Jake Gyllenhaal is back on the dating scene, ladies. Are you excited? The last we heard of Jake was the revelation that Taylor Swift’s had written one of her revenge songs, “We’re Never Ever Getting Back Together,” all about him because she was so haunted by the memory of their three months full of ice cream and cuddlefesting. Don’t get too excited though because Jake isn’t exactly an available man even though he’s clearly getting his mojo back. According to Us Weekly, Jake is reportedly seeing a 22-year-old Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit model named Emily DiDonato, whom he met at spinning class in NYC. At least they have a common interest, right? Here’s the story:

Did Jake Gyllenhaal meet his soulmate at SoulCyle? The End of Watch actor has been dating NYC-based model Emily DiDonato, Us Weekly can reveal.

A source tells Us that Gyllenhaal, 32, met the 22-year-old stunner in a spin class at a SoulCycle in Manhattan last fall. The actor and DiDonato (who was featured in Sports Illustrated’s 2013 swimsuit issue) have dated for “a month or two,” adds the insider.

It’s no surprise the star found his sweetie at the chic studio, where he works out weekly whenever he’s in NYC. Says a source, “He’ll hop on the instructor bike. He loves the attention from the girls!”

Gyllenhaal had a brief romance with Minka Kelly last summer. But his last serious relationship was with country singer Taylor Swift, 23, from October 2011 until January that same year.

He also dated his Rendition costar Reese Witherspoon from 2007 to 2009, and actress Kirsten Dunst in 2002 for nearly two years.

[From Us Weekly

Emily's a cute girl with a fantastic body, and you can see her SI: Swimsuit spread here, but she didn't get to do any body paint shots. Let's hope that this girl lasts because Jake has a tendency to wallow in broken-hearted misery every time he gets burned. Like when Minka Kelly rejected him, and he had such a hard time getting over Reese Witherspoon. Not to mention the fact that he probably has to hear that Swifty song every time someone turns on the radio. Poor guy.

Photos courtesy of WENN

Here are some photos of Katie Holmes yesterday (Wednesday) with Suri Cruise on the way to the Music Box Theater in NYC for Katie’s last week of performances in Dead Accounts after the show’s reps announced that it would be closing two months early. Poor Suri is clearly not thrilled with the paparazzi’s intrusion into her newly charmed childhood, but sadly, I don’t see their presence diminishing anytime soon. Unless, of course, a Prince Charming (who will duly block the photogs) enters the scene in short order, which I don’t see happening despite the media’s newfound creation of a fairy tale for Princess Katie.

For certain, this story has all the elements of a Hallmark Valentine’s commercial. That is, we have the classic damsel in distress, Katie Holmes, who has just (in a refreshing twist) rescued herself from the fiery breath of an an evil, lift-wearing dragon, Tom Cruise. Then we have the requisite selfless ex-lover of the damsel, Duke Joshua Jackson, who has been rumored to have been in touch with Katie following the dissolution of her marriage from the evil dragon. As luck would have it, the Duke has a new(er) long-term lady, Duchess Diane Kruger, with whom he is quite satisfied in their mutual (alleged) garden of pleasure. Obviously, the Duke and the Duchess are quite happy together. And the Duke understandably wants to see Katie happy. So it would stand to reason that the Duke might want to set Katie up with a really nice guy? Theoretically, anyway. Enter He Who Cuddlefests, otherwise known as “Jake Gyllenhaal,” who is probably not the Prince:

Katie Holmes is reportedly getting close to End Of Watch star Jake Gyllenhaal.

Grazia magazine claims the pair have been spending plenty of time together, and Katie is rumoured to have enjoyed a cosy dinner date at Jake’s Big Apple apartment.

According to the magazine, Holmes’ former “Dawson’s Creek” co-star Joshua Jackson was behind the blossoming romance, allegedly introducing the pair.

A source told the publication: “Josh has been the mastermind behind this romance.

“Katie says that they have tons in common and Jake has already been to see her in Dead Accounts, plus she has been over to his apartment in the West Village for dinner.”

Holmes parted company with her A-list hubby Tom Cruise earlier this year and has been single since the divorce was finalised in August.

[From MTV

Now I have to admit to sort of wanting to believe this story for a second or two. I mean, it would be great for Katie to end up with a nice dude (possibly a Prince) with no ulterior motives whatsoever. However, Kaiser has duly pointed out to me that Jake has a specific "type" of girl -- that is, the "nice girl." And who in Hollywood circles could possibly be considered "nicer" than Katie Holmes at this point?

As luck (or perhaps common sense) would have it, Katie's rep has shut this rumor down by telling GossipCop that the story is "not at all true." So sadly, Jake must now find a new Princess with which to cuddlefest. Does this (lack of a) resolution make me slightly sad? Sure, but I'm more sad for Jake. Katie will be just fine.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Here are some new photos of Jake Gyllenhaal in NYC on Friday. Does Jake want to tell us something? Did he find a new girlfriend?! I do think the body language between these two is saying “dating/romantic” rather than “just friends”. They’re holding hands! She’s leaning on him! And she’s petite and pretty, which is his type. He’s always had a thing for petite women, I think. This girl looks a bit like Sarah Shahi (who I love!). Us Weekly has a little more:

Is there a new leading lady in Jake Gyllenhaal’s life? The actor was photographed holding hands with a mystery girl while going for a stroll in NYC Friday, Nov. 9. Gyllenhaal, 31, shared a few laughs with the brunette beauty as she held onto his arm.

The “End of Watch” actor is currently performing in the off-Broadway play If There is I Haven’t Found it Yet. Sporting a full, scruffy beard, Gyllenhaal kept warm in a puffy black coat and hat during the walk.

He briefly dated Minka Kelly over the summer, but Gyllenhaal’s last serious relationship was with singer-soongwriter Taylor Swift, 22, from October 2010 until January 2011.

Several songs on Swift’s new album, Red, are rumored to be about her relationship with Gyllenhaal. “She’s haunted by that relationship,” a source told Us Weekly, adding that the actor “totally screwed with her mind.”

[From Us Weekly]

Yeah, no one has the ID on this girl. Gossip Cop claims that he spoke to a source close to Jake and “The woman is NOT the actor’s new girlfriend. A source close to Gyllenhaal tells Gossip Cop that ‘she’s a long-time friend,’ and adds that there’s “nothing romantic there.’” But… but… they’re holding hands! They look couple-y!

Us Weekly is right about one thing, though: Jake has been largely single for the past few years, although I think he was probably trying to find an official girlfriend. There were rumors that Jake tried to get with Olivia Wilde on and off in 2011, and over the summer there were some rumors that Jake and Minka Kelly were briefly an item. I think Isabel Lucas was in there too at some point. But… it seems like Jake never really clicked with any of them for anything longer than a few weeks or a month. I feel like something is going on with him.

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.

I already showed the preview of Taylor Swift’s new video, but she just released the whole thing last week, so here you go. This is her first single off of her newest album, Red. The single is, of course, “We’re Never Ever Getting Back Together”. I thought about doing a second-by-second analysis of the video, as I do from time to time, but honestly… this isn’t worth it. There are too many LOLs and WTFs and OMGs. Swifty has become The Perpetual Thirteen-Year-Old. Even her movements, her air quotes, her “music video acting” is all too cutesy and… like, fake-precocious. We’re supposed to think, “Isn’t she so cute? Isn’t she just the most accessible little thing?” But I’m reading this as bunny-boiling crazy.

But there’s a dude in the video – an actor who looks slightly embarrassed to be there, maybe because he looks like a normal 20-something dude trying to convince a 13-year-old to go out with him as he stands in her stuffed-animal-covered bedroom (when she’s not dancing with members of the Plushie community, no judgement), with Dateline Predator cameras waiting outside. The dude looks a bit like Adam Levine, kind of. Which brings me to the question some have been asking: who is this song about? Most people thought it was about Jake Gyllenhaal. Us Weekly says we’re right:

Taylor Swift is never, ever, ever getting back together with . . . Jake Gyllenhaal. Sources tell Hot Stuff the singer’s latest hit is influenced by her 2010 fling with the actor, 31.

“It’s definitely about Jake,” an insider says. In “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” she sings about an ex who comes back to say, “Baby, I miss you and I swear I’m gonna change.”

(Gyllenhaal flew to Nashville three weeks after their split to attempt a reunion.)

Swift has been dropping hints too: The song’s video features an actor who resembles Gyllenhaal, and in a promo clip for the September 6 MTV Video Music Awards, she jokes about the hit with host Kevin Hart, who pastes his own face on a photo of the then-couple.

Despite her past dramas, Swift, 22, is pushing forward with new love Conor Kennedy, 18. She’s even lining up promotion for her CD Red (out October 22) with the Deerfield Academy senior’s schedule. Adds the insider, “She’s working around his school holidays!”

[From Us Weekly]

When you’re 22 years old, male or female, you need to never, ever utter the line, “I’m working around their high school holidays!” Because OH MY GOD SWIFTY STOP.

As for the Jake thing – go back and watch the video again with the knowledge that it’s definitely about Jake. That fact makes it even funnier, hand to God.

Photos courtesy of Us Weekly, WENN.

I sometimes think Jake Gyllenhaal can veer too hard into the “sensitive poet-boy who will cry if you break him” vibe. Years ago, I thought he had the potential to be a very versatile actor, but after seeing him try and fail (IMO) at some action films, I see that he should just stick to his wheelhouse: dramas and romantic comedies. There’s nothing wrong with that. But Jake limits his options every time he poses for a photo shoot like this one – he’s the cover boy for the September issue of Details Mag. It’s a lovely black-and-white shoot, and Jake looks good. I like his beard – it suits him much more than the shaved head he was sporting last year (which was for a role, for full disclosure). But the vibe is very “I’m a sensitive dude, I could weep at any moment.” There’s nothing wrong with sensitive dudes. But – once again, just my opinion – there is something wrong with dudes who seem so “fragile”. I feel the same way about women too – Jake reminds me of Michelle Williams here. I mean, look at the cover! Jake looks like he’s about to burst into tears. Sack up, dude.

As for the interview… uh… Jake is “in character” (sort of) throughout the piece, and I really didn’t care enough to try to work out exactly what his character was supposed to be. Jake agreed to the cover because he’s promoting End of Watch, the film where he shaved his head and played an LA cop, along side Michael C. Pena. You can read the full Details piece here, and here are some highlights:

Jake on exercise: “I haven’t cycled in a long time… I don’t run anymore. Do I take care of my body and take conditioning seriously? Yes. But exercising regularly doesn’t fit the energy of the character I’m playing now.”

He wants something “real”: “My whole life,” he says, “I’d come to a scene and just ask for something real. I’d say, ‘Please, just tell me what’s going on. All the research, how your character picks up a fork, it’ll all come when we know the truth.’ Now the time’s come to turn that on myself”—searching, over and over, for the truth—”and it’s ‘Game on.’”

Fear: “Every journey starts with fear,” he says. “And I could say that’s what I want to embrace now. A real experience. Connection with the people I’m working with, so I’m helping them make something. And I want, overall, to trust what I know is right. There have been many times when I haven’t. If that’s what you asked, it’s what I’m asking myself now: Where is the line? What is the line? There’s so much context, it can be almost impossible to find. It comes down to finding the beating heart of a story—what’s this really about?—then remaining true to instinct in telling that story.” He looks straight at me—no, through me. “And I just had a déjà vu,” he says, tearing into his fried chicken.

Success: “What success really gives you is the freedom to fail and then try again,” he says.

Something: “I grew up on the other side of the camera,” Gyllenhaal says. “And yes, I do love making movies as much as being in them. I love actors, watching what they do, and I do love acting off-camera, and how it helps tell the story. But the camera eventually does turn to you, and then it’s a very different question. I don’t know if I have the answer to it yet.”

[From Details]

I understand all of the words, but it still feels like Jake is speaking in New Age-speak riddles. He enjoys fear. He’s looking for realness. He asks the questions. He needs The Truth. He is The Philosopher-Actor. And maybe he was just “in character” for a very “meta” film, or maybe Jake is just… kind of up his own ass, right?

Photos courtesy of Details.

By most accounts, Minka Kelly is hot stuff. I think she’s a really pretty girl, and I dig her interviews (her mom was a crazy stripper), and I want her to date some interesting, challenging, smart dudes. Instead, she was with Derek Jeter off-and-on for years, and then jumped from Jeter to Wilmer Valderrama of all people. CB gives Wilmer more of a break – I always think of him as a Celebrity Dateline Predator. He’s so gross and sleazy. Anyway, you could kind of tell that Minka was ashamed of Wilmer, and she even tried to half-heartedly deny it, but they were together for several (gross) months. Now Us Weekly claims that Wilmer and Minka are totally over, and she tried giving a certified Nice Guy a chance. It didn’t work out:

Persistence paid off for Jake Gyllenhaal – at least for a while. The actor recently had some dates with his crush Minka Kelly, who had turned him down COLD when he first asked her out last fall.

“Minka wasn’t into Jake when he first pursued her,” says a mutual pal of the actor, 31, and Minka, 32.

Instead, Minka spent the winter romancing serial dater Wilmer Valderrama, 32. But when that affair fizzled in late April, says the friend, Kelly “decided to give Jake another chance.”

Alas, the spark never quite caught fire, says a second source. “It was never serious, and it’s over now.”

[From Us Weekly, print edition]

Yeah, I’m pretty sure that Jake Gyllenhaal pulled out his Cuddlefesting & Apple-Picking Contract on the first date, and Minka just wasn’t having it. Still, if I was given a flat-out, either/or choice between making out with heterosexual pervert Wilmer or fake-dating Jake, I would totally choose to fake-date Jake. I like fresh apples, and I don’t mind the occasional cuddlefest. Wilmer is just THAT hideous to me. So… who should we imaginarily set Minka up with now? I wouldn’t mind seeing her with Ryan Gosling, should Eva Mendes ever release the Gosdong back into the wild.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

These are photos of Jake Gyllenhaal from two nights ago, at a benefit for the late Paul Newman’s A Hole In The Wall Camps. Jake is really letting his beard grow out, isn’t he? I mean, it looks trimmed and everything, but this boy can really grow some burly facial hair. And the big beard makes his blue eyes stand out even more, which is nice. Jake has pretty eyes. Anyway, I read this funny little item about Jake this morning, and I just had to share it:

Jake Gyllenhaal has been turning heads — or “spinning” them — by popping up on the “instructor’s bike” at SoulCycle in Union Square. The “Source Code” star cycled on a stage next to an instructor Monday in full view of an afternoon spin class.

He even mouthed the words to a Jay-Z song playing on the soundtrack while wearing “a black tank top, shorts and full beard dripping in sweat,” a spy said, adding Jake even lip-synced, “I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one.”

[From Page Six]

Does that make you like Jake more? I like him more, knowing that he loves a good spin class and he knows the words to Jay-Z songs. I’ve been listening to Jay-Z and Kanye’s “N—gas in Paris” while I work out, but I make a concerted effort to not mouth the words. Because… well, people might get offended. But this bitch isn’t offended that Jake has 99 problems and a bitch ain’t one. What would you do if Jake showed up in your spin class?

One more Jake story – Ellen Pompeo recently told a story about Jake hitting on her before they were famous. The problem is that she’s told this story several times, because I distinctly remember the line Ellen claims Jake used on her: “He told me I was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.” Um… I’m not putting that on Ellen. That’s Jake’s line. And it’s cheesy as hell.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

I’ve been thinking about Jake Gyllenhaal for most of this week. Ever since Reese Witherspoon announced her pregnancy, in fact. Remember Jake and Reese? They were so cute. Almost too cute to believe. I can’t believe they managed to stick it out for… something like two years, right? Jake was the first dude Reese dated after her divorce from Ryan Phillippe (Jim Toth was the second!), and it’s widely believed that Reese dumped Jake when the time came. Allegedly, Jake was devastated. He had grown close to Ava and Deacon, and people said Jake really thought Reese was “the one”. Their split happened more than two years ago…and what has happened since?

Reese rebounded immediately with Jim Toth, and they got serious very quickly. Engaged within a year, married and now expecting their first child together. Jake dated Taylor Swift for a few months (cuddlefesting!) and maybe Olivia Wilde for a hot minute. Oh, he tried to get with Minka Kelly, Rashida Jones and Anna Kendrick too, I think. I haven’t heard of Jake associated with a lady in a while, though. So… is Jake still hung up on Reese? Can he simply not will himself to love like that again? OK, now I’m just making myself laugh.

She broke his heart and dumped him two years ago, but Reese Witherspoon still makes the cut with Jake Gyllenhaal – before he reads any magazine or newspaper, an assistant rips or snips out every last photo of Reese because he’s still torching… and simply can’t bear to see her face!

Said a family friend: “You’d think he’s be over it by now, especially since he’s dated many beauties like Taylor Swift, and Reese is now married. But Jake can’t bring himself to look at her photo – and absolutely refuses to see her movies. So before any publications are given to him, Reese stories or pictures are RIPPED! Even if it’s just a photo with a small caption, his assistant clips it out with scissors!”

[From The Enquirer, print edition]

OMG! It’s such a vicious cycle. Jake is tormented by images of his long-lost lover, Reese, so he tries to blot out any memory of her. Meanwhile, his cuddlefesting love, Taylor Swift, is haunted by their time together – time that Jake only spent thinking of long-lost Reese. EPIC.

PS… Who else read Lainey’s blind item and thought “Dimples” was Jake? Right?

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.

Taylor Swift has been in London this week – and she’ll be there for months, I believe, as Tom Hooper’s Les Misérables begins production soon. So Swifty arrived in London early to do some photo ops around town, looking sad and winsome, of course. Swifty will be playing Eponine in the production, which… sure. I don’t have a strong opinion on, honestly. Les Misérables is one of my least favorite musicals/books/whatever, so it’s not like I’m even going to see the movie when it comes out. I’m including a photo of Swifty at the London Zoo, and lots of pics from Swifty’s forlorn trip to (no joke) the Diana Memorial. She looked weepy in the rain, she stared at some swans. It was all very intense.

Also intense? Swifty’s love life, of course, but if her Vogue Magazine interview was any indication, I don’t think she’s as bad off as people think. Swifty’s Vogue article was surprisingly good, especially when she talked about boys and her latest dating rules. But that Vogue piece was the jump-off point for some “sources” to go to Us Weekly and talk about how Swifty is still very much screwed up over Jake Gyllenhaal! OMG JAYLOR.

One year later, Taylor Swift is still smarting from her split with Jake Gyllenhaal. “It was earth-shattering,” Swift told Vogue about the end of her three-month romance with the actor, 31. Adds a Swift source, “She’s haunted by that relationship. He totally screwed with her mind.”

Indeed, she’s been having a hard time moving on: “She doesn’t know hot to meet anybody new.”

As least there’s a bright side – Swift is once again using heartache as inspiration. “The songs on her next album are intimate and revealing,” says another source, confirming, “Some are about Jake.”

[From Us Weekly, print edition]

“He totally screwed with her mind.” Of course he did! She was 20 years old, dating a man a decade older who actively did NOT want to do anything but go apple-picking and have the occasional “clothes on” cuddlefest. And then he dumped her over the phone. Admit it, you would be screwed up about it too. As for the Jake songs… I can’t wait.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

I don’t know why this story is so funny to me today. Maybe it’s because we haven’t had a good Jake Gyllenhaal story in a while. He’s been MIA for months – you could blame the Taylor Swift debacle, but really, he disappeared after Source Code faltered at the box office. People just don’t buy “butch” Jake. Put Jake in a romantic comedy, or even a straight-up drama, and Jake is more believable. But people just have issues with Jake as an action hero. I’m one of them. Anyway, Jake hasn’t had a celebrity girlfriend since Taylor Swift. Maybe he got burned by all of the cuddlefesting. Whatever it was, he kept his head down for the most part, although there were some rumors about Olivia Wilde, right? But she was allegedly hooking up with EVERYONE in 2011. So, what’s Jake’s type these days? Wispy, girlish singers? Or kick-ass brunettes?

Jake Gyllenhaal tried — and failed! — to add Minka Kelly to his little black book.

In the new issue of Us Weekly (on stands Friday), a source claims that Kelly, 31, “declined” an invitation from Gyllenhaal, 31, when he asked her on a date last fall.

But it wasn’t because the Source Code actor didn’t measure up: at the time, the Charlie’s Angels star had split with her on-and-off beau, Derek Jeter, 37, and “was trying to patch things up,” the source explains.

Kelly’s willpower paid off: she reconciled with the New York Yankees player in December.

[From Us Weekly]

I think the same thing about this that I thought of Olivia Wilde’s divorce, and Jennifer Aniston’s love life, and pretty much the hookups of all of Young Hollywood – celebrity women are faced with slim pickings when they look around LA for a boyfriend. I think it surprised Olivia Wilde, just how few dudes really were interested in her. As for Minka – well, if you were faced with the choice between Jake and Derek Jeter, what would you do? Ugh, for me it would be “neither.” But I still find it funny that Jake struck out with Minka. Poor, lonely Jake.

Photos courtesy of Fame, WENN.