Michael Jackson is trying to restart his rusty career. After seeing the greatest boy band of time reunite, Jackson is rumored to want to work with them. The New Kids on the Block start touring in September and have reportedly been hosting “secret talks” with the “Thriller” signer.

The band held secret talks with Michael, 49, at his Nevada home last week. They are the latest in a string of artists - including Kanye West, will.i.am, Ne-Yo and Akon - rumoured to be working with him as he attempts to revive his career following his acquittal of child abuse charges three years ago.

[Monsters and Critics]

Donny Wahlberg, the token bad boy of the band, spilled the beans while discussing how excited he was to have Michael on board. While Jackson is getting into the groove of the New Kids tour, he has been working in the studio for months on a new album. There is no official release date yet, but according to reports it is due out this year.

I am worried because Michael looks like he is not in a good state to be doing the sprinkler on any stage with the boy band. I guess they aren’t really boys anymore, but Jackson was last seen yesterday in a wheelchair. He wore his pajamas and a surgical mask paired with a black towel on his head secured by a baseball cap. He was just taking the kiddies out shopping for some new toys, but I am not sure this was the way to go.

Let’s just pray it is all a ruse. Maybe he was going for an incognito look. Then again he might as well have been flying a flag that said “freak show” on it.

Michael Jackson is shown at Christian Audiger’s 50th birthday party on 5/23/08. NKOTB are shown at the Much Music video awards on 6/16/08, thanks to WENN.

Crazy ass Jackson family patriarch Joe Jackson has decided it’d be a really good idea to the Jackson 5 back together – with the additional drama of sisters LaToya and Janet thrown in. While rumors of a reunion have been floating around for decades, supposedly the family is pretty close to working out a deal with a production company.

They would all move into the Jackson family home in Encino, California. That’s right, not only do we have Jackson family singing, we have Jackson family midnight pillow fights. Or whatever the hell they do. Supposedly Michael has even agreed to be involved, though he’ll be the only one not moving into the house.

The family is hoping that because Michael and Janet are on board it will clinch the deal. “They feel the timing is right - because Michael is becoming professionally active again, and they believe fans are ready to find out what the family is doing,” an insider told the Enquirer.

“The show will follow the lives of the brothers as they move back into the old Jackson family home in the L.A. suburb of Encino and live and perform together again.”

Michael will continue living in his Las Vegas home but will be a big part of the show… The series will center on the at-times dysfunctional family dynamics of the brothers, Michael’s eccentricity, and the flamboyant sisters, Janet and LaToya.

“Although Michael will stop in and oversee some of the recording with The Jacksons, he’ll be doing most of his singing from his private studio in Las Vegas and then have the tapes transferred to where his brothers are laying down tracks in L.A.,” explained the insider. Jermaine will run the show, but Michael has made it very clear that he wants the last say on the music.” According to the insider, Jermaine is convinced the show will be a smash hit.

[From the National Enquirer, July 7th, 2008, print ed.]

What can possibly go wrong? Frankly, I think they should do it. By most accounts the Jackson family is so messed up that it can’t really get any worse. And only Janet has a bit of a career left. Michael’s going to have to rebuild everything from the ground up. So what have they got to lose? Respect? Already gone. Fame? Gone. Money? Gone. Well, mostly. They might as well see how long they can beat this dead horse.

Michael Jackson briefly came out of the woodwork this weekend to celebrate friend Christian Audigier’s 50th birthday in Los Angeles. The party was attended by some major showbiz heavyweights, including Britney Spears. That’s right, Britney and Michael were in the same room, and the universe did NOT implode. That’s a lot of potential crazy within 100 yards, easily enough to knock the earth off its axis.

Despite the potential hazards to humanity, the party went off without a hitch, with celebrities like Fergie, Pam Anderson, and Snoop Dogg also in attendance. However everyone was disappointed in the King of Pop, who failed to perform at the event – choosing to mutter a few words into a microphone and then exit hastily.

The crowd went wild as Michael Jackson strode purposefully on stage and picked up a microphone. Was this the moment he was going to break into song and end his years of silence? Er, no. The fallen star just muttered a few words… then slunk back into his self-imposed obscurity.

The huge anti-climax came at an exclusive showbiz party in Los Angeles to mark fashion designer Christian Audigier’s 50th birthday. A-list guests - including Britney Spears and Pamela Anderson - went into a frenzy as Audigier introduced the “King of Pop”. But all they got as Jacko, 49, stepped onto the platform was a whispered, “Hello”. He added politely: “Christian is the King of Fashion” before turning on his heels and trouping off.

An insider said: “Everyone went mad when he grabbed the microphone. The mood was electric. But sadly there was no impromptu gig. It was a shame because he looked in pretty good shape. He was obviously just putting in an appearance for his old pal Christian.”

[From the Mirror]

The Daily Mail notes that Britney was at the party, escorted by her father Jaime Spears and agent Jason Trawick. Fergie performed and Pamela Anderson gave a speech… which I’m guessing was super inspiring. But she did manage to flash the crowd – and nothing inspires like Pam Anderson’s ladybits. I didn’t realize that Britney’s dad was monitoring her so closely that he was actually her date to events. Hopefully he doesn’t go all Joe Simpson on her.

Michael Jackson disappointing isn’t really anything exciting, in and of itself. He’s not exactly the sort to surprise everyone and whip out a performance. Though apparently he did whip off his face mask for a while – and really, that’s about all we can hope for from the guy.

Here’s Michael Jackson, Britney Spears, Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush, Christian Audigier and family, Fergie, Alessandra Ambrosio, Pamela Anderson at Audigier’s birthday party at the Petersen Automotive museum in Los Angeles on Friday. Images thanks to WENN.

According to Page Six, Michael Jackson is swearing off women. Yes, I had the same reaction you’re having right now: who knew women were still in the running with Jacko? Well apparently they are – at least enough to deserve a swearing off. Michael has found himself in all kinds of financial trouble in the last few years – and it’s only gotten worse. Apparently the resulting inability to buy nine dozen camels and diamond-encrusted lily pads for his seven indoor ponds has forced Jackson to get back to work. He’s hired some of the best producers around – and sworn off all distractions, including the ladies.

Michael Jackson’s legal bills have prompted him to go back to work - and this time he’s serious. He’s hired music producers RedOne and Akon to mastermind his new album, and the trio began working together at the Palms recording studio in Las Vegas Wednesday. “Michael is producing the album himself and then will sell it to a record company when he’s finished,” our spy said. To maintain the utmost concentration, “Michael has banned his kids from the recording studio. He realizes this is very important and doesn’t want any distractions.” Jacko has also sworn off women for the time being, despite never seeming to care much for them anyway. Jackson - who supposedly had been seeing his children’s nanny, Grace Rwaramba - told pals, “He’s not going to be involved in any personal relationships with women until he gets this record done. He’s dumped the nanny - she’s not around any more.”

[From Page Six]

Don’t feel badly, I’m giggling hysterically too. How much do you think Michael had to pay that friend to leak such obvious bullshit to the press? I realize the whole point is that he doesn’t have much cash – but clearly he’s got enough to bribe people into telling blatant lies. The rumors about him being involved with Grace Rwaramba have been floating around for quite a while. But unless Grace is really a man, I think it’s pretty safe to say she was never much of a distraction in the first place. Good luck Michael. May you work in undistracted glory.

Here’s Michael Jackson being chased by fans while shopping on Melrose Avenue in Los Angeles on November 15th. Images thanks to WENN.

First the good news. Janet Jackson is going to be writing a diet book. The songstress has long had issues with her weight, I think just about everyone can sympathize with that, and it seems she’s going to share her secrets to that newly slimmed body.

“It’s not just this sterile, weight loss and how to do it book, but my journey even from when I was a kid … being an emotional eater,” said Jackson, who is 41.

“It takes you through those moments in my life up ’til now and what worked for me. And hopefully within that, if it doesn’t work for them, maybe they’ll find something that does work for them and a nice place for them to be content with who they are.”

Jackson, who said last month on CNN’s “Larry King Live” that she liked French fries, sweets, caramel and candy apples, reportedly put on 60 pounds in 2006.

Reuters

The book won’t be a traditional diet book, but instead address the issues of emotional eating. I’m glad that it is not a strict diet to follow, because I have never been able to follow an eating plan.

I have my own health philosophy I got from comedian Billy Connolly, “Don’t eat anything that comes in a bucket!” This link NSFW.

In other Janet news, her Saturday Night Live appearance has been cancelled as she is still recovering from the flu that hospitalized her on Sunday. Mariah Carey will take her place.

The Jackson family today announced, through Tito, that he will be purchasing two homes in England for the family to live on. He has been in Devon this week campaigning against bullying.

‘We hope it will be a family hideaway where my brothers and sisters can escape media attention when we need to,’ he said.

‘I can confirm that he [Michael] has been to Barnstaple on private visits in recent years along with my brother Jermaine and a few other Jackson siblings.

‘My family love North Devon and the wonderful countryside and friendly people. I am looking forward to living in Barnstaple and I hope the Barnstaple public will respect our family’s privacy.’

He says Michael, Janet and co are egging him on insisting North Devon can be used as a private escape for them all, saying: ‘Michael likes North Devon, too, as no one bothers him.’

Metro

Tito appears on British television as a judge on talent show It Takes Two.

This follows the news that a woman named Billy Jean Jackson (not related to the Jacksons) was arrested for trespassing –on the Neverland Ranch! The ranch and its contents are up for auction next Wednesday as creditors foreclose on the mortgage. This is not the first time Billy Jean has attempted to enter the property, but what she is searching for on the premises has not been revealed. She does claim to be Michael’s wife. Next time, Billy Jean should work on getting her hair done before she enters – this is a really unfortunate mug shot.

Note by Celebitchy: Here is Janet Jackson signing copies of her new CD “Discipline” at Virgin Megastore in Hollywood on 2/28/08. Doesn’t she look like one of the “Celebrities Without Necks“?

Michael Jackson’s Neverland Ranch is up for auction – by the trustees, not the pop star himself, and will include everything in the house and on the grounds:

Jackson received word Monday from Financial Title Company, the trustee, that unless he pays off $24,525,906.61 by that date, a public auction will go forward in Santa Barbara, Calif., in front of the county courthouse.

It’s not just the house either. When Neverland is auctioned, it will include everything: all personal property inside, all fixtures and appliances, furniture, and “all merry go round type devices,” any rides, games. The auction literally includes every single thing that is or isn’t nailed down.

Fox News

Michael hasn’t lived there since 2005, when he moved to Bahrain following his last child molestation trail. While the Ranch does have a zoo, all of the animals are gone, and some of the rides are shut down too. No one lives there currently.

Michael Jackson has been in financial trouble for quite some time, as a result of some bad business decisions and large loans he has been unable to pay. Several years of legal action, from his child molestation cases, his Neverland employees, and business associates, have also drained his finances. MJ just released a new edition of his best selling album, titled Thriller 25, maybe a check will clear from his royalties and he’ll be able to buy his house back, but it’s doubtful.

Fox News suggests that if the property is not sold at auction in March, it will be listed with a real estate agent and marketed as a private corporate retreat. There is also a possibility that a very rich person might be interested in purchasing what could be quite a bargain in the fire sale.

I can imagine a very wealthy parent who likes to spoil their children might buy this for their family. The property, according to Wiki, is 11km², and has a zoo and a theme park, with a Ferris wheel, merry-go-round, zipper, spider, sea dragon, wave swinger, super slide, dragon wagon kiddie roller coaster and bumper cars.

I don’t know why people think Jacko is crazy for having the property – doesn’t it sound like fun? Unfortunately the ranch has somehow just become another sign of his wackiness, and evidence that he is a child molester. I’ve always thought it was such a shame that Michael Jackson has become best known for his marriage to Lisa Marie Presley, court appearances and plastic surgery instead of his music. Regardless of your opinion of his personal life, he is incredibly talented.

Bust out your “I Heart Tito” tops kids! The Jackson 5 will be touring again. Marlon, Tito, Jackie, Jermaine and yes even Michael will be bringing the afro back. For the first time in over 23 years they will gather together to crank out a live tour starting in the UK. It is more like the Jackson 4 and that creepy manimal, but they are excited to have Michael on board.

Michael will be involved. We want to tour. We want to touch the lives of everybody who’s bought our records and supported us. It will probably start here first, but it will be sometime in 2008. That’s our plan.

[From BBC 6 Music]

Meanwhile, Jermaine has been busy peddling his family story. Currently, he is putting together a musical based on the early days of creating the Jackson 5. Another project in relation to the musical has reportedly peeked the interest of the brutally honest “America Idol” judge….Simon Cowell.

“We have a show called In Search of the Legends: The Jackson 5. We’re finding people who are gonna play us which is gonna be a reality show. I’m talking to Simon Cowell for some of his involvement. We’re very excited about it.”

Is it just me or does anyone else see the potential flop? It sounds to me like it will be a huge circus-like gathering. They might as well throw Britney in there and make it the worst attempt at a last ditch effort.

Note by Celebitchy: Here’s the Jackson 5 doing “I Want You Back”

Apparently people were all up in a tizzy saying Michael Jackson was getting married. To a woman. A genetically original woman. I didn’t hear anything about said tizzy, but it was big enough to require Jacko’s people to release an official statement. Apparently it’s not true. Though he’s such a weird guy and there’s so much mystery surrounding him that I wouldn’t rule anything out. He probably did get married, it was just to a coffee maker or other random household appliance instead of a woman.

“Michael Jackson and his kids remain the only ones donning the veils in the family. The singer’s rep issued a firm denial Thursday in response to a sudden flurry of reports stating that the self-proclaimed King of Pop had swapped vows with his children’s nanny, Grace Rwaramba, a frequent fixture in the courtroom during his trial on child-molestation charges in 2005.

“‘Wide spreading reports regarding Michael Jackson being married are not true,’ publicist and resident rumor-buster Raymone Bain said in a statement to E! News. ‘Documents stating otherwise are a hoax.’

“Earlier Thursday, the National Enquirer’s Website quoted a source supposedly close to the pair who said, ‘Grace was happy to go along with it. She’s always been devoted to Michael and has raised the kids since the day they were born. Michael knew she’d make a perfect stepmother.’
“The tabloid also said that it had obtained a real estate document on which Jackson referred to himself as a ‘married man.’”

[From E! News]

How does Michael Jackson keep getting so many ladies? He looks like a lady! Michael’s got some serious financial worries. He’s being sued by just about every business in America, and a least three quarters of the American public. I’m guessing that – if he did marry the kids’ nanny – he just did it to save money since he wouldn’t have to pay her a salary anymore. But let’s be honest, being the King of Pop’s wife has its advantages. You always have access to blankets when you’re cold – just reach over and pull one off a random kid. You have unlimited Jesus Juice. All the monkeys you can handle. And the guy will never bother you for sex at three in the morning. In fact you probably won’t even have to share a bed with him. Sounds like an ideal marriage to me. Especially the monkeys.

Picture Note by Jaybird: Images thanks to PR Photos.

Every so often you hear a story about one of Michael Jackson’s crazy eccentricities – and his PR people always rush to tell you all the wonderful, charitable things he does for people, kind of to counteract the madness. But after a while, you hear so many bizarre things, and enough of them turn out to be true that you realize someone’s really a nutcase. We all reached this point a long time ago with Jackson, especially regarding crazy lawsuits against the guy. But one emerged today that tells a pretty clear story about the true selfishness of his character.

Back in 2005, Michael had that pesky little child molestation trial. He showed up late, or in pajamas, or not at all, on several occasions, often citing his fragile health. On one occasion he went to the hospital for “flu-like” symptoms – I think it was one of the times the judge ordered deputies to come find him and bring him to trial. Well this particular time, Jackson was admitted to Marian Medical Center in Santa Maria. The hospital didn’t have any empty double rooms, only half occupied doubles and singles. Well a single wasn’t enough space for Jackson, and he certainly couldn’t be bothered to be charitable enough to another human being as to share a double room with them. So Manuela Gomez Ruiz, who was already in a double room, was booted out to make way for Jackson and his entourage. Ruiz had just had a heart attack that day, and had been on critical life supporting machines until she was kicked out and kept in an exam room using hand-pumped oxygen. She had another heart attack, but due to the hubbub of Jackson’s presence, doctors couldn’t get to her in time, and she died. So her family is suing Jackson and Marian Medical Center, in what seems to be a very fair case. Unfortunately the case has been halted, and the family will have to re-file over technicalities.

“The family of Manuela Gomez Ruiz had sued Jackson and Marian Medical Center in Santa Maria, claiming she was kept from critical care after she had a heart attack on the same day Jackson was brought in with flu-like symptoms during his 2005 child-molestation trial. Jackson was acquitted in the case.

“Judge Rodney Melville — also the judge in Jackson’s molestation case — on Tuesday allowed challenges to the complaint filed by attorneys for Jackson and the hospital, who had argued the facts of the case didn’t justify the complaint.
“Melville gave the plaintiffs’ attorney, James McKiernan, 30 days to redraft their complaint. McKiernan said he would refile the necessary documents.

The lawsuit said the 73-year-old Ruiz was on life-support after a massive heart attack and was moved from a two-bed room so Jackson could occupy it by himself. She was kept alive in an exam room using hand-pumped oxygen until she could be reconnected to a life-support machine, court papers said.

“The lawsuit alleged she had another heart attack but the crowd milling around the pop star delayed her arrival at the critical-care unit. Ruiz died later that night. The complaint cites the ‘outrageous, circus-like atmosphere they orchestrated during the last hours of Manuela Ruiz’s life and its obvious emotional and mental lasting effects upon the plaintiffs.’”

[From the Associated Press]

This is one lawsuit that I truly hope goes through. I know people will say Michael Jackson didn’t actually kill her, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t bare some culpability. Yes he didn’t sit on her chest or anything, but if he hadn’t been his diva self and had settled for a private room or shared the room Ms. Ruiz was already occupying, she might not have died. The biggest ethical burden lays with the hospital, in my opinion. Michael Jackson can act like a queen bee all he wants, they still have the moral obligation to look out for all of their patients equally, and it sounds like they didn’t do that. I doubt Jackson has any money left to his name, but I hope he’s penalized in some way. If he truly cares about people as much as he claims – and let’s be honest, that’s all PR spin – he should spend the rest of his life feeling horribly guilty that his selfishness contributed to another person’s death.

Picture note by JayBird: Here’s Michael at the 2006 World Music Awards. Image thanks to PR Photos.

Just when you think life couldn’t suck for Michael Jackson anymore than it already does: surprise! He’s being sued again! In fact two completely separate lawsuits involved completely unrelated issues were filed within two days of each other. Several years ago I remember reading that at any one point, Michael Jackson has three lawsuits pending against him. This was during his molestation trial, and I remember thinking that number was an exaggeration – but now I’m pretty sure it’s dead on. First up to bat this time around are a team of Michael’s former lawyers… you know, the very guys that have to deal with his constant lawsuits. Turns out, the Gloved One doesn’t really think he needs to pay for things, including legal services. Besides Jesus Juice, I can’t think of anything Michael goes through more of than lawyers. The Los Angeles law firm of Lavely & Singer has sued Michael for $113,000 the singer has failed to pay. The firm had sent up a payment plan to help Jackson settle up his bill of $540,000, but even then he failed to make the last payment.

“Several lawyers who worked for Michael Jackson claim “Jacko” hasn’t paid the money he owes them.

“A lawsuit filed in Los Angeles County Superior Court claims Jackson owes the law firm of Lavely & Singer $113,750, the Web site tmz.com reported. Even after setting up a payment plan to pay off the debts, Jackson failed to do so, according to the lawsuit.

“This is not the first time Jackson has been accused of not paying his legal bills. The same Web site reported in June that a Delaware-based law firm sued Jackson. Lawyers claimed he owed them nearly $110,000. The Web site reported that the Delaware firm acted as general counsel for Jackson in a lawsuit where a concert promoter sued Jackson, saying he backed out of two New Year’s Eve concerts in 2000.

“On July 17, 2007, the Web site showbizspy.com reported that Jackson was ordered to pay more than $256,000 in outstanding legal bills associated with part of his defense in the child molestation charges in 2005. The Web site reported that Jackson’s attorney agreed in principle to the judgment because going to trial would be costly for his client.”

[From NBC affiliate wyff4.com]

Has Michael Jackson paid for anything since around 1992? I think he’s just relied on the kindness of others, and people’s assumptions that he’ll pay them back. Look, a guy with his own Tilt-a-Whirl is not reliable folks. Even Michael’s former friends are suing him. Remember how he escaped to Bahrain after he was acquitted of child molestation? Well the Prince Abdullah - who so generously put him up – has filed a lawsuit against Jacko as well. Abdullah showered Jackson with gifts during his stay. According to Fox News, “He housed him, fed him, chauffeured him and even imported Jacko’s friends to Bahrain for a special Christmas in 2005.” What did the Sheik want in turn for is kindness? To make a record – and Jackson agreed.

“All the prince wanted in return was to make a CD and start a record company with Michael. Jackson agreed, as usual signed agreements he had no intention of keeping and then did no work. You may recall Two Seas Records, the joint venture that Jackson agreed to, for example.

“Now the prince is demanding in his lawsuit that Michael go to work for him as agreed. Abdullah expects Jackson to make his record and put it out so the prince can begin to recoup the millions he invested in Michael during their friendship. Fat chance.

“Jackson hasn’t worked at anything in years — no performing, no recording. Occasionally, he announces that he is making some kind of record, but so far there’s no evidence of this.

“That Jackson is now being sued — in London, no less — by his former benefactor is a bad sign for the singer. He has depended on the kindness of Arab billionaires for some time now, but between this and what seems to be his current nomad status, he may have exhausted his credit in the last place where it still existed.”

[From Fox News]

I guess there’s no point in commenting on the crazy that is Michael Jackson. It’s all been said. I think the guy has pretty much burned all his bridges. For years Michael’s family and lawyers have talked about how often people try to take advantage of him. It seems he’s pretty good at taking advantage of everyone else, too.

Thanks to SplashNews for this picture.