Back in November of last year, we got our first look at the OTHER Snow White movie, the one NOT starring Kristen Stewart and Charlize Theron. This one is called Mirror, Mirror, and Julia Roberts is the Evil Queen and Lily Collins (daughter of Phil) is Snow White. The first trailer was just awful – Julia is cackling away, seeming to aim for… camp, I think. Armie Hammer as the prince was the only highlight, just because he already looks like a cartoon prince.

But the film falls on the unsteady shoulders of Lily Collins, and dear God, I feel bad for this girl. She might be a fine actress – sure. But she was utterly miscast as Snow White. She’s an attractive girl, but Snow White is supposed to be beautiful, and considering how many references there are to Snow White versus the Queen’s comparative beauties, you’d think they would have gone with someone less… hairy? There’s just a grooming problem. And she looks so young, it’s kind of gross to see her with Armie Hammer.

Anyway, there’s a new international trailer, and if possible, it’s even worse than the first one. The first (domestic) trailer was more Julia Roberts-centric, and in this one, we’re seeing more of Snow White and the dwarves. It’s just… awful. Why was this poor girl cast as Snow White?!?!?

‘Mirror, Mirror’ stills, courtesy of various sources.

The first trailer for Mirror, Mirror is out – that’s the Snow White film starring Lily Collins as Snow and Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen – we bitched about the production stills a few weeks ago. First, let me just say that I do think Lily Collins is a pretty little girl. She is! And don’t start yelling about how she looks, for real. But, I have two big problems with Lily Collins as Snow White. One, she was simply miscast. Lily Collins looks like a 14-year-old mall girl – a pretty mall girl, but now really “the fairest of them all”. Secondly, HER BROWS. Did all of the production costs go to busted costumes and Julia Roberts’ paycheck and NO ONE could afford a pair of tweezers? It is absolutely ridiculous to me that no one thought to tweeze Lily’s brows. They’re so unruly, it’s distracting, and I swear she has a unibrow in some scenes. OK, here’s the trailer:

Much like Snow White and the Huntsman, it seems like the Evil Queen is the star of this bitch, and that’s how Julia is playing it. Unfortunately for Julia, Charlize Theron now kind of owns the Evil Queen, right? What else? The costumes look even worse in the trailer than in the stills – I guess the vibe is supposed to be “live-action cartoon” and comedy. You know who I thought was rather cute? Armie Hammer. He looks completely unsuited for both Julia and Lily, though. Seeing him get all starry eyed for Hairy McUnibrow is unsettling. Poor Armie.

‘Mirror, Mirror’ stills courtesy of Relativity.

So far, Julia Roberts has been able to keep the fact that she’s playing the Evil Queen from her kids, but that certainly doesn’t mean that she didn’t acquire some, uh, baggage while on the set of her as-yet-untitled “Snow White” movie. Presumably, Julia’s metabolism has caught up with her as she’s progressed into her 40s, which means that she’s no longer able to stay rail thin without effort. How tragic. Allegedly and according to The Enquirer, Julia’s pissed off about this weight gain because it makes her look really bad next to her hardbodied husband, Danny Moder. Here he is looking pretty good while competing in the Malibu Triathlon:

Desperate to maintain her “Pretty Woman” figure after a recent weight gain, Julia Roberts has turned into a workout maniac, say pals.

The fiery redhead, who turned 44 on Oct. 28, is furious at herself for piling on 10 pounds while filming her role as the Evil Queen in the as-yet-untitled new “Snow White” movie.

And the mom of three is determined to trim down by pounding the pavement with pals. In fact, Julia was recently spotted looking winded after jogging with a companion near her Los Angeles home.

Her goal, say insiders, is to get as lean and mean as her six pack-sporting spouse, cameraman Danny Moder.

“Julia saw the photos of herself in the beach in Hawaii this past August and thought she looked pretty good in a bikini,” said an insider, “But standing next to Danny, with his taught stomach and muscular arms, she seemed completely out of shape in comparison.

“She told him, ‘It’s not fair that you get to look as good as you do without even trying, but I have to bust my ass just to lose a couple of pounds!’ After that, Julia was absolutely determined to look almost as toned was her hubby.”

According to the source, Julia’s biggest problem in her battle of the bulge is that she tends to eat whatever she wants when she’s working. And that’s exactly what happened while making “Snow White” in Montreal.

This isn’t the first time Julia has gained weight on a film set. The 5-foot-9 actress normall weighs between 125 and 130 pounds but balooned to nearly 150 by the time she’d finished filming “Eat Pray Love” on location in Italy in 2009. “In the scene with the pizza, we started shooting at eight in the morning and by 8:45 I’d eaten eight or 10 pieces of pizza,” she told a reporter.

But now she’s running like a madwoman and doing yoga three times a week to get back in fighting form.

Still, the sources says Julia has insisted to pals that she’s not weight-obsessed “like some people in Hollywood.” “I’ll never be a stick figure,” she admitted. “But I want to give Danny a run for his money!”

[From Enquirer, print edition, November 14, 2011]

So is this story true? It’s not farfetched to believe that Julia gained a few pounds on her movie sets in recent years. Certainly, the lure of the everpresent crafts services table would be irresistable for most people, and eating pizza as a requirement for the job, well, that’s tough competition for an aging metabolsm. She probably does feel like a slouch next to her triathlete spouse, but Danny certainly works for his physique, and it never hurts anyone’s health to be in better shape. If that’s the inspiration that Julia needs to start working out, then she’ll be better for it in the long run. Maybe she’ll even get a serotonin rush or two and stop being so bitchy to her overweight sister too. Julia was photographed wearing compression pants on 9/14 although that could just be due to poor circulation, but it might also be a sign that she’s now obsessed with working out to the point of wearing them underneath her regular pants.

Photos courtesy of WENN, PCN, and Fame

By now, the images of Julia Roberts as Evil Queen (in one of two upcoming Snow White adaptations) while clad in an array of budget-looking costumes has been ingrained within our collective gossip memory. If those stills accurately portray the characters’ appearances, Julia looks truly ridiculous in her role and almost like she’s prematurely tossing in the towel to Kristen Stewart’s movie in her corner of Snow White Battle of the Bitches. It’s just as well, because Kristen’s movie really does look better anyway.

However, Julia has a much more pressing matter on her mind in relation to her take on the Evil Queen. As the mother of three children, Julia’s hoping that no one will dare tell them that she’s playing a character that scares the hell out of them. Such a calamity!

SHHH! Don’t tell Julia Roberts’ kids that their mommy is a monster — at least, on the big screen!

The Pretty Woman star recently revealed that she hasn’t told her three children she’s playing the Evil Queen in a live-action version of the animated Disney classic Snow White — because they’re terrified of the character!

“I haven’t spelled it out that I’m the Evil Queen,” Julia admitted in a recent interview. “Because I showed them [Disney's] Snow White and they had nightmares and they cried.”

Julia, 44, has three children with cameraman hubby Danny Moder — fraternal twins Hazel and Phinnaeus, 6, and Henry, 4 — and she never dreamed they’d react so violently to the Evil Queen in Disney’s feature-length cartoon.

“When the kids cried and had nightmares, Julia went to Danny and asked him, ‘Now what do I do?’” a source close to the Moder family told The ENQUIRER.

“She’s afraid to break it to them that she’s now playing that horrible, mean character. So, she’s putting it off as long as possible, and hoping no one else will tell them!”

But a top psychologist believes that Julia should explain her movie character to her kids.

“Children that young are still confused about the difference between reality and fantasy,” famed psychologist Dr. Judy Kuriansky told The ENQUIRER.

“Julia should tell her kids that she can pretend to be mean in a movie, but she’ll never treat them that way.”

Thankfully, Julia’s got some time. The still untitled film won’t be released until March 2012.

[From Enquirer, print edition, 10/31/2011]

Well, I guess this rules out Julia offering up the “I did it for my kids and not the money” excuse when someone inevitably asks why she did this movie. Still, she’s in quite a pickle because, sooner or later, someone’s going to end up telling Julia’s kids that their mommy is playing the Evil Queen, so she may as well ‘fess up to them while they’re still young and capable of virtually unconditional forgiveness. Either that, or perhaps Julia should start being nicer to everyone around her so that she doesn’t have to live in fear of retaliation, including the overweight sister that she takes such joy in tormenting. With stories like that, Julia really seems fit for the Evil Queen role in real life too.

Photos courtesy of Photos courtesy of Relativity Media/The Mail and Fame.

Here are some photos of Julia Roberts at last night’s premiere of Fireflies in the Garden, that movie where she plays Ryan Reynolds’s mom. They shot the film back in 2007, and it’s like Ryan wants no part of it – he didn’t show up for the junket, and now he didn’t even show up for the premiere. Haha, this film must suck.

Anyway, let’s talk about fashion first – Julia’s outfit is kind of meh, but I think it looks good on her. Lately, she’s been covering up a lot, and sometimes her style seems too matronly for a 40-something. But this is covered up and cute. Oooooh, nevermind. I just saw the sheer blouse and how it seems like Julia isn’t wearing a bra.

Yikes. No, this outfit is a train wreck. And the blazer is too big. But my least favorite thing is that Julia’s penchant for giant necklaces. It feels like she does a big necklace for every red carpet, and it’s boring. It also draws the eye to her face, which…

…It’s jacked, right? I’m not have a Claritin D hallucination? There’s Botox and lip injections happening in this mess, correct? I’ve always thought that Julia had her eyes done several years ago, but I’ve never really paid attention to anything else. In these photos, I’m really noticing how her forehead doesn’t move (plus that Botox vein). I’m also noticing how crazy her lips look. CB said that in closeups during Eat, Pray, Love, she thought Julia was getting lip injections too.

Last year, in an interview with Elle Magazine, Julia denied ever touching her face, though. She pontificated, “It’s unfortunate that we live in such a panicked, dysmorphic society where women don’t even give themselves a chance to see what they’ll look like as older persons. I want my kids to know when I’m pissed, when I’m happy and when I’m confounded. Your face tells a story and it shouldn’t be a story about your drive to the doctor’s office.” O RLY?!?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

These are some new production stills from the new Snow White movie. No, not the one with Kristen Stewart as Snow White – that film is called Snow White and the Huntsman, and in that one, Snow is a warrior-princess or something. No, this other version of Snow White just seems like a live-action version of the cartoon. And by that, I mean that it looks really, really budget. Lily Collins plays Snow in this one, with Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen and Armie Hammer as the prince/love interest. Since this is so photo-heavy, let me just do some random thoughts with the relevant photos:

I hope Lily Collins is a talented actress, considering so much of the film is going to rest on her performance. I have the feeling that she has the potential to be a very attractive young woman, but it feels like she’s too young right now. Too young for this part, too young to carry a movie. Also, her brows are killing me. That’s some Sam Waterson brow happening there.

As for Julia Roberts – her costumes SUCK. Why does everything look so cheap?!? I can’t even look beyond the funky costumes. It’s like they’re trying to do Tim Burton on a budget.

The sets look budget too. And yes, that’s Nathan Lane back there. He’s the Evil Queen’s henchman or something. I bet he and Julia either had a great time together, or they absolutely hated each other.

Lily Collins says: “Julia’s playing evil in a way that I don’t think people are going to expect. Everyone loves that Julia smile and laugh and she maintains that, but in such this creepy eerie way that you don’t know if you love her or hate her. She’s brilliant and it’s been an honour. She’s so nice, she’s so classy, she’s just everything I had hoped she’d be. Julia gets to be quite horrible to me. There’s a scene where she pulls my hair and she pulled it so hard that some of it came out! But we kept rolling and afterward she was like, ‘I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!’” Yes, I’m sure it was an “accident”.

OMG!!!!!!!! Her swan headpiece is just disturbing. JESUS CHRIST.

Armie Hammer already looks like a cartoon prince, so this one is obvious.

Why are the dwarves throwing gang signs?

Photos courtesy of Relativity Media/The Mail.

It was never a question of what movie would end up in the #1 position at the box office over the holiday weekend but only how high the numbers would go. In this case, Transformers: Dark of the Moon made $97.4 million for a five-day total of $162.1 million over the lengthy holiday weekend; in doing so, T3 has effectively broken the Independence Day weekend record that was previously held by the likes of Spider-Man 2, which (consequently) is now only semi-memorable for the moment when Kirsten Dunst nipped out while screaming for Tobey Maguire to rescue her damsel-in-distress self from certain demise.

Of course, Transformers 3 was exactly the type of mindless movie that everyone hoped it would be, and it even threw in a few anti-Megan Fox jokes for the benefit of all fans of The Oral History of Michael Bay; that is, if there are any Bay fans at all who don’t just go for the explosions. Certainly, Bay had a hand in the fact that Sam Witwicky’s (Shia LeBeouf) pet robots made explicit mention that his ex-girlfriend, Michaela (Fox), was super mean to them, which resulted in the robots’ declaration that they’re incredibly happy that she was no longer present in their lives (and, by extension, the franchise’s third installment). Yeah, keep stoking that fire, Bay, and stroking your own dong in the process.

Paramount’s latest Transformers: Dark Of The Moon is the giant #1 movie after opening with some 3D-only nighttime sneaks on Tuesday ($5.5M), followed by a full release into 4,013 theaters on Wednesday ($37.7M) and Thursday ($21.4M). Now Friday brings in a big $32.8M, and Saturday $34M. As of Friday, that’s still -24% behind 2009′s Transformers 2 ($98M vs $128M) despite TF3‘s higher 3D ticket prices. Michael Bay’s robot actioner should near $100M domestic this three-day weekend, and $180M through the Fourth of July. “We expected to start behind the last one,” a Paramount exec tells me. “This one has an ‘A’ CinemaScore and better reviews, so it should play to a better multiple.”

Transformers: Dark Of The Moon could break these July 4th holiday box office records: 3-DAY RECORD (bettering Spider-Man 2‘s $88.2M); 4-DAY RECORD (bettering Spider-Man 2′s $115.8M), 5-DAY RECORD (bettering Twilight Saga: Eclipse‘s $157.6M).

[From Deadline]

In second place was Cars 2, which added an additional $25.1 million for a total of $116.0 million after two weekend. In third place (and also in its second weekend) was Bad Teacher, which paired Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake in a raunchy R-rated comedy with $14.1 million for a total of $59.5 million. Besides the latest Tranformers flick, there were two other openers this weekend. One of them, Larry Crowne, landed in fourth place with a measly $13.0 million, which is positively abysmal considering that the movie starred two A-listers, Tom Hanks and Julia “Bitchface” Roberts (perhaps she’ll have slightly better luck with that ill-fated Snow White reboot). In fifth place, Monte Carlo took in merely $7.6 million, which solidifies the fact that getting one’s toes rubbed by Justin Bieber has done absolutely nothing for Selena Gomez’s big-time Hollywood feature film career.

Movie stills/posters courtesy of AllMoviePhoto

Julia Roberts tried to work a fitted, possibly polyester blend suit at the Larry Crowne premiere in LA yesterday. I like the tailored suit trend, but this outfit is just wrong on Julia, especially with the matching shell under the jacket. All she needed to complete this look was a silky top in a color that popped. Instead it’s all kind of monochrome except for the jade necklace, which looks like a set piece from Eat, Pray Love. Plus those pants need to be hemmed for her a little. Her hair and makeup are polished yet effortless though. I love the loose bun she’s wearing in her hair.

Also at last night’s premiere was Taraji P. Hensen in a crimson dress. It looks like Leger and I’m over that too-tight dress trend. She looks hot though. IMDB has her listed in the movie although I didn’t spot her in the trailer.

Model Selita Ebanks, not in this movie, had on a ridiculous v-neck fuschia mini dress with gemstone detail at the sides. She paired it with leopard peep toe ankle booties and gold bangle bracelets. She’s a knockout, but what a wreck that outfit is. Plus check out her rooster hair.

Jenna Elfman, another non-costar, was there in a breezy purple dress, gold kitten heels and a canary clutch. She’s cray to the z but I like her look here. My hairdresser would have something to say about her very chunky highlights, although he’d praise the cut.

Tom Hanks, Julia’s costar, wore his best freshly washed jeans with a navy dress shirt and plain jacket. His wife, Rita Wilson, tried a little harder in a sequin cocktail dress and tuxedo jacket. You would think that these two would work to coordinate more considering that they’ve been married for 22 years, but maybe Rita lets Tom do his own thing. If Tom were my man I would try to dress him better.

Tom seems to have arrived by scooter, at least part of the way. His character rides a scooter in the film and it’s doubtful that he took that thing more than a few blocks. Otherwise it might explain why he was dressed like a deliveryman.

Bonus pic – a freshly shorn Bryan Cranston with his wife Robin Dearden. This is how a couple coordinates, and apparently they’ve been together about as long as Tom and Rita.

Here’s the trailer. It looks cute but I’ll probably wait to see it on DVD. Larry Crowne is out this Friday in the US, on July 1.

Photo credit: Fame Pictures

While this story may or may not be true, it sure does seem believable at the very least. To bring everyone up to speed, there will be two competing Snow White adaptations, which come from different film studios and shall be released less than a month apart in 2012. One of the movies, a “revisionist take,” is called Snow White and the Huntsman and stars Kristen Stewart as the eye-roling, mouth-breathing titular character and Chris Hemsworth as the Huntsman. The other version will be a more straightforward version of the tale with Lily Collins as Snow White and Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen. Such a mess, right?

Now the Enquirer has taken advantage of these details (and Julia’s reputation as a rude and obnoxious bitch to everyone, including her own family) to create a rift between the relative star power at work in either movie; that is, Kristen and Julia are now reportedly at each other’s throats:

Twilight vampire lover Kristen Stewart is baring her fangs at Julia Roberts — over their competing versions of the new Snow White movies.

The stars are scrambling to be first to release their films — and their war of words is enough to make the Seven Dwarfs blush

“Kristen thinks Julia’s currently untitled version of “Snow White” is old-fashioned and dull,” divulged a source close to the 21-year old actress. “She thinks only old fogies will see it. She believes that her movie — Snow White and the Huntsman — is a more contemporary take on the much-loved story.”

Hollywood legend Julia is seething over the disrespectful attitude of newcomer Kristen, said a friend of the 43-year old Oscar winner. “Julia thinks Kristen’s a young punk who’s too big for her britches! She told a pal, ‘We’ll just see who has the bigger movie. She might have to eat her words!’”

Kristen’s film is an edgier take on the classic fairytale, focusing on the huntsman — played by hunky Thor star Chris Hemsworth.

In Julia’s more literal version, she’ll play the evil queen while actress Lily Collins from The Blind Side has been cast as Snow White.

In a dramatic race to be first to the box office, Kristen’s producers moved up the opening date from December 21, 2012, to June 1 next year to get the jump on Julia’s movie, which was slated for a June 29, 2012, premiere.

Julia’s camp countered by moving her flick up to March 15 — even though filming has just begun.

“No one wants to have another film running with the same scenario,” said Hollywood.com box-office division president Paul Dergarabedian. “Once the first one comes out, it is hard to convince audiences to go again. In their minds, it’s the same movie.”

[From Enquirer, print edition, July 4, 2011]

Unfortunately, this will probably not be a battle between the quality of these movie but will likely favor whichever movie gets to the multiplexes first. Under equal circumstances, I’d be more inclined to watch the less traditional take on the story merely because of the creativity factor involved, but that doesn’t mean much in terms of enjoyability either. After all, the recent Red Riding Hood tried to mix up its fairy tale but was largely a ridiculous atmospheric mess, so who knows how a revisionist take on Snow White would go over? Quote frankly, I’m not entirely sure that the public will care that much about either one.

Still, the idea of a feuding Kristen and Julia is a pretty hilarious one at that. I can see Julia getting all up in Kristen’s face only to be confronted by an eye roll and a puff of marijuana smoke.

Photos courtesy of Fame

This week, Kaiser gave us a fresh reminder of just how nasty, rude, and obnoxious Julia Roberts can really be, and it seems that her niece (and daughter of Eric Roberts) is well on the path to claiming that portion of the family legacy. Generally speaking, we already know that Emma is both entitled and smug and 20 going on 12, but now she takes issue with people (primarily those nefarious bloggers) who dare to insinuate that her family name has helped her get movie roles. You see, this notion is simply “so ridiculous” and “obviously not true” even though Emma seems to have forgotten that her role in Valentine’s Day most definitely came as a result of Aunt Julia’s involvement.

Outside of that bit role in a box-office slam dunk, Emma’s effort to prove some cred of her own has faltered miserably. Sure, she’s a serviceble enough little puppet in roles like Nancy Drew and Hotel for Dogs, but she doesn’t really shine and comes off as very easily replaceable onscreen. Last year, It’s Kind of a Funny Story failed to recoup its budget even though Emma walked around in her bra and panties throughout the movie. (Don’t forget that she still insists that actresses who go topless are “tasteless”. Emma’s also got a movie coming out this weekend, The Art of Getting By (she plays a popular high school girl that decides to date a misfit), which is currently sitting at 21% on Rotten Tomatoes. Still, let’s not even mention the possibility that Aunt Julia has anything at all to do with Emma Roberts getting either of these roles as a romantic leading lady because she spoke to Popeater and proved us all wrong:

Did you go to school?
I went to school till seventh grade and then I was home schooled through high school.

Was it strange to play a high school student?
I mean, no because high school is such a big part of American culture, it’s so prevalent in music and TV and movies, I think I get the gist!

In the beginning did everyone accuse you of nepotism because of your dad and aunt?
A lot of people think that and they talk about nepotism which I think is so ridiculous considering it’s obviously not true, because I’ve auditioned for so many things and never gotten the part. Also it’s like, you know, maybe someone can get you one part but they can’t really get you ten parts.

Would you want to work with her?
Yes I would love to. I think it would be really fun for us.

You know you’ll be accused of nepotism if it happens.
Oh well, if someone wants to say that to my face. If someone blogs about it I’ll be annoyed. I think it’s so funny people will blog stuff but they won’t say it to your face. I would actually have more respect for them if they said it to my face, then I would probably not say anything back.

Are you immune to nasty comments online or do you still get upset?
I don’t read them anymore but obviously you know that they’re there. For me I can’t let it bother me because for me anyone hiding behind a computer is kind of irrelevant.

Or a loser.
Uh uh. Also I can handle it, but there are some people with the whole bullying thing can’t handle it and do horrible things to themselves.

How come there are no photos of you tripping outside a nightclub?
I love going to Europe because you’re allowed to go out. I’m not trying to go out to be a mess but I love to go dancing and in Europe I’m old enough to be allowed to go out dancing with my friends. I love London, it’s my favorite place.

[From Popeater]

Okay, Emma’s clearly on the defensive (and in denial) here about the fact that a famous name might not get you everywhere in Hollywood (see Angus Sutherland), but it will get your foot in the door. This is particularly the case when talent is not a huge factor, which is the case where Emma is concerned. Seriously, in a Hollywood where even Rumer Willis can get consistent work, nobody can claim that nepotism doesn’t exist. Rumer isn’t an awful actress, but she isn’t any good either, but standards are really low for those with a family name. One really has to be a bad as poor Angus to lose that initial golden foothold. Of course, I generally feel a slight pang of guilt for giving Emma some crap here because it’s not like she’s headed the way of the Crackhead Lohan in her early twenties. Still, the girl needs to appreciate where she came from and learn a little humility. Hopefully, that’ll come with age.

Incidentally, Emma also claims in the Popeater interview to wear heels “24/7,” but I guess that doesn’t include the below photograph, which was taken less than a month ago. Don’t judge!

Photos courtesy of WENN