Jessica Alba isn’t one of my favorite celebrities, but I like her a hell of a lot more after she said exactly what she thinks about Bill O’Reilly. On Sunday night she was at the Declare Yourself ‘A New Birth of Citizenship’ Inauguration kick-off event, where some Fox News goons came up to her and started prattling on about republicans and Fox and former President Bush.

Alba was clearly trying to be polite when they asked her if she had any words for Bush, to which she replied “Goodbye!” with a huge grin on her face. But then they decided to push her even more and asked Alba if she had any words for Bill O’Reilly. And then she called him an a-hole, and all was right with the world.

Jessica Alba, attending one of the Inaugural shindigs, was the victim of one of those Fox News ambush crews that wanders events where liberals are numerous and tries to get them to say something dumb so Bill O’Reilly can make fun of them later. She told them exactly what she thinks of Bill O’Reilly.

Reporter: Bill O’Reilly says hi. You wanna give him a Factor Inauguration Shout Out?

Alba: No. He’s kind of — [Laughs] He’s kind of an a-hole.

As is their SOP, the crew badgered her to give examples. (Examples? You want examples? We gotcher examples right here, dude.) And she was smart enough not to take the bait:

Reporter: How so?

Alba: I don’t know how he does it. I guess he was just born that way, for some reason.

Reporter: Can you give me an example? Come on.

Alba: No, because that means admitting that I actually have watched Fox.

Of course, O’Reilly showed off this clip proudly and smugly, no doubt to show his audience how “nasty” those Hollywood liberals are. Not that any of them have ever been caught wishing publicly for a terrorist attack on San Francisco, but hey. Nasty is in the eye of the media-megaphone holder.

[From Crooks and Liars]

Good for her. O’Reilly, of course, showed the clip and tried to act all smug and superior about it, though it was unclear what he felt smug and superior about. An actress hates you… as do a lot of people… and you’re right and better than everyone else how? It definitely wasn’t one of O’Reilly’s better arguments. But kudos to Jessica for saying what she thought. And when you watch the video, she actually said it quite nicely, everything considered.

Thanks to TMZ for the story idea.

Here’s Jessica at the Declare Yourself ‘A New Birth of Citizenship’ Inauguration kick-off event in Washington DC on Sunday. Images thanks to WENN.

Jessica Alba is gorgeous and super-fit on an average day, but she’s far from all natural on the pages of the upcoming Campari calendar. As the Daily Mail points out, you can tell that there’s some substantial airbrushing going on when you compare photos from the shoot that day with the final product. Alba’s hips were made even more slender, her waist and stomach were smoothed and her boobs were made more buoyant. We all know it happens, but it’s still interesting to see perfectly gorgeous photos get enhanced to the point of Disney level perfection.

Here are the photos, shot by Mario Testino via Superior pics.

Jessica Alba graces every month of the new Campari calendar, posing seductively in black evening gowns and bathing suits while clutching the apertif. Looking like a 40s pinup with a considerable buzz, Alba is surrounded by interchangeable dark-haired admirers who seem ready to pounce once she gets drunk enough. Given her acting abilities I would guess that her half-lidded look can be attributed to sipping the props for the photo shoot.

Alba, 27, has a six month old daughter, Honor Marie Warren, and says her life at home is less than glamorous:

Jessica Alba shows off her body-after-baby in the 2009 Campari calendar, and PEOPLE has a sneak peek of the pictures that the actress says allowed her “play out this sort of bombshell.”

“I’m usually walking around in comfy clothes, with a baby on my arm,” says Alba, 27, who welcomed daughter Honor Marie Warren in June, “and it’s nice to dress things up and feel sophisticated, sexy, and surrounded by so much beauty.”

Campari is printing only 9,999 copies of the calendar featuring photos of Alba in swimsuits, high heels and evening wear. The calendar will be distributed at the end of the year.

[From People.com]

The photos, shown below, are shot by famed Peruvian photographer Mario Testino, who has worked with many celebrities, fashion houses and high-end magazines throughout his career. Alba does look beautiful and classy in a wasted kind of way.

If you’ve been wondering what new mom Jessica Alba has been up to since giving birth – aside from glowering at paparazzi and posing on the red carpet – the actress has just completed an environmentally-conscious renovation of her L.A. home. Just was does such a renovation entail? Mostly recycled materials and non-toxic paint. Alba and her husband, Cash Warren, made an extra effort to keep things green for the sake of their daughter, five-month-old Honor, and their dogs.

For Jessica Alba, motherhood means eco-friendly living – and plenty of couch-jumping.

“It’s kid-friendly, animal-friendly,” the actress, 27, tells In Style magazine of the newly renovated L.A. canyon home she shares with husband Cash Warren and their 5-month-old daughter Honor Marie.

“You can jump on the sofas, walk around barefoot,” she says in the magazine’s November issue. “There’s nothing off-limits here.”

By using nontoxic paints and recycled furniture, the new parents – whose family also includes three dogs – pulled off an environmentally friendly renovation.

“The energy here is so inviting – it is open and playful,” says Alba. “And everywhere you look, inside and out, you get to see a part of nature.”

As for how Warren, 29, contributes to the new house, Alba says, “he’s pretty organized for a dude.”

[From People]

We’re in the middle of a renovation project on our new home, and I’m loving the non-toxic paints we chose. They’re a little more expensive than regular paint, but there are no fumes- a big deal for me, since I’m expecting. I can even have my kids help out with the painting without worry. If we had more of a budget, I would have opted for green building materials too – but those are big bucks. Anyway, it sounds like Jessica and her husband had a good time with this project, and it probably came out a lot better than her last movie – that Mike Meyers stinker, “Love Guru.” Maybe if her career doesn’t work out she can become an environmentally-friendly interior decorator.

Jessica Alba and Cash Warren are shown at a screening of Filth and Wisdom on 10/13/08. Credit: Bauergriffinonline

Jessica Alba has shown that she’s more than willing to become the poster girl for sadomasochism if it will somehow provoke people to vote. In her latest ad for Declare Yourself, it seems like all she’s doing is getting people to scratch their heads, though.

Alba wears a mask that’s reminiscent of fictional serial killer Hannibal Lecter’s famous facewear in Silence of The Lambs. There are nails running through the front of the flesh-colored muzzle, but fortunately they’re not under her skin – like the other ads featuring Christina Aguilera with her mouth sewed shut and a tear running down her face. The ads are captioned “only you can silence yourself.”

Some photos, like the one of Aguilera above, were taken by famed celebrity photo artist Dave LaChappelle while the latest Alba ad is from Mark Liddell. I guess they’re trying to get attention to a worthy cause – and it’s working.

There’s still time to register to vote in this year’s US Presidential election if you haven’t yet. Ironically, when I was viewing the Declare Yourself site it went down, probably because of all the people wanting to see poor Jessica Alba in that S&M fantasy pic. You can register to vote on either Declare Yourself or Rock The Vote. If you’re not registered yet you have time because the first deadlines for specific states start this weekend. Do it now or Alba gets it. (I didn’t come up with that, I read it somewhere else first.)

It wasn’t surprising that Paris Hilton would give you viruses, we expected that, but now Brad Pitt is more apt to crash your hard drive.  McAfee has released a list of names entered into a search engine that are most likely to lead you to malware-hosted sites.  While the main culprit was Hilton last year, she doesn’t even make the top ten this year.  Pitt, however, will get you a one in five chance of internet infestation.

The top ten bad-news names from one to ten are Pitt, Beyonce, Justin Timberlake, Heidi Montag, Mariah Carey, Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan, Cameron Diaz, George Clooney and, surprise, Angelina Jolie. 

If you’ve never heard of some of these people then it’s a fair bet that you are not the intended target of a technique that has been for some years one of the commonest ways to infect a PC. But still it persists, driven by an apparently insatiable appetite among some Internet users for computer screensavers, wallpaper, ring tones and star pictures, at whatever risk to themselves.

“Cybercriminals employ numerous methods, yet one of the simplest but most effective way is to trick consumers into infecting themselves by capitalizing on Americans’ interest in celebrity gossip,” commented McAfee’s Jeff Green. “Tapping into current events, pop culture or commonly browsed sites is an easy way to achieve this.”

[InfoWorld.com]

While it goes without saying that it’s always a wise move to make sure you’re protected, McAfee isn’t completely altruistic in letting us in on this valuable little morsel of information.  Besides being the first name in malware protection you’ll think of after reading their own study, McAfee has a SiteAdvisor tool for search engines to weed out these fake sites and Yahoo! has recently started using it.  It makes them a pretty penny and it makes us all a little more aware, so I’ll give it it’s due.

Speaking of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, so you don’t have to go searching, once again reps of the couple have had to make a statement refuting rumors they have split.  Sparked by the nonexistence of photos of the happily unmarried parents of six since their twins were born two months ago, reports reached the couple’s representatives via the internet that Brangelina were no longer.  Hard-hitting television news magazine Entertainment Tonight got the real scoop.

Despite the rumors swirling around the Internet that power couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have split, ET gets to the bottom of the story.

Angelina’s rep tells ET the reports are “absolutely not true.”

[Entertainment Tonight via MSN Entertainment]

To put an exclamation point on the denial of trouble in paradise, Us Magazine says a source tells them that the whole family had a 10am breakfast together outside the French chateau they’re living in on Thursday morning.  You can’t argue with breakfast, ladies and gentlemen.

Brad Pitt is shown at the Burn After Reading premiere on 8/27/08. Credit: Solarpix / PR Photos

It’s pretty simple to lose weight – in theory. If you eat less calories than you take in and exercise you’ll shed the pounds. In practice it’s hard to trick ourselves into following any kind of diet or fitness regimen if we’re not used to it, and that’s where the products, diets, and fitness gimmicks come in. When I want to lose weight I have to have a concrete way to do it and a kind of formula to follow in order to remind me how to eat and work out. For me it’s something I do alone with a plan, but other people lose weight using groups, fitness buddies and support systems. To succeed in lasting weight loss, you have to find what’s right for you given your personality and what will motivate you to stick with it.

Many people scoff at celebrities losing weight because they have so much help. There’s someone planning their workouts and getting paid big bucks to make sure they exercise, and they might have a chef cooking their meals for them. They have the time too, because there’s someone to watch their kids, someone to clean their house, and another person to pick up their groceries and dry cleaning. We’re still interested to learn how they did it, even if the level of support they have is unattainable to most of us.

Britney Spears said she lost weight through diet and exercise. She eats around 1,200 calories a day and works out hard. Britney graces the cover of OK! Magazine, and they quote an expert who says you can lose around 12 pounds in 30 days with her plan:

“I’m the healthiest I’ve been all my life,” Britney, 26, tells OK!. “My diet has a lot to do with my getting into shape. I have no sugar. I don’t eat fruit or even fruit juice because of the sugar. I eat chicken and salmon and rice. I eat avocados. I’ll have egg whites for breakfast and sometimes turkey burgers for lunch. I try to do just 1,200 calories a day. It may sound like it’s not much, but it’s actually a lot of food if you eat the right things.”

Of course, Brit also hits the gym on a regular basis, doing “lots of cardio and weights” five days a week.

The singer’s comittment to being healthy is applauded by trainers like Miami-based trainer and owner of SOMA Fitness & Performance, Adam Cronin. Cronin, who has not worked with the pop star, says Britney’s routine of following a 1,200-calorie-a-day, high-protein meal plan is ideal for someone who wants to drop pounds in a safe, healthy way.

“If you follow a vigorous workout program — plus this eating program — it is possible to lose up to 12 pounds in 30 days, in a very healthy, non fad-like way,” Adam tells OK!.

[From OK! Magazine]

Jessica Alba quickly lost 25 pounds of baby weight with a low-carb diet and by busting her butt with exercise six times of week, much of it at home with her trainer in order to stay close to her two and half month-old.

Just two months after giving birth to daughter Honor Marie, Jessica Alba is 25 lbs. lighter – and her trainer is telling PEOPLE just how she did it.

“Jessica went from a size 8 to a size 4 pretty quickly,” says Alba’s longtime trainer Ramona Braganza. The actress – who flaunted her post-baby body at the ALMA Awards on Aug. 17 – has been opting for a low-fat, low-carb diet as part of Braganza’s 321 Baby Bulge Be Gone plan.

She has been sweating, too: With an elliptical machine and treadmill at home, Alba, 27, has resumed her routine of core exercises, cardio and circuit training.

“The baby always comes first, but Jessica definitely set goals for herself,” says Braganza, who now trains Alba six days a week.

And having a workout buddy helped. “She loves working out with a girlfriend,” says Braganza, whose client, actress Jamie King, frequently trains with Alba.

[From People.com]

Good for Britney and Jessica for losing weight and doing it sensibly. They’re not starving like Madonna’s trainer recommends or only subsisting on weird maple syrup and cayenne pepper drinks like Beyonce said helped her lose a dangerous 20 pounds in two weeks. They’re still making the rest of us moms look bad – the ones who work 8 hours a day, have childcare that’s not always reliable, have to cook dinner, do the laundry, clean the house and squeeze in time for a workout. Who am I kidding, though, I only have one kid and I work from home. My life is practically stress free compared to a lot of you with several children to care for – whether you stay at home or not. If you manage to stay fit and balance all that at once you deserve a medal. Hell you deserve a medal for just getting through the day.

Jessica Alba and her five week old baby, Honor, appear on the cover of this week’s OK! Magazine. In the accompanying interview Alba talks about her birth experience, calling it “zen,” and says she didn’t scream and was calm the whole time. She also calls her baby a “miracle” and talks of her in spiritual terms, saying it’s like “she’s connected to the other world.” That’s poetic and I wouldn’t expect to hear that from her. Alba has started gradually exercising to shed the baby weight, and says she’s “doing it slow” and trying to eat healthy.

“I didn’t scream,” Jessica tells OK! in an exclusive interview and photoshoot. “It was really Zen.” And Cash could only marvel at his wife’s quiet strength when she gave birth. “She didn’t make a sound,” he says. “It was amazing.”

Here, the proud pair open their door exclusively to OK!, introducing the adorable Honor Marie Warren.

“It hasn’t totally sunk in,” Jessica reveals to OK!. “She dreams, she smiles, and coos and does all these things, but she hasn’t seen enough of the world yet to understand any of that stuff. So I still feel like she’s connected to the other world, or something. There’s no other way to explain it. It’s a miracle.”

The Love Guru star tells OK! that she had natural birth. “The labor was more like meditation,” she says. “I did yoga breathing. I was focused.”

Jessica, who tells OK! she ate “a lot of soul food” in the weeks following Honor’s birth, says she’s just now starting to shed the pregnancy pounds.

“I started working out last Thursday, but for 20 minutes. I do cardio on my own. I’m doing it slow,” she says. “Now I’m starting to eat more healthy. Because after working out, having fried chicken and mashed potatoes is a little counteractive.”

So who does Honor look more like?

“She looks like a girl version of me,” Cash says. “She has my nose, my eyebrows and my…”

“Forehead and dimples,” Jessica finishes, adding, “She has my mouth when I was a baby. And my ears.”

“Maybe Honor is a mixture,” Cash reconsiders. “I want her to look like me, because a daughter looking like Jessica, I’d kill myself!”

[From OK! Magazine]

That’s cute that Cash says he’d be upset if their daughter is too beautiful. He doesn’t have a lot of say in the matter, and their baby sure is cute.

In Touch reports this week that Alba is working hard to lose weight so that she can be fit for a second larger wedding celebration with Cash. Jessica has reportedly lost 15 pounds but wants to get slimmer before they have a big party. The two were married in late May at the Beverly Hills courthouse and they didn’t even release a photo. Alba was said to have been reluctant to sell her baby’s first public pictures, but was eventually convinced by OK!, which reportedly paid $1.5 million for the photoshoot and another set of photos of one of Honor’s holidays. I hope it’s Halloween and they dress her up all cute.

Jessica Alba on 1/26/08. Credit: L. Gallo / WENN
The higher up you are on the celebrity pecking order and the more babies you have, the more money the photos will fetch from the glossies. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are said to be commanding at least $16 million for the first photos of their twins, due sometime this month. Matthew McConaughey just signed a $3 million deal with OK! Magazine for pictures of his newborn son, Levi, and Jamie Lynn Spears got around $1 million from OK! for the exclusive story of her pregnancy at 16 and the first photos of the baby.

Jessica Alba’s baby pictures fetched a respectable $1.5 million from OK! The photos were taken this week, according to TMZ, and should come out soon:

TMZ has learned Honor Marie Warren, celebuspawn of Jessica Alba and hubby Cash Warren, is now $1.5 million richer thanks to OK! Magazine.

We’re hearing the two-part deal consists of pictures of the baby now, and one other “event” — Christmas, Thanksgiving, vacation, etc. Our spy said Jessica initially turned down the offers of several weekly mags, not wanting to sell, but eventually caved.

Two-month-old Honor, we’re told, is just “adorable” and the pictures, taken this week, are “so cute.”

[From TMZ]

Celebrities who seem to have made the conscious decision not to sell photos of their children include Naomi Watts, Halle Berry, and Salma Hayek. In fact not even the paparazzi have photographed Halle’s four month old Nahla. Watts willingly showed her then-newborn, Alexander, to photographers trailing her last summer. Salma Hayek released a lovely posed photo with baby Valentina, taken by the Associated Press with no pricetag associated with it that I could tell.

On our post about the whopping $16 million bidding price for the first Brangelina twin photos, commenter Anastasia mentioned that Brad and Angelina are probably trying to do what they think is best for their children by controlling the photos and keeping the paparazzi partially at bay. She said “If they don’t do this, the paps will be practically killing people to get pictures of these babies and will probably no doubt endanger people for real to get the pics, because they can fetch a high price.”

That’s definitely true for the Brangelina twins, and maybe for the other celebrity babies as well. Alba lives in LA and she’s followed everywhere, so it could be a real concern for her.

Still it seems so much more noble just to stay at home with the little one and not bother with all the press. Save the photos and stories for your friends and family. I want to see the stars’ baby photos though, and I love to read the stories. If the celebrities want the publicity they may as well cash in.

Critics say that “The Love Guru,” Mike Myers’ asinine riff on new age spiritualism, is so bad and so soul-sucking that it’s hard to even describe how awful a movie-going experience it is. Reviewers at The NY Times, Slate, and other outlets say they’re at a loss to explain how truly awful it is and how uncomfortable, angry and depressed they were after sitting through it. While Austin Powers was arguably funny, Myers’ first film in 5 years just falls flat, digs a hole, craps in it, and expects you to think it’s funny.

Slate: “the most joy-draining 88 minutes I’ve ever spent outside a hospital waiting room”

There are good movies. There are bad movies. There are movies so bad they’re good (though, strangely, not the reverse). And once in a while there is a movie so bad that it takes you to a place beyond good and evil and abandons you there, shivering and alone. Watching The Love Guru (Paramount Pictures) is a spiritual experience of a sort, but not the sort that its creator and star, Mike Myers, intended. This tale of a guru who brings joy to all who meet him is the most joy-draining 88 minutes I’ve ever spent outside a hospital waiting room. In the course of those long minutes, Myers leads you on a journey deep inside himself, to the source from whence his comedy springs—and it’s about as much fun as a tour of someone’s large intestine.

[From Slate]

NY Times: it will “make you wonder if you will ever laugh again”

Which might sum up “The Love Guru” in its entirety but only at the risk of grievously understating the movie’s awfulness. A whole new vocabulary seems to be required. To say that the movie is not funny is merely to affirm the obvious. The word “unfunny” surely applies to Mr. Myers’s obnoxious attempts to find mirth in physical and cultural differences but does not quite capture the strenuous unpleasantness of his performance. No, “The Love Guru” is downright antifunny, an experience that makes you wonder if you will ever laugh again.

[From The NY Times]

Video Hound: “the kind of cultural and comedic offense that audiences should demand retribution after seeing.”

Someone needs to be punished. The Love Guru isn’t just your average bad movie. Smoothly limbo-ing below already low expectations, this “alleged” comedy is the kind of cultural and comedic offense that audiences should demand retribution after seeing. And just giving them back their money won’t do. Mike Myers and Jessica Alba are the main cinematic war criminals in question here, but they’ll probably get away with this disaster and move on unscathed to commit more comedic terrorism. Justin Timberlake is bulletproof, but poor Romany Malco and Meagan Good should be worried. Of course, they’re not to blame. Every single flaw of The Love Guru falls at the feet of the once-talented, but clearly now completely delusional, Mike Myers. This week’s Entertainment Weekly contains a shockingly harsh article about Myers that inspired me to think that he must have been a total prick when the mag interviewed him back in April. Why else would they run such a negative piece about a movie the week of its release? Now I know. They saw the movie and, like me, they’re angry.

[From Video Hound]

Chicago Sun Times, Roger Ebert: “a dreary experience”

Myers has made some funny movies, but this film could have been written on toilet walls by callow adolescents. Every reference to a human sex organ or process of defecation is not automatically funny simply because it is naughty, but Myers seems to labor under that delusion. He acts as if he’s getting away with something, but in fact all he’s getting away with is selling tickets to a dreary experience.

[From Chicago Sun Times]

There’s one character who is getting praise – critics say Justin Timberlake’s cameo as a French Canadian hockey player is pretty funny, but in no way worth sitting through even ten minutes more of the movie.

The Love Guru is up against Get Smart for opening weekend winner at the box office. Love Guru currently has a 15% aggregate critic’s rating on Rotten Tomatoes while Get Smart, with Steve Carrell and Anne Hathaway, has a more respectable 52%. Neither is a great film, but one is clearly more awful.

Stills below are from The Love Guru thanks to All Movie Photo. Thanks to The Huffington Post for the idea for this article.

Here are the trailers for The Love Guru and Get Smart

Love Guru

Get Smart