In the least surprising news of the week, Gary Coleman is divorcing his wife of 8 months, 22-year-old Shannon Price. Lest you fear Coleman might resort to his typical child-like hysterics, rest assured that the couple is keeping it classy: they’re going to film the end of their marriage on an episode of Divorce Court.

Shortly after their marriage was first revealed to the public, Coleman revealed that he and Price hadn’t yet consummated their then six month old marriage. Price told The Insider that Gary has a terrible temper (as had already been well-documented on various reality television shows… and several police reports) and yells and throws things when he doesn’t get his way. You know, if you’re most famous for your pocket-sized statute and child-like features (and you hate that that’s what you’re known for), it makes sense that perhaps you wouldn’t engage in child-like temper tantrums. Apparently that’s exactly what’s torn the pair apart.

It may not have been the world’s shortest marriage, but in a way… Diminutive Diff’rent Strokes alum Gary Coleman is ostensibly divorcing his wife of just eight months, Shannon Price. The duo is keeping it classy and taking their marital woes to the small screen, having already taped an episode of Divorce Court set to hit syndication May 1-2.

Apparently Price, 22, can’t cotton to Coleman’s temper tantrums, announcing during the show that her 40-year-old mister “stomps the floor and yells, ‘Meehhhh,’ and starts throwing stuff around…He bashes his head in the wall, too.”

Another gripe: Coleman prefers staying at home with his train set to taking her out. Come to think of it, though, his penchant for toy locomotives could just be research. He’s got to do something to prepare for this trainwreck.

[From E! News]

I was under the impression that Gary Coleman was a regular guy who just happened to be short. But when you combine that with the temper tantrums, the love of playing with trains, and the inability to consummate his marriage, it makes you wonder if there’s something else going on with Gary Coleman. Either way, it’s clearly the best thing for Shannon Price. Aside from marrying Gary, she seems relatively normal. Obviously she’s got SOME issues going on, but she didn’t appear as obviously crazy as a lot of the people you see on TV. Maybe she can go on to live a normal life. Or maybe she’ll have her own reality show where she must choose from 30 short men. Now that’s television.

The Insider has several head-shaking interview clips with pint-sized washed-up former child actor Gary Coleman, 40, and his 22 year-old bride. We reported earlier in the week that Gary and his wife, Shannon Price, talked candidly about their volatile relationship in which they can go for a week without talking and Gary routinely throws stuff around the house in a rage. They’ve been married a whole six months after meeting on the set of one of Gary’s movies you’ve never heard of, Church Ball, where Price was an extra. Price didn’t recognize Coleman when he came up to her and told her she was too good looking to be an extra. Their romance moved from there, with Price bringing a ring and proposing to Coleman when he was in the hospital for three months after complications from thyroid surgery. He had a scare in the hospital and had to have an emergency tracheotomy so that he could breathe. Price was afraid he would die and didn’t want to lose him.

In interviews with The Insider, Price and Coleman admitted to the domestic problems they’ve been facing, with Price saying that they hadn’t made up after a fight earlier that day during which Coleman through the printer because he couldn’t figure out how to receive a fax. She said “It’s ok, I’m used to it.” Price answered that she did fear for her safety when she was questioned about it. She answered “a lot, yes,” and also said she feared for her three dachshund dogs, which Coleman doesn’t like. Coleman answered “That doesn’t mean I’m going to kill them.”

Coleman said that although he’s been with Price for a year they haven’t had sex. He said “It will happen when it will happen.” It came out earlier that Coleman said this was his first relationship ever, so maybe we can assume he’s a virgin. With a temper like that, it’s no wonder.

Here is their more involved interview. He looks less than sober to me in these videos.

And here’s Coleman saying he hasn’t had sex:

Thanks to Redlasso for the heads up on this.

Gary Coleman got married, to 22-year-old Shannon Price, in a secret ceremony on her birthday after she proposed to him. The couple met on a film set in 2006, and married on August 28th of last year. Here’s what they have to say about their secret marriage and the way they fight and can go a full week without talking to each other:

On their height difference:
Coleman, who is only 4’8” tall, admits that this is the first “romantic relationship” he has participated in. “I never got the opportunity to be romantic or feel romantic with anyone…I wasn’t saving myself, she just happened to be the one.”

Price, who stands over 5’7” tall, tells Inside Edition height was never a factor in their relationship. “He was ten feet tall to me because he was sweet and I really liked his personality. That doesn’t really matter to me.”

On the age difference:
Coleman says, “I don’t have issues with age, I have issues with intelligence…She’s more intelligent then I am and that’s what matters to me.”

Their courtship:
Price says, “He was really sweet and I didn’t know who he was. I didn’t grow up with Diff’rent Strokes. I actually didn’t like watching TV when I was younger.”

The wedding:
The couple married secretly on August 28, 2007 on a Nevada mountaintop after meeting on the set of one of Coleman’s movies. The ceremony was extremely intimate. Coleman says, “Nobody was around but the minister, preacher, the videographers, the photographer, the helicopter pilot and us. That was all that was there. There was nobody else.”

Price, who actually proposed to Coleman, tells Inside Edition he surprised her with their wedding on her 22nd birthday. “I didn’t know that I was going to be in a helicopter ride and seeing the Grand Canyon and getting married in the Valley of Fire. I had no clue,” says the blushing bride. “I mean I knew that we were getting married, but I thought it would be just a little chapel.”

On the secrecy of their marriage:
The couple also shares the reason they say they kept their marriage a secret. Price says, “I just want my own identity as well because I don’t want to be known as Gary Coleman’s wife.”

Her proud husband agrees. “I wouldn’t want that in a million years. I wouldn’t want you to be known as Gary Coleman’s wife. I hope you do get successful. She’s a great eBay-er. She’s a fabulous eBay-er. I hope she gets famous for that.”

The dynamic of their relationship:
Price describing the relationship as “off and on.” “We may go a week and not speak to each other, but that’s because you’re thinking and mulling things over,” says Coleman.

Price explains, saying, “Yeah, I’ve locked myself in a room and stayed there because I’m like, ‘You know what? I don’t even want to fight over this, its ridiculous.” Price admits on several occasions the fights have gone beyond yelling. “He lets his anger conquer him sometimes, I don’t like the violence, I really don’t…He throws things around, and sometimes he throws it in my direction…He’s got to damage something before his anger stops.”

According to Price, she has had to call the police on several occasions. “He actually got a disorderly conduct ticket one time because we had gotten into an argument, just a minor argument in Provo. The guy gave him a ticket and he freaked out and he was on six months probation.”

Inside Edition

WTF!?!? I know that domestic violence is a very personal issue, and what people consider to be domestic violence can actually vary, but this is domestic violence, right? Just because he’s throwing objects instead of punches doesn’t change it. Not to mention feeling so frightened you’re locking yourself in another room, you sometimes go days without talking, and you’ve felt the need to call the police ‘several times’.

In the article Shannon says that Gary undertook anger management classes, but on the morning of the interview he smashed their fax machine because it wasn’t working.

A secret wedding is also not a good sign. Shannon claims that she wanted to be seen as her own person, but fails to say what it is she does for a living besides selling Gary Coleman stuff on eBay. Was the wedding a secret because their families didn’t approve?

If you are in a violent situation call the police. If the need is less urgent you can talk to your doctor, church leader or domestic violence service such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline. Don’t hesitate to get help and get out.