Madonna said she’d move to Malawi if that’s what it took for her to adopt 4-year-old Mercy James. But she’s clearly not planning on making it her permanent home – not that anyone ever thought she would. Madge just plunked down $40 million on an enormous 12,000 square foot townhouse on Manhattan’s Upper East Side. Because she’s got more money than she knows what to do with, Madonna can obviously still move to Malawi for a bit if she chooses. But still… $40 million… just… damn.

Looks like Malawi will have to wait — Madonna is moving to the Upper East Side, The Post has learned. Madge has signed a contract to buy a four-story, Georgian-style townhouse on East 81st Street for about $40 million, sources said. That’s some $5 million less than the original asking price.

“The townhouse is perfect for Madonna,” according to one source. “She’s trying to recreate London in New York City, and this is in the style of a London townhouse.” But her new home in what brokers call the “Far East” does not appear to be all that much of a bargain. No residence in that area “has ever sold for $20 million, let alone $30 million — or ever will again,” said one broker who asked not to be identified.

The kaballah convert will also find the house has bad vibes — specifically from the Lexington Avenue subway. People inside the 26-room mansion can hear and feel the trains coming through, according to one visitor.

But on the plus side, the double-wide mansion does have a two-car garage, a 3,000-square- foot garden, nine fireplaces, an elevator and a wine cellar with a grotto. And with 13 bedrooms and 14 bathrooms, it certainly has the space to accommodate Madonna’s family, which — at this point — does not include even a semi-permanent replacement for ex-hubby Guy Ritchie.

When Mayor Bloomberg was asked today whether he’d send Madonna a thank you note for buying a new place – a boost to the city’s sagging revenues – he said, “No. But we do plan to send her a bill.”

[From the New York Post]

That’s why I love Bloomie – smartass comments like that. Madonna plans to do a lot of remodeling of the place – even at $40 million, nothing is up to her exacting specifications. The Post also noted that it features the “soothing sounds of [the] 4,5, and 6.” Meaning the 4, 5, and 6 trains. How relaxing. I honestly wouldn’t find that to be a big deal – it’s commonplace to hear and feel the trains under you in New York. A lot of dangerous things could happen and I’d just assume it was an F train underneath me. That said, I don’t live over one, and I imagine that could get a bit grating on the nerves. And Madonna strikes me as the type who’s easily annoyed. If it gets bothersome I’m sure she’ll just make the city move the train tunnels or something.

In related Madonna news, while a lot of us tend to see her as rather cold and emotionless, there have been many reports that she’s having an exceptionally hard time dealing with losing her adoption bid.

Putting on a brave face despite her crushing disappointment after her adoption bid was turned down, she spent two nights out in a row in London with Stella McCartney.

A smiling Madonna was spotted arriving at the Mayfair restaurant Cecconi’s to meet Stella. However, once inside, the 50-year-old mother of three reportedly became tearful as she showed her fashion designer chum a photograph of the little girl she had been expecting to bring home with her. “She dug around in her handbag for the photo and was excitedly showing it off to Stella,” a source to a newspaper. “but it was clearly too much, the moment overcame her.”

[From Hello! Magazine, April 20, 2009, print ed.]

It’s strange to hear about Madonna having some sort of human frailty. In so many ways she just seems like a machine: she keeps going no matter what. There’s also such a rigid focus on perfection, and you forget even she’s going to lose people she cares about. It’ll be interesting to see just how committed she is to adopting Mercy, and if she really does move to Malawi.

And at least Madge will have that $40 million house to come back to.

Here’s Madonna taking a helicopter ride from Battersea, England carrying a large Louis Vuitton bag on April 9th, along with pictures of her new digs. Images thanks to WENN.com and Mavrix.

The tabloids are reporting this week that Madonna isn’t about to give up her bid to adopt Mercy James and they seem to be right. The 50 year-old pop singer and mother of three e-mailed Malawi’s Nation paper that she still intends to provide a home for the girl after her initial adoption attempt was denied:

“I want to provide Mercy with a home, a loving family environment and the best education and healthcare possible,” she e-mailed Malawi’s Nation newspaper in response to its questions. “And it’s my hope that she, like David, will one day return to Malawi and help the people of their country.”

Madonna, 50, continued: “Though I have been advised that I cannot publicly discuss the pending appeal regarding my desire to adopt Mercy, I do want to say how much I appreciate the level of support that I have received from the people of Malawi and my friends around the world.”

[From US Magazine]

Madonna’s appeal might be successful and she could eventually take Mercy home as expected. It was surprising that she was told “no” for once, and US Weekly reports from a source in the latest print issue that the judge who ruled against Madonna, Esme Chombo, “is very religious and a moralist. She might not be in favor of Madonna’s lifestyle and her seminude stage antics.” Madonna did violate adoption laws in the country and Chombo stated in her ruling that allowing her to adopt without meeting residency requirements would open the floodgates for child trafficking. She may be attempting to reconcile that and is said to be building a home along with a girls’ school in Malawi.

Madonna is single again after her divorce was finalized, but that might not be for long. She’s had at least two romances in the past few months, including a fling with a model young enough to be her grandson. Most recently Madonna was spotted getting cosy with none other than her ex husband, Guy Ritchie. Ritchie issued a statement in support of Madonna following her failed adoption bid but is thought to be privately against another adoption. He must be somewhat supportive in person if this latest news from News of The World is accurate. The exes were seen cuddling at a Kabbalah event.

The pair were all over each other at a bizarre Kabbalah celebration in central London on Wednesday.

Yes, you heard me right. An insider confirmed: “Guy was stroking Madonna’s back and they were cuddling. She looked very sad and Guy seemed to be comforting her. LOURDES and ROCCO were there too. They looked like a family again.”

[From News of The World]

If this is true, he could have just been hugging her or something. The item is so brief that it’s hard to tell. I don’t see these two reconciling anytime soon, and even if Madonna is open to it I doubt that Ritchie will take the bait. He learned his lesson. At least they’re friendly for the sake of their children amid all this turmoil over the adoption. It’s got to be hard for them.

Madonna is shown with Lourdes at the airport in London on 4/12/09. Credit: BIG PICTURES/bauergriffinonline.com

The rumors around Madonna aren’t going to quit any time soon. Many sources are reporting that Madonna will not take “no” for an answer when it comes to adopting little Mercy James. But some sources are reporting that Guy Ritchie and some of Madge’s friends are trying to convince her to give up the ghost. In either case, Madonna has her heart set on building a home in Malawi, according to The Sun.

Madonna has allegedly already purchased a plot of land in Malawi, and is having designs made for her future African home. Madge is also committed to building a girls’ school in the village of Chinkhota, which would likely be adjacent to Madge’s planned home. The Sun has more:

MADONNA is hoping to build a home in Malawi despite her application to adopt three-year-old local MERCY JAMES being refused.

Last week a judge turned down her bid to become the girl’s legal mother because Madge hadn’t lived in the country for 18 months.

Nevertheless, the chart-topper has instructed her architects to draw up plans for a home in the African country, as she believes adopted son DAVID BANDA would benefit from a connection to his birthplace.

I’m told: “Madonna has a big, beautiful plot of land over there already. She’s planning to build a girl’s school in the Chinkhota village and those designs are well under way.”

“But she’s gone back to the designers and asked if they could accommodate a family home on the plot or on adjacent land.”

From The Sun

So, a girls’ school and a family home, both in a third-world country? It’s like Madonna is not only trying to copy Angelina Jolie (de-mined home in Cambodia) but Oprah Winfrey as well, who runs a girls’ school in South Africa. Am I being too hard on Madge? Those Malawian girls who will be getting an education thanks to Madonna’s largesse won’t complain. Although, the Malawian girls’ school would likely be done with some sort of Kabbalah-influences, so who knows? If Madge really wants the home in Malawi, good for her. At the very least, she’ll stimulate the Malawian economy with all of the paparazzi who will follow her down there when she’s on vacation at her Malawian summer home.

Madonna is shown out in London on 4/8/09. Credit: BIG PICTURES/bauergriffinonline.com

Will Madonna and Guy Ritchie go another round? Probably not, but Guy is sticking by Madonna as she tries to gather herself in the wake of a failed adoption. According to The Sun, Guy has been a major part of Madonna’s support system following Madge’s return to England. This comes after a year of bad vibes and bad attitudes – from both of them.

So this is how it happened – Rocco was with his mom, and he called his dad. Rocco then told Guy that “Mummy is crying”. Rocco handed the phone over to Madonna, and Madge and Guy spent some time talking. This is the sound of their relationship thawing, apparently. There’s also a source who claims that Madge rarely “turns on the waterworks”, which I tend to believe. Madonna doesn’t seem like a crier. I’d assume that when The Gristle gets upset, she usually works out.

The thick layer of ice between GUY RITCHIE and MADONNA is starting to thaw.

Film director Guy has been consoling his ex over her failed adoption bid in a series of tearful phone calls, I can reveal. The Queen of Pop divorced Guy in January, blaming his “unreasonable behaviour”. But relations have warmed after Guy stepped in to comfort Madge — known to pals as Em — when she broke down during a call to their son Rocco earlier this week.

An insider said: “Civil conversations between them have been few and far between in the past year. But over the last week things have improved. Guy had Rocco over for a visit when Em called to see if he was OK, as she always does when she is away from the kids.”

“Rocco was speaking to her and suddenly turned to Guy and said, ‘Daddy, Daddy. Mummy is crying’. He then handed Guy the phone.”

Madge was devastated after being told three-year-old Malawi girl Mercy James can’t join her brood — LOURDES, 12, Rocco, eight, and three-year-old DAVID BANDA, who she adopted from Malawi in 2006.

The insider continued: “It’s unusual for Em to turn on the waterworks but this has really upset her. Explaining to Rocco why Mercy wasn’t coming home has been difficult.”

“Guy was incredibly sympathetic, calmed her down and told her to be happy with the family she had.”

The call led to more chats between them about appealing the decision. Guy stunned everyone by issuing a statement supporting Madge after a Malawian judge refused the adoption, even though other authorities gave it the green light, because she hadn’t lived in the country for 18 months.

He said: “I fully supported Madonna in her decision to apply for this adoption, and I am saddened her application has been rejected. She is motivated only by being a caring parent who seeks to share some of the advantages and opportunities that her life has given her.”

[From The Sun]

Guy’s statement of support last week really stunned a lot of people. He showed himself to be the bigger, and better man. Even if Guy is just doing all of this for good press (which I doubt), he didn’t have to stand so solidly behind Madonna’s adoption efforts. Guy really seems like he’s doing all of this to have a better relationship with Madonna, probably for the sake of their kids. Does he want to get back with Madge? Would you?

A 6.3 magnitude earthquake hit the Abruzzo region of Italy on Monday. So far, more than 100 people died either in the earthquake, or in the aftermath. Thousands were injured, and tens of thousands have been left homeless.

The mayor of a small town in the Abruzzo region, a hamlet called Pacentro, reached out the “famous granddaughter” of two former Pacentro residents. That granddaughter was Madonna, and she opened her heart and her wallet to support those affected by the earthquake. Her publicist confirms that Madonna donated, but she’s not saying how much. A “source” tells People Magazine that the donation was $500,000.

When a devastating earthquake struck the Abruzzo region of Italy on Monday, the mayor of the hamlet of Pacentro made an appeal for help to the granddaughter of two former townspeople. The following morning, that granddaughter responded in a big way.

Madonna, whose paternal grandparents lived in Pacentro until 1919, made a “substantial donation” for the relief effort following the 6.3 magnitude quake that left more than 200 dead, says her publicist Liz Rosenberg. The rep wouldn’t give the amount, but a source says it’s about $500,000.

“I am happy to lend a helping hand to the town that my ancestors are from,” Madonna tells PEOPLE. “My heart goes out to the families that have lost loved ones or their homes.”

From People Magazine

Instead of snarking, I’ll just acknowledge that Madonna did a nice thing. She’s got me so brainwashed with her faux English accent, I sometimes forget Madonna’s just an Italian-American girl from Detroit. It’s nice that Madonna would show some respect for her Italian heritage and donate to those in need. Good work, Madge.

Thanks to BIG PICTURES/bauergriffinonline.com for these photos of Madonna and the unknown guy she probably hooked up with last night. He is said to have gone home with her after dinner.

Madonna and her daughter Lourdes are both said to be devastated by a judge’s ruling that she can’t adopt 4-year-old Mercy James from Malawi. Though it’s hard to see Madge as someone with emotions and who’s capable of feeling real sadness, she’s obviously going through a hard time right now, and told her aids that what happened wasn’t right. I’m not sure I can say I feel as much empathy for her as I probably should, but it’s hard not to feel badly for Lourdes and the rest of Madonna’s kids, along with little Mercy – who was said to have bonded with what she thought would be her new family.

Madonna devastated after officials blocked her adoption of a 3-year-old girl from Malawi, telling aides, “it’s not right.” The Material Girl, who is now back in London, even referred to Chifundo (Mercy) James as “my little girl” before heading home, Australia’s Herald Sun newspaper reports.

“I can’t believe I’m leaving my beautiful baby behind,” she said. “It’s not right. I love that baby girl … she needs to be with me.” Madonna’s daughter Lourdes was reportedly heartbroken that her mom was barred from the adoption. The 50-year-old pop icon looked downcast after spending her final hours with Mercy, the child a judge blocked her from adopting last week, before jetting out of the country.

“Madonna spent some time with Mercy; she looked sad. But Lourdes, who had clicked with the little girl, looked devastated,” a staffer at the Kumbali Lodge where Madonna had been staying, told People magazine. Anne Chikhwaza, director of the Kondanani Children’s Village, took the girl back to the orphanage, the staffer said.

[From the Daily News]

Mercy’s emotions must have bounced all over the place in the last week. This whole ordeal has likely been incredibly confusing for her. I can’t imagine what it would be like to be told you have a new family and to spend time with them and probably get excited like only a little child can. And then have it all suddenly taken away. That’s not to say the judge was wrong – perhaps what is ultimately best for Mercy is to stay in her own country and/or be adopted by someone willing to obey the laws and live in Malawi for a year. But what an emotional rollercoaster.

Something tells me Madonna will get over this. While she’s upset now, she doesn’t strike me as the sort to feel things super deeply for an extended period of time. It’s hard not to cheer for her failure, because it’s downright wrong for her to ignore another country’s laws and think she can do whatever the hell she wants, so long as she can throw money at the problem. Maybe next time she’ll remember that it’s not just her own wishes that matter – she’s taking a bunch of kids along for the ride, and their feelings matter too.

Here’s Madonna arriving at Cicconi Restaurant in London yesterday. Images thanks to WENN .

On Saturday Night Live, Madonna and Angelina Jolie sparred on Weekend Update. Really, Abby Elliot (as Angelina Jolie) and Kristen Wiig (as Madonna) sparred on Weekend Update. The fight was about adopted babies, of course, with “Angelina” taunting “Madonna” about an island filled with babies, then distracting “Madonna” with a decoy tot. It was pretty funny.

Abby Elliot does a really good Angelina Jolie, I have to admit. She just gets the facial expression just right – something about the eyebrows – but Angelina doesn‘t stand around with her hand on her hip. Abby should work on that for Angelina’s next appearance. And even though I’m a big fan of Kristen Wiig, she needs to work on her Madonna a bit more. More with the faux English accent, and she should make “Madonna” have more pronounced cheekbones. The Huffington Post has more:

During “Saturday Night Live’s” Weekend Update, Madonna and Angelina Jolie sparred in a baby-off.

Madonna was just denied a second child from Malawi while Jolie has adopted kids from Cambodia, Vietnam and Ethiopia.

Madonna, played by Kristen Wiig, told Seth Meyers, “I love babies, but I especially love getting babies from crazy places.”

Moments later Jolie, played by Amy Elliot [sic], interrupts and challenges Madonna over who has babies from more exotic locales.

[From Huffington Post]

Even though SNL did it all in a hilarious way, the Madonna-Angelina comparisons on mainstream news have been pissing me off. It’s all fun and games until someone doesn’t follow the rules – which, for the record, Angelina has always done. All three of her foreign adoptions have followed both the letter and spirit of international adoption laws and State Department guidelines. Madonna, not so much. So what’s the comparison?

Madonna has returned to the UK without four year-old Mercy after filing an appeal against a judge’s ruling that she is barred from adopting the child. The 50 year-old superstar violated adoption regulations by not residing in the country for 18 to 24 months, and judge Esme Chombo said in her ruling on Friday that allowing Madonna to leave with Mercy against the law could make the children of Malawi vulnerable to human trafficking.

Guy Ritchie has hugs for sons, cold shoulder for Madonna
Ex husband Guy Ritchie met Madonna’s private plane at the airport. He was seen hugging his adopted son David Banda and looking incredibly happy to see him, but seemed to ignore Madonna. Ritchie issued a positive statement in support of Madonna after her adoption bid was denied.

Madonna screamed “What?” after learning of ruling
Madonna is said to have screamed “What?” and to have been shaking after hearing the news. She was not present at the hearing and was given the bad news by her lawyer, who cockily said before the hearing that “I don’t see any law in Malawi that can stop this adoption.”

Mercy: “Where’s my mum?”
In her bid to adopt Mercy, Madonna was repeating the same mistakes she made in her adoption of David Banda, who has a living father who wasn’t aware he was signing away all rights to his son. Mercy’s grandmother has said that she doesn’t want the girl to leave the country, and refused to sign adoption papers. Many of us were rejoicing at learning that Madonna couldn’t spirit away a little girl at whim. She seemed so arrogant and determined to have her way and to thumb her nose at Malawi’s adoption laws yet again.

There’s an innocent little girl involved here though, and although we may be happy that Madonna can’t flout the law we have to think what’s best for the child. Mercy stayed with Madonna and her children while the singer was in the country and got to know them as her future family. This is no triumph for Mercy, who is said to have been confused by Madonna and her family’s departure and to have cried “Where’s my mummy?” when Madonna left. Mercy was told that she would be leaving for a new life, and this has got to be upsetting and confusing for her. I don’t blame the judge as much as I blame Madonna for not even trying to stay in Malawi for even part of the time required for non-famous parents.

Mercy’s father found
Mercy’s biological father has been found, and he doesn’t want his little girl to leave the country either. The Daily Mail has a statement from Mercy’s dad along with the account of how now 24 year-old James Kambewa fell in love with Mercy’s mom Mwandida when she was just 15. That means James was 20 when he romanced the schoolgirl.

Mwandida fell pregnant by James and was forced to drop out of school and stay with her family. Her former roommate told The Mail that she was a smart girl who came from humble beginnings and worked hard at school. Mwandida delivered her baby at home with only her mother present, and she died a few days after childbirth.

James fled the town out of disgrace after Mwandida’s pregnancy. He now lives in a remote village and works as a night watchman. He says he is pleased to learn that his child is alive and that he wants to be part of her life:

Mwandida died eight days after giving birth. James has never been seen in the family’s home village of Thwonde in southern Malawi since the outcry and until yesterday he had no idea that a wealthy pop star was planning to adopt Mercy, whom he has never seen.

James, who has a casual job as a night watchman, told The Mail on Sunday: ‘I am longing to hear more about Mercy. I was never allowed to see her and now I am determined to make up for that.

‘Her family was very angry with me when Mwandida became pregnant. My own relatives advised me to leave town. It was a big scandal – both of us were in disgrace.

‘Now I hear that my little girl will be famous, and best of all I can form some bond with her at last.’

James, who lives in a one-room hut with two male friends in a poor area of the nearby city, added: ‘I need to think about what all this means. I need to try and make sense of it…’

Mercy’s 70-year-old grandmother said she believed it was God’s will that the High Court had ruled against Madonna’s adoption.

Lucy Chekechiwa said: ‘I accept whatever God has prepared for us. She can start primary school and be part of our family again.’

[From The Daily Mail]

Mercy will stay at the orphanage where she was raised until she is six, at which point The Mail notes that “she is expected to have developed resistance to the fatal childhood diseases such as malaria that are endemic in Malawi.”

There are enough relatives who want the child to stay in Malawi, including her grandmother and now her father. It is not up to Madonna to say whether the child will have a better life with her if there are blood relatives who want to care for the girl. While Madonna has provided David a privileged and happy childhood, I couldn’t help but notice how much wonder and longing you could see in photos of David’s biological father when he saw his son.

To people who say David’s father should have kept his infant son instead of giving him up to an orphanage – most of us cannot imagine the level of poverty that forces someone to give up a child. David’s mother died in childbirth and his father could not afford the milk to feed the baby and he had no cow. He was afraid that his son would have died in his care. Madonna wanted that boy and she gave him a good life. She also could have given his father a cow or a goat and ensured that he was well cared for by his own family. Do you think she’ll send a small amount of money or livestock to Mercy’s family to ensure that the girl she considers her daughter is fed and clothed, or do you think she’ll just continue to fight the ruling, ignoring the wishes of Mercy’s grandmother and father and getting her way at any cost?

Here’s Madonna at an adoption hearing at the Malawi High Court in Lilongwe last Monday. Photo thanks to Fame Pictures .

Guy Ritchie has succeeded in out-classing Madonna. Is that difficult? Probably not. But instead of kicking Madge when she’d down, Guy instead released a statement of support. This comes just hours after a judge rejected her adoption attempt for little Mercy James, saying that Madge had not fulfilled the requirements for a prospective adoptive parent.

In Guy’s statement, he refers to Madonna as “a fantastic and loving mother who cares deeply about her own children and children who may need additional help and support.” Guy goes on to say that Madonna’s motivations for adopting were only that of a caring parent wishing to give “advantages and opportunities” to another child.

Madonna’s former husband, Guy Ritchie, has expressed his sadness over her failed adoption of a child from Malawi and praised her as a “great mum”.

A judge at Malawi’s High Court in Lilongwe rejected the singer’s application to adopt Mercy James, a four-year-old girl, ruling that the child should remain in her home country.

In a statement, Ritchie said: “Madonna is a fantastic and loving mother who cares deeply about her own children, and children who may need additional help and support. I fully supported Madonna in her decision to apply for this adoption, and I am saddened that her application has been rejected. She is motivated only by being a caring parent who seeks to share some of the advantages and opportunities that her life has given her. This time it did not work out, but there will be other opportunities and I wish her well in them. She is a great mum.”

He spoke out after Judge Esmie Chondo turned down an interim adoption application which would have allowed Madonna to take Mercy to the United States, pending a permanent decision on her future.

From The Telegraph

Even though his statement was very classy, I can’t help but think Guy was probably itching to call Madonna “It” just once. Probably not, though. Guy’s statement wasn’t just about the appearance of goodwill, he might love Madge the same way many divorced parents still love each other. Both Madonna and Guy seem to adore their kids, and he probably knows better than anyone how much she wanted to adopt Mercy.

Here’s Guy leaving his Punchbowl pub in London (sporting quite the bruise) on March 25th. Images thanks to WENN .

In other Malawi adoption news, David Banda was allowed to visit with his biological father while visiting Malawi this week. Banda seemed not to know who the man was at first, but warmed up to him quickly. While speaking to his father, the little boy expressed that he missed his adopted father, Guy Ritchie, very much.

While there, David was able to visit with his biological father Yohane Banda, but the tot didn’t know who he was.

David and Yohane spent about three hours together – it was the first time since 2006 – but the little boy didn’t recognize his bio father. Yohane was stunned that David didn’t know who he was or that he couldn’t speak his native language.

Yohane said, “He asked me in English who I was and what I do. When I told him, ‘I am your daddy’ he looked surprised. We spent three hours together… he played with my nose and although he did not know who I was he asked me lots of questions.

“David is quite chatty and intelligent. He asked whether I ride horses but I told him horses are for the rich. He asked me why I am poor. He said his mum likes riding horses and told me that one day he and his brother, Rocco, rode horses and fell. He said his mum spanked him because they are not supposed to ride on their own.”

David also told Yohane he misses his nanny, who quit (or fired by Madonna… whichever rumor you believe). “He misses her a lot because she used to read him books. Nowadays he has different nannies and he doesn’t like the situation.”

The three-year-old spoke of his relationship with Guy Ritchie.

“He seems to like his daddy Mr. Ritchie so much,” said Yohana. “I was a sad Madonna broke up with him. I would have loved it if they sorted out whatever problems they had instead of divorcing because divorce is bad for kids.”

[From Showbizspy.com]

Wow! That’s a lot of very interesting information. First, who would have thought that Madonna would spank her kids? Isn’t she supposed to be so spiritual and peaceful and non-violent thanks to Kabbalah? And also, wouldn’t you think she’d just get the nanny to do it? And speaking of nannies – it’s quite telling that the two people David misses are his nanny and Guy Ritchie. Before the divorce, these were probably the two people he saw the most. It’s also interesting that Madonna has made absolutely no effort to teach David anything about the country he came from, or to give the child any background on himself. He didn’t even know his own father, and he didn’t understand why his father was poor.