Jack Nicholson has an extensive interview in the Sunday Mail, and it’s been enchanting me for some reason. Probably because I recently had a sex dream about Jack, and after reading this interview, I’ve convinced myself that I could be his last great romance. Don’t judge me. Yes, he’s older than my father. I don’t care. I love Jack. Anyway, since Jack rarely gives interviews, this one is a special treat. Jack at the age of 73 is quite interesting – he’s still a hellraiser/hippie, but he’s also quite thoughtful and introspective. Sigh… if he met me, he would want me to be his last great romance, right? The full Sunday Mail piece is here, and here are the highlights:

On picking up women: ‘I’m definitely still wild at heart. But I’ve struck bio-gravity. I can’t hit on women in public any more. I didn’t decide this; it just doesn’t feel right at my age.’ He pauses to get straight to the heart of his own theory of life. ‘If men are honest, everything they do and everywhere they go is for a chance to see women. There were points in my life where I felt oddly irresistible to women. I’m not in that state now and that makes me sad. But I also believe that a lot of the improvements in my character have come through ageing and the diminishing of powers. It’s all a balancing act; you just have to get used to the ride.’

On being thought of as an icon: ‘I hate it. I don’t want to be treated like the Medusa or the Lincoln Memorial. People have an idea of me which is not the reality. On set I’m an actor like every other actor. Most times, for every part I play, I can think of other actors who would be better. I worry from the moment I take a job. I worry about how I’m going to do it, if I can do it. I try to work out what I have to do on set and how I do that. I get extremely anxious. I panic. I can’t get it. It happens every time, and I get myself into this state, and then I walk on set and the director says, “Roll”, and all of a sudden all of it disappears and it’s all happening, and I relax and I’m doing what I do and I’m not even thinking about it. And I relax up until the moment they yell “Cut”.’

On taking supporting parts in romantic-comedies: ‘It’s very important. I am from a different era of movie acting. My career doesn’t depend on explosions and pyrotechnics. What I liked about this script is that the same rules apply. It hasn’t got people flying off walls and lots of guns and yelling. It’s a movie that’s based on a good script and good acting, and it’s supposed to move you. It’s the sort of movie I want to be a part of. In these times people need to be able to laugh.’

On plastic surgery: ‘I haven’t had surgery. I don’t want to be judgemental, but some of the things you see these days in Hollywood are a bit horrifying. I mean, I don’t know what’s going on here, but I don’t want to scare people. I’ve never been comfortable about surgery. I was on the receiving end of one of the very first chest augmentations. When I touched what felt like polythene, that was it. The fuse went out. Maybe it’s childish, but I couldn’t cope with it. I mean, if someone can fool me with a new chest or lips, then I’m happy to be fooled. But I have to admit I have a prejudice against it. I’m not worried about wrinkles, in myself or in women. I find them interesting. I can’t see so well, so sometimes I look in the mirror and I see how I was as a young man. But a few years back I noticed I don’t have any hair below my sock line, and I thought to myself, “Jackie, that’s an old man.”’

On knowing how to treat women: ‘I was raised entirely by women. My grandmother ran a beauty parlour and I spent most of my time there. She taught me manners and I learned how to be around women, what women liked. I am insanely well mannered and polite, and because of that I have nothing but gratitude for my upbringing.’

On mortality: ‘One of the toughest parts of ageing is losing your friends. At first it starts quietly, then pretty soon it’s every month, and you can’t help but think, “When is that bell going to go off for me?” And on top of that you feel this constant loss. At this time of life, you feel just a sword’s point from death. It’s frightening – who wants to face God and the clear white light? I know I definitely don’t. Yet.’

On still smoking pot: ‘I don’t tend to say this publicly, but we can see it’s a curative thing. The narcotics industry is also enormous. It funds terrorism and – this is a huge problem in America – fuels the foreign gangs. More than 85 per cent of men incarcerated in America are on drug-related offences. It costs $40,000 a year for every prisoner. If they were really serious about the economy there would be a sensible discussion about legalisation.’

On his more than $100 million worth of art: His home is stuffed with art by Matisse, Warhol, Tamara de Lempicka and Picasso; the collection is estimated to be worth over $100 million. ‘Now I’m at home so much more, there are these moments once in a while when I think, “Jesus, look at all that.” Those pictures actually intimidate a lot of people. I’m totally solid with the “truth is beauty/beauty is truth” idea. But if I’m around it too long I start to feel trapped in this material world. I think I mustn’t get owned by my possessions, I mustn’t fall prey to materialism. Sometimes I think, “Hell, I’m going to burn them all.”’

Not enjoying the night life: ‘My life has changed. I don’t enjoy the things I used to so much. I don’t go out to nightclubs, I don’t like clubs any more. I don’t go out raging, looking out for women; now it’s just a game that isn’t worth the candle. The last three times I’ve been in New York filming, I didn’t leave my hotel room for one single night. People won’t believe that, but it’s true. But you adjust your life to your circumstances, and I can spend a lot of time on my own. I think of myself as social, but my friends are always telling me, “Jack, you need to get out more.”’

On relationships: ‘I’ve had everything a man could ask for, but I don’t know if anyone could say I’m successful with affairs of the heart. I don’t know why. I would love that one last real romance. But I’m not very realistic about it happening. What I can’t deny is my yearning. I’ve been in love in my life, but it always starts with obsession that lasts exactly 18 months and then it changes. If I’d known and been prepared for that, I may have been able to orchestrate the whole relationship thing better. But when I’m with someone I’ve often defied every one of my conventions. I’ve been so struck I’ve said, “Come on, let’s go, let’s get married.” But no woman has ever recognised what I say as being legitimate. They think of my reputation, Jack the Jumper. I’m damned by what people think. Now I think I have a gap I won’t ever cross.’

On his split from Anjelica Houston, and regret: ‘The reality was that I was annihilated emotionally by the separation from Anjelica. That was probably the toughest period of my life.’ Asked if he wishes he could turn back time, he shakes his head. ‘I may have made a mistake, but I don’t want to go back and correct it. I would rather deal with it.’

On lady friends and love: ‘I would never complain about my life, even though I really would like to have a mate. It’s not like I’m starved for company – I have a few very good lady friends – but there’s only a certain amount of times a woman wants to see you and never go out for dinner. I got tired of arguing with women about going to have dinners, so I hired somebody to cook. The food is better at my house.’

[From The Daily Mail]

They really did break the mold with Jack, didn’t they? So, what do you think? Do you think he would go for me? I’m more than 40 years younger than him, I have big boobs and I love modern art? I think he’d like me.

Photos courtesy of WENN & PR Photos.

I was really surprised to hear that the Reese Witherspoon and Owen Wilson comedy How Do You Know finished a very low eighth at the box office on this, its opening weekend. I remember that Reese and Vince Vaughn’s Four Christmases really cleaned up at the box office when it opened around Thanksgiving, 2008, which was surprising because the film was generally considered to be total crap. How Do You Know didn’t fare much better with critics, with a current 35% on Rotten Tomatoes as compared to Christmases 25%. Still, it has Reese, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd and Jack Nicholson in it. How could it go so wrong? Tron Legacy also opened this weekend, as did that Yogi Bear movie and wide releases of The Fighter and Black Swan, all of which trounced the generally unremarkable romcom How Do You Know. (Update: Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, The Tourist and Tangled also outperformed this film.) Here’s more from Radar.

The box office numbers this weekend come with more extremely bad news for A-List stars, RadarOnline.com is reporting.

How Do You Know, starring Reese Witherspoon, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd and Jack Nicholson, is one spectacular flop, and will be among the biggest financial disasters for any studio in 2010.

How Do You Know, which cost $120 million to produce with all those big star paychecks, took in just $7.6 million its opening weekend. That’s one huge ouch!

The Tourist, with Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie, continued its slide after a mediocre opening last week. It finished fifth this weekend, taking in a tepid $8.7 million.

Number one in the box office rally was TRON: Legacy 3 D, with an estimated $43.6 million in ticket sales.

But the real winner, for the third weekend in a row, is Black Swan. The Natalie Portman thriller took in another $8.3 million this weekend in fewer than 1000 theaters. It has already grossed more than the mere $13 million it cost to produce.

[From Radar]

This makes me a little sad! I like romcoms and I love Reese. I would have seen this movie eventually, after The Fighter, Black Swan and Yogi Bear (I have a six year old). I guess that’s the problem. How Do You Know could have done well on a less crowded and less competitive opening weekend. They should have waited until next year to release it. It makes me wonder why they put it out for the holiday season. We have a lot more mindless action movies to look forward to instead of mindless chick flicks. I guess it’s a wash really.

Photos via AllMoviePhoto

Here are some new photos of Jack Nicholson (and Meryl Streep and Mike Nichols) at last night’s big AFI tribute for director Mike Nichols. I love Nichols – he’s done such classics as Carnal Knowledge, Working Girl (a favorite), Postcards From the Edge (sigh, I love that one too), The Graduate, and not-so-classic but still good/great films like Closer, Wit and Charlie Wilson’s War. Nichols is good friends with people like Emma Thompson, Jack, Meryl Streep and many, many others. So the turnout for his tribute was incredible. Look at Jack!

A few weeks ago, a publisher sent me a copy of Hollywood Hellraisers: the Wild Lives and Fast Times of Marlon Brando, Dennis Hopper, Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholsonby Robert Sellers. It was an extremely easy read, and if it’s your kind of thing, I would recommend it. The book had lots of details about all of those guys’ sex lives and there was a lot of interesting gossip from the 1970s that I was totally unfamiliar with. Like, both Warren and Jack pounced on Ali McGraw when she and Steve McQueen split up, even though Ali’s other ex Robert Evans warned both Jack and Warren that Ali was too vulnerable for their shenanigans. Another interesting story? Allegedly, Jack was all over Nicole Kidman right after her divorce from Tom Cruise. Like, Jack really, really wanted Nicole. I don’t know if that’s true, but it sounds truthy, doesn’t it?

Anyway, look at some of my favorite bitches. Emma is so f-cking gorgeous, even if the dress is a repeat Westwood from last year. And MERYL!!! Love, love, love. Julia Roberts’ dress sucks though.

Lindsay Lohan is wanted by Los Angeles police in relation to the DUI she received in 2007. It is unclear exactly what it is she is wanted for, though it may have something to with a parole violation; she is on a three-year probation. An officer says that though they are not actively looking for her, if she comes in contact with police, she will be taken in. Her lawyer claims that the whole thing is born out of a “misunderstanding” that he hopes to resolve next week.

“Since her case was resolved, Ms. Lohan has been in compliance with all the terms and conditions of her probation and all orders of the court,” her lawyer Shawn Chapman Holley said in a statement Saturday, referring to Lohan’s 2007 conviction for driving under the influence. “The warrant issued on Friday was, in our view, born out of a misunderstanding which I am confident I can clear up next week.”

A hearing for Lohan is set for Monday morning in a Beverly Hills court. “The judge apparently has indicated that Ms. Lohan should be in attendance,” said L.A. DA spokeswoman Sandi Gibbons. Lohan, 22, is currently serving a three-year probation term for the DUI incident, the actress’s second.

“We are not actively looking for Ms. Lohan at this time,” Beverly Hills Police Lt. Mark Rosen said at a Saturday press conference. “We are not anticipating her surrender this weekend. But if she comes in contact with police, she’s subject to arrest. As for why we’re not actively looking for her, that’s not our procedure for this type of warrant. Her attorney is hoping to resolve this issue in the coming week. If it’s not resolved, I’m sure we’ll negotiate her voluntary surrender.”

[from People]

After the warrant was announced, Lindsay had an odd night out on the town. It started with drinks (she sipped on an unidentified drink in a cocktail glass) and at 1:45 am she ended up at Jack Nicholson’s home, where she and her friends insisted to be let in. At 4:30 she was picked up and dropped off at Samantha Ronson’s house, where the two of them had quite a row. At some point, a window was broken and the police were called.

Lohan’s Friday night at the Chateau began around 8 p.m. Arriving with three female friends, and clad in a loose black top adorned with sequins, she was in an upbeat mood during dinner at a patio table at the West Hollywood hotspot, witnesses say. Lohan laughed, chatted and texted on her phone. The actress dined on soup and opted for water and an unidentified drink in a cocktail glass, while her friends had red wine. The group stayed well past 11.

Around 1:45 a.m., Lohan showed up outside actor Nicholson’s house on Mulholland Drive. Witnesses say the actress, accompanied by pals, buzzed the intercom numerous times and grew agitated, asking for “Jack” to open the gate.

[from People]

I’m confused. The officer specifically said that if Lindsay were to come in contact with law enforcement, she would be taken into custody. Then she proceeds to have a brawl with her girlfriend and break windows, but doesn’t have to go to the station. How does this make any sense?

And Jack Nicholson – really? He has to have more sense than to associate with Lindsay. He may have a reputation for being a bad boy himself, but isn’t he a little old to be letting a gaggle of girls into his house at 2 a.m.? I wouldn’t believe this story, but People tends to be a reliable source.

Lindsay and Sam’s arguments seem to be getting worse – and closer together. From the view of an outsider, they spend more time fighting with each other than being happy. Michael Lohan, who is vocal about his hatred for Samantha, may have a point about her influence over Lindsay’s life, though Li-Lo wasn’t exactly in a great place before Sam, either. Several years ago she at least had legitimate and recent projects to her name. But she’s turning more and more into Paris Hilton – famous simply for being famous.

Lindsay, Sam and Lindsay’s new car are shown out on 3/12/09. Credit: WENN.com

My first thought was “California has a Hall of Fame?” and in my head, the question was asked in Gov. Schwarzenegger’s voice. Which, as it turns out, is entirely appropriate because The California Hall of Fame started out two years ago as the brainchild of Maria Shriver, California’s first lady.

Shriver wanted a way to celebrate both native-born Californians and people who had come to California to work, play, inspire, innovate and live. It’s a nice tribute for a lot of Californian artists, entrepreneurs and icons.

Jack Nicholson, Jane Fonda, Quincy Jones and the late Theodor “Dr. Seuss” Geisel were among those inducted into the California Hall of Fame Monday night.

Also inducted by California Gov. and former film star and governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and First Lady Maria Shriver during the ceremony at The California Museum in Sacramento were Dave Brubeck, Robert Graham, Jack LaLanne, Dorothea Lange, Julia Morgan, Linus Pauling, Leland Stanford, and Alice Waters.

The California Museum’s Hall of Fame is a program created by Shriver to celebrate Californians “who embody the state’s spirit of inspiration and innovation,” the museum said.

[From United Press International]

The museum put a lot of thought into the event, even gathering up personal papers, childhood mementos and individual awards from the inductees. Nicholson’s childhood report cards were on display, complete with one teacher’s note that Nicholson “needs to show better self control” (which just proves we don’t really change as we get older). Nicholson and Fonda even let the museum borrow their Oscars for a temporary display. It’s a lovely tribute to these icons, and it probably meant a lot to the inductees to be so honored by their home state.

Note by Celebitchy: UPI has a slideshow of the event, which was attended by Clint Eastwood, Quincy Jones, Rita Moreno, and Dave Brubeck among others. Jack LaLanne, 94, still looks awesome! He received a Spirit of California medal direct from Governor Schwarzenegger.

Photo below is of Jane Fonda at the season opening of the Metropolitan Opera on 9/22/08. Credit: PRPhotos.

Jack Nicholson at a Laker’s game on 6/12/08. Credit: Fame
Jack Nicholson has come to a realization that comes to all of us at some stage of life, but for most of us it comes a little earlier. When you start getting on in years, you get a bit tubby and you lose your hair, and it can be hard to pick up chicks and still look respectable. Or even just not pathetic.

The womaniser believes it “doesn’t look right” when he tries it on with women who are usually half his age.

The “shy” Oscar-winner said: “It’s not so nice when you are 71 and looking for some action.

“I feel uncomfortable doing it in the limelight — so from now on I’ll do it when it’s right.

“Happily, when it comes to girls hitting on me, I’m not undernourished.”

The Sun

Maybe Jack could try and approach women who aren’t half his age?

The good news for Jack is that women still approach him. I’m not sure that the women are as young as they once were, and I suspect his ‘Living Legend of Sex’ title doesn’t do him any favours. Maxim awarded this to Jack, suggesting that he had an impressive 2,000 sexual partners, and at least 6 children by 5 different women. Jack himself has said he could have as many as 9,000 children. Frankly, when a man confesses this, It just makes me want to find the world’s biggest piece of latex and protect him from himself.

Still, Jack gives hope to us all. I like the fact that at 71 he’s still at it, the tiger. We should all be so healthy, and lucky, in our 70s.

Here are some classic images of Jack Nicholson. Thanks to BauerGriffinonline

At least one of these girls is Jack Nicholson’s daughter. Photo from March, 2008 thanks to Splash
I think everyone has had a relationship with a confirmed bachelor, the one who will never, ever get married, but still manages to string you along for a year before moving onto his next girlfriend, despite how sure you were you could change him. It’s why the Mr. Big character in Sex and the City has such appeal. But while Big and Carrie may wind up together (no, I haven’t seen the film, that’s just what I think will happen), in real life usually the guy just keeps on with his bachelor ways.

Case in point: Jack Nicholson is now 71, and still looking for a girlfriend.

Standing in the shower before the Tokyo premiere of his movie “The Bucket List,” Jack Nicholson contemplated his own “bucket list” of last great goals, the three-time Oscar winner said on Wednesday.

Easing tensions between the West and Islam would be a political goal, the actor said, but it was having “one last big love” that topped his list.

“Many of my friends, my own contemporaries, have said in their life that they would like one last big romance to occur, so that would be on my list also,” the 71-year-old performer said.

“I thought in the shower today (that) it’d been many political things I’d like, but of course I’m not in control of that.”

Reuters

Jack has been married once, and has five kids, but I think 40 years of dating (he divorced his only wife in 1968) puts him in the bachelor category. He doesn’t say that he’s looking for a wife, but just romance. I assume that’s the kind of line he feeds the ladies. All 2,000 of them he claims to have bedded.

Is this the future for Hollywood’s other confirmed bachelors? Will we see George Clooney in 30 years, with a big paunch and still looking for a piece of ass?

Jack Nicholson was photographed at the beach with his family in St. Barts yesterday. The Daily Mail says that he’s surrounded by “a bevy of bikini-clad beauties,” but the photo agency says he’s with his family. He has a 26 year-old and a 17 year-old daughter and that might be one or both of them with him.

According to Wikipedia, 70 year-old Nicholson has five children by four different women and was married once in the 1960s.

Nicholson looks like he’s having a grand time on the beach and like he doesn’t give a shit that he’s got a paunch. People age and gain weight, and Hollywood is much more forgiving of old male codgers like Jack than old female codgers like Shirley MacLaine.

Nicholson is campaigning for maybe-doomed Presidential candidate Hilary Clinton. Earlier this month he approved a video endorsement of Clinton featuring clips from his films with themes of leadership like his character’s statement in 1992s A Few Good Men that “There’s nothing sexier than having to salute a woman in the morning.” Clinton’s approval rating has hit a new low following a scandal in which she was exposed as having embellished a 1996 trip to war torn Bosnia. She claimed multiple times to have been under sniper fire and running to a waiting car during that visit, when video shows her chatting with soldiers and children on the tarmac.

Now back to Jack Nicholson, whose statement that he slept with over 2,000 women is also most likely an embellishment. He would probably have more than just five kids if that were true, but in this case it’s hard to prove he’s fibbing.

Thanks to Splash News for these photos.

I don’t like to give Jack Nicholson too much coverage – I don’t care what anyone says, I can’t stand him. He just seems really smarmy, and every time he gives his trademark sneer I want to punch him in the ear. With that said, it seems I have a little more evidence in my “Jack Nicholson is a total wang” argument – he claims he may have fathered as many as 9,000 children. What a potent seed you must have, sir.

Randy Jack Nicholson reckons he could have as many as nine thousand kids. The legendary Lothario has four acknowledged offspring by three women. But Shining star Jack said: “There could be 9,000 for all I know – I used to live so freely.”

Jack, 70 – whose exes include actress Anjelica Houston [sic]– admits calming down with age. He said: “You can’t get too wild these days but I’m as wild as you can get.”

A source said: “He loves women – it’s as simple as that.”

[From the Sun]

Excuse me while I run to the bathroom. I get that he’s being glib when he says he may have 9,000 kids, but it sounds like he’s bragging. And I don’t think potentially fathering a lot of kids that you don’t even know about is something to feel proud of. Even if his boast is more about how many women he’s slept with – he’s still boasting that he’s slept with them in an irresponsible way that could have left them alone with a kid. I’m sure my revulsion to his comments is influenced by my dislike of him in general, but somehow I find calling that behavior “living freely” really selfish.

Of course there is always the good news that Anjelica Huston beat the crap out of him. That image tends to calm me down a little.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Jack Nicholson is shown getting up close and personal with Sally Kellerman, yes Sally Kellerman at Fashion Week on 3/22/06. Apparently she was picking something from his teeth. Here’s a picture of Kellerman since I was curious what she looks like now. She has no connection to Nicholson that I could find apart from attending the Actor’s Studio with him, I just thought these pictures were cute and wanted to show one of her face. Thanks to PRPhotos for these photos.

Jack Nicholson is one of those actors whose appeal I’ve never been able to understand. I think it’s the eyebrows – he has very evil eyebrows. And the sneer. Regardless, the rest of the world seems to think he’s awesome, with the exception of Anjelica Huston. The two were together for fifteen years, until Jack cheated on her in 1989 with actress Rebecca Broussard – who he got pregnant.

I was in a quandary,” Jack quietly explains to PARADE’s Dotson Rader. “I knew having a child was a boon to my life, but I was in a wonderful relationship with Anjelica. It was as good as it gets. I immediately told her what was up, and she made the decision for us.” The public presumed that Nicholson had dumped Huston for Broussard, a younger woman. The truth is the opposite. “Anjelica’s first response was, ‘You have to support this woman,’ ” Nicholson says. “Her second response was to come down to my job and beat the hell out of me. She really beat me up, I tell you. Anjelica can punch! Meanwhile, Rebecca didn’t want me to separate from Anjelica. Well, they both have good taste,” he says laughing.

[From the Huffington Post]

It takes a pretty big man to admit he got beaten up by a woman. Not that I blame her. Physical violence I never okay, but I can understand the anger. Aside from beating the crap out of Jack, it sounds like Huston handled that news in a fairly mature way – she told him to leave and support the mother of his child. Not a lot of women could be so big. Can’t blame her for wanting to hit, though.

Jack also gave an interesting analysis of women. It’s either nonsensical or over my head.

“These issues between men and women are not psychological. Look, remember what a gland is. Most of these are glandular issues. A gland is what allows that mother to lift that truck off a child. Whatever intelligent design is, it’s not going to leave the continuation of the human species up to fashion-crazy, flitting mentalities. It’s in those glands. The infatuation cycle of 18 months hasn’t changed a lot since the monkeys. Look at the numbers. Eighteen months is nine months doubled. A woman’s entire system is set so that when you’re having that procreative act with a woman, you’re dealing with a being whose actual cycle is nine months. It doesn’t have to do with her brain. It has to do with her entire bodily system, which is there to overcome the brain. We don’t legislate this stuff. We don’t out-think it. You cannot change these fundamental things that we are as human beings–but you can adjust to it.”

[From the Huffington Post]

Okay… I’m kind of confused about my glands right now. I wonder what glands Jack is referring to. I have strep throat right now and my lymph glands are swollen – do you think that could factor into my ability to lift a truck off a child right now, if I needed to? Would that make it easier or harder? I’m confused. I was trying to figure out what the hell Jack was talking about, and if he literally meant glands or was using it for some kind of a metaphor that I just can’t understand because it’s three in the morning. Based on the gland thing, Jack Nicholson is either a total moron or incredibly profound.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Anjelica Huston at the Oceana Salutes Former Vice President Al Gore event on October 6th. Header of Jack at designer daughter Jennifer Nicholson’s show at fashion week on March 22. Images thanks to PR Photos.