Ha! I love how celebrities are totally shading Gwyneth Paltrow these days. If you missed my earlier post on Chloe Sevigny’s world-class shade on Goop, go here. Chloe was asked for her thoughts on Gwyneth’s petulant hissy fit about how “un-fun” the Met Gala was this year. And now Us Weekly’s print edition has an excellent story about WHY Gwyneth had such an awful time this year. It involves Madonna! Madonna and Gwyneth used to be friends until they had a falling out at some point a few years ago. Now they barely speak to each other, and Madonna goes out of her way to be a bitch to Goop.

The Material Girl is a Mean Girl! An insider tells Hot Stuff that Madonna went out of her way to make ex-friend Gwyneth Paltrow miserable at the May 6 Met Gala in NYC. Madonna gave Gwyneth the cold shoulder, then buddied up to tablemate – and current Paltrow pal – Beyonce.

“She chatted with Beyonce for most of the evening and didn’t even glance at Gwyneth,” says the source. “Everyone talked about it.”

The feud stems back to 2009, when Paltrow got fed up with the rude treatment from her onetime BFF.

“Madonna would sh-t on her, over and over,” says a Paltrow source. Years after Gwyneth dropped her, Madge is still hurt by the snub, says another insider: “She fels Gwyneth abandoned her. Now Madonna will do anything to make her suffer.”

And apparently she did. Days after the fashion bash, Paltrow told interviewers she would never attend again.

“It was so un-fun, I did not enjoy it at all.”

[From Us Weekly, print edition]

I don’t believe that Gwyneth dropped Madonna because Madonna “would sh-t on her over and over.” I mean, I believe Madonna can be an awful person and she always has to be “top dog” in her relationships, but who believes that Gwyneth isn’t perfectly capable of being just as nasty, judgmental and bitchy right back? No, I think they had a falling out over several things, especially Tracy Anderson and that whole situation. Gwyneth pretty much “stole” Tracy from Madonna and that’s the biggest untold gossip story.

But yeah, how funny is it to imagine Madonna spending all of her time with Gwyneth’s new BFF Beyonce? Goop must have been so peeved.

Hilariously, Gwyneth’s Goop-letter this week is her behind-the-scenes of the Met Gala and how she chose that awful pink Valentino, etc. You can read it here.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

A few weeks ago, Kanye West went on a tirade during one of his concerts, and his targets were many but included Grammys and the corporate nature of the music industry (even though this is the guy who is blind enough about his own role in the machine that he wore a $30,000 outfit to Occupy Wall Street). In addition, Kanye took aim at Justin Timberlake’s latest single, “Suit & Tie” by ranting, “I got love for Hov but I ain’t f–king with that ‘Suit & Tie’.” Then he went on to shout, “I hate business people. How much shampoo can you sell with your face on it and sh-t? Remind me again why we in this sh-t. Can you remind me again why we in this sh-t? Since when [is] making music about getting rich? Since when [is] making art about getting rich?… Remind me again why we in this sh-t. Remind me again why the Grammys couldn’t suck my d-ck.”

Kanye’s rant went largely unnoticed by the gossip world until Timberlake decided to use his performance time on this past weekend’s “SNL” episode to respond to Kanye. JT actually modified the lyrics “Suit & Tie” to suit his own purpose of dissing Kanye right back, and here is how he did it:

Justin Timberlake picked the perfect moment to slam Kanye West, who dissed his album’s lead single, “Suit & Tie,” during a February concert in London. During Timberlake’s live performance with Jay-Z on Saturday Night Live March 9, the singer changed the lyrics from “Aww, sh-t so sick, got a hit and picked up a habit” to “my hit’s so sick, got rappers acting dramatic.”

West, 35, trashed Timberlake’s track on stage at the Hammersmith Apollo. “I got love for Hov, but I ain’t f-cking with that ‘Suit & Tie,’” the outspoken rapper told the crowd during a three-minute rant about the commercialism of popular music.

The dis came as a surprise to fans, given that Kim Kardashian’s boyfriend frequently collaborates with Jay-Z. The hip-hop heavyweights even released a joint album, Watch the Throne, in August 2011. West was recently ranked No. 7 on MTV’s Hottest MCs list.

While West may not be a fan of “Suit & Tie,” former ‘N Sync member Lance Bass can’t get enough of Timberlake’s mid-tempo jam. “I think it’s something that no one expected him to do,” Bass told Us Weekly in January. “I think everyone was expecting him to do a crazy [dance track], but he went back to his roots and I like it. It’s very nice!”

[From Us Weekly]

I already included a video clip of JT’s performance of “Suit & Tie” on this morning’s “SNL” post, but here it is again. Since Kanye and Jay-Z are such close buddies, I wonder what Jay (as a performer in this video) thought of Justin’s modified lyrics.

You know, it would be one thing if he were merely criticizing the quality of “Suit & Tie,” which is a pretty atrocious song, but Kanye is merely (I think) criticizing what he perceives as the manufactured nature of the song. Never mind that Kanye has no problem with dating and knocking up Kim Kardashian, who is the ultimate commodity of reality television these days, but that’s beside the point I guess.

Photos courtesy of WENN

We’ve heard rumors that Ben Affleck’s wife, Jennifer Garner, and Matt Damon’s wife, Luciana Barroso, aren’t friendly. I think Lainey initially floated some of those theories, which seem totally plausible given what we know about the two women and the fact that we haven’t seen them together. In a recent Playboy interview, Matt Damon subtly threw shade at how paparazzi-friendly the Afflecks are, saying that people “are interested in [Garner] and how she parents.” What’s more is that Damon and his family moved into a mansion down the street from The Garner-Affleck compound in LA last summer. Affleck mentioned in an interview last fall that he’s over Damon’s house all the time, saying “I wonder if his wife is thinking, ‘Is he really going to come over every night?‘”

We’ve never heard about the two families hanging out together and they certainly could because they’re neighbors and they have daughters around the same age. Damon has daughters that are 6, 4 and 2 (along with a now teenaged daughter) and Affleck has daughters that are 7 and 4 along with an infant son. So you would think that the kids would be friends and everyone would be hanging out together but all we’ve heard about is Ben going over Matt’s house and bugging his wife.

That’s why I’m somewhat convinced by this story in the National Enquirer. They claim that Matt’s wife, Luciana, planned an elaborate destination vow renewal ceremony because she was annoyed and feeling competitive after Ben won the Oscar for Best Picture. I don’t think that part is true, but I believe that Lucy and Jen aren’t friends. We’ve already talked about Matt and Lucy’s vow renewal thing and I don’t think it bodes well for their marriage. If the Enquirer is right it may have not have come from a place of love and celebration or whatever:

Ben Affleck and Matt Damon may be best buds, but sources say their wives can’t stand each other!

“The two families socialize frequently,” an insider told The Enquirer.

“But despite Matt and Ben’s decades-long friendship, their wives have never warmed to each other.”

Tension reached a fever pitch after Ben, 40, won the Best Picture Oscar for his political thriller “Argo” with wife Jennifer Garner at his side on Feb. 24, sources say.

Just days later, Matt’s wife Luciana Barroso pushed him into announcing they’re planning a destination wedding in April – more than seven years after they tied the knot at City Hall in New York City.

“Luciana has always felt that Matt is more talented and way more deserving of recognition than Ben,” an insider told The Enquirer.

“It burned her up seeing Ben feted for months like he’s the King of Hollywood.”

So sources say green-eyed Luciana, 37, goaded Matt – who shares a Best Screenplay Oscar with Ben for the 1997 drama “Good Will Hunting” – into sending out “save the date” invites to their wedding.

“It was totally unnecessary, but Luciana wanted to stick it to Ben,” said the source.

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, March 18, 2013]

I doubt Luciana is as calculating as all that. She’s always struck me as an “organized mom” type who is happy to be behind the scenes, and who is grateful for her husband’s success. She doesn’t seem particularly conniving or competitive. She can dislike someone without being a scheming bitch.

It’s an an interesting theory though, and I have to admit that the timing is suspect for this vow renewal announcement, right after Ben won the Oscar. I don’t know, maybe it was also when things were calming down at home for Damon’s family. Although it’s not like Damon was at any awards ceremonies this year, and he certainly could have been. He won the Ben Screenwriting Oscar with Affleck 15 years ago and yet he didn’t go to the Oscars this year when Ben’s movie was up for Best Picture. That seems a little strange to me, but they’re dudes and it’s not like Damon is the type to go to an awards ceremony when he’s not nominated. Maybe he didn’t want to overshadow Ben. Plus their wives probably can’t stand each other. If Jen and Lucy were friendly I imagine it would be different.

Matt Damon and Luciana are shown on 12-4 and 12-6-12. Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner are shown on 2-24-13. Credit: WENN.com

Shia LaBeouf and Alec Baldwin’s bitchfight rages forth in a wonderful display of dual douchetasticness. To recap, both men were signed (along with Tom Sturridge) to star in an upcoming Broadway play, Orphans, but then Shia broke down (interestingly enough, before Alec) during early rehearsals and punched a backstage door before quitting the show. Then Shia decided to (for unknown reasons) apologize to Alec Baldwin, but he made the mistake of plagiarizing his apology and then posting it to Twitter for all to see. In response, Alec decided to take the high road by declaring to Shia “I don’t have an unkind word to say about you. You have my word.”

Well … that was before Shia started posting everyone’s personal conversations with him on the internet, and it turns out that Alec does have a few unkind things to say about Shia, but it’s not like Shia didn’t ask for it because Shia just couldn’t help but to stir things up even more by tweeting, “Theater caters not to the great but to the brash. acting is not for gentlemen, or bureaucratic-academics, what they do is antiart.”

Hmm. Where to start? Well, the great John Malkovich would beg to differ with his opinion: “A movie is like a line drawing, but a theater performance is like a painting.” Alec also has a few words to add (via Vulture) in regards to Shia’s summary dismissal of theater actors:

“I can tell you that, in all honesty, I don’t think he’s in a good position to be giving interpretations of what the theater is and what the theater isn’t. I mean, he was never in the theater. He came into a rehearsal room for six or seven days and, uh – you know, sometimes film actors – I mean, there are people who are film actors who have a great legacy in the theater. Some of the greatest movie stars had really serious theater careers and still do. And many film actors, though, who are purely film actors, they’re kind of like celebrity chefs, you know what I mean? You hand them the ingredients, and they whip it up, and they cook it, and they put it on a plate, and they want a round of applause. In the theater, we don’t just cook the food and serve it. You go out in the garden and you plant the seeds and you grow it. You know, it’s a really very, very long, slow, deliberate – it’s the opposite of film acting. It’s a much more intensive and kind of thoughtful process. And there are people who that’s just not their thing. So for those people who I think it’s not their thing, I’m not really interested in their opinion of it. But thanks.”

[From Vulture]

As much as it pains me to admit, Alec makes a great deal of sense in his assessment of Shia as a theater neophyte who knows not of what he speaks. In response to Alec’s response (this is getting good, right?), Shia has decided to upload screenshots of yet more email conversations. This time, he’s posting emails from Orphans director Daniel Sullivan that enthusiastically bestow praise Shia even before rehearsals began. And of course, Sullivan just had to say that Shia would probably be more prepared than Alec … because Shia was likely thought to be a great catch (his Broadway debut!) before everything fell apart. At this point, Shia just needs to shut his mouth. Nothing good can come of this, but if Shia disappears for a few months, perhaps everyone will forget about it.

Also Shia, stop posting private email conversations!

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

You know how Madonna, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are all in that Kabbalah cult, and how they used to be tight and do things like take trips to Israel together? Well not anymore. Demi and Ashton are of course over, and Madonna is very clearly taking sides. She’s not going to associate with the older party who has a penchant for dancing on tables and dating wildly inappropriate younger men. (Since she would never do that.) Madonna has decided to be friends with Ashton and not Demi, and made a very deliberate, obvious snub of Demi from her annual Oscar party. For background, Madonna and Demi co-hosted this same party in 2009. Fast forward four years and Demi isn’t even invited.

Demi Moore.. was snubbed by Madonna — who invited Demi’s soon-to-be ex-husband, Ashton Kutcher to her annual A-lister Oscar bash, rather than the actress — and RadarOnline.com has all the exclusive details.

“Madonna is firmly on side Ashton,” a source close to the situation tells Radar. “She adores him and thinks that out of him and Demi he’s the one with the glittering career. Also, Madonna loves having Ashton around as he’s great eye candy, he’s funny and he flirts outrageously with her — In Madonna’s eyes, there’s no competition – when it comes to picking sides Ashton is the obvious winner!”

Demi’s absence at the star-studded bash was the talk of the night, according to one party goer, who tells Radar everyone was shocked when they saw Ashton rather than Demi walk through the door.

“When Ashton walked in it got the crowd buzzing!” The eyewitness says. “Madonna’s never spoken about the split, but it’s obvious she’s sided with him over Demi. It was kind of shocking as Demi has even hosted the party with Madonna in the past, so it’s even more of a mega snub! Madonna clearly loves Ashton though, they were dancing together a lot throughout the night and flirting up a storm!”

Madge’s party, which she holds each Academy Awards night at her manager Guy Oseary‘s mansion, was THE place to be Sunday night if you are ANYONE in the Industry.

John Travolta, Bradley Cooper, Daniel Day Lewis, Channing Tatum, Anne Hathaway, Ryan Gosling & Eva Mendes, Jack Nicholson, Selena Gomez, Salma Hayek, George Clooney and Leonardo Dicaprio were among the hundreds of Hollywood heavyweights partying till the wee hours.

However, despite the mega-star power, Madonna was — as ever — the center of attention!

[From Radar Online]

So “hundreds” of people were invited, but not Demi, who used to be tight with Madonna. That’s got to sting.

Last year Demi was in rehab and couldn’t go, and Ashton brought his girlfriend of the month, who has long since been forgotten, so this year Madonna didn’t even bother to invite Demi. I guess I don’t blame her, Demi can be incredibly embarrassing. Just consider how she behaved at Art Basel.

Oh and Demi has a new boyfriend, of course she does, but almost no one picked up that story except Perez Hilton. He’s apparently a Spanish guy who was a contestant on Big Brother in Spain and his name is Piero Righetto.

Check out Madonna below. She wore this dress to the annual Kabbalah costume party, where her boy toy, Brahim Zaibat, accompanied her shirtless. (An earlier version of this story incorrectly stated that she wore this to her Oscar party. I wouldn’t put it past her, but apparently this getup was for a costume party.) She shared this on Instagram, where she’s been put on notice by the company for posting photos of her cleavage and ass. I wish I was kidding.

Ashton and Mila are shown courtside on 2-12-13. Demi is shown at Art Basel with Terry Richardson on 12-7-12. Credit: WENN.com. She’s also shown out shopping for vitamins (really!) on 2-11-13. Madonna is shown performing on 2-1-13. Credit: FameFlynet.

I was over at Reality Tea and I saw this interesting story about how Brandi Glanville recently tweeted that she was in talks to make her new book, Drinking & Tweeting, into a movie. Of course these would be preliminary talks, and if this deal moves forward it may be several months before it comes to the contract stage, but it sounds like a real possibility. Brandi’s book is doing incredibly well, and is currently number 1 on the eBook nonfiction NY Times bestseller list. This is something I was actually thinking about recently, because this is one of the best most detailed gossip stories to come around in ages. You guys know what happened, and imagine pitching this as a movie plot, it’s genius and it really happened. This is what Brandi tweeted:

Omg just had a talk about turning my book in2 a movie! Maybe we should pitch it to Lifetime An unromantic comedy! #pinchme

— Brandi Glanville (@BrandiGlanville) February 26, 2013

Of course we are starting to get Brandi and LeAnn burnout, we’re gossip junkies, but imagine the general population of casual and light gossip-consumers. This would be so interesting to them and they don’t know the whole story. (I mean LeAnn bought the same car, the same shoes on multiple occasions, the same bikini at least twice, jewelry, etc. and she mirrors Brandi’s every move. How many people outside of our gossip bubble know that?)

For the casual gossip consumers reading this, Brandi is referencing the Lifetime movie, Northern Lights, where her then-husband met his mistress, LeAnn Rimes. Although I haven’t read Brandi’s book yet, I heard that she details how her cheating husband, Eddie Cibrian, kept sleeping with her following his affair and begged her to take him back. LeAnn stalked Eddie, Brandi kicked him out, he went running into LeAnn’s copycat twig arms, and the rest is history. I’m telling you, this is a compelling story, all real and documented in the press and on Twitter. I was explaining it to someone recently and I could barely do it justice. You couldn’t make up this drama and now Brandi is cashing in. Yes she’s been pretty tasteless lately (did you see her Oscar dress?!), but that’s who she is and she’s making lemonade. She played nice for a long time too.

So who should play LeAnn in the movie? I’m thinking another singer, like Kellie Pickler. Sure Kellie is super nice, doesn’t look like LeAnn and has no acting skills that we know of, but this is probably going to end up on Lifetime anyway.

Also, why hasn’t LeAnn tried to sue Brandi over this book yet? Do you think that’s coming soon?

Brandi is shown at her book launch in Vegas on 2-22-13. Credit: DJDM/WENN.com

First of all, I want to praise Kelly Clarkson for absolutely killing it at the Grammys. She did a medley of Teneesee Waltz and Natural Woman that was just amazing. Also, Kelly won Best Pop Vocal Album, for Stronger, and her exuberant acceptance speech was so cute.

Kelly may be on top of the charts now but she’s had her trials and setbacks since shooting to fame as the first winner of Idol in 2002. She’s also had a longstanding feud with record producer Clive Davis, in which they’ve butted heads over the direction Kelly wanted to take with her music. Davis was CEO of Kelly’s label, RCA records, up until April, 2008. He then moved to head up Sony records. So Kelly worked under him for her first three CDs, up until 2007′s My December.

In his new memoir, Clive tells some stories about professional disagreements with Kelly, but Kelly wants us to know that he’s getting the details wrong. She also includes some additional information she claims Clive left out, in which it sounds like he demeaned and bullied her and did not give her credit for her successes. Kelly posted this on WhoSay:

So I just heard Clive Davis is releasing a memoir and spreading false information about me and my music. I refuse to be bullied and I just have to clear up his memory lapses and misinformation for myself and for my fans. It feels like a violation. Growing up is awesome because you learn you don’t have to cower to anyone – even Clive Davis.

First, he says I burst into “hysterical sobbing” in his office when he demanded Since You Been Gone be on my album. Not true at all. His stories and songs are mixed up. I did want more guitars added to the original demo and Clive did not. Max, Luke and I still fought for the bigger sound and we prevailed and I couldn’t be more proud of the life of that song. I resent him dampening that song in any way.

But, yes, I did cry in his office once. I cried after I played him a song I had written about my life called “Because Of You.” I cried because he hated it and told me verbatim that I was a “sh*tty writer who should be grateful for the gifts that he bestows upon me.” He continued on about how the song didn’t rhyme and how I should just shut up and sing. This was devastating coming from a man who I, as a young girl, considered a musical hero and was so honored to work with. But I continued to fight for the song and the label relented. And it became a worldwide hit. He didn’t include that in the book.

He also goes on to say My December wasn’t successful because I co-penned the album and it didn’t have “pop hits”. Well, first let me say, I’ve co-penned many of my “pop hits.” Secondly, My December went platinum (It sold 20,000 less than All I Ever Wanted which followed My December.) Hardly a huge failure. Never Again, the ONLY single they released in the US from that record was a Top 10 hit. I am very proud of that and I have my fans to thank. But, again, what’s most interesting about his story is what he leaves out: He doesn’t mention how he stood up in front of his company at a convention and belittled me and my music and completely sabotaged the entire project. It never had a chance to reach it’s full potential. My December was an album I needed to make for myself for many reasons and the fact that I was so completely disregarded and disrespected was so disheartening, there really aren’t words to explain….

Anyway, I love my job. I love my music. I love my fans. I love my label and all of my professional relationships… now. And I am grateful for Clive for teaching me to know the difference.

Cheers to another amazing year! And, as always, thanks for listening!

[From WhoSay]

Damn I love how she just smacks those stories down and makes her case bluntly. She is one tough cookie and she will stand up for herself and for her music. It really shows in her songs, and her industry and the marketplace have recognized that. Kelly is so talented and I love that she isn’t taking this laying down.

Update: Clive has responded to Kelly’s criticism of his book. He apologized but says his claims are accurate. He said, in part “I am truly very sorry that she has decided to take issue with what I know to be an accurate depiction of our time together. Before the book was published, I had every fact checked with five independent individuals who were present on a daily basis throughout it all.” You can read his whole statement here.

Kelly is shown on 12-5-12 and on 2-9-13, when she was the Grand Marshal at the Krewe Of Endymion Mardi Gras Parade. Credit: Pompo/FameFlynet

Over the weekend, I covered an Us Weekly story about Carrie Underwood and Taylor Swift and how much they dislike each other. I covered it because I believed it, because there was enough evidence (for me) showing that even if Carrie and Tay-Tay don’t have a full-on hate-on for each other, the two ladies probably don’t care for each other in general.

Yesterday, Carrie Underwood was asked about the Swifty-girlfight rumors by Gayle King over at CBS’s This Morning. When asked if she was feuding with Taylor, Carrie told Gayle, “No, not that I know of at least… I really like ‘I Knew You Were Trouble’. It sounded a lot different for her. I liked the branching out, trying some different sounds.” Which… that’s kind of passive-aggressive, right? It’s like saying, “I like that one song you do because it doesn’t sound exactly like all of the other cheesy crap you usually do.” Carrie also said, “In every magazine, in pretty much every newspaper or on gossip TV shows, they can just get away with it by saying ‘a source said’ or ‘an insider said.’ I’ve read the most ridiculous things about myself when people do that.” So, is the feud done? Not really.

What Taylor Swift doesn’t say in song, she says with her silence. The country crooner’s feud with Carrie Underwood made seating charts a nightmare for the Grammys staffers, a source tells Us Weekly.

“Such a headache!” the insider said of the last-minute scrambling. According to another source, however, the strategic separation of the two wasn’t just limited to the Staples Center auditorium on Sunday, Feb. 10.

Staff members also had to keep the pair “from crossing paths” on the red carpet and throughout the ceremony. But the root of the country contention isn’t coming from Swift, a friend of the singer insists.

“Taylor feels Carrie is always rude to her, so she steers clear of her,” the pal told Us. (A Grammy rep countered: “No requests were received from either artist.”)

A source close to Underwood, 29, similarly denies any feud, saying instead that the singer is just “shy.” The American Idol alum gave a rousing performance of her hit “Blown Away” during Sunday’s awards ceremony, but Swift didn’t seem too impressed.

“After Carrie performed, Taylor didn’t stand,” an eyewitness told Us. “Everyone else did.”

An energetic Swift was seen dancing and singing along to other performances throughout the night with her pal Claire Waterman, daughter of celeb jewelry designer Cathy Waterman.

To be fair, however, Swift, 23, may not have been paying too much mind to Underwood at the Grammys — she had other musicians to avoid as well. The singer, who opened the show with an explosive rendition of her hit “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” that took a dig at ex Harry Styles, also made sure to steer clear of John Mayer and his current girlfriend, a mint green-clad Katy Perry, 28.

Perry and Swift have previously been photographed smiling and happily posing together at events. Mayer, 35, and the “Dear John” singer briefly dated in 2010.

[From Us Weekly]

So… it sounds more like Tay-Tay has an ax to grind because Tay-Tay is basically a 13-year-old girl stuck in the bolt-on-y body of a 23 year old. Taylor didn’t stand for Carrie? That might sound like something that could be easily explained away, but you know it MEANT something for Taylor. I’m starting to think that this feud is one-sided, meaning that Taylor might really consider Carrie to be her nemesis. And while Carrie probably doesn’t care one way or another about Swifty, Carrie isn’t going to waste her time “snubbing” Swifty.

As for the John Mayer stuff… I can’t. He’s like a Douche Plague. I don’t blame Taylor for avoiding him. I suspect a lot of people avoided him at the Grammys.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

This is the funniest/dumbest C-list story to come out in a while. It involves Katie Price and Kelly Brook, two “celebrities” barely known outside of England. I suspect Kelly Brook is more well-known in America because she’s pretty and she has amazing boobs, so it’s best just to think of her as “England’s Original Kate Upton”. As for Katie Price… she’s a super-trashy reality star and “glamour model” who is famous for marrying a string of gay dudes and for having huge implants. And for being orange.

So… Katie Price started it. She told The Sun that she had recently seen some photos of Kelly Brook in a bikini, and that Kelly looked like she had gained weight after her breakup from Thom Evans. Except Katie wrote it in her particular way:

‘The pictures of Kelly modelling her latest New Look swimwear range in Miami don’t seem to be airbrushed and I’m FLABbergasted to see how big Kelly really is. You’re a heffer, Kelly, but still a hot one.’

‘Rumour has it she’s been hanging out with our mutual ex Danny Cipriani. Knowing him, I guess she’s probably been doing a bit of comfort eating.’

‘Kelly Brook is a brilliant role model for young girls because of her curvy figure. Every mum should make her daughter look at the recent set of pictures that show Kelly modelling her latest New Look range in Miami.’

[Via The Mail]

So, Katie called Kelly a “heffer” and then made an allusion to the rumor that Kelly is back to seeing Danny Cipriani, who Katie also dated briefly. After everyone freaked out, Katie tried to sort-of apologize, saying: “I don’t think girls read sun col right as I never slagged off bigger girls my sister is bigger and curvy women are sexy and men prefer that. I was saying she looks bigger than normal which she does but she is still stunning! if I put on weight people say I’m pregnant I cant win.” She also tweeted: “I love the fact people comment on my opinions! everyone has nasty opinions to say about me I havent said anything untrue just my observation.”

So what did Kelly do? She kept it classy. She tweeted: “I was really disappointed when I heard what had been said. It is unladylike as far as I’m concerned for another woman to say that sort of thing publicly about another woman… I wasn’t angry with what she said, just confused. I definitely don’t look like a heifer and it’s not something I am going to lose any sleep over. I was only angry because the comments put such a dampener on such an amazing trip to Miami to shoot my New Look campaign.” Well said, Kelly. You are not a “heffer” or a “heifer”. You have a lovely figure! An aspirational figure.

Anyway, some source claims Katie was just slamming Kelly because Katie is “very jealous that Kelly and Danny are now hanging out together all of the time. She really fancied him and hoped that things would work out but they didn’t, so you can imagine how she feels to see him and Kelly back together again.” So budget.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.

Man, I’d hate to have a feud with Anne Hathaway. Mostly because she’s sort of a goody-goody but also because I’ve seen Bride Wars, and it wasn’t pretty. Even though Anne’s currently riding high (and possibly already crafting speeches) in regard to her current Oscar race, Anne’s done some pretty low-quality movies in her time. Still and according to a story in this week’s Enquirer, Anne allegedly feels that she is above other actresses, and in particular, she’s taking aim at Katie Holmes. Actually, she’s sort of been doing so for a few years now with two “SNL” performances (one in 2010 and one just a few months ago). It does seem a little bit personal, doesn’t it? Apparently, Anne and Katie were up for a lot of the same jobs at one point, and that was probably the point when Katie was getting a lot of movie roles during “Dawson’s Creek” hiatuses, and Anne was struggling to break away from Disney’s Princess Diaries franchise. Now Anne is allegedly keeping the feud alive by continuing to badmouth what she views as inferior acting skills on the part of Katie. Here are the details:

The claws are out between the Batman babes after Anne Hathaway poked fun at Katie Holmes during a November appearance on “Saturday Night Live.”

During hilarious skits on the long-running late-night comedy show, Les Miserables star Anne skewered both Katie AND “Homeland” actress Claire Danes. And although she’s offiically offered a mea culpa to Claire — along with a bouquet of flowers — she’s conspicuously neglected to apologize to Tom Cruise’s ex-wife Katie.

“Anne and Katie are longtime rivals,” disclosed an insider. “Anne puts forth a very genial, friendly image, but she has a wicked competitive streak. She doesn’t like Katie because they used to go up for similar roles. Anne always felt lke Katie used her Hollywood connections through Tom to advance her career. And she constantly makes fun of Katie behind her back, mocking her former marriage and even her appearance.”

Anne also believes she outclassed Katie in their Batman movies. While she was lauded for her performance as Catwoman in The Dark Knight [Rises],” critics panned Katie, 34, for her role as the Caped Crusader’s love interest in Batman Begins.

“Simply put,” said the insider, “There is no love lost between Anne and Katie.” Anne, 30, hosted “SNL” for the third time on Nov. 10, and while she also spoofed Claire’s erratic character on the Showtime series “Homeland,” her mean-spirited mockery of Katie’s smile and mannerisms both infuriated and humiliated the actress.

And that was even Anne’s first roast of Katie — she also mimicked her during a 2010 “SNL” appearance! While Katie was good-natured the first time around, she’s apparently not laughing anymore. “It all comes down to the fact that Anne doesn’t take Katie seriously as an actress,” noted the insider. “And Katie’s gotten Anne’s message loud and clear.”

[From Enquirer, print edition, February 4, 2013]

I believe this story because Anne is very competitive about roles, and her mockery of Katie (twice) on “SNL” seemed intensely personal while Anne’s take on Claire Danes was really only based upon Claire’s “Homeland” character. Now I’m not saying that Katie is a good actress (because she isn’t) or that she doesn’t talk out of the corner of her mouth (because she does, all the time), but it does seem like Anne has a problem with Katie. The easy comparison of their respective takes on Batman roles only adds to the bad blood between the two.

The Enquirer also has a throwaway story based upon a tiny grain of truth; that is, Katie is likely devastated that her Broadway play, Dead Accounts closed two months early. Star says that, in the aftermath, Katie has decided to make a career change and go to law school, after which she’ll go into practice with her father, Martin (who was the mastermind behind Katie’s excellent prenup with Tom Cruise). This story is so silly. Katie has a ton of money rolling in with her fashion line, Bobbi Brown spokesperson duties, and a new co-owner/spokesperson gig with Alterna healthcare. She’s also producing a few movies right now. At this point, law school would be silly and unprofitable for Katie. Fake story.

Photos courtesy of WENN