This news actually shocked me a little. Not that I didn’t fully expect LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian to get married – I did, and I bet LeAnn was dumb enough to do it without a prenup too. No, what shocked me is that they managed to get married without a lot of hoopla, on a Friday afternoon/evening, before a holiday, and one week before The Wedding of the Century (Prince William and Kate Middleton). It’s almost like… LeAnn was trying NOT to be a famewhore. Odd, right? Oh, well. Now the deed is done so I suppose we can start the official countdown for Eddie’s infidelity:

It’s official: Eddie Cibrian and LeAnn Rimes are husband and wife!

“LeAnn and Eddie were happily married today surrounded by their closest family and friends,” the bride’s spokesman, Rhett Usry, confirms exclusively to PEOPLE. “They thank everyone for their well wishes.”

Country star Rimes, 28, wore a Reem Acra gown as she and actor Cibrian, 37, exchanged personalized vows on Friday in front of about than 40 guests, including Cibrian’s sons Mason, 7, and Jake, 4, from his previous marriage.

The couple had led friends and family to believe that they’d been invited to an engagement party, but surprised the guests by tying the knot at the intimate ceremony held at a private home in California.

“I’m looking forward to settling down,” Rimes recently told PEOPLE of her impending nuptials. “Settling into our life.”

The couple got engaged in December when Cibrian proposed with a 5-carat diamond ring from jeweler Brent Polacheck, who also crafted their wedding bands.

[From People]

Well… congratulations to the couple. I guess. Sure. All I can think about is how awful she must have looked, a bag of bones and a pair of bolt-ons, sauntering down the aisle in a God-awful, tacky gown. I wonder if she’s going to sell the photos? People Magazine, you think?

By the way, a lot of people are talking about LeAnn’s new interview for this show, Great American Country. LeAnn played the victim card over and over again. Here’s some of what she said:

On her divorce from Dean Sheremet: “I know I didn’t do it the right way. I didn’t have the tools to know how to do it the right way, how to let go the right way. I’d never been taught that…I think I felt really abandoned – I think abandoned is a really good word – because of our divorce. Not only that, our divorce became so much bigger because it was so publicized.”

Learning from her mistakes by screwing Eddie: “I have the strength [now] but I didn’t at the time… So, it got really messy, but I have learned a lot from that. And I’m not glad it happened, but I know why it did.”

The “double standard” for country music men: “[Country music] has such a double standard. You know, Willie Nelson and Johnny Cash and all these guys. God knows what they did back in the day? And if a woman did it, you never were accepted or forgiven. But if it was a guy, it was just their life… It’s quite interesting to have to navigate those waters as a woman in this business.”

[Quotes via The Mail]

Ugh. I can’t even start with her. SHE felt abandoned? And she really thinks she’s like the most special, A-list superstar, doesn’t she? It’s even worse when you see the video:

Photos courtesy of WENN & Fame.

LeAnn Rimes tweeted the grossest thing yesterday. Seriously, don’t read this if you just ate lunch or you’re about to eat or if you ever want to eat again. LeAnn tweeted: “A good friend just told me that the key to a successful marriage was to argue naked! I’m gonna do that from now on, when that rarely happens.”

First, the grossness factor: LeAnn’s crazy, ridiculous, emaciated body. Can you imagine trying to have a fight about money (or Eddie’s mistresses) and having to see that body? When CB and I discuss LeAnn, just the two of us, my argument was always that Eddie had kind of crappy taste in women, and that he could only get hard for really trashy girls. But it’s reached the point where I have no idea how Eddie gets hard at all. I mean… ugh, no, I won’t go any further. Let me just say that this advice probably only works if you look like Sofia Vergara. Can you imagine arguing with a naked Sofia? That is HOT.

Second, the absurdity factor: I realize that LeAnn just put this little thing on her Twitter to be funny, but let’s face, she’s dumb enough to try it. So what “friend” told LeAnn this dumb strategy? Probably a “friend” named “Grandi Blanville.”

Third: “When that rarely happens.” LMAO. Girl, just wait. Eddie will come home, smelling of tequila and cherry-flavored lube, and IT WILL HAPPEN.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Bauer-Griffin.

It’s no secret to anyone with semi-functioning sight that LeAnn Rimes has been dropping weight. At first, when Eddie Cibrian finally left Brandi Glanville and immediately started up with his mistress/jumpoff LeAnn, LeAnn dropped some weight but overall she looked healthy and toned. And then came the engagement… and all of a sudden, it seemed like LeAnn began looking truly emaciated overnight (see an additional “too skinny” photo here). I figured it was a combination of things – stress of planning the wedding, the stress of being such a crazy famewhore, the constant surveillance on a man known for his wandering eye. But, according to In Touch, LeAnn’s emaciation has another purpose: it keeps her man happy!

With her wedding just a few months away, LeAnn Rimes went on a diet to slim down before the big day – but has she taken it too far?

Although LeAnn’s rep denies the story, according to a course, LeAnn is thinner than she’s been in years, and she’s still losing. The source reveals that LeAnn is a bundle of nerves over marrying Eddie Cibrian, and she’s dieting and working out more than ever before.

“LeAnn is determined to look her best,” the source says. “Eddie likes skinny girls, so LeAnn seems to be dieting to keep him interested.”

During a gathering in their Hidden Hills neighborhood, a witness says that LeAnn sipped water and avoided alcohol.

[From In Touch Weekly, print edition]

Does Eddie really like skinny girls? When I saw photos of Brandi when she was with Eddie, she was slender, but not super-skinny. She seemed to have a healthy figure. Same for the other girl, Scheana or whatever, that Eddie screwed while he was married to Brandi. And LeAnn had a healthy, slender figure when they first started cheating on their spouses. So… does Eddie really like bony chicks, or is that just what LeAnn is telling herself?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

*Sidenote before we start: I apologize for that Lindsay Lohan mix-up. I should have just gone to the gym quietly, but I honestly thought Lindsay’s court-date was today. My bad! Ugh, I feel so stupid.

Okay, on to the real story: Us Weekly reports that LeAnn Rimes & Eddie Cibrian’s reality show is a go. Now, this rumor about a reality show has been around for several months, some claiming that it will just be about the wedding, some claiming that it will be a Newlyweds-style reality show about their life together. LeAnn’s rep tells Us Weekly that the show “isn’t happening” but Us Weekly is still standing by their sources… and LeAnn hasn’t denied it herself, on Twitter. Which is significant! She never came right out and denied the boob job story either. Sounds like there’s something there:

Are LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian planning to star in their own version of Newlyweds? A source tells the new issue of Us Weekly (on stands now) that the singer, 28 — who once called reality stars “train wrecks” — is in negotiations to do a series about her upcoming nuptials to Cibiran, 37.

“The deal is nearly done,” says an insider.

The duo — who got engaged in December following a 2009 affair that ended her marriage to Dean Sheremet and his to Brandi Glanville — plan to tie the knot this spring at a private Montana estate. (Rimes has denied this is where the ceremony will occur.)

Though a rep for Rimes says the show “isn’t happening,” Glanville has high hopes for the proposed series.

“I hope they do a show,” she tells Us exclusively. “He needs a job.”

For more details on the couple’s spring wedding, as well as Glanville’s own reported reality deal, pick up the new issue of Us Weekly, on stands now.

[From Us Weekly]

Do you think Us Weekly’s only source is Brandi Glanville? Could be, or it could be Brandi plus someone at whatever network LeAnn and Eddie are negotiating with. Here’s a question: if the show happens, will Eddie and Brandi’s kids be allowed on the show? Isn’t that the kind of thing that Brandi would have to give her approval for? And you know LeAnn is going to want to show off her Mother Superior skills for the cameras. THAT should be the next big fight.

UPDATE: Okay, LeAnn tweeted her denial: “I don’t know how many times I have to say Eddie and I would never do a reality show about our lives.” Her rep went to People Magazine and said that Us Weekly’s report is “absolutely untrue” and “There has never been, nor are there, any plans for LeAnn and Eddie to do a reality show.” Now I want to know why Us Weekly is pushing this story so hard?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

These are new photos of Eddie Cibrian going into some kind of business meeting yesterday, in LA. I was going to make a big deal about Eddie being allowed to go places on his own, without LeAnn’s supervision, but as it turns out, LeAnn was around too, we just don’t have photos of her – you can see her here. Also, a few weeks ago, Eddie posted this video of LeAnn singing on his Twitter:

Here’s something I’ve noticed – ever since late January, when Us Weekly reported that LeAnn and Eddie had hired an “image consultant” to help them look less crazy and ridiculous, they actually have been keeping a somewhat lower profile. For a time, LeAnn’s Twitter account was “protected” and there were no more daily paparazzi photo-ops or anything. However, you can only keep the crazy subdued for so long – after going back and forth with her protected Twitter account, LeAnn’s tweets are back to being open to the public. You just can’t keep a good famehwhore down! Here are some highlights, just from within the last 24 hours:

@kntrygrl07 and btw, I’ve laughed at my own self when people make jokes about me when it’s not out of hate, but out of humor.

Why is it on the night we don’t have the boys we are in sweats, eating their frozen pizza and chicken nuggets and chillin?? LOL

@Cat_Expressions People go beyond hateful! Sad they must hate THEMSELVES that much to hate someone else

@amejean OBSESSED much?! Why even waste your time if you “hate” me that much! WOW, how much time I occupy in your life and space in your mind….THX

And of course, LeAnn defends Charlie Sheen, writing to follower Kntrygrl107, “since you haven’t diagnosed him you should stop the judgement. I’m not judging, but instead, having a little fun w/ what he HIMSELF has said. He might know EXACTLY what he is doing. You don’t know til you’ve walked in his shoes or are his doctor. Agreeing to disagree is fine with me. I’m not “making fun” of anyone, him or anyone with an actual mental illness. Please stop trying to make it look like I am.” Kntrygrl wrote on her Twitter feed, “she tore in2 me, deleted her ugliest tweets & blocked me all b/c I called her out on her “joke”. Immature & ugly.” Ah, the old LeAnn is back. Goin’ crazy on Twitter, picking fights, being ugly. I’ve missed it.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

In our story yesterday on the ways that LeAnn Rimes is taunting her would-be husband’s ex wife, Brandi Glanville, by trying to step in as a parent to Brandi’s children, commenter Missy pointed us again to this Twitpic account in which an anonymous tipster is pointing out the very obvious and blatant way that LeAnn is copying Brandi’s style. The last time I checked, the photos were just an identical pair of shoes on one occasaion and the same scarf on another, with LeAnn wearing the items shortly after Brandi was photographed in them. It goes beyond that on at least three separate instances to yet another pair of the same shoes in the same color and strikingly similar bikini styles. There’s no coincidence in how LeAnn apes Brandi. She even used the same plastic surgeon.

Anyway the latest on this narcissistic, stalking constantly tweeting creature is that she’s allegedly planning a destination wedding at a ranch in Nevada for May or June. I foresee LeAnn denying this story, just as she denied the engagement rumers, only to have a wedding matching those details with unneeded security to protect the photo rights for the paparazzi she hires. In one of LeAnn’s recent tweets she said she’s not sure if she’ll have a big wedding, and “It’s gone from many people to no one, back to just family…who knows! I just want us and simplicity.” And a camera crew, and Eddie’s kids there to pose for photos taunt Brandi with. I’m sure LeAnn will consult Eddie’s wedding photos with Brandi to make sure she gets a dress that’s spot on.

In news that will annoy Kaiser, LeAnn is trying to attach herself to talented British singer Adele. In response to a fan tweeting about a potential collaboration with Adele, LeAnn wrote: “@superhanrocks @eddiecibrian seeing her this week.”

Then Eddie tweeted a link to this video of LeAnn making one of her little pomeranian dog’s ears bleed with her singing. He wrote “Adele would be proud!” Substitute “amused” for proud and he could be correct. Adele is the toast of the town and is too smart to have anything to do with LeAnn. In LeAnn’s mind she’s on the tip of everyone’s tongue including “Barbara” Streisand, her finance’s ex wife, all the kids in her fiance’s son’s class, and all of the top musicians and producers. She will keep on tweeting until her fingers bleed to convince us of that point.

Photos courtesy of Fame & WENN.

On Friday, after singing at the school of her fiance Eddie Cibrian’s seven year-old son, Mason, LeAnn Rimes unprotected her Twitter account so she could gloat about it. Mason’s mom Brandi Glanville told LeAnn on twitter last Tuesday that it was “highly inappropriate” for her to sing at school on family week and that “it isn’t ur place… You are not his parent.” LeAnn of course didn’t heed Brandi’s warning and went on to do it anyway, after which she tweeted about it, noting all the cute questions the kids asked her about her celebrity status. One of the first things she tweeted about after opening her account was a thank you letter she received from Barbra Streisand presumably. LeAnn performed at the tribute concert to Barbra a little over a week ago.

Note that is is an extremely small sample, like less than 10%, of the tweets that LeAnn has made in the past few days. I had to look through pages and pages of inane chatter to find these.

Think I’m going to unblock my tweets. I can’t keep up with my sweet fans who want to follow and would love to (cont) http://tl.gd/8tvb0c
5:45 PM Feb 18th via TwitLonger Beta

Received a thank you note from Barbara today. It’s so incredible to get a letter from your idol. Just to know (cont) http://tl.gd/8u0321
Fri Feb 18 2011 20:36:47 (Eastern Standard Time) via TwitLonger Beta

@diaryofadivamom Happy to hear that! Stepmom’s are mother’s too and beautiful caretakers that deserve thanks and praise
3:26 PM Feb 19th via web in reply to diaryofadivamom

@amejean On Friday, a little girl blurted out “when you get married how many kids are you gonna have!” plant for US Weekly maybe?! Lol

@Rosebud it was like all these kids read the rags weekly lol…moms, if you’re gonna read them throw them away after!!! Still so innocent
11:22 PM Feb 19th via Twitter for iPhone in reply to Rosebud

@irishfern0302 it was just funny when one child asked who I was and the other was like DUH don’t you know!!!! Lol total attitude! Funny
11:24 PM Feb 19th via Twitter for iPhone in reply to irishfern0302

@amejean Come to my house and I’ll throw you one! I sang at @darrellbrown’s wedding!

@amejean I sang Some People IN TEARS for D and R
about 6 hours ago via web in reply to amejean

For that last tweet, I thought that LeAnn was saying that people were crying at her performance at Eddie’s son’s school, but she was actually referring to a wedding she sang at for music producer Darrell Brown, during which her performance supposedly brought people to tears. I wanted to cry just having to read through the insane amount of tweets she made to all the fans singing her praises.

As Kaiser said back when LeAnn joined the PTA at Mason’s school, I get why she wants to get involved with the boys and on some level it’s nice that she cares for them and wants to be there for them. She’s not their mother, though, and she has no respect for Brandi to the point where she’ll tweet about taking one of the boys to the emergency room before she’ll bother to call Brandi. All you have to do is read through LeAnn’s tweets (if you can stomach it) to see how much farther she takes it with those children and with her fans. There is something incredibly desperate about LeAnn, and the sheer amount of tweets she makes show how much she seeks validation for everything she does. She unlocked her twitter account because she wasn’t getting enough adoring tweets from fans, and that outweighed the inevitable criticism she gets for her narcissism. She needs constant praise like she needs to shove her relationship and personal business in our faces.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Compared to all the other ridiculous things LeAnn Rimes does, this latest story is kind of expected. In Touch is reporting that she’s turning into an anal retentive wedding planner for her upcoming nuptials to Eddie Cibrian. She has three gowns allegedly planned along with security and a bunch of probably insanely expensive details:

LeAnn Rimes has turned into a “Bridezilla.” An insider says everything she’s planning is “way over the top — even the security arrangements. What LeAnn doesn’t realize is that not that many people care.” Plus! She has three different gowns: One to walk down the aisle, one for dinner, and another to dance in.

[Details from In Touch via Jezebel]

If she didn’t do this I would be surprised. The good news is that LeAnn is marrying an out of work actor who is going to jump ship the minute the next one comes along. She’s going to run out of money at some point if she keeps spending like this, and she’s ruining her looks with plastic surgery, starvation, and bad dental work. If she were only a smidgen less self righteous I might actually feel sorry for her.

In related news about LeAnn, she is scheduled to sing in the class of one Eddie Cibrian’s sons on Friday. Eddie’s ex Brandi rarely tweets to LeAnn, but she told her to step off for this one. “@leannrimes It’s Mason’s week share his family with the class. it isn’t ur place.Let Eddie read a script. You are not his parent. RESPECT! @leannrimes I told Eddie to please tell you that I think it is highly inappropriate for you to sing in my sons class on Friday. Boundries!!” (Brandi also seemed to deny that she’s going to be on RHOBH, as is rumored.)

Along with muscling in on Brandi’s kids, LeAnn has copied Brandi’s style, down to buying the exact same scarf and shoes just a few days after Brandi was photographed with them, as documented in this Twitpic account. (Thanks Jezi for the tip)

Also, after Daisy424 commented on our Grammy recap post that LeAnn Rimes mouthed “f’ing bitch” after Miranda Lambert’s performance, I rewatched that part a few times. She did mouth something that definitely looked like “f’ing bitch” and she thought she was being stealth about it because she was kind of clenching her teeth. Given how big her teeth are now she might always look like that, though.

This is maybe one of the most hilarious stories ever regarding the LeAnn Rimes-Eddie Cibrian relationship/trainwreck. This even amuses me as much as hearing that LeAnn Rimes got her new boobs from Brandi Glanville’s plastic surgeon. Anyway, Us Weekly is reporting that Eddie Cibrian has hired an image consultant. And when I say “Eddie has hired” I mean “LeAnn hired”. It’s understood at this point, right? That LeAnn is supporting Eddie in every aspect, because if Eddie is using his own meager funds to hire an image consultant, you’ve got to wonder if that money might be better spent on his back child support. So Eddie hired this image consultant… because the haters just won’t let LeAnn and Eddie be happy and in love, and Eddie is tired of people thinking he’s a “philandering sleaze”.

Eddie Cibrian’s discovered that his bad boy rep doesn’t work on everyone.

The actor, who left wife of eight years Brandi Glanville, 38, in 2009 after Us uncovered his affair with LeAnn Rimes, 28, has hired an image consultant.

“He’s tired of being portrayed as a philandering sleaze,” a source tells the new issue of Us Weekly, on stands now.

First up? He made Eddie get rid of his Porsche and buy a Prius,” says the insider.

The consultant also told the newly-engaged star, 37, to be seen more with his and Glanville’s kids Mason, 7, and Jake, 3.

Says the source, “Instead of going to a Lakers game with his buddy, the consultant insisted he bring a son.”

(A Cibrian source denies the report.)

[From Us Weekly]

This image consultant doesn’t sound too bad, although these kinds of surface-level makeovers seem like common sense moves, in my opinion. Yeah, don’t drive a Porsche when your ex-wife is yelling about child support. Don’t look like you’re trolling for strange when you’re supposedly this stand-up guy who just fell in love. There are two more big changes that I’d like to suggest for Eddie, and it won’t even cost him a thing: first, Eddie needs to get a job. He looks like LeAnn’s kept man, and he looks bored. He needs to work. Secondly, and most importantly: get LeAnn to shut up. No tweeting, no interviews, no confirmations or denials by her rep, nothing. Just go dark for a while. Both of them should keep their heads down for a bit.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Eddie Cibrian’s ex, Brandi Glanville, has given interviews to both In Touch and Radar stating that Eddie’s child support payments have been cut in half recently due to his lack of employment. The current amount of support Eddie pays Brandi isn’t enough to cover her rent. Brandi even had to pay money back to Eddie for supposed overpayments he made in earlier months. The cut in child support payments came at the exact same time that Eddie ‘bought’ LeAnn Rimes an engagement ring worth $85,000. (Although LeAnn probably bought that ring for herself, or was somehow comped part of it, as E!’s Answer Bitch explains.) Eddie is also driving a new Porsche. Brandi told In Touch that Eddie didn’t even bother to give her, or their sons, the heads up that he was getting engaged to LeAnn, and they all had to find out about it through the press.

Here are some of Brandi’s comments to In Touch and Radar:

On how she found out about Eddie and LeAnn’s engagement
“They dropped the kids off with me, and it was all over the press – and the kids had no idea. How dare you not tell your children before you tell the whole world!”

On how Eddie told her that same day he was cutting child support
“I get an e-mail from Eddie saying not only am I halving what I’m giving you, but you have to pay me back the money I overpaid you for the last six months. And this was as he went to Cabo with the 5-carat rock on her hand.

On how current child support doesn’t cover rent
“What he’s paying me now doesn’t even cover my rent. Yet Eddie’s living this lavish lifestyle. He got a new Porsche, and he has an assistant and a full-time nanny”

On how he’s living the high life while their kids suffer
“I don’t want my kids to have it all on one side, and then they come to my house and I’m like, ‘We’re not getting a Happy Meal because I have to watch every penny I spend. He’s not thinking about our children.” – From In Touch

How she will have to move
“The lease is up on my current home and I will be looking for a new place to live shortly while also trying to take care of my sons.”

On her future
“I’m looking for work and trying to get my real estate license but it is a gradual process – I’m not saying Eddie is a bad guy and he is a great father but I just wish it all could be a lot easier.” – From Radar

[From In Touch, print edition, January 17, 2011 and Radar Online]

In Touch explained how Eddie was able to get away with this – Eddie and Brandi’s “divorce agreement states that if Eddie, 37, hasn’t worked in the previous six months, [Brandi] has to repay everything.” Doesn’t this sound like exactly what LeAnn would want? Eddie isn’t working, so he’s available for her 24/7 and owes half the amount of child support to his ex. LeAnn can set up a home for “her boys” that’s in drastic contrast to the lifestyle their mother will be able to afford, all the while transforming herself into a carbon copy of Brandi. If I were Brandi, I would have much more to say about this. Brandi has been incredibly civil about this ridiculous situation.

Radar has another new interview with Brandi in which she talks about her counseling session with Eddie and LeAnn. She’s very classy about everything and just says that the therapy didn’t go well, that she feels blamed by those two for no reason, and that “it is a process and that our sons have to come first.”

Brandi Glanville is shown on 10/11 and 8/13/10. Credit: WENN.com LeAnn and Eddie are shown on 1/2/11. Credit: BauerGriffin