It turns out that Kanye West is a much bigger man than we all thought. Remember his embarrassing tantrum after losing in all five categories for which he was nominated at the VMAs? Well it turns out that wasn’t the real problem – according to him. Britney opening up was sorta a problem, but the real problem? He was one of four singers performing in an “intimate performance suite” instead of on the main stage. The Foo Fighters, Fall Out Boy, and Justin Timberlake/Timbaland were also given performance suites, and we didn’t hear them screaming and hollering about it.

“Kanye West has revealed the real reason behind his angry incident at the MTV Video Music Awards on Sunday (September 9). For Sunday’s event, West was among four performers who were given intimate ‘performance suites’ at the Palm’s Casino Resort in Las Vegas. Fall Out Boy, Foo Fighters and duo Justin Timberlake and Timbaland were also given suites.

“MTV broadcast many performances from the suites throughout the ceremony, though West was upset at not being on the Main Stage explaining: ‘Everybody thinks I snapped from not winning, but there’s a lot of things that happen behind the scenes where you’re just not given a fair shake.’ Speaking on BET’s 106 & Park yesterday, West says he was ‘talked into’ performing at a suite. He recalled: ‘It was always my dream to open the award shows with “Stronger”, and they talked me into doing the suite thing. Then when they had Britney open, I said “How are you going to have Britney open? Because she’s not ready”.

[From NME]

Apparently Kanye was told the main stage didn’t look good – though it’s unclear why from his vague phrasing. It seems like he means people would all be seated instead of standing and cheering, and that wouldn’t look as good on television. So he was talked into the performance suites, which would have a more relaxed vibe or something.

“‘We’ve been touring across the world. Give it to the artists that deserve it, you know what I’m saying? I wouldn’t have been mad if they opened it with Fall Out Boy or if they opened it with Timbaland.’ West said when he pushed the issue, he was told that the Main Stage did not ‘look good’. ‘They told me, “That theatre stage, man, it don’t look good, you don’t want to perform on that, they’re gonna be sitting down. You don’t want that, you just need the suite.”’

“‘So I’m sitting backstage, and I already hate the fact that I didn’t win no awards, and I see Justin getting ready. I say “Where are you going?” and he says I’m going to perform” and I say “Where?” and says “On the Main Stage”, and I said “The stage that they won’t let me perform on?” And that’s when I was like “Give a black man a chance!”’ West explained before sarcastically apologising to US conservatives ‘I’m sorry middle America, I’m sorry red states.’”

[From NME]

So it seems that, according to West, what actually set him off was Timberlake perform on the main stage even though he’d been in an “intimate performing suite” too. Oh the complications and drama of the VMAs. He obviously did admit that he was already pretty riled up about not winning. It seems like at that point, Kanye was just looking for a reason to explode. He gave the interview in a tone that made it sound like, “Oh here’s my really good explanation that makes it all okay.” It seems like, instead of being petty about one thing, he’s just admitting he was being petty about a different thing. I’m not sure how that helps him seem like a better sport, but whatever. In other news, West’s new album “Graduation” is outselling 50 Cent’s “Curtis” by about 200,000 so far. I hate that someone with his attitude is winning. Someone go buy 200,001 of 50 Cent’s CD, please. You can throw them off a pier for all I care, just don’t let Kanye’s ego get any bigger. I think it might endanger his health.

Picture note by JayBird: Here’s Kanye at his 30th birthday bash in New York in June. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Sharon Osbourne seems to have disappeared lately, going to the United Kingdom to host X-Factor, an talent quest with Dannii Minogue and Mr Idol himself Simon Cowell. In case you aren’t familiar with the format, as far as I can tell it’s identical to American Idol.

The new season of X-Factor started recently and Sharon has been doing some interviews to support it, in whch she tries her best to take the bitch crown from Simon Cowell’s head.

‘I do dislike Madonna,’ Sharon tells the Daily Mirror.

‘She annoys me. I’ve met her a few times and found her very cold and very rude.

‘She’s annoyed me for years…way before all the “buying a baby” thing.’

Now Magazine

Not only does she dislike Madonna, she doesn’t seem too impressed with Courtney Love either.

“I will never have time for Courtney Love. She was the first person to give my son Jack the prescription drug OxyContin. There’s not a shadow of doubt in my mind about that. My dislike towards her is very personal.

“I’m not saying Jack wouldn’t have taken it if she hadn’t given it to him, but I’m appalled that an adult mother would give that to a 15-year-old boy. How could she do that to someone else’s child? I haven’t had a row with her, but I will never talk to her.”

Monsters and Critics

I guess she doesn’t want to risk her Mum-of-the-Year crown by admitting she forgot to teach her son to say no to drugs. I’m kidding here, even great parents have kids that go off the rails. Sharon does seem to love her kids and keep them close, which is lucky as she’s feuding with everyone else in her family it seems. In this interview, she admits a period of not talking to her dad, and not speaking to her maternal side of the family. The interview was given in response to her brother David Arden’s claims that she hates Simon Cowell and Dannii Minogue, which Sharon denies. Her brother also claims she chose a different grave for her father than the one he requested.

“My brother said dad wanted to be buried in a churchyard in Surrey with my mum. But although he came back into my life in 2002 when Alzheimer’s had started to take hold, he never once told me that.

“Dad was a Jew and his sister, nephew and girlfriend all insisted he wanted to be buried in a Jewish cemetery in his hometown. So who was I to believe – my brother or three other people?

“The reason I didn’t go to his funeral was because I couldn’t bear to have one side of the family staring daggers at the other over his coffin.

“I couldn’t win. Instead I paid for it all and stayed away. I’ll be there for the head stone laying ceremony in November.

“But I’ll never visit my mum’s grave. I’d be the world’s biggest hypocrite if I did because I didn’t like her and didn’t communicate with her.”

Daily Mail

Sharon does seem capable of picking a fight with anyone, and is definitely not talking to her brother right now. Then again, if husband Ozzy Osbourne is as vague as he comes across on The Osbournes, there would be no satisfaction in fighting with him.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Sharon Osbourne is shown on 9/10 outside the Ivy. Thanks to WENN for the photo.

Say what you want about whinging sore-loser Kanye West, his new album, “Graduation,” is said to be musically superior and more of a move forward for the ego-challenged artist than 50 Cent’s “Curtis.”

Both artists released new albums yesterday, with 50 famously saying that if Kanye outsold him, he’d retire. The reviews and the projected sales are in, and the more obnoxious of the two may prevail.

Former producer Kanye is all too aware of how full of himself he is, and includes countless references in his lyrics to his battles with self-importance and wealth. “Graduation” is said to be a musical step forward for Kanye with a mix of multiple genres, and catchy and unique tracks. Collaborations with Daft Punk and Coldplay’s Chris Martin help make the album diverse and appealing to a wide audience, which cannot be said of 50′s album.

Here’s a review from the NY Times of West’s new album. The main criticism the reviewer seems to have is that Kanye is tripping over his own ego. They’re lauding the music and lyrics:

Mr. West is smart, forthright, thoroughly musical and nobody’s fool. On his previous albums, songs like “Jesus Walks” and “Crack Music” connected his own story to wider perspectives: community pride, thoughts of family, questions of purpose and accountability. But now that he’s “major” (as he exulted on his 2005 album “Late Registration”), with a worldwide audience awaiting his album, Mr. West’s horizons are shrinking. This time it’s all about him. He knows it; as the album begins, he calls himself “Mr. Fresh, Mr. … by his self he’s so impressed…”

As his own producer, Mr. West maintains quality control to rival any of the luxury brands he name-drops. Somehow his productions build momentum even when they revolve around a handful of repeated samples. Nearly every song on “Graduation” is memorable for both its hooks and its overall sound.

Mr. West can get Chris Martin of Coldplay to sing the hook on “Homecoming.” He can afford a Steely Dan sample on “Champion.” He has guest appearances from T-Pain, providing a filtered-voice hook on “Good Life,” and from Lil Wayne, free-associating on “Barry Bonds.”

While Mr. West is inordinately fond of soft rock — which helps him reach an audience that shies away from the brittle, freeze-dried productions of hard-core hip-hop — he is also savvy enough to latch on to a hard-nosed electronic hook from Daft Punk in “Stronger,” where he tells a girl, “I’ve been on ya/Since Prince was on Apollonia /Since O. J. had Isotoners.”

“Graduation” has some clever rhymes and some honesty. There are plenty of Mr. West’s latest career reflections, from a half-apology for his tacky outfit on the Grammys to an entire song, “Big Brother,” about his respect for and rivalry with Jay-Z.

But two things are missing from “Graduation.” One is the sense of humor that crackled through songs like Mr. West’s 2005 hit “Gold Digger.” (This album’s tale of a pickup, “Drunk and Hot Girls,” has a pulsating sample from the German rock minimalists Can, but little flair in its lyrics.)

The bigger problem is that on “Graduation,” for the first time, Mr. West can’t see beyond his own fame. “Homecoming” takes lyrics from “Home,” a song Mr. West released on a mixtape. In “Home,” John Legend sang about soldiers who weren’t coming home, while “Homecoming” chides Chicago, his hometown, for not being quite proud enough of his Mr. West’s success.

[From the NY Times]

“Curtis” is being dismissed as more of the same from 50. It’s said to be the same solid rap we’ve come to expect from him, along with predictable lyrics about his former hard knock life.

Neither self-deprecation nor humility is part of Fiddy’s equation. He’s more concerned about squashing rivals, real and imagined (“My Gun Go Off,” “I Still Kill”), highlighting his street pedigree and reminding us of his bottomless wealth.

The disc is mostly standard-issue gangsta talk that only in moments recalls vintage Fiddy such as “Wanksta” or “P.I.M.P.” For example, on the menacing funk of “Fully Loaded Clip,” Fiddy takes aim at rap/R&B elite who’ve gone soft, snickering: “When Jay and Beyonce was um-um kissing/ I was cooking 1,000 grams in my kitchen/ When Nas was telling Kelis, “I love you, boo”/ I was shining my nine, you know how I do.” And over the deep bass thuds of “I Get Money,” which features a classic Audio Two sample, Fiddy gloats: “They callin’ me cocky/ I come up out the jeweler, they callin’ me Rocky/ It’s the ice on my neck man, the wrist and my left hand/ bling like BA-LOW, you like my style.”

As much as Fiddy banks on ruthless rhymes and nouveau riche bragging, he also fancies himself a rugged sex symbol. Hence the obligatory cuts that reveal his sensitive thug side, notably, “Amusement Park” and “Peep Show,” the latter featuring a lewd verse from Eminem. However, the tracks capture little of the magic of past winners such as the touching “21 Questions” or the seductive “Candy Shop.”

[From Yahoo! Music]

What’s more is that the advance sales are in and West’s album, with its mix of songs that are more radio-friendly, is expected to be more of a commercial success.

Judging these guys on their personalities, I would root for 50 any day. In the interviews I’ve seen with him, he comes off as genuinely kind and humble. He just seems like a nice guy to me. Kanye, however, is the biggest crybaby sore loser in the music business, and publicly bitches over every minor perceived wrong.

A lot of people feel the same, and Yahoo! Buzz reports that searches for 50 Cent have consistently outnumbered Kanye West, with searches the music section at two to one. What’s more is that 50 Cent’s first video off of “Curtis,” “I Get Money” is outranking Kanye’s first video, “Stronger” by about 1,500 user votes.

Personality and commercial success are two different things. They’re both incredibly successful musicians, with 50 excelling in business ventures too. At least 50 has a lot to fall back on if he does end up retiring, but considering how popular he is, that doesn’t seem likely.

Here’s 50 Cent’s “I Get Money” (lyrics NSFW)

Kanye West’s “Stronger” featuring Daft Punk

Dina Lohan saddens me. Sometimes at night when I lay in bed, unable to sleep, I think about her and how crazy and delusional, and my life seems a lot better in comparison. A LOT of people (probably in the low billions) have blamed Lindsay Lohan’s problems on her mom. If nothing else, she blurred the lines between child and parent in a way that seems to have really messed Lindsay up. But based on most of the stories we’ve read and the pictures we’ve seen, it seems that Dina really encouraged Lindsay’s hard partying lifestyle – for her own gain. Whenever Lindsay’s pathetic state of debauchery is brought up with other celebrities, they always bring up Dina Lohan. I’m pretty sure a press release must have gone out to all of Hollywood, instructing all celebrities to comment on her stupidity. Jodie Foster mentioned Dina in an interview – nothing new or surprising in and of itself. But of course Dina can’t keep quiet and has to fire back, in her written-by-Opera-and-or-a-therapist style that makes me want to slap her.

“In response to Jodie Foster’s question in a Gotham magazine interview, ‘Can I just ask, where is [Lindsay Lohan's] mother? I mean, really, where is her mother?’ Dina answers: I’m right here, waiting to be called out so I can contact a gossip website and fight back. Lohan tells 24Sizzler.com about Foster’s remarks:

“‘It really saddens me that a mom would comment on another mom without ever meeting me! Ironically Lindsay’s talent was compared to Jodie Foster’s as a little girl! I don’t know what Jodie dealt with as a young Hollywood actress but I do know if it weren’t for her mother she would not be a successful actress today! I’m sure her mother made many sacrifices for her to be successful.

“All we want as parents is to cultivate our children’s dreams, whatever field they choose. She has no idea who we are and what we have dealt with! If she has a question to ask me, don’t ridicule me publicly! She should know how the press twists the truth! Don’t judge without facts!”

[From Us Magazine]

When you make your life – and your daughter – so ridiculously public, people will judge without meeting you. Each person who writes about you doesn’t need to have sat don for a heart to heart to realize you’re a moron who’s whored her daughter out in some pathetic attempt to grab a little bit of fame for yourself. Well, now you have it. Dina Lohan seems to really think she has some sort of moral high ground over the rest of the world. You know how annoying it is when people say they don’t have the problem, it’s the rest of the world that has it? That’s pretty much Dina Lohan’s mentality. “Hey, I don’t have the problem for doing coke with my daughter, the rest of the world has the problem for judging me without meeting me!” Dina Lohan, you’re the problem. You’re completely delusional. Feel free to send your retort to all the blogs now.

Picture note by JayBird:

Here’s Dina Lohan’s upper annoying upper lip celebrating her cover appearance on The Boulevard Magazine last year. Why is she on the cover of a magazine? Because she’s a famous hanger-on. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Kanye West is pissed that MTV won’t “give a black man a chance” (his words, not mine) by giving him any of their prestigious Moon Man awards. And in a cutting off his nose to spite his face move, Kanye is boycotting the network. The dude is seriously a poor loser.

“Rapper Kanye West has vowed to boycott cable channel MTV after missing out on five awards at the Video Music Awards on Sunday. The ‘Gold Digger’ hitmaker made his hurt feelings known after the event in Las Vegas, hurling abuse at MTV bosses as cameras rolled backstage. He ranted: ‘That’s two years in a row… Give a black man a chance.’

“And he hadn’t calmed down by the time he hit the airwaves on New York radio station Z100 on Monday morning. He even attacked the VMA organisers for exploiting Britney Spears, who opened the show with a disastrous performance of her new single. He told the radio station: ‘They exploited Britney in helping to end her career. When Britney was opening, near the end, I felt so bad for her. I said: “Man, it’s a dirty game. This game will chew you up and spit you out.”’

“He went on to tell Z100 DJ JJ that he felt misled and ‘betrayed’ by MTV bosses, and promised to never work with the network again. West revealed he has already cancelled planned appearances set for this week.

[From Ireland Online]

It’s hard to say if that’s a bad move for Kanye or a bad move for MTV. The network has really been struggling lately and has lost a huge amount of their audience to BET and the internet. Though they were certainly the forerunners in television music, they’ve focused far too much on reality programming and not enough on airing music videos. Losing another popular artist couldn’t help things for MTV – the question is whether it can help things for Kanye. Though he could stand to be taken down a peg. I think he’s around 6 feet tall – five and a half of that is actually Kanye, the other six inches are his ego. If this move ends up being a mistake, maybe it’ll humble him… but likely just piss him off even more.

Kanye was also annoyed with Pamela Anderson, even though they were friends, and she co-starred in his video for “Touch the Sky.”

“The rapper also had harsh words for his one-time video co-star Pamela Anderson, who he felt ‘disrespected’ him as she introduced his VMA performance.

“The former Baywatch babe said: ‘One of the best times I’ve ever had was making out with the next performer in the middle of the desert.’

“‘I think I had my tongue so far down his throat I could taste his fiancée – and I might need a repeat performance later tonight.’

“West was far from amused: “I’m engaged, and I feel like it’s disrespectful to my relationship.’”

[From Ireland Online]

I’m not going to say that was the smartest joke I’ve ever head, but it was way too smart for me to believe that Pamela Anderson wrote it. I’m sure some MTV writer thought he was being clever, and Anderson just read it off the teleprompter. Kanye is one of those guys that just wants to be mad at people. He can always find someone to have a beef with. I agree with some of our commenters who said they couldn’t see what was so special about Kanye. Apart from spending a lot of money on is music videos, I don’t see what sets him apart from most other rappers. He doesn’t seem particularly innovative – or at least not enough so to justify his ego.

Update: Here’s a video from “The Insider” of Kanye’s expletive-laced tantrum. It’s even worse to hear it than to read it. He seems slightly off his rocker.

Picture note by JayBird: Here’s Kanye at the VMAs in Las Vegas. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Mischa Barton and Paris Hilton had a very public spat last year, with Mischa saying that Paris “seems to hate everyone around her age who is more successful. Silly bitch – she does steal people’s boyfriends.” Paris retorted saying she “didn’t even know” Mischa and that “she is the one who is trying to stir up a rivalry. I have never said a word about her… but she seems to be spending a lot of time thinking about me.”

In return, Paris’ mouthpiece, Elliot Mintz said that “a lot of celebrities are using Paris’ name so they can get some ink and Mischa seems to be one of them.”

Mischa then dismissed the stealing boyfriends remark, said it was a joke and said “Paris isn’t my rival. I met her one or two times and she’s making out there’s this big rivalry between us and there so isn’t.” [Details from People.com]

Mischa’s then-boyfriend brought it home by saying “Has Paris nothing better to do? At least Misch has a job – she’s a respected actress.”

So these two haven’t had much love for each other since February, 2006 when it all started. Paris wants to mend fences with Mischa now and recently reached out to her, bitching about how all her other girlfriends suck, but Mischa wasn’t having it:

Paris Hilton – playing her “New Paris” role to the hilt – phoned ex-BFF Mischa Barton, cooing about mending their prickly relationship – and gushing that of all her frenemies, she missed the ex-”O.C.” star the most! Said a source: “Paris then went into a rant about the mess Nichole Richie’s made of her life, how Britney Spears snubbed her – and that Lindsay Lohan’s white trash and destined to be dead soon.” Soured by Paris’s poison tongue, Mischa blew off an invite for a just-us-girlies-get-together… and hung up abruptly. Just days later… you guess it!… Mischa heard Paris was slamming her as “a jealous witch!” Mee-Ow!

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, Mike Walker's column, September 10, 2007]

Of all the young Hollywood crowd, Mischa seems to have her life most together, and that’s smart of her not to fall for Paris’ bullshit. Maybe she should have put up with Paris for a little while though if only to get some much-needed fashion advice. The poor girl is gorgeous but she looks like total shit most of the time due to her poor outfit choices. For everything you can say about Paris, she looks well put together and works it. Being a good person and looking good require completely different skillsets.

Paris Hilton is shown on 9/1 at the Play For Good Foundation Gala in Mallorca, Spain. Mischa Barton is shown on 8/6 at the Paper Magazine party for Rihanna in NY. Thanks to PRPhotos.

Rich people do the craziest things. Crazy rich people do even crazier things. I remember ten years ago when some person left all their money in their will to their dog, and it got a lot of press, but amounted to about half a million at most. Well Leona Helmsley, the billionaire who passed away last week – and was known since her 1988 tax evasion trial as the “Queen of Mean” – left $12 freaking million to her dog Trouble. She left $5 million to two of her four grandchildren, and cut the other two out completely “for reasons which are known to them,” according to the will. Ouch. You know how they say, “You can’t take it with you”? Well apparently you can’t, but you can be mean well beyond the grave. The two grandsons who did get money only get it on a contingency basis – they have to visit their father’s grave at least once a year. I wonder how they’re going to verify that?

“Real estate billionaire Leona Helmsley left $12 million in her will for her dog Trouble but cut out two of her four grandchildren entirely. Helmsley, the “Queen of Mean” who was famously quoted as saying “only the little people pay taxes” before going to jail for tax evasion, died August 20 at 87. The 14-page will was made public in Surrogate’s Court on Tuesday and reported in New York media on Wednesday, with the New York Post headlining the story “Rich bitch,” referring to the female dog.

“Trouble, a white Maltese, will be cared for by Helmsley’s brother Alvin Rosenthal, who was left $10 million. Two grandchildren, David and Walter Panzirer, will be left $5 million each as long as they visit their father’s grave at least once a year — Helmsley’s son, Jay Panzirer, died in 1982 — and her chauffeur will get $100,000. ‘I have not made any provisions in this will for my grandson Craig Panzirer or my granddaughter Meegan Panzirer for reasons which are known to them,’ Helmsley wrote. The will calls for Trouble to be entombed alongside Helmsley and husband Harry Helmsley, who died in 1997, in their $1.4 million mausoleum, for which Leona Helmsley set aside $3 million for upkeep including annual cleanings.”

[From Reuters]

Talk about a big bag of crazy. I’m not sure how old trouble is, but let’s say for argument that she’s 7 years old, and super healthy and could miraculously live another twenty years (because dogs fed diamonds can live a really, really long time). That would provide Trouble with $600,000 annually to live on. I’m not sure if dogs have to pay inheritance taxes. Now if Trouble invested that money wisely in a diversified portfolio with some good mutual funds, she could easily garner twice that a year and have more than enough to secure all her puppies futures. Though I’d stay away from those other two Helmsley grandchildren – something tells me Trouble is more than a little hated right now.

Images thanks to Splash Photos.

Lance Bass has been getting a lot of bad press since he moved to New York City for a role in “Hairspray.” He gave an interview to New York Magazine, and they did a tiny little write-up as a result, mentioning that Bass wasn’t in love with the city, especially the real estate market. He’s also had many mentions on local blogs since moving here, all of which have stated that he’s been rude to fans.

“Lance Bass is here for a few months to star as Corny Collins in Hairspray. He’s not sure he likes New York so much. First off, it took three weeks, and three brokers, to find an apartment. ‘There’s a lot of pieces of crap here for a lot of money,’ he says. ‘And I don’t think anyone here has any style. I was looking at fully furnished places and it was like, you can either have a bunch of floral prints or some dusty couch from the 1960s.’ But he’s adapting. ‘My walking pace has picked up a lot,’ he says. ‘And apparently I’m ruder. I read that someone met me at a club and told me I looked great and I was like, “Don’t even think about taking a picture.” Which really sounds like me. And then they printed a picture they’d taken of me, which makes even less sense.’ He’s not hanging out at fellow ’N Sync alum Justin Timberlake’s barbecue joint. ‘I’ve been a few times,’ he says. ‘But it’s really up there. The Upper East Side? I’m not in college anymore.’ And, after coming out of the closet not so long ago, he has another startling admission to make: ‘I was the worst dancer in the band. I kind of hate to dance.’”

[From New York Magazine]

Lance didn’t like the quotes, and fired back on his MySpace page, along with issuing a statement to a few press agencies. That’s not really helping his image as a control freak. He’s now saying he “loves New York” and is really pissed by the “fake quotes” – saying the reporter, Jada Yuan, put “words in my mouth.” Oh his MySpace page [http://www.myspace.com/basslance], Lance wrote, “This dumb reporter just put words in my mouth and turned everything I said into a negative. I told her I love NY and I will probably be doing the bi-coastal thing now because I love it so much.” He responded to the quotes in an article in People today.

“As for what exactly got him so worked up, here’s a breakdown:

The claim: It took him three weeks to find an apartment. “There’s a lot of pieces of crap here for a lot of money,” he was quoted as saying. “And I don’t think anyone here has any style.”

His response? “I told her the first few apts I looked at were pieces of crap and the owners had no style at all… that turned into ‘Lance thinks New Yorkers have no style!’”

The claim: He’s not hanging out at fellow ‘N Sync alum Justin Timberlake’s barbecue joint. “I’ve been a few times,” he says. “But it’s really up there. The Upper East Side? I’m not in college anymore.”

His response? “I eat at Justins [sic] new place all the time, but it is really far away in the upper east side and always full of a college crowd. She turned that into ‘Lance doesnt [sic] go to Justins [sic] restaurant cause its too far away and he doesnt [sic] like it because he is not in college anymore!’ Um.. I didnt [sic] go to college, why the hell would I say that!”

[From People]

New York Magazine is highly respected. You can never know what an individual journalist will do, but they’re part of the New York Times – it’s not some freebie you pick up from a bin. They do a great job at deeply researched, in-depth pieces – along with the occasional New York entertainment related puff piece, like the article about Bass. They issued a rebuttal that was pretty funny for such a serious magazine. And they reiterate that Bass was a terrible dancer.

“We were going to be nice about this, because we’re actually quite fond of Bass, but then we heard that he called Ms. Yuan a dumb reporter on MySpace. So we invite Bass to breath deeply, stop reading Perez Hilton (who posted the story on his own site under the typically over-the-top headline, ‘Lance Bass Hates New York City’), and take some lessons in reading comprehension. Bass’s beef boils down to two points — he says he didn’t say New Yorkers have no style, and he does go to Justin Timberlake’s restaurant. Oh, and he really loves New York!

“New York would like to make the following points: (1) We stand by the interview; Bass was not misquoted. (2) Bass is not quoted as saying New Yorkers have no style — it’s clear that he’s referring to the apartments he looked at. (3) The piece also does not suggest that Bass doesn’t hang out at Justin Timberlake’s restaurant. In fact, it specifically quotes him as saying he goes there. (4) Though Bass’s quote about his dancing ability (“I was the worst dancer in the band”) has not been called into question, we’d like to reiterate that Bass was, indeed, the worst dancer in ‘N Sync. (5) Bass now says he’s going bi-coastal; he never mentioned that to us, but we’re glad to hear it! Welcome to New York, Lance.”

[From New York Magazine]

I don’t think pissing off a bunch of New Yorkers is a good way to get started. I live in New York, and these are scary, scary people. They will kick you in the head as soon as look at you, and if you dare to smile at one, they will glare and snarl “What the f*$) is wrong wit chu?” This happened to me yesterday. And last week. And sixteen other times. Now I don’t smile anymore. And I don’t even have some upside-down looking face like Lance Bass, so I can only imagine what could happen to him.

Picture note by JayBird: Here’s Lance at the I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry Premiere on 07/12/2007. Header image of Lance at the Hairspray New York City Premiere on 7/16/2007. Images thanks to PR Photos.

I don’t normally sit around having a lot of respect for Rob Schneider… because he’s Rob Schneider. He’s Deuce Bigalow. Actually, that is a good reason to have respect for him. Anyway, last week Lindsay Lohan was scheduled to be on the “Tonight Show.” Then she was arrested on a DUI for the second time, you know the rest of the story. So Rob Schneider took her place on the show, dressing up like her, including the ridiculous ankle monitoring device Lindsay’s been parading around. He got some good jokes in there, but a lot of it was funny because it was true. When Jay Leno asked Schneider-as-Lohan what happened, he responded, “Well, it was my assistant’s fault. I asked for a Diet Coke,” jokingly implying that the assistant mistook coke the drink for coke the drug. Leno also asked Schneider-as-Lohan which of her movies was her favorite. “I think Herbie Fully Loaded. Herbie was the car; I was fully loaded.” At one point Schneider took off the alcohol monitoring device and started drinking from it, revealing that it was actually a flask. I thought the whole thing was pretty funny. Dina Lohan, aka WonderMom, didn’t.

“We have a great respect for Jay Leno, but we are disappointed in the path he chose to allow a guest to make light of a very serious situation concerning Lindsay. Thank you to Craig Ferguson for not making a mockery of such a serious situation to which teens and young adults are facing across the country.”

[From Access Hollywood]

Well today, Rob Schneider responded, and not in his characteristic juvenile humor way. He was right on the ball.

“’When Mrs. Lohan stops partying with her child, then I’ll have an ounce of respect for her… I don’t care if her parents are both crummy – you cannot blame your parents anymore. She’s not a kid… Lindsay, get it together, America will forgive you but you gotta do something positive with your life. I hope she does okay but at a certain point, there’s so many bigger problems in the world than Lindsay Lohan. I hope she gets her head out of her nice, cute little rear end and finds a life for herself. She’s very talented, and a special little actress but there are so many people out there who’d trade positions with her in a heartbeat and use it better than she is.’”

[From People]

That’s so well said, I don’t even have a snotty reply. Except that I’m pleasantly surprised that such an on-the-mark statement came from Rob Schneider. I can’t believe that Dina Lohan has time to comment on Rob Schneider’s parody of Lindsay, considering all she has going on. She’s got a kid about to lose her life on one side of the country and she’s busy fighting her estranged husband on the other side. She really thought people making fun of Lindsay for being a moron was so important she had to condemn them? Who in the world is that nutcase to judge anyone? It’s like the rest of the world realizes she’s an enabler and a user, and she just sits there singing “I don’t hear you!” over and over with her hands on her ears. So Dina Lohan, thanks for being such a moron that you make Rob Schneider look like Socrates. It’s been a good day for you.

Note by Celebitchy: I’ve been looking for the video, but it’s not available on youtube any more thanks to a “copyright claim” by NBC. Don’t those network suits realize yet that the Internet is the best publicity they’re going to get?

Paris Hilton’s grandfather, Barron Hilton, is so pissed off that the tart has sullied the Hilton name that he’s not only decided to cut Paris off from her expected $60 million inheritance (or $50 million, or $100 million, depending on who you believe), he’s cut off her entire extended family. None of his 11 grandchildren will get a penny, and when he kicks he plans to donate the entire billion he’s getting from the sale of the famed Hilton hotel chain to charity.

Hilton senior, the only member of the family left with a sizeable stake in the huge hotel chain, has let it be known that he intends to donate to charity the £1 billion he will gain from this month’s sale of the company to private equity firm Blackstone.

The money will go to the Conrad N. Hilton Foundation, the charity set up in the name of the founder of the family business. The 79-year-old patriarch is said to have told his high-living family that he is cutting Paris loose – and for good measure his other 11 grandchildren, too, none of whom will now benefit from the windfall. Instead, he is determined to carry on the family tradition for philanthropy.

“He was, and is, extremely embarrassed by how the Hilton name has been sullied by Paris,” says Jerry Oppenheimer, the author of House Of Hilton, the biography of the clan. “He doesn’t want to leave unearned wealth to his family.”

[From The Daily Mail]

Paris has two brothers Barron, 17, and Conrad, 13, along with sister Nicky, 23. I couldn’t find out much about her cousins who have also lost tens of millions each thanks to Paris’ fame-whoring antics, but her father Rick has five brothers and two sisters, so it’s clear that a lot of people are affected by this.

Paris has her giant hands in everything, and won’t be likely to suffer much from not receiving her inheritance. She’s trying to restart her music career and is taking voice lessons, and she just got a three year contract to represent teen-focused Bliss Diamonds.

She was estimated to have earned $7 million last year, and she’s expanding her empire, bragging that “I’m developing my own hotels, casinos and clubs and getting into real estate. It’s crazy at such a young age. I’m doing so much.” She got an incredible $10 million to do a sixth series of The Simple Life, $2 million for perfume in her name, and she has a line of purses, a cell phone game, an animated series coming out on MTV, and there’s surely a bunch of other crap she’s slapped her name on that I can’t be bothered to look up.

The Daily Mail says that her dad will be missing out on his inheritance, but that he “will not be short of money because of his property portfolio.”

It’s a good thing Paris is keeping so busy. The rest of her family is soon going to be coming to her for handouts.

Update: According to TMZ, this story is pure fabrication by The Daily Mail. They say Paris will inherit about $30 million, which is less than earlier reports. Who knows what’s true at this point.