts are not true at all. I will be the first to admit that I’ve snorted all kinds of drugs, in all sorts of situations, but I take offense to claims that I was running around hitting on random women at a time when I was under the impression that I was engaged to be married. I know many of you who are in receipt of this message from me work in the media, and I would greatly appreciate it if you would squash this dishonest journalism. These stories are so untrue, they place me at a party hitting on women when I was locked up in the looney bin. I’m a tough guy, with very thick skin, but that doesn’t mean I take kindly to being lied about, especially when it comes to behavior that took place after I asked someone to marry me and before I was informed, by the girl I asked to marry me, that she had completely changed her mind about getting married. Feel free to write whatever you want about me being rejected by my fiance, because that is true, but, please, don’t lie about me. I like to consider myself to be exciting
enough that dishonesty is not required to get a story out of me. Thanks, I love you all,
Steve-O

[From Steve O’s myspace]

This is the guy who stapled his balls to his legs, peed on the red carpet, smoked a bowl on the red carpet, ate roadkill, and generally comes off as an idiot of the highest order, but somehow I believe him and am rooting for him. At first I thought that Steve O’s girlfriend broke up with him after reading that National Enquirer article, but he blogged on March 20 that “she later expressed that she completely changed her mind about getting married. Now I am in recovery and do not have a significant other,” so it sounds like he’s just upset that the Enquirer made it seem like he was hitting on women when he was engaged at the time.

Steve O has been getting into all sorts of weird new age stuff (that seems to be a theme for today) and has been blogging about how he’s searching for more information about his higher power. He’s talked about The Age of Aquarius and told people to look up more information about the “Pleiadians,” which are said to be extraterrestrial beings which have visited earth. As long as he’s not sinking money into a cult, if it helps him to get sober that’s all that matters.

Steve O comes across as someone who is really trying to conquer his demons and figure out his place in the world. Maybe he’ll come up with a slightly less self-destructive way to make money once he’s out of rehab.

As much as we tried to stay optimistic about Amy Winehouse, it appears that she’s worse off than ever. The “skin infection” on her face no longer bears the one large roundish mark but is instead replaced with dozens of spots and scabs, including a nasty one near her lip. Amy also bears fresh cuts on her arms, leading most people to believe that she’s back to cutting again. The scabs on her face look like she’s been picking at them, and almost look worse for the concealer she’s used to try to mask them. Supposedly she’s still suffering from impetigo, though a lot of people think her terrible skin is a result of copious amounts of drug use.

After a harrowing visit to her husband in prison, no one would expect Amy Winehouse to be looking her best. But even by her own standards, the award-winning singer appeared to be in particularly desperate shape. Heavy make-up failed to conceal the spots and scabs on her wrinkled cheeks, chin and nose. There were also angry red welts on her arms, leading to fears that she has started self-harming again.

Miss Winehouse’s spokesman has insisted she is suffering from the bacterial skin infection impetigo - which is highly contagious and can develop by repetitive scratching of a sore. He said the 24-year-old has been put on a course of antibiotics to clear it up. But friends fear the scabs on her face are a sign that her drinking and drug taking is once again spiralling out of control. Her love of junk food has also not helped the condition of her skin. She was pictured emerging from a fast-food outlet with fish and chips and a bottle of Lucozade. A source said: “Her friends are worried these sores have been caused by an excessive use of crack cocaine, which can cause these kind of blemishes.” Pete Doherty used to have similar sores under his nose.

[From the Daily Mail]

When I was in London for six weeks, I found it nearly impossible to get a hold of any fruits or vegetables in restaurants. With the exception of ridiculous amounts of baked potatoes of course. But Amy Winehouse not eating a lot of fresh food doesn’t really come as a major surprise to me. The Daily Mail goes on to talk to a dermatologist who points out that whatever is going on inside the body shows on the skin. Any kind of imbalance – and certainly drug use – could show up there. It’s hard not to wonder how Amy can look in the mirror every morning and think her life is going well. She looks like she’s falling apart, and any health she gained during her brief trip to rehab seems to have left her a long time ago.

Here’s Amy stopping at a kebab shop after visiting her husband Blake in prison. Images thanks to WENN.